The Bitter Taste
by Ababy99
Summary: 6 years into the future. Brooke is a succesful singer in New York, but she had to go back to Tree Hill bc Nathan got into a car accident. Does history love a broken heart? BRATHAN. ReadandReview
1. Because Of You

**The Bitter Taste**

**Because Of You**

**(A/N-Summary) This is set 6 years into the future. Brooke and Nathan had hooked up, and got together when Haley had left. Haley came back and Brooke pursued a music career and left Tree Hill. Nathan and Haley ended up getting a divorce because Haley was still involved with Chris. Lucas and Peyton are together, but don't be surprised if there aren't much of them in my story. **

The suite was filled with smoke and the scent of booze. Drugs were scattered on the tables and counters, and the beds were being occupied by people that had only known each other for 15 minutes.

And in the middles of all the chaos was Brooke. She had been quite the partier back in the high school days, but she stood back as she watched the people, and how they acted. Brooke watched in awe as people snorted cocaine from the desk tops, and how a joint was being passed around the room.

Sure, there was alcohol at high school parties, but nothing hardcore like what she was seeing. It wasn't unusual for there to be parties like this, Brooke was used to it. Her album was number one on the charts, and on TRL. Brooke was exhilarated, but it was that certain conversation on TRL that had got her thinking about high school and Tree Hill…

"_She has a hit single "Because of You", and a number one album," Carson Daly announced, "Welcome to the show everyone, Brooke Davis!"_

_The fans yelled and cheered, some of them even cried as Brooke walked from behind the curtain and to the stage. She smiled to all of them and waved; she walked up to Carson and gave him a hug, "Hi!" She said enthusiastically into the microphone._

"_It's good to have you here," Carson said._

_Brooke smiled, "It's good to be here!"_

"_You are a very cheery person," Carson said, which got a few laughs from the audience._

_Brooke laughed along as well, "I was a cheerleader in high school," she said._

"_Where did you go to high school?" Carson asked._

_Brooke cleared her throat, "I went to Tree Hill high."_

"_Tree Hill?" Carson questioned._

"_North Carolina," Brooke said, "I was the captain of the Ravens' cheerleading squad."_

_The guys all whooped and cheered and Brooke smiled sweetly at them all, "You in a cheerleading outfit is definitely a great image for these guys," Carson teased, "We just saw your music video and the concept seems kind of different to me," he began, "It's you, and a guy, and another girl…"_

"_Yes," Brooke said, "The concept is about how this guy and I are totally in love, and then his ex sort of comes back to town and ruins everything for us," she explained, "So it's saying that because of this guy I can't go out and be who I want to be, because without him I'm nothing."_

_The audience awed and cheered as Carson smiled, "It sounds like you know a lot about having your heart broken…" _

"What girl doesn't?" Brooke asked with a shrug.

_The girls in the audience applauded, "So your saying you've had your heart broken before?"_

_Brooke froze and looked down at the ground, she was on national television. She didn't want to seem like a prude, but she didn't want to break down in cry in front of everyone. Brooke looked back up at Carson and gave him a fake smile, "I've had my heart lightly damage," she lied._

Brooke walked out of her suite and out into the parking lot. How could she have put everything she had been through behind her? The concept from the music video was from the heart, and so was the song.

She wrote the song the night on the bus when she left; it was about Nathan, whether she wanted to admit it or not. It was like she just wanted to pretend like everything in her life had never happened.

Brooke felt hands grip her hips and she turned around to see her boyfriend of 10 months standing there with a drunken smile on his face. His name was Alex, and he was a songwriter and singer. Brooke had met him when she went to a bar when she first got to New York. They had immediately become lovers which permanently put Brooke in a bad situation.

Alex was always drunk or high, and Brooke had somehow got caught up with all the partying and all the drugs. The night Alex took advantage of her while she was high was the night Brooke vowed never to do drugs again. And she hasn't ever since; Alex was at times an abusive son of a bitch, and everyone that they worked with knew it.

But Brooke couldn't leave him; he was her strength and comfort. She had tried before, but she always came back. Alex kissed her forcefully on the lips; Brooke could taste the stale alcohol after the kiss ended.

"You are so beautiful," he slurred; Brooke smiled politely and ran her hands through his black hair, "I want to take you upstairs and kiss you…"

Brooke laughed, "I have a show tomorrow," she said and then wrapped her arms around his skinny body. That's one thing she missed about Nathan, his strength. Brooke never dated a jock again after the Nathan incident; she stuck to the emo boys, the junkies, the boys that only cared about their guitars and their feelings.

Alex and Brooke walked up to his room and Alex again kissed Brooke as they both fell onto the bed. He never listened; he never knew what stop meant so Brooke just let him have his fun. They made love or something like it until Alex got tired. He rolled over and fell quickly asleep while Brooke stared up at the ceiling.

It was different then when she was with Nathan, he stayed awake and they would just lay in each other's arms and talk. Brooke mentally kicked herself; she wasn't supposed to be thinking about Nathan. She bit her bottom lip and felt the tears travel to the ends of her eyes and then fall.

**xxx**

Brooke sat in her dressing room as her make up got put on, and her hair got straightened. She sipped her coffee slowly and warmed up her voice; Alex walked in with a dozen roses and placed them in front of her, "Good luck tonight beautiful," he said and then kissed her on the cheek.

She watched him leave the room and then looked at the flowers. They were the same ones she got before every show, red roses with a card that said "Good luck! I love you! Alex." Brooke would say thank you and keep the roses in her house for awhile, but the truth was she couldn't stand red roses. She was always a white rose kind of girl, but of course Alex didn't know or care.

"Full house tonight babe," Brooke's personal assistant and friend, Lilly, said as she popped her gum and looked at a magazine that had Brooke's picture on the cover.

Brooke loved Lilly; and Lilly was exactly like her name sounded. Lilly: blonde, hyper, funny, lovable, ditzy. She was like Brooke in high school, except with blonde hair and bigger boobs. Brooke smiled and winked at her, "More people means more money," she said and then got up from her make up chair.

"This means more slutty clothes for us to wear!" Lilly said enthusiastically as they walked towards the stage, "Good luck!"

Brooke smiled and gave her friend a quick hug before heading out onto the dark stage and sitting at the piano. The lights finally came on and the audience went wild, Brooke laughed gratefully, "How are you doing tonight New York?" She asked into the microphone. The crowd went wild and cheered and applauded. Brooke started to play the piano softly.

_**I will not make the same mistakes that you did **_

_**I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery **_

_**I will not break the way you did **_

_**You fell so hard **_

_**I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far **_

Brooke sang and felt the adrenaline rush into her body; it happened every time she belt out this song.

_**Because of you **_

_**I never stray too far from the sidewalk **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I learned to play on the safe side**_

_**So I don't get hurt **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I find it hard to trust **_

_**Not only me, but everyone around me **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I am afraid **_

_**I lose my way **_

_**And it's not too long before you point it out **_

_**I cannot cry **_

_**Because I know that's weakness in your eyes **_

_**I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh**_

_**Every day of my life **_

_**My heart can't possibly break **_

_**When it wasn't even whole to start with **_

Brooke looked out into the audience and saw a familiar face in the audience. It was Haley, with Chris. They made eye contact and Haley mouthed to her, "After the show…"

_**Because of you **_

_**I never stray too far from the sidewalk **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I learned to play on the safe side **_

_**So I don't get hurt **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I find it hard to trust **_

_**Not only me, but everyone around me **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I am afraid **_

_**I watched you die **_

_**I heard you cry**_

_**Every night in your sleep **_

_**I was so young **_

_**You should have known better than to lean on me **_

_**You never thought of anyone else **_

_**You just saw your pain **_

_**And now I cry **_

_**In the middle of the night **_

_**For the same damn thing**_

Brooke slowed down the song and closed her eyes tightly. All she wanted was to go back to Nathan; all she wanted was everything to be perfect again.

_**Because of you **_

_**I never stray too far from the sidewalk **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I learned to play on the safe side **_

_**So I don't get hurt **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I tried my hardest just to forget everything **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I don't know how to let anyone else in **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty **_

_**Because of you **_

_**I am afraid **_

But she couldn't go back to him, it had been 6 years and they hadn't spoken since she Brooke had left. Brooke didn't need him, or at least that's what she convinced herself as she neared the end of the song. He had moved on, and she had moved on. It was over…

**_Because of you…_**

**_Because of you…_**

Brooke smiled sweetly out towards the audience and walked off the stage. She was greeted by Alex who scooped her up in his arms and kissed her passionately, "You did awesome babe," he said.

"Thanks," Brooke said sweetly and kissed him back, "Hold on," she said as she walked out towards the audience while everyone was leaving. She saw Haley and Chris standing near the exit.

Brooke ran up to them and wiped the hair out of her face, "Isn't this a blast from the past?" She said sarcastically.

Haley laughed, "You have a really good voice," she complimented, and then went to say something but bit her tongue.

"Who would've thought?" Brooke said, finishing Haley's thoughts, "What's up Tutor Girl?"

"God nobody's called me that in forever!" Haley said with a genuine smile, "I just thought you'd want to know that Nathan's in the hospital…"

Brooke looked at Chris, "Did you finally try to kill him off?" She asked coldly.

Chris glared at her as Haley stepped between the two, "It was a car wreck," she began, "He got hit by a drunk driver, and he's in the hospital so…"

"Is he going to be okay?" Brooke asked as she started to gnaw on her bottom lip.

Haley shrugged, "He's not going to die, but…He's in pretty bad shape," she said, "Look, I came here because I think you should go see him."

Brooke let out a sarcastic laugh, "Are you joking?"

"I know you're pissed at him," Haley said, "And that you're probably pissed at me…"

Brooke rolled her eyes, "Send him my regards okay?" She said and then started to walk off.

Haley grabbed Brooke's arm, "You need to see him Brooke," she ordered, "You need to see everyone in Tree Hill, everyone misses you…You left without an explanation."

"Exactly," Brooke said as she crossed her arms, "Coming back is just going to make things worse…"

Haley groaned, "Stop being so god damn stubborn!" She said, "Would it kill you to see him?"

"Yeah," Brooke said softly as she looked down at the ground.

"He'd want to see you," Haley said, "He'll be in Tree Hill Hospital for…I don't know how long, but I really think you should go see him." Brooke nodded and didn't say a word, "It was good to see you again Brooke," Haley said before turning to walk out the door.

Brooke looked up and smiled, "Yeah, you too," she said and Haley turned around. They shared a smile and Haley continued walking out the door.

**xxx**

Brooke started packing quickly in her hotel room, she heard the door open and Alex walked in and looked at her in confusion, "Where are you going?" He asked as he lit a cigarette.

"I have to go back to Tree Hill for a little bit," Brooke said as she zipped up her suitcase, "A friend of mine's in the hospital…"

Alex rolled his eyes, "Are you fucking kidding me right now?"

"Alex," Brooke stated, "I'll only be gone a couple a days, a week at the most."

Alex leaned against the dresser and took a drag from his cigarette, "Fine, then go," he said coldly, "Run back to your little Tree Hill home and fuck some of your townie boyfriends!" He spat.

"That's not how it is," Brooke said softly; one thing that had changed from high school is that she couldn't stand up for herself anymore.

Alex slammed his fist into the mirror, "I made you Brooke! I could easily break you!"

"You're drunk!" Brooke yelled back, "Just don't do this to me, this is the only thing I've ever asked of you!"

Alex grabbed Brooke forcefully and slammed her up against the wall, "Take off your goddamn clothes and get into that bed," he said.

"Get the fuck off me!" Brooke said through gritted teeth and then kneed Alex in the balls. Alex fell over onto the bed and moaned in pain, "We're done Alex," Brooke said and then ran out of the hotel with her luggage.

**Read and Review.**


	2. Coming This Far

**The Bitter Taste**

**Coming This Far**

**--Thanks everyone for all the reviews you guys are awesome:**

**-Nate and Jake- Thank you so much for the review!  
****-OTHlover04- Thank you!  
****-Kaos2405- Thank you!  
****-BrookenLucas12- I'm glad you love this story, and I'm going to try to make this one a long one, because Brathan's are my favorite!  
****-Mony19- Thanks, I love Brathan too  
****-Selene Romanov- I intend on making Brooke play a little nurse wink, wink And I'm glad you liked the end with Alex and Brooke, I just wanted to make sure the readers knew that Brooke still had some spunk left in her.  
****-Nookieforever07- I wanted to change this up a bit and I'm glad you like it. Thanks!  
****-Cap'n Keira Sparrow- Thanks for the review!  
****-Catz- Yes, very compelling, thanks!  
****-Belle-Baby- Yeah, that Alex guy is definitely an asshole. I always want that specific character that everyone just hates, and Alex seemed like the perfect guy. Unfortunately, that won't be the last you'll see of him.  
****-SwedishBlonde- Thanks!  
****-dolcegrazia- Thank you, and no I did not write those lyrics. The lyrics are from the song "Because of You" by Kelly Clarkson.  
****-HalesnLukeBFF4Ever- Thanks you!**

**xxx**

Brooke walked out of the airport and got her first glimpse of North Carolina. 6 years had gone by fast. Brooke rented a car and felt her nerves rack up as she passed the sign that said "Welcome to Tree Hill!"

Before she knew it she was crying; she wasn't supposed to be coming back, she was just setting herself up for heartbreak. Brooke thought about Alex and then about Nathan; she told Alex it was over which probably was one of the hardest things she ever had to do. But when she thought about Nathan and about Tree Hill it seemed like nothing else mattered.

She drove to her house and saw that it had been changed a little bit. Brooke got out of her car and knocked on the door. Brooke was surprised when Tim Smith opened the door with a baby in his arms.

"Brooke!" He said in surprise, "Wow, I haven't seen you in years!"

"Hey Tim," Brooke said with a smile as the two of them hugged.

The hug ended and Tim motioned for Brooke to come in, "Come on in…"

Brooke walked into her old house and sat in the kitchen across from Tim as he set the baby in a high chair, "You're a dad?" Brooke asked.

Tim chuckled, "Yeah," he said as he looked adoringly at the baby, "A lot's changed since you've been gone."

"I've noticed," Brooke said as she stroked the baby's cheek, "I would've never expected you to be a dad…"

Tim sighed, "Me neither," he said, "But after Erica and I got married we decided that kids would be good for us…"

"Erica?" Brooke asked, "As in Erica Marsh?"

Erica walked into the kitchen with a huge smile on her face, "The one and only," she said as her and Brooke hugged, "How are you?"

"I'm good," Brooke said, still taking all of it in, "This is like I'm in another universe…"

Erica sat beside Tim as he put his arm around her, "Have you gone to see Nathan yet?" Erica asked, ignoring the shaking of Tim's head.

Brooke bit her bottom lip, "Not yet…" She said and then looked down at the table cloth.

"Did you come back for him?" Erica asked.

Tim groaned, "Erica…"

"What?" Erica asked innocently, "I'm just asking the girl a question sweetie!"

Brooke laughed nervously and cleared her throat, "I came back because I wanted to see everyone, and because Haley came to one of my shows and told me that I should come and see Nathan…So, here I am."

"Oh yeah!" Tim exclaimed, "You're a big time singer now."

"I'm still the same old Brooke," she said with a small smile.

**xxx**

An hour and a half had passed and Brooke said her goodbyes to Erica and Tim. She got into her car and drove to Peyton's house, which she was hoping was still Peyton's. Brooke knocked on the door and heard Peyton's voice yell "hold on". Brooke smiled to herself as she thought about how long it had been since she'd seen Peyton.

The door opened and Peyton saw her old best friend Brooke standing there nervously. Peyton's jaw dropped and she screamed, "Oh my god!" She said as the two friends hugged.

"Hey P. Sawyer," Brooke said as a lone tear fell down her cheek. Brooke walked into the house as Peyton also began to cry.

"How the hell are you?" Peyton asked as she wiped her eyes.

Brooke smiled sadly, "I've been better," she said, "But…I'm doing okay…How are you?"

"Better now that my best friend is back!" Peyton said excitedly, "I can't believe that you're here!"

"I know," Brooke said as she looked around Peyton's house, "Your house looks different…"

Peyton laughed, "Yeah, that's what happens when you have a guy move in."

"Jake?" Brooke asked.

Peyton's smile slowly dropped and she looked down at the ground, "No, actually, um, he had to leave again…"

"Peyton," Brooke said sympathetically, "I'm so sorry…"

"It's cool," Peyton said as she made eye contact with Brooke again, "Nikki was trying to take Jenny away so he had to leave one night, and we keep in touch through emails and stuff, but…We're just not romantically involved anymore."

Brooke sighed as she thought about how long it had been since she was in Tree Hill, "I feel bad Peyton," she said, "So whose this new guy?"

Lucas walked down the stairs, "Brooke Davis?" He asked.

"Lucas!" Brooke screamed as the two of them hugged. Brooke looked at Peyton and winked, "You two are living together? Lucky!"

Peyton and Lucas both laughed, "It's so good to see you Cheery," Lucas said as he rested his hands on Brooke's shoulders, "It's been too long."

"I know," Brooke said softly, "I missed you guys too…"

Lucas walked over to Peyton and put his arm around her waist, "I know this is kind of a sore subject for you, but…"

"I didn't go to see Nathan yet," Brooke said, "I'm kind of dreading that."

Peyton gave Lucas a look and Lucas walked back upstairs, "Girl talk," Peyton said as she took Brooke's hand and led her outside.

"How's he doing?" Brooke asked about Nathan.

Peyton shrugged as the two of them sat down, "Do you mean now, or when you left?"

"He had Haley," Brooke said softly.

Peyton sighed, "Well right now, he broke a few ribs and is just pretty banged up. The doctor's say he's really lucky that he was wearing a seat belt…" Peyton explained, "He was such a mess when you left Brooke."

"I was a mess too," Brooke said sadly, "It was hard because everything was going so well, and then Haley came back…"

"They got a divorce," Peyton said.

Brooke leaned back in her chair, "I kind of figured…Haley was the one who told me about Nathan after one of my shows…And she was with Chris so…"

"They got a divorce about a month after you left, hun," Peyton pointed out, "He loves you so much…"

"Loves?" Brooke questioned, "As in still does?"

"I wouldn't doubt it," Peyton said matter of factly.

Brooke looked down at her nails, "Nathan and I haven't seen each other for about 6 years!" She exclaimed, "There is no way that there is any connection between the two of us!"

"Brooke," Peyton said sternly, "If there's nothing between the two of you then why are you here?"

Brooke opened her mouth, but closed it when she realized that she didn't have a real answer. She looked away from Peyton and out towards the road, Peyton patted Brooke's knee lightly and walked back inside.

**xxx**

"Nathan Scott," Brooke said to the receptionist.

She typed some things on her computer and then smiled sweetly up at Brooke, "Room 23…"

"Thanks," Brooke said and then found room 23. She heard the TV and it sounded like a basketball game; Brooke rolled her eyes, 'Same old Nate,' she thought to herself and then walked into the room.

Nathan looked over to her and dropped the remote; his icy blue eyes were stuck on her and it looked like he had just seen a ghost. Brooke closed the door behind her and walked closer towards his bed.

"Room 23," Brooke said trying to make conversation, "Isn't that you're lucky number or something?" She said with a nervous chuckle.

"Yeah," Nathan said and then picked up the remote and turned off the TV, "I saw you on TRL," he said finally.

Brooke smiled, "I didn't think you watched TRL."

"Well," Nathan said, "When you're stuck in bed and basketball's not on it's the next best thing…Plus, I was always hoping that I would see you on it."

Brooke's heart felt a sharp pain as he spoke those words, "Yeah…" She said as her voice cracked.

"I saw your music video and your interview," Nathan began.

Brooke gnawed on her bottom lip and looked up at the ceiling, "Yeah," she said, "How are you feeling?" She asked quickly.

"It hurts," Nathan said, "But…At least I'm not dead right?"

Brooke nodded, "Right…"

"Who told you I was here?" Nathan asked.

Brooke sat down on the chair beside him and crossed her legs, "Haley came to one of my shows and told me about you…"

"Haley," Nathan said with a roll of his eyes, "Was she with Chris?"

Brooke nodded, "Yeah."

"Figures," Nathan said as he looked down at Brooke, "I'm really glad you're here," he said sincerely.

Brooke sighed, "I'm only going to be here a couple of days…"

"Oh," Nathan said disappointedly, "I thought you'd be staying for good."

Brooke shook her head, "I have a life back in New York you know?"

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Nathan asked apprehensively.

"I did," Brooke said, "But I broke up with him before the trip…"

"Oh?" Nathan said.

"Not because of you," she said as she looked away from him, "He was just an abusive son of a bitch…Always drunk, always high…"

Nathan looked at Brooke sympathetically, "Did he hurt you? 'Cause if he did I'm going to…"

"Going to what Nathan?" Brooke yelled, "Are you going to limp to New York and kick his ass for me?" She asked.

Nathan sighed, "I just…I hate the fact that you were hurting all these years, and I couldn't do anything about it."

Brooke laughed sarcastically, "Are you shitting me right now?" She asked, "You know what hurts more than being verbally and physically abused by Alex?" She said, "The fact that I was in love with someone and they threw me out like garbage for their wife who ended up still cheating on them!" Brooke screamed she stood up from her chair.

"God Brooke!" Nathan yelled back, "Do you know how much of an idiot I am for letting you go for Haley?" He asked as Brooke stood there with her arms crossed, "Not a day goes by that I wish I could've taken back everything that happened!"

"You can't," Brooke spat, "You treated me like every other guy…When you promised that you wouldn't, and when you said that you loved me."

Nathan sighed and looked Brooke in the eyes, "I've always loved you."

"So have I…" Brooke said as she began to cry.

Nathan sat up in his bed, "I get out of this place tomorrow night…Do you think we could talk?"

"This was a mistake," Brooke said, "Coming back here was just…It was just a mistake."

"Please," Nathan said, "We can talk…"

Brooke wiped her tears quickly and nodded her head, "Okay," she said and then left the room.

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	3. Scream Me Something Beautiful

**The Bitter Taste**

**Scream Me Something Beautiful**

**-Thanks for all the good reviews!**

**xxx**

Brooke walked out of Karen's café and saw Peyton coming out of the post office. Brooke walked up to her old best friend and smiled at her. Peyton put her arm around Brooke as the two girls walked down the sidewalk.

"I saw Nathan," Brooke said finally.

Peyton looked at her, "And?"

"And he wants to see me tonight," Brooke began, "We kind of fought a little bit…"

Peyton laughed softly, "It still amazes me how stubborn the two of you can be," she teased.

"I just got pissed whenever he said that he never wanted to hurt me," Brooke said with a roll of her eyes, "Kind of too late for that right?"

Peyton squeezed Brooke tighter and sighed, "He's falling for you again Brooke," she said knowingly, "Why can't you just give the man a chance?"

"Second chances," Brooke scoffed, "That's a crock of shit…"

"Look at me and Lucas," Peyton pointed out, "I gave him a second chance, and we're living together!"

Brooke looked back towards the post office, "But yet you're writing letters to Jake…" She said with a look.

Peyton looked down at the ground, "I sent him some sketches and some lyrics," she said softly, "I miss him," she said, "I love Lucas, I really do…"

"It's just complicated right?" Brooke asked; Peyton nodded, "You can't help who you love, you know?" Brooke said; Peyton shrugged as the two girls continued walking.

**xxx**

It was 8:30, and Nathan had called Brooke to have her come over to his apartment. Brooke took her time getting ready, and her cell phone rang. She looked down at the Caller ID, and saw Alex's name. She ignored the call and ran her hand through her hair.

Brooke knocked on Nathan's apartment door, and he answered the door. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a blue polo shirt. Brooke was dressed in a white, off the shoulder top, and a jean skirt with her Uggz. They smiled at each other, and Brooke walked in and looked around the apartment uncomfortably. 'Too many memories,' she thought, 'Too many…'

"A lot of memories," Nathan said, almost reading Brooke's mind as he put his hands in his pockets.

Brooke turned around and looked at Nathan, "I was just thinking that," she said and then walked over to the kitchen where a steak was set out, "Steak?" She exclaimed.

"I know it's your favorite," Nathan said as he watched Brooke go over to the steak and look at it lovingly.

Brooke looked at Nathan and bit her bottom lip, "Thanks…" She said quietly, "I…I didn't think you'd remember."

Nathan shrugged and pulled out a chair, "Do you want to eat?" He asked; Brooke nodded and sat down in the chair. Nathan brought the food over and sat across from her, "Wine?" He asked.

"Thanks," Brooke said as he poured the red wine in her glass, "God, drinking seems so boring," she said with a small laugh.

Nathan laughed as well, "I know…" He agreed, "I've been drinking since freshman year of high school."

"Me too," Brooke said as she took a sip of her wine, "God, high school was such a rush," she said.

Nathan nodded, "You've changed," he said as Brooke set down her wine glass.

"And how is that?" Brooke asked.

Nathan shrugged and looked at her intently, "You seem more laid back, more reserved…"

"I've kind of kept to myself ever since I left from Tree Hill," Brooke said as she picked at the table cloth.

"So you're saying because of me?" Nathan asked.

Brooke sighed, "I was scared of letting anybody else in…" She said and then looked up at Nathan.

"I'm sor-," Nathan began, but Brooke stopped him.

"Don't," she said sternly, "Why'd you even bring me here?" She asked.

Nathan groaned, "I just wanted to give you a nice dinner…" He said and then threw his napkin down on the table, "I didn't know everything was going to be so god damn difficult."

"What did you expect?" Brooke asked.

"I expected everything to be okay," Nathan said softly.

Brooke scoffed, "You did not just say that to me with a straight face…"

Nathan rubbed his temples and got up and got a beer from the fridge, "Sorry for trying to be nice to you, I'm sorry for _trying_."

"What are you trying to do Nate?" Brooke asked, "You broke my heart and now you expect everything to be better?"

Nathan took a drink, "I want you to trust me!"

"You made a decision a long time ago," Brooke stated, "And it wasn't me."

Nathan set down his beer and looked at Brooke, "And I told you, I made a mistake! You were the best thing that ever happened to me," he said.

"Because I was an easy lay?" Brooke asked sarcastically.

"It was never about the sex!" Nathan exclaimed, "God Brooke, it's not like I fucked you the first night we started dating like some of the guys you used to go with!"

Brooke crossed her legs and looked away from Nathan, "I would've rather been used for my body, then had my heart broken by someone I cared about," she said.

"I've missed you for six years," Nathan began, "All I wanted was to see you and kiss you, and be with you."

Brooke felt a tear roll down her cheek and she wiped it away quickly, "I always thought you were going to come and find me," she said and looked back at Nathan, "But you never did, so I let go…I gave up on you because you gave up on me."

"I didn't know where to look," he said, "I drove to your grandparents in Florida, and your aunt's in California," Nathan said, "So I gave up," he sighed, "And now that you're back, I regret ever giving up."

Brooke sniffed and rested her elbows on the table, "I have to go back to New York," Brooke said as she got up and headed towards the door.

Nathan ran over to her and put his hands on her waist, "I'm not letting you leave again."

"You were the one who left!" Brooke cried, "I just watched while you loved another girl…"

Nathan looked down at Brooke and wiped her tears, "I've missed you," he said with his husky voice. He leaned down and kissed Brooke passionately on the lips.

Brooke kissed him back and then pulled away and cried harder, "You're killing me Nathan," she said and then rushed out of the apartment.

**xxx**

"You ran out of the apartment?" Peyton asked as Brooke sat on her couch crying.

Brooke nodded and reached for another tissue, "I couldn't do it Peyton…I'm so afraid of getting hurt again!"

"Brooke," Peyton said sympathetically, "This must be so hard for you…" She said, "You can stay here for as long as you want," she said with a friendly smile.

Brooke sniffed and shook her head, "I talked to Karen…She said that I can stay in Lucas's old room for as long as I want until I go back to New York," she said; Peyton gave her a surprised look, "I didn't want to be here with you and Lucas…As much as I'd love a threesome with the two of you, the whole love-triangle thing is so high school," she said with a small laugh.

Peyton laughed, "So you're staying?" She asked apprehensively.

"I don't know," Brooke said, "I still have shows that I need to do, and public appearances," she said and then shrugged, "My heart and my head are kind of bickering right now…"

Peyton laid down and looked up at the ceiling, "What's your head saying?"

"My head is telling me to go back to New York and forget about Nathan," she said and then let out a deep breath.

Peyton looked over to Brooke, "And your heart?"

"My heart," Brooke said softly, "It's telling me to stay…"

"Then stay."

Brooke shrugged, "My heart hasn't been very receptive lately," she said, "I mean, my heart told me that Nathan loved me…"

"And he does," Peyton pointed out and then pulled a strand of hair out of Brooke's eyes. She then walked out of the living room leaving Brooke sitting there listening to the crackling of the fire.

Brooke's cell phone rang and she saw Alex's name on the Caller ID. Brooke ignored the call and tossed her phone to the other side of the couch.

**xxx**

Nathan watched TRL and saw that it was a repeat. He saw Brooke come onto the stage and give Carson a hug. She looked so happy, but Nathan could see through her smile.

"_So you're saying you've had your heart broken before?"_ Nathan heard Carson ask Brooke.

Nathan watched as Brooke froze and looked down at the ground_, "I've had my heart lightly damaged,"_ Brooke said.

Nathan turned off the TV and shook his head; she was lying to protect him. It was because of him that Brooke left, and it was his fault that Brooke didn't want to love anymore.

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	4. You Kill Me Well

**The Bitter Taste**

**You Kill Me Well**

**(A/N: First off, thanks for all the reviews! And secondly, Uggz are a type of shoe like Timbaland's.)**

**xxx**

Nathan drove over to Peyton's house and pounded on the door. Peyton opened the door and cocked her hip to the side, "Some people sleep this early in the morning," she said.

Nathan gave her an apologetic look, "I just wanted to know if Brooke was here…"

"Oh," Peyton said as her face softened, "She's actually staying with Karen in Lucas's old room…"

"Okay," Nathan said, "Thanks Peyton," he said and quickly ran to his car.

Peyton watched him tear out of the driveway and she leaned against the doorframe and saw the mail man come up to her. She took the letter he gave her and saw one from Jake. She took the letter and closed the door and walked up to her and Lucas's room.

Nathan knocked on the door to Lucas's room; Brooke opened the door and rolled her eyes. She went to close the door, but Nathan stopped it and looked at her with a grief-stricken look, "Please Brooke," he said.

Brooke allowed him into the room and she sat on the edge of her bed while Nathan stood there nervously in front of her, "What?" Brooke asked impatiently.

"I know that a lot of shit's gone on between us," he began, "And I know that you don't trust me…"

Brooke let out a dry laugh, "Now that's the understatement of the century!"

"What else do you want from me Brooke?" Nathan questioned, "I've apologized so much, and I've tried."

Brooke crossed her legs and looked at him in disbelief, "So you think that's going to make things all better?"

"Yes," Nathan said, "It should at least…I mean, I told you how stupid of a mistake letting you go was…We kissed."

Brooke put her head down and sighed, "Yeah we did," she said softly and then looked up at Nathan, "And for that moment when we were kissing I thought everything was going to be okay…I thought about us, and about our future…But then I realized that we didn't have a future," she said coldly.

"So do you think you have a future with that Alex guy?" Nathan shot back, "You talk about me treating you like shit?"

Brooke sat up, "That is none of your business first of all!"

"Come on Brooke!" Nathan yelled, "That guy puts you down and you know it…I bet he's still calling you isn't he?"

Brooke pushed Nathan, "You just know everything don't you?" She screamed and then broke down in tears.

"Brooke," Nathan said softly and then put his arms around her, "Baby, I'm sorry…I'm sorry okay?"

"You have to leave," Brooke cried as she broke out of Nathan's grip.

Nathan sighed and looked at Brooke, "I'm sorry Brooke," he said softly and then walked out of her room.

**xxx**

Peyton sat out on the front porch with a bottle of beer in her hand and Jake's letter resting on her lap. Lucas walked out of the house and Peyton put the letter under her chair. Lucas sat down beside her and looked up at the stars, "Are you happy that I moved in with you?" He asked.

Peyton smiled and nodded, "Of course I am…Why?"

"I don't know," Lucas said, "I just…I sometimes think you wish I were Jake."

Peyton looked at him, "Why would you say something like that?"

"Because sometimes I think it's true," Lucas said with a small laugh, "I know you love him," he began.

Peyton stopped him, "But I love you Luke…"

"And I love you too," Lucas said as he rubbed Peyton's knee, "I want you to be happy."

Peyton smiled and put her hand on top of Luke's, "I am happy…I'm happy, being here, with you."

"I love you," Lucas said.

Peyton leaned in and kissed him passionately, "And I love you too," she said and the two of them walked back in the house.

**xxx**

Brooke cried softly in her new room and saw Karen slowly walk into the room. Brooke wiped her eyes quickly and put on a fake smile, "Hi Karen," she said; her voice still raspy from crying.

"Hey," Karen said and then sat down beside Brooke on the bed, "You want to tell me what's up?"

Brooke wiped her eyes and sniffed, "Just boy stuff," she said with a small laugh.

"Nathan?" Karen asked.

"How did you know about us?" Brooke asked.

Karen laughed and rubbed Brooke's back, "I knew about you and Nathan when you guys were all in high school…And I kind of overheard the two of you in here fighting," she said and then looked sympathetically at Brooke, "I've never seen a boy love a girl like Nathan loves you."

"He broke my heart Karen," Brooke said and looked down at the ground as tears rolled down her cheeks, "My life wasn't supposed to be like this…"

Karen sighed, "I know hunny," she said, "But, life is so random…I mean, I never thought that I would get pregnant in high school," Karen began, "And I never thought that I would marry Keith…"

"The thing that kills me is the fact that he picked Haley over me," Brooke said in disbelief, "I would lie in bed and think about what I did wrong to make him choose her over me."

"Haley and Nathan were in love, Brooke," Karen said, "But the way he looks at her, isn't even close to the way he looks at you…With Haley he saw a present, and with you he saw a future," she said and then left Brooke in the room to think by herself.

**xxx**

Brooke walked down to the river court and saw Lucas sitting on the bench; she walked over to him and sat down beside him. He looked over at her and smiled weakly, she smiled back and let out a deep breath, "Who ever thought after six years I'd be in the same damn drama as high school?" Brooke asked.

"You know you missed old Tree Hill," Lucas said as he nudged her a bit.

Brooke laughed, "Maybe a little," she said with a wink, "I am too old for this shit," she said.

"Yeah," Lucas said and handed Brooke the letter from Jake to Peyton, "So am I…"

Brooke opened the letter and read it, "Wow…" She said after she read the whole thing, "Luke."

"She told me that she loved me," Lucas said, "She told me that she only wanted me…"

"Lucas," Brooke began, but then heard footsteps behind her. Brooke turned around and saw Alex standing there with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, "Alex…" She said in almost a whisper.

Alex took a long drag from his cigarette and then put it out, "Is this the friend you so desperately needed to see?" He asked arrogantly.

"No," Brooke said as she got off the bench, "This is another friend…Lucas Scott. Luke this is Alex," she said.

Lucas gave him a head nod, "Hey man…"

"You keep your hands off my god damn girlfriend," Alex said threateningly as he pointed at Lucas.

Brooke looked apologetically at Lucas, "Alex!"

"Brooke and I are friends," Lucas said as he put his hands up in defense.

Alex grabbed Brooke's arm, "I'm taking you home," he said.

Lucas ran over and pushed Alex to the ground, "Man, get your god damn hands off of her!" He said; Alex got up and punched Lucas in the face. Lucas stumbled towards the bench and swung and hit Alex right in the jaw. Alex got on top of Lucas as Brooke screamed for him to get off.

"Hey!" They heard Nathan yell; who was running down to the court to help out his brother. Nathan pulled Alex off of Lucas and punched him square in the face, "Get the fuck out of here!" He yelled.

Alex held his bloody mouth and looked at the three of them. He spit out the blood and staggered back up to his car. Nathan looked at Brooke as he caught his breath, "Who the hell was that?"

"That was Alex," Brooke said apprehensively.

Nathan looked at her in disbelief, "You mean that abusive son of a bitch you broke up with?"

"That would be him," Brooke said with a weak laugh, "I don't know why he's here okay?"

Lucas went over and hugged Brooke; she hugged him back and looked over his shoulder at Nathan who looked like he was mentally scolding himself.

**xxx**

Nathan sat on Karen's porch and waited until Brooke came out. She walked out in her pajamas and sat down on the porch swing beside Nathan, "I expected him to be different," Nathan said finally.

"I know," Brooke said softly as she looked out onto the road.

Nathan sighed, "I really don't like that guy…"

"I knew you wouldn't," Brooke said, "But if I can tell you the truth right now…I'm with him because he's not like you."

Nathan looked at her, "I guess I see where you're coming from," he said, "I never got over you," he said softly.

"What's so important about me?" Brooke asked, "Why can't you just move on?"

Nathan rubbed his temples and looked down at the ground, "I can't stop thinking about you…I can't stop thinking about what a jerk I was to you, and I can't stop thinking about how we could've been more," he began, "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm in love with you."

Brooke rested her hand on Nathan's cheek as her eyes welled up with tears, "If only you could've said this to me six years ago…" She said and then got up and headed towards the door.

"I was 17 years old Brooke," Nathan said as he stood up, "What did you expect from me?"

"A hell of a lot more," Brooke said and then walked inside the house.

Brooke walked into her room and saw Alex sitting on her bed. He looked up at her and closed the door, "What are you trying to pull?" He asked.

"How'd you get in here?" Brooke asked.

"The door," Alex said, "This can't be over," he said and walked over to Brooke and put his arms around her waist, "I love you doll," he said and then handed Brooke a red rose, "I got you this…I know red's your favorite," Alex said and then planted a small kiss on Brooke's lips.

"You're wrong," Brooke said softly as she backed away from Alex.

Alex looked at her in confusion, "What?"

"Red isn't my favorite," she said and then handed the rose to Alex, "Now get the hell out of my life…"

Alex chuckled sarcastically to himself, "You're making a big mistake little girl," he said.

"The only mistake I ever made was getting involved with a creep like you," Brooke said and then crossed her arms, "Now get the fuck out."

Alex walked out of the room and slammed the door on his way out. Brooke closed her eyes slowly and let out a breath. She turned around and saw Nathan standing there, "What are you doing here?" Brooke asked.

"I got you something," Nathan said and handed Brooke a white rose, "I know they're your favorite," he said and then walked away.

Brooke smelled the rose and touched its petals softly; she looked at the space where Nathan was occupying. Brooke sat on her bed and put the rose near her heart.

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	5. My Hopes Are So High

**The Bitter Taste**

**My Hopes Are So High…**

Brooke sat outside on the river court with a half empty bottle of wine in her hand, and a guitar lying down beside her. Brooke sighed thoughtfully and leaned back on the blanket that she had brought. The rose laid beside her face; almost mocking her. Nathan wasn't giving up, and Brooke didn't know why it was so hard for her to let him in again. Everything was so hard for her lately; ever since she'd been back all she did was cry and drink.

Alex coming to Tree Hill was a rude reality check, Brooke thought to herself. Out of all the people she loved, Brooke knew that Alex was a person she was using. She was using him because in her eyes she needed someone. Brooke didn't need love and respect, she just wanted to feel the attention, and that's exactly what Alex gave her.

Nathan; Brooke took another sip from the bottle of wine and watched her breath evaporate into the air. Brooke never thought she could love again after Lucas, but then she found Felix. Felix was a guy that she thought was the one for her, but again Brooke was wrong. After the Felix incident she looked to Nathan for comfort. Haley left, and it seemed like her and Nathan were the only two who could be there for each other.

Brooke smiled as she thought about their first kiss, their first fight, and their first time being intimate with each other. It was beautiful, Brooke remembered; the apartment was dimmed, and beautiful white roses were scattered everywhere around the apartment. The wine went down smooth as Brooke felt the tears swell up in her eyes as she thought about the night that had changed her life forever, or so she thought. Nathan carried her into the bedroom and told her that he loved her. They kissed, and Brooke couldn't think of a time that she felt more alive.

She went to wipe her eyes, but stopped herself. It was time for her to have at least one good cry. Brooke took another sip of the wine and sat up; she felt dizzy and laid back down. Brooke closed her eyes and then opened them just to see Haley standing over her.

"This is really not a good time," Brooke said as she closed her eyes once more.

Haley sighed, "Lucas called me," she began, "He said that there was trouble between you and Nathan."

"All thanks to you," Brooke said as she started to get up.

Haley crossed her arms and rubbed her arms, "I know how much Nathan loves you, and I know how much you love him," Haley began, "I want to help make this right."

Brooke laughed sarcastically, "So you're playing the peace maker ex wife today?" She asked, "Let me play…The bitter ex who hates your fucking guts," Brooke said coldly and then took another drink.

"Hate me all you want, but don't take your anger out on Nate," Haley said, "He chose me because I made him believe that I made a mistake about the whole Chris thing…I was wrong."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "I guess that makes two of us," she said and then stumbled towards the bench, "I have every right to be mad at Nathan!"

"Nathan's in love with you!" Haley exclaimed, "God dammit Brooke open your eyes!"

"They are open," Brooke said as she sat down on the bench, "They've been open for the last six years of my life!"

Haley walked over towards Brooke, "Don't make the same mistake I did…"

"I'm not going to," Brooke said, "That's why I'm not getting involved with him anymore," she said and then finished off the wine, "Cheers to you Haley James," Brooke said sarcastically. Haley sighed and walked back towards her car while Brooke looked down at the ground and cried.

**xxx**

Lucas walked out onto the porch and saw Brooke standing there with her hair in a tangle, and her face red, "Brooke," Lucas said, "Is everything okay?" He asked.

"Why did you call her?" Brooke asked.

Lucas looked at her, "You mean Haley?"

"She's not going to make things better," Brooke said, "You saw what happened _last_ time she came back."

Lucas sighed and sat down beside Brooke, "She doesn't love Nathan like you do…"

"Like I do?" Brooke spat, "What the hell do you know about love, Luke?"

Lucas stood up and smacked his hand against the door, "What the hell do _you_ know about love?" He shot back, "Not much, since your last boyfriend was a complete stoner!"

"Fuck you!" Brooke screamed and then went to walk away.

Lucas grabbed Brooke's arm and let out an exasperated breath, "I'm sorry," he said softly.

Brooke stopped and turned towards Lucas, "I was hurt Lucas…I was hurt by you, I was hurt by Felix, and I was hurt by Nathan," she said softly, "I sure as hell know a couple things about love, and every time I love somebody it always ends in heartbreak…"

"Look at this," Lucas said as he handed Brooke an envelope.

Brooke looked at Lucas in confusion, "What's this?"

"Read it," Lucas said, "It's a letter from Jake to Peyton," he said and then sat down on the porch.

Brooke opened the letter and began to read:

_Peyton,_

_Jenny's doing fine, and so am I. I miss you so much Peyton you have no idea. I think about you every single day, and every single minute. I saw a painting today that reminded me of you. It was beautiful, just like you, and it was done with such excellence. I'm sorry that I had to leave, but the last thing I would ever want to do is put you in any danger. The truth it, I'm in love with you Peyton, and I wish that I would've proposed to you earlier instead of the day before I left. I know that the proposal was a heavy thing for you to handle, so don't apologize for postponing it. I love you Peyton, more than you'll ever know. Take care, Jenny sends her love._

_Jake_

Brooke finished the letter and looked up at Lucas, "When did you find this?" She asked her voice returning to normal.

"The other day," Lucas answered, "On Peyton's dresser…She wants to be with him, and not with me."

Brooke sat down beside Lucas and rested her hand on his knee, "That's not true Luke, Peyton loves you."

"It's in the letter Brooke," Lucas said as he pointed to the letter in her hand, "How can I love somebody who's in love with someone else?"

Brooke looked sympathetically at Lucas and sighed, "I don't know," she said softly.

"This whole time…" Lucas began, "I always thought it was about me not loving Peyton enough, so I always tried to love me for the both of us," he said and then put his head in his hands.

Brooke got up, "Talk to her," she said and then walked down the porch steps.

**xxx**

There was a knock at Nathan's door and he answered it. Haley stood there and looked up at him, "Hey Nathan," she said with a nervous smile.

"Long time no see," Nathan said as Haley walked into the apartment.

"Yeah," Haley said, "After the divorce Chris and I decided to move to New York," she began.

Nathan crossed his arms and leaned against a wall, "Are you two married?" He asked.

"We're engaged," Haley said as she looked away from Nathan, "But I didn't come here to talk to you about me…"

Nathan looked at her, "Then why are you here?"

"I came to talk to you about Brooke," Haley began, "I already talked to her last night, and she wasn't too happy to see me…"

"Yeah," Nathan said, "She hates me too…"

Haley sighed, "I know that I messed things up between the two of you because I took advantage of your love for me," she said.

"I made a mistake," Nathan said, "I shouldn't have believed you when you said that you were back for good…"

Haley bit her top lip and ran her hand through her hair, "I'm sorry Nathan, but you and I…"

"This isn't about us," Nathan butted in, "This about me and Brooke…"

Haley nodded her head, "Right," she said, "Just…You love her Nathan I know you do," she said, "Don't do anything stupid."

"Is that all?" Nathan asked.

Haley nodded, "The wedding's in two months…"

Nathan laughed and looked at Haley like she was crazy, "Yeah right Hales," he said and then shook his head.

Haley smiled weakly, "Ex husband and new husband don't get along," she registered, "I was just trying to be…Polite," she said and then walked towards the door, "It was nice to see you."

"Good luck with Chris," Nathan said, "I'm sure you two will be very happy," he said with a hint of sarcasm. Haley nodded and walked out of the apartment.

**xxx**

Peyton walked into her house and saw Lucas sitting at the kitchen table with a white envelope in his hands. Peyton smiled at him, "Hey," she said, "What's that?" She asked, referring to the envelope.

"The letter from Jake," Lucas said as he watched Peyton's smile fall, "I don't think I can do this anymore…"

Peyton rubbed her temples, "First off," she said, "What the hell are you doing in my stuff?" She yelled, "And second off, what can't you do anymore?"

"I knew there was something," Lucas said, "You wish I were Jake!"

"That's not even close to the truth," Peyton cried, "God Lucas, stop being so jealous!"

Lucas scoffed, "I'm sorry Peyton, but it kind of sucks when you find out your girlfriend was set to get married to someone else!"

"I said no!" Peyton yelled.

"Because he was leaving," Lucas pointed out, "I'm never going to be Jake for you, and as long as I'm here the only thing in the back of my head is the fact that every time you're kissing me, and every time you're with me you're wishing that I'm Jake…And that freakin' sucks Pey!"

Lucas got up and walked towards the front door, Peyton followed him, "That's not fair Luke!" Peyton said, "You don't even know how I feel about this situation!"

"I know that you love him," Lucas said.

Peyton sighed, "Yeah I do love him," she said, "But I love you too, and I'll always love you."

"Only when it's convenient," Lucas said sarcastically and then turned back towards the door.

Peyton pushed him, "How dare you say that!" She screamed, "I expected you to act more mature than this!"

"And I expected you to be my girlfriend," Lucas said, "Not some lovesick puppy, who might I add is in love with someone else!"

Peyton stepped back and wiped her eyes, "Then leave," she said and looked away from him.

Lucas looked at her once more and walked out of the door; slamming it on the way out.

**xxx**

Nathan walked into Brooke's room and saw her lying on the bed with an ice pack on her head, "Hang over?" He asked.

"Yeah," Brooke said weakly and then sat up, "If I weren't so hung over I'd probably tell you to leave…Just to let you know."

Nathan shrugged, "And if I weren't so guilty I probably wouldn't be here…"

"Did Haley come and talk to you?" Brooke asked apprehensively.

"Yeah," Nathan said as he rolled his eyes.

Brooke chuckled, "Did she sweep you off your feet again?" She asked sarcastically, "Are you guys having another wedding?"

"No," Nathan said as he watched Brooke walked over to the window, "This bitterness is really getting old Brooke."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "It gets easier with practice," she said.

"Why are we still playing this game?" Nathan asked, "I've apologized for everything…"

Brooke looked at him and crossed her arms, "The game started the day you told me that you loved me," she said, "So if you want to talk about games look to yourself!"

"Fine," Nathan said, "Then I guess we shouldn't be together," he said and then headed towards the door.

Brooke looked down at the ground, "You're giving up on me that easily?" She asked sadly.

"You gave up on _me_ Brooke," Nathan said and then walked out of the house.

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	6. The If, Ands, and Buts

**The Bitter Taste**

**The If, Ands, and Buts**

**xxx**

Brooke sat down at her desk in her new room, and had a pen and pad in front of her. It had been a long time since she'd written a song, and she was in the mood. Brooke sighed and poured herself a glass of wine; always a good inspiration for song writing, she thought to herself.

_I can remember  
__The very first time I cried  
__How I wiped my eyes  
__And buried the pain inside  
__All of my memories  
__Good and bad that's passed  
__Didn't even take the time to realize_

She sang the lyrics out loud and smiled to herself; Brooke wrote them down and leaned back in her chair. She looked up at the ceiling and closed her eyes.

_Staring at the cracks in the walls  
__'Cause I'm waiting for it all  
__to come to an end  
__Still I curl up right under the bed  
__'Cause it's takin' over my head  
__All over again_

Brooke took another sip of her wine and scribbled down the lyrics on her pink notepad. It was the first thing she bought when she started recording her album. At least a dozen songs were written in there, all of them about heartbreak.

_Do you even know who you are?  
__I guess I'm trying to find  
__A borrowed dream or a superstar?  
__I want to be a star  
__Is life good to you, or is it bad?  
__I can't tell anymore  
__Do you even know what you have?_

Brooke heard a knock on the door and she looked over to see Peyton standing there. Brooke put away her notebook and turned her chair around, "Come on in," she said with a warm smile.

"Thanks," Peyton said as she sat down on Brooke's bed, "You have another glass?" She asked pointing to the wine.

Brooke nodded and poured Peyton a glass of wine and handed it to her, "What's up?" She asked.

"Lucas and I are having some troubles," Peyton said as she took a big gulp from the glass.

"You mean about the letter from Jake?" Brooke asked.

Peyton looked at her in confusion, "How did you know about that?"

"Lucas showed me," she said, "I went over to your house to bitch at him for calling Haley, and we kind of fought and he showed me the letter…"

"Oh," Peyton said and then looked down at the ground, "I really am in love with Lucas…"

"I know," Brooke said softly and then sat down beside Peyton, "You guys are in love…You'll overcome this."

Peyton slowly began to cry, "I don't know if we will," she sobbed, "I was so close to marrying Jake…"

"If you're in love with Jake then why are you with Lucas?" Brooke asked.

"Because I'm in love with Lucas too," Peyton said as she wiped her eyes with her sleeve, "It just sucks…These guys are the two most important people to me, and I love them both."

Brooke sighed, "Remember when Lucas cheated on us?" She asked.

"Yeah," Peyton nodded.

"He loved us both," Brooke said, "It just never works out…"

Peyton's lip quivered, "Either way someone gets hurt," she said sadly.

**xxx**

Nathan walked along the beach and kicked the sand up. He was so stupid; all he could think about was how much he had hurt the only person that he loved, and that had actually loved him back.

He sat down on the beach and watched the waves crash into each other; he just wanted to lay back and die. Nathan laid back and closed his eyes; he heard somebody sit down beside him.

Nathan opened his eyes and saw Brooke sitting beside him; her hair was blowing back and he couldn't think of a time when she looked more beautiful.

"Do you ever think about what we'd be doing right now if six years ago I would've been the one you chose?" Brooke asked suddenly and then looked down at Nathan.

Nathan nodded, "Everyday," he said truthfully, "I always wonder if we would've gotten married, or if we would have drifted apart…"

"I need you Nathan," Brooke said and then let out a breath, "I've been trying all this time to make it seem like I didn't need you, but the truth is…I've never fallen so hard."

Nathan sat up completely and looked into Brooke's eyes, "I am in love with you Brooke," he said and placed his hand on Brooke's cheek, "I just want to be with you…"

"I'm so scared Nathan," Brooke said as she began to cry, "I've never cared about someone this much, and being here with you right now is like a dream…This almost seems like it's not real, like in the morning none of this—"

Nathan kissed Brooke passionately; he rested his hand on Brooke's thigh as she ran her fingers through Nathan's brown hair. Nathan lifted Brooke's shirt off as she started to unbutton his pants. They stopped kissing and Nathan took off his shirt; they stared at each other as they tried to catch their breath. Brooke smiled and brought Nathan closer to her; they kissed again as Nathan unbuttoned Brooke's pants.

**xxx**

Peyton pulled into the driveway and saw Lucas loading his bags in the back of his truck. Peyton got out of her car and stormed over to him, "What are you doing?" She asked.

Lucas sighed and turned to face her, "This isn't fair to you, and this isn't fair to me…"

"Don't leave me Luke," Peyton pleaded as she began to cry, "We can work this out…Please."

Lucas shook his head and placed his hand on Peyton's cheek and tenderly wiped a tear away, "I can't stop you from loving Jake, that wouldn't be fair to you," he said softly, "Hell, it isn't fair to me to watch somebody I love, love somebody else…"

"I've never stopped loving you," Peyton said sadly and then looked away.

Lucas smiled sadly and kissed Peyton on the cheek, "I love you Pey," he said and got into his car. Peyton watched as he drove off; Peyton turned and walked into the house, and for once her life not having somebody there to hold her and tell her everything was okay.

**xxx**

_**What day is it **_

_**And in what month **_

_**This clock never seemed so alive **_

_**I can't keep up and I can't back down **_

_**I've been losing so much time** _

Brooke felt the sun beaming down on her; she opened her eyes and looked beside her to see an empty spot beside her. Brooke sat up quickly and looked around for Nathan. She got up and walked alongside the beach.

_**Cause it's you and me and all of the people **_

_**Nothing to do, nothing to lose **_

_**And it's you and me and all of the people and **_

_**I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of you** _

She saw Nathan sitting on a rock looking out onto the water; he looked over at Brooke and smiled. Brooke ran over to him and sat down beside him. She let the sun beat down on her; she looked over at Nathan and rested her head on his shoulder.

_**All of the things that I want to say **_

_**Just aren't coming out right **_

_**I'm tripping on words, you got my head spinning **_

_**I don't know where to go from here** _

"This feels right," Brooke said; her voice raspy but sexy. Nathan looked down at her and they kissed softly.

Nathan put his arm around Brooke and let her lean on his chest, "I love you…"

"I love you too," Brooke said and the two of them kissed passionately.

_**Cause it's you and me and all of the people **_

_**With nothing to do, nothing to prove **_

_**And it's you and me and all of the people and **_

_**I don't why I can't keep my eyes off you**_

Brooke drove home after Nathan had made her breakfast; she smiled the whole way home. Brooke walked into her room and saw Lucas sitting on her bed, "Lucas?" She asked.

"I'm sorry," Lucas said as he stood up, "I just kind of needed someone to talk to…"

Brooke put her hand on his shoulder, "No, no…It's fine, what's wrong?" She asked as the two of them sat down on her bed.

"I moved out of Peyton's house," Lucas said as he looked down at the ground.

Brooke looked at him sympathetically, "I'm sorry Luke," she said sincerely, "Peyton's my best friend…And I know this is hard for you right now, but I know you two will work it out."

"No," Lucas said, "We won't work it out…She wants to be with Jake, so I'm going to let her be with Jake."

Brooke put her hand on Lucas's shoulder, "Lucas…"

_**Something about you now **_

_**I can't quite figure out **_

_**Everything she does is beautiful **_

_**Everything she does is right**_

"I finally figured out what you and Peyton had to go through," Lucas said as he looked up at Brooke, "And now I know what you're going through with this whole Nathan thing…"

Brooke nodded, "Actually Nathan and I are…We're back together," she said with a small smile.

"I'm glad," Lucas said and smiled back at Brooke, "That's really good," he said and got up from the bed.

_**Cause it's you and me and all of the people **_

_**With nothing to do, nothing to lose **_

_**And it's you and me and all of the people and **_

_**I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of**_

Brooke stuck her hands in her pockets, "Are you going to be okay?' She asked.

"Yeah," Lucas said as he opened the door, "I'll talk to you later okay?"

**xxx**

Nathan sat in his apartment as he thought about his night with Brooke; it was something that he had wanted for all the six years of his life without her. He laid back on the couch and closed his eyes as he thought about Brooke, and how much he really did care about her. Nathan heard a knock on his door, he answered the door and saw Brooke standing there crying.

_**You and me and all of the people **_

_**With nothing to do nothin to prove and **_

_**It's you and me and all of the people and **_

_**I don't why I can't keep my eyes off of you**_

"Brooke," Nathan said in concern as he put his arms around her and hugged her, "Are you okay?

Brooke wiped her eyes, "It's my mom…She's in the hospital," Brooke said sadly, "I need to go back to New York to see her."

"I'm coming with you," Nathan said.

Brooke smiled sadly, "You don't have to do this Nate," she said.

"I want to Brooke," Nathan said as the two of them walked back in his room, "When do we have to leave?" He asked as he began to pack.

Brooke leaned against the doorframe, "Tonight," she said.

_**What day is it **_

_**And in what month **_

_**This clock never seemed so alive**_

**Read and Review.**


	7. The Big Picture

**The Bitter Taste**

**The Big Picture**

**--Thanks for all the reviews! You guys are great!**

**xxx**

"This is so typical," Brooke said as her and Nathan drove down the highway, "Something good happens in my life, and then it has to be followed by something bad."

Nathan held Brooke's hand, "What's wrong with your mom?"

"I think it's cancer," Brooke said as she wiped her eyes, "But my dad says he isn't sure…He said that something is just eating away at her."

Nathan wiped away one of Brooke's tears, "You should get some rest," he said as he turned down the radio.

"No I'm fine," Brooke said as she sniffed softly, "I want to be with you," she said as she kissed Nathan's hand, "Thank you…For all of this."

Nathan smiled at her, "I love you Brooke," he said, "And I'm going to be here for you."

"I never expected myself to care," Brooke said softly, "My parents were never there for me when I was younger…They were always out drinking and partying, they didn't care. And here I am now crying because I think my mom is going to die," she said sadly, "I just wish…I wish that I would've had parents you know?"

Nathan stroked Brooke's cheek, "I know what you mean," he said and then turned back towards the road. Brooke watched as he looked onto the road; realizing that her and Nathan had a lot more in common then she had ever realized.

**xxx**

Lucas sat at the bar and took a sip from his beer; he looked around at all the people laughing and talking. It seemed like everyone was mocking him at the bar; they all were in couples; all in love.

Lucas looked across the bar and saw a girl giving him looks; Lucas smiled at her as the bartender set another beer in front of him, "I didn't order this," Lucas said to the bartender.

"The lady over there got it for you," the bartender said, pointing to the girl that Lucas had been looking at.

Lucas raised his eyebrows and walked over towards her, "Thanks for the beer," he said, "I'm Lucas…"

"You are?" The girl asked, "What brings you to a bar on such a lovely night…Without a date?"

Lucas sat down beside her and sighed, "My girlfriend and I broke up…We kind of had a little disagreement about one of her ex's."

"Ouch," the girl said, "So what are you doing now? Hoping to get some ass at a bar from a pure, innocent little girl like me?" She teased.

Lucas laughed, "I'm here doing what you're doing…Drinking alone," he said, "What's your name?"

"Buy me a drink and maybe I'll tell you," the girl said with a seductive smile.

**xxx**

Brooke woke up when heard the car door open; she opened her eyes and saw Nathan pulling back from kissing her on the forehead, "Hey beautiful," he said as he stroked her cheek.

"I probably look like hell," she said with a small laugh, and then kissed him passionately on the lips.

Nathan shook his head, "We're at the hotel," he said, "We can get all cleaned up and then go to the hospital to see your mom…"

The two of them walked into the room and Brooke laid down on the king sized bed they had gotten; she smiled up at Nathan and ran her fingers through her hair, "Are you trying to seduce me Miss. Davis?" Nathan asked.

"Maybe," Brooke said as she got up from the bed and kissed Nathan up against a wall, "Besides," she whispered, "We both know that you took advantage of me while I was sleeping," Brooke teased.

Nathan laughed, "You are a heavy sleeper," he said and then kissed Brooke softly on the lips.

"I cannot wait till tonight," she said as she poked him in the ribs, "I am going to take so much advantage of you."

Nathan led Brooke over towards the bed and got on top of her and kissed her neck, "I can't wait," he whispered in her ear.

Brooke looked at the clock and sat up, "We should get ready," she said as she got up from the bed.

"Your right," Nathan said and gave Brooke one last kiss on the lips.

**xxx**

The girl took Lucas's hand after the two of them had had their fair share of drinks, "I'm Anna by the way," she said with a giggle and then took Lucas outside.

Anna leaned against her car and put Lucas's hand up her shirt, "Should we be doing this here?" Lucas asked.

"Do you have somewhere else that we can go?" Anna asked as she nibbled on Lucas's bottom lip.

Lucas nodded and the two of them got into his car and drove to his house. Anna walked into his room and giggled, "I know this room is kind of girly," Lucas said.

"Kind of?" Anna asked, "That's the understatement of the century," she said.

Lucas put his arms around Anna, "This girl is staying here, she moved away six years ago and she came back because she needed to see my other friend…And she's living here so," Anna cut him off as she kissed him hard.

"Is anybody home?" Anna asked as she unzipped his pants.

"No," Lucas said in between breaths as he took off his own shirt, and then Anna's. His phone started ringing and he turned it off and threw it to the side.

**xxx**

Peyton hung up and dialed Lucas's cell phone number again; she got his voice mail and took a deep breath, "Hey Lucas it's me…Um, I just called because I thought we should talk. I don't want you to leave, and I'm sorry about the letters to Jake and the letters from Jake, but you have to understand that the whole proposal thing was before us…I feel dumb for leaving this on your voice mail, but you haven't been picking up your phone. I love you Lucas, come home…" Peyton hung up the phone and laid back on her bed.

She closed her eyes and then heard someone say her name. Peyton looked over towards her door and saw Jake standing there. Peyton's eyes began to well up with tears and she ran over and hugged him, "Jake," she whispered as he rubbed her back.

**xxx**

Brooke walked out of her mother's hospital room and walked over to Nathan; she collapsed into his arms and cried.

"Shh baby," Nathan said as he comforted Brooke. The two of them walked outside and got into Nathan's car; Brooke looked out the window and wiped her eyes every two seconds, "Are you going to be okay?" He asked.

Brooke closed her eyes and looked down at her trembling hands, "She's dying Nathan," she said; her voice soft and raspy, "She's dying and I can't do anything about it…"

"Brooke…" Nathan said softly as he rested his hand on her knee. They got back to the hotel and Nathan held Brooke in his arms the whole way there.

The two of them walked into their hotel rooms and saw a blonde girl sitting in the chair; Brooke's jaw dropped, "Lilly?" She asked and then the two girls hugged each other.

"Where have you been?" Lilly asked, and then looked at Nathan, "Hello."

Nathan said hello and Brooke sighed, "I had to go back to Tree Hill, Nathan got into an accident and I had to see him," she said and held Nathan's hand.

"I see," Lilly said, "I heard about your mom…I'm so sorry," she said sincerely, "But…The reason I'm here is because Alex kind of booked you a show tonight," she said, "I'm sorry."

Brooke groaned, "That fucking ass," she yelled and then turned to Nathan, "I don't want to get involved with this Alex thing again, and music is the only way that he tries to win me back…"

"I want to hear your sing," Nathan said, "It's your passion, so sing."

Nathan and Lilly sat backstage while Brooke walked onto stage and sat on a stool, "She loves singing," Lilly said to end the silence, "Are you two dating now?"

"Yeah," Nathan said confidently, "I'm in love with her…"

Lilly smiled, "I remember hearing about you," she said, "Brooke has always loved you…She would cry herself before some shows because all of her songs are about you."

_I love you more than I should  
__so much more than is good for me  
__more than is good oh the timing is cruel  
__oh I need and don't want to need more than I should.  
__I am falling say my name and i'll lie in the sound  
__what is love but whatever my heart needs around._

Brooke looked over at Nathan and the two smiled at each other. Alex walked over to Nathan and snorted, "You're still her little whipped bitch?" He asked.

"What the hell man?" Nathan said as he turned around and eyed Alex, "Why don't you just fuck off, Brooke's over you."

Alex laughed sarcastically, "Why don't you ask Brooke about we almost got married?" He asked, "I would've had that ass all night long!"

Nathan punched Alex in the face and the two of them fought to the ground; Nathan obviously having the upper hand. The bouncer threw both of them out of the club while they continued to fight.

Brooke ran out as the bouncers were pulling Nathan off of Alex, "Nathan!" Brooke yelled as she ran over to him and touched the cut on his lip, "Baby what's wrong?"

"Why don't you ask your husband?" He spat, "Since you two were going to get married, and you never bothered to tell me!"

Brooke glared at Alex and then looked back at Nathan, "That was when we weren't speaking Nate! I didn't think it mattered!"

"It did matter," Nathan said, "It mattered to me!"

Brooke scoffed, "You're overreacting Nate!"

"It's hard enough seeing you in bed with this guy," he said, "But knowing that you two were going to get married!"

Brooke pushed Nathan away from her, "That's what I think every time I see you…All I can think about is Haley!"

"God look at us! We're fighting!" Nathan said and then put his hands on his head.

Brooke bit her bottom lip and looked down at the ground as everyone let the two have their space, "A lot is going on with my mom right now," she said softly, "I think I'm just going to stay in New York for a while…"

"Brooke," Nathan pleaded, "I'm sorry okay? Just let me stay with you, let me help…"

"Please," Brooke said softly, "Don't make this any harder then it is," she said and then walked back inside.

Lilly watched on and walked up to Nathan, "So your just going to let her walk away like that?" She asked.

"I don't have a choice," he said.

Lilly sighed, "You don't remember me do you?" She asked.

"Can't say I do," Nathan said with a shrug, "I'm sorry…"

"We were both pretty drunk that night," she said and then looked down at the ground, "I'm Lisa Sanders…Lilly for short," she said with a small giggle, "You were a freshman, I was a senior…We were at your beach house and thinks got out of hand," she said with a small smile.

Nathan looked her up and down, "Oh…Lilly," he said, "It was so long ago I almost forgot…How are you?" He asked.

"I'm good," she said, "Brooke will be okay…She just needs some time right now."

Nathan sighed, "I wasted six years of my life giving her time…I can't stand being without her."

"Then do something about it," Lilly said and then walked away.

**xxx**

"You're here," Peyton said as she began to cry, "I can't believe you're really here…"

Jake kissed Peyton on the forehead and brushed the hair out of her face, "It's so good to see you," he said in almost a whisper.

"Just touch me," Peyton said as they laid down on the bed, "I want you…"

Jake shook his head, but still had his hands on Peyton, "I'm getting married," he said.

Peyton's eyes opened wide and she bit her lip, "Don't tell me that," she said softly, "Just…Just be inside of me tonight," she said and they began to kiss passionately.

**Read and Review.**


	8. Love Is Like A Role That We Play

**The Bitter Taste**

**Love Is Like A Role That We Play**

**--Thanks for all the reviews! You guys are the greatest people ever!**

**xxx**

Brooke sat at the bar and picked up her glass; she let out a deep breath and stirred her drink around a bit. A guy with long, blonde hair sat next to her and smiled drunkenly. Brooke let out a dry laugh and rolled her eyes, "No," she said and then watched as the guy got up and walked away.

Alex sat down beside Brooke and set his elbows on the table, "Two beers," he said to the bartender and then looked at Brooke, "I knew you'd come back…"

"Why did you tell Nathan about the engagement?" Brooke asked as she took a sip of her drink.

Alex grabbed his beer and laughed bitterly, "Thought he needed to know the truth," he said and then took a sip from his drink, "You dumped me for that guy?" He spat, "I took you in when you had nobody else this guy fucked you over for his wife."

"Shut up," Brooke said harshly, "You don't know anything about Nathan, or about our relationship!"

"All I know is that that he made you run away," Alex said, "He broke your heart, and now your back to square one…You're sitting in a bar waiting for some guy to take you in. Well, here I am baby," Alex said as he stood up and put his arms out, "Let's go home…We'll rent a movie, eat some popcorn, the things we used to do."

Brooke scoffed, "I don't know what the fuck you're on, but we never watched movies, or ate popcorn. It was always about getting drunk or high, and then having sex," she said.

"You never complained," Alex shot back, "Brooke you needed me because I was the only guy who wanted you," he said coldly, "Look at you! You're just some washed up high school cheerleader who lets people walk all over her!"

Brooke grabbed her beer and threw it in Alex's face, "You're pathetic," she said and then barged outside of the bar.

"Brooke," Alex screamed as he walked out to the parking lot after her; he grabbed her arm and pulled her back towards him, "You'll be fucking nothing without me."

Brooke tried to pull her arm away, but Alex's grip was too strong, "Get your goddamn hands off of me!" She yelled.

"Shut up," Alex whispered in her ear and then grabbed her face, "Now you listen to me, and you listen good…You're back in my world now so we're going to pretend that you never went to Tree Hill because I am in love with you Brooke…I love you."

Brooke's jaw felt numb, and she got that feeling her stomach that she was going to die; she always got that feeling when she was around Alex. He told Brooke that he loved her, but he said it with such a psychotic tone that Brooke would almost shake in fear. A tear fell down Brooke's cheek and she found the strength to speak, "You don't love me," she said almost choking on her tears, "You've never known what love is…Alex you need help, and I never want to see you again," Brooke said and then pushed him away causing him to fall like a drunken fool.

Brooke got in her car and drove to the hospital; she walked into her mother's room and saw her father asleep on a chair, and her mother lying in bed.

Brooke sat down beside her mother's bedside and grasped onto her hand, "Mommy," she said as more tears filled her eyes, "I know that you were never around, and I know that I wasn't the perfect daughter, but you have to understand that I do love you…" Brooke wiped her eyes and bit her quivering lip, "It feels like I don't even know you and you're my mom…I love you, I love you a lot…"

"I love you too," Brooke mom, Mary, said as she squeezed Brooke's hand and opened her eyes, "I've always loved you hunny…"

Brooke kissed her mother's cheek, "I thought you were sleeping," she said with a small smile.

"I was resting," Mary said as she stroked Brooke's cheek, "You need to go get Nathan baby…"

"What?" Brooke said in confusion, "How did you…?"

"He came to see me," Mary said as she took a sip of water, "He seemed so depressed hun, so I asked him what was wrong and he told me…Nathan really loves you Brooke," she said.

"I can't leave you here," Brooke said.

Mary sighed, "I'll be fine Brookie…Just go," she said with a smile, "Go on, you're too young and pretty to let this one go," she said with a wink.

"I love you mom," Brooke said as she stood at the door, "I really do…"

Mary smiled, "I know baby, I love you too," she said. Brooke and her mother shared one last look, and Brooke ran out of the hospital.

**xxx**

Lucas woke up and saw Anna putting on her jeans, "Hey," he said; his voice hoarse, "Where are you going?"

Anna smiled at him, "I've got to go," she said and then gave Lucas a kiss.

"Come on," Lucas said as he put his arms around Anna's waist and pulled her towards him, "Stay for a little bit longer," he sighed.

Anna ran her fingers down his bare chest and kissed him passionately, "I wish I could, but I really have to go…" She said and then got up from the bed.

"When can I see you again?" Lucas asked as he sat up, "I really, really want to see you again…"

Anna sighed and gave him a piece of paper, "That's my cell number," she said and then kissed Lucas one last time on the cheek, "I'll talk to you later stud," Anna said with a wink and then left the room.

**xxx**

Peyton leaned against the bed frame and played with the curls of her hair; she looked over at Jake who was looking up at the ceiling. They had been like this for at least an hour or so, in complete silence.

Peyton sighed and bit her top lip, "Why would you come back to tell me you were getting married?" She asked finally.

"I thought you should know," Jake said with a shrug.

"You could've just written it in a letter," she said smugly, "I mean; we probably wouldn't have ended up having sex right?"

"Right," Jake said regretfully, "Peyton, you know that I love you…But I found someone else, and last night was just…"

Peyton brought her knees up to her chin, "I get it," she said, "I just needed you to be with me again Jake…Last night was just something that I've been missing for awhile."

"Peyton I'm sorry," Jake said sincerely, and then got up from the bed, "I've got to go…" He said as he put on his shirt, "Can I call you later?"

Peyton wiped a tear from her cheek and nodded; "Yeah sure," she said and looked away from him.

"Peyton…" Jake said apologetically.

"It's fine Jake," Peyton said as she looked up at him and gave him a fake smile, "Really!"

Jake nodded and walked out of Peyton's room; Peyton curled up in a ball and turned on the radio. She wiped her eyes quickly and then got out of bed.

**xxx**

Brooke knocked on Nathan's front door, and rubbed her arms while she waited. Nathan answered the door and Brooke could see the hurt in his eyes, "What are you doing here Brooke?" He asked.

"My mom told me that you went and saw her," Brooke began, "I know I should've told you about mine and Alex's engagement, but I was so scared because I didn't want to bring back the past…"

Nathan sighed and looked down at the ground, "Looks like the past already caught up with us," he said as Brooke looked at him in confusion.

"What are you talking about?" Brooke asked. Nathan opened the door wider and Brooke saw Lilly standing there with a little girl on her right side, "What the hell is this?" Brooke asked.

Nathan looked at Lilly and then back at Brooke, "Lilly and I hooked up when I was a freshman…Well, she got pregnant and she thinks the baby is mine…"

"What?" Brooke said, "How can this be?"

Lilly shrugged, "I didn't know Nathan was the guy you were talking about, until I saw him that one night…"

"I can't believe this," Brooke said as she backed away and walked towards the parking lot.

Nathan followed her and grabbed her arm, "Brooke," he said.

"What are you going to do?" Brooke asked; not looking him in the eye.

Nathan shrugged, "Take care of my kid I guess…"

"Do you know for sure if it's yours?" Brooke questioned.

"We're getting the test done in two days," Nathan said, "Until then, I'm the dad…"

Brooke looked down and then back up at Nathan, "I came back for you because I don't want things to be over between us, but…I don't want to make things harder for you."

"I know this is hard for you," Nathan said, "But I want you in my life…And if this baby is mine I still want you in my life."

Brooke nodded and refused to look at Nathan, "Okay," she said in a scratchy voice.

Nathan lifted her head up with his two fingers, "I wish I could give you everything you want Brooke, but I can't."

"All I ask for is your heart," Brooke said and then kissed Nathan's hand, "I'll be at Karen's," she said and then walked to her car.

**Read and Review.**


	9. Who’s To Say?

**The Bitter Taste**

**Who's To Say?**

**xxx**

Peyton walked into Brooke's room and sat down on the bed beside her while Brooke scribbled away in her notebook, "What are you doing?" Peyton asked as she looked down at the notebook.

"I'm singing tonight at this club TRIC," Brooke said, "It's over 21, and I guess Karen has something to do with it?" She said. Peyton laughed to herself, and Brooke looked at her in confusion, "What?"

"I keep forgetting that you've been gone for six years," Peyton said, "Karen and I started that club a couple months after you left…It used to be an all ages, but now since we're all in our 20's we changed it."

Brooke laughed at herself and sighed, "I really have missed a lot," she said regretfully, and then ran her fingers through her hair, "I'm sorry that we haven't talked lately…I've just had so much shit to deal with it's not even funny."

"It's cool," Peyton said reassuringly, "Is everything okay?"

Brooke shrugged and tapped the pencil lightly against her knee, "I guess Nathan got this girl Lilly, who happens to be one of my good friends from New York, pregnant a while back when he was a freshman and she was a senior from some other school," Brooke let out a dry laugh, "Could my life be any worse?"

"I' slept with a married man," Peyton said softly and then looked down at the ground.

Brooke looked at her in confusion, "Pey, what are you talking about, who?"

"Jake," Peyton said as she started to cry, "He came back to tell me that he was engaged, and I don't know…I told him that I needed him so we slept together…"

"Peyton," Brooke said sympathetically as she stroked her friends wet cheek, "I'm so sorry that I haven't been here for you lately…I've been so selfish and—"

Peyton shook her head and wiped her eyes, "You have way too much to worry about right now Brooke…With Nathan and this girl and her kid…Do you know if it's her kid or not?"

"They're getting the test done today," Brooke said apprehensively, "I don't want that kid to be his…"

Peyton gave her best friend a hug, "I know you don't…You've been through too much," she said and then the hug broke.

Lucas walked into his room and saw Peyton and Brooke sitting there. Peyton turned around and he could see the tears in her eyes, and her rosy cheeks. Peyton got up from the bed and mumbled something to Brooke about calling her; and she barged past Lucas and slammed the door behind her.

"Is she okay?" Lucas asked as he looked at the door.

Brooke shrugged, "If you're thinking that her tears were over you then you're wrong Luke," she said and then got up from the bed.

"So you're pissed at me because of this Peyton thing too?" Lucas asked and then stuck his hands in his pockets, "She didn't want me Brooke…I love her."

Brooke scoffed, "Really?" She asked and then picked up to hoop earring from her dresser, "Why don't you tell that to the little slut that you hooked up with last night in my bed?"

Lucas looked at the earrings and mentally kicked himself, "I don't know what to say," He said softly, "I was hurt and upset and this whole Peyton thing was just…"

"You know what Luke?" Brooke said, "Just save it okay?"

"You're the last person I want mad at me right now," Lucas said, "Brooke, don't be like this!"

Brooke rolled her eyes and threw the earrings at Lucas, "Please go," she said and crossed her arms. Lucas picked up the earrings and gave Brooke one last pleading look, "Go," she said and Lucas nodded his head and left the room.

**xxx**

Lilly sat in the waiting room nervously as Nathan sat beside her and read a sports magazine. Lilly sighed and looked at him, "Do you even remember that night?" She asked.

"Vaguely," Nathan answered and then set the magazine down, "I was a drunk freshman…I had no clue what I was doing."

Lilly looked down at her hands, "After I got pregnant I was so scared because I didn't know who the dad was…" She began, "And you were the last guy I had sex with, I think, so…"

"If the kid is mine," Nathan said, "I will take full responsibility for this…I promise…"

"But," Lilly said and then gave him a small smile, "I know that you're in love with Brooke…So if this baby isn't yours I'll just go back to New York and settle in with the parents."

Nathan smiled and nodded, "We hardly even know each other," he said, "I'm sorry that we had to reacquaint ourselves this way…"

"Yeah," Lilly said with a small chuckle, "I'm glad you and Brooke are working things out," she said.

Nathan looked at her, "Me too," he said with a crooked smile.

"Lilly Stanford," the nurse called from behind her desk.

Lilly and Nathan both stood up, and Nathan grabbed Lilly's hand, "You ready for this?" He asked.

"Yeah," Lilly said and then took a deep breath, "I'm ready…"

**xxx**

Brooke sat on the stage at TRIC with her piano set in front of her; she saw Karen and Peyton sitting at the bar looking up at her proudly.

_Stand up straight _

_Do your trick _

_Turn on the stars _

_Jupiter shines so bright _

_When you're around _

_They tell us slow down_

_We're too young, you need to grow _

_The speed's the key _

_And they don't know who we are_

Brooke sang and watched as Jake walked into the club; he and Peyton made eye contact for a second, but she turned away and looked back up at Brooke.

_And who's to say that we're not good enough_

_And who's to say that this is not our love_

Nathan walked into the club and saw Brooke on the stage with the spotlight on her while she played her piano and sang. She was so beautiful, Nathan thought as he took a seat next to Karen.

_Mother, don't tell me friends are the ones that I lose _

_Cause they'd bleed before you _

_And sometimes family are the ones you'd choose _

_It's too late now _

_I hold on to this life I found_

Jake walked over to Peyton, "I'm leaving in a week or so," he began, "I just wanted to talk to you before the wedding and everything happens because I know how much I hurt you…And I never want to hurt you," he said softly, "Never…"

"It's a little too late for that Jake," Peyton said, "I lost Lucas because of how much I wanted to be with you," she said and started to tear up, "Everything was always for you Jake, don't you get it?"

_And who's to say we won't burn it out_

_And who's to say we won't sink in doubt_

_Who's to say that we won't fade to grey_

_Who are they anyway_

_Anyway they don't know_

"I've always loved you Peyton," Jake said as he put his hand under her chin.

Peyton turned away, "Then why are you getting married?"

"Because I realized that I was holding you back," he said, "You were always helping me with Nikki and Jenny…I just want you to live your life and be happy."

_And you say we're too young_

_But maybe you're too old to remember _

_And I try to pretend but I just feel it when we're together _

_And if you don't believe me, you never really knew us _

_You never really knew _

Peyton wiped her eyes, "I'll be happy with you in my life," she said.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered and then looked around, "I got to go…" Peyton nodded, but didn't say anything; Jake sighed and walked away.

_You and I, packin' up my room, we feel alright _

_But we're not welcome_

_Soon we'll be drivin', cause they don't know who we are_

**xxx**

Nathan walked out onto the river court and saw Brooke sitting on a bench looking up at the stars, "See anything you like?" Nathan asked as he sat next to Brooke.

"I love the stars," Brooke said in almost a whisper, "I never realized how amazing they really are," she said in awe.

Nathan looked at Brooke, "Yeah, me either," he said; still looking at her.

Brooke turned to him and smiled, "We really messed up each other's lives you do realize that right?" She asked with a laugh.

Nathan laughed and nodded, "The baby isn't mine," he said finally.

Brooke let out a sigh of relief and felt the tears form in her eyes, "That's the best news I've heard all night," she said and wiped her tears.

Nathan leaned in and kissed Brooke passionately on the lips; the kiss broke and Brooke looked up at him with glassy eyes, "I love you," she said softly.

_Who's to say we won't stay together_

_Who's to say we aren't getting stronger_

_Who's to say I can't live without you, oh_

_Who are they anyway_

_Anyway they don't know_

"I love you too," Nathan said with a smile.

_And you say we're too young_

_But maybe you're too old to remember _

_And I try to pretend, but I just feel it when we're together _

_Who is to say_

_And who is to say_

_And who are they anyway_

_Stand up boy, I shine so bright when you're around_

**xxx**

"Lucas!" Peyton called out as she ran over to him in the parking lot.

Lucas smiled politely at her, "Peyton," he said apprehensively, "Hi."

"I need to talk to you," she said, "It's really important…"

Lucas looked torn as a girl with tan skin and black hair came up beside him and put her arm in his, "I'm kind of busy tonight Pey," he said.

"Hi," Anna said energetically, "I'm Anna!"

Peyton smiled fakely, "Hi…Peyton."

"Lucas has told me all about you," Anna said with a cocky laugh, "Aren't you supposed to be getting married by now with some guy with a kid?"

"Anna," Lucas warned.

Peyton looked at Lucas in disbelief and then glared at Anna, "This was a mistake," she said and walked away.

Brooke and Nathan had overheard and Brooke stormed over to Lucas and Anna, "Excuse me bitch did I hear you right?" Brooke asked, "Because it sounds like you're barking up the wrong tree!"

"Barking?" Anna asked, "The only dog I see here is you…"

Brooke let out a dry laugh, "Hun, you don't even know me," she said and then crossed her arms.

"I don't," Anna said, "But my cousin Felix does," she said as Felix walked over to the group.

"Hey Brooke," Felix said with a scowl on his face, "Long time, no see right?"

**Read and Review.**


	10. Clarity

**The Bitter Taste**

**Clarity**

**xxx**

"What are you doing here?" Brooke asked through gritted teeth; she and Felix were standing in her room. He had followed her home after the Anna incident.

Felix shrugged, "I wanted to see you," he said softly and then looked her up and down, "You look beautiful."

"You have really shitty timing," Brooke said; brushing off the compliment, "I don't need this right now…We broke up a long time ago."

Felix walked closer towards her, "And that broke my heart," he said, "I'm in love with you Brooke…"

"You don't know what love is," Brooke said with a dry laugh, "Besides, I found the person who I want to be with for the rest of my life…"

"Lucas?" Felix said coldly.

Brooke shook her head, "No…Nathan."

"You're still trying with that shit?" Felix asked, "I thought he left you for Haley awhile back?"

Brooke backed away from Felix and crossed her arms, "He did…But I'm in love with him, and he's in love with me…"

"God Brooke," Felix said with a malicious laugh, "You still let people walk all over you!"

"You're an ass," Brooke said, "The only person I ever let walk all over me was you…And then I fixed that problem the night I dumped you," she said coldly.

Felix rolled his eyes and walked towards the door, "Whatever Brooke," he said, "Call me when your lover boy fucks you over again," he said and walked out of the house.

**xxx**

Lucas walked into Peyton's room and saw her painting while she listened to some new music. Lucas knocked on the door and Peyton turned around; she glared at him and turned back towards her painting.

"I'm sorry," Lucas said as he turned down the stereo, "You're in love with Jake…"

Peyton wiped her eyes quickly and turned to face Lucas, "Jake is getting married," she said as her voice cracked, "He came back because he wanted to tell me…He's leaving in a week," she said and then got up and walked over to her bed and sat down.

"I didn't know," Lucas said and then sat down beside Peyton, "I met Anna at a bar the night that I walked out," he admitted, "I really fell for her."

Peyton rolled her eyes and got up from the bed, "You knew her for one night Luke!" She yelled.

"I know," Lucas said, keeping his calm, "I don't know what else to say…She listens to me, and we can talk…"

Peyton cut him off, "And she's an easy skank!" She said, "I made a mistake Lucas…I thought I loved Jake, because I thought Jake loved me but he doesn't. He's getting married and I thought you'd be the person to comfort me, but you're too busy going out and finding bar sluts to fall in love with!"

Lucas got up, "You didn't want me!" He yelled back, "What am I supposed to do? Wait around for you?"

"I didn't expect you to just fall back in love with me," Peyton said.

"I didn't have to fall back in love with you," Lucas said, "I've always loved you…It was always about _you_ not loving_ me_!" He said and then walked out of Peyton's bedroom.

**xxx**

Brooke walked into Nathan's apartment; she walked back into his room where he was lying bed sleeping. Brooke took off her shoes and crawled into bed with him. Nathan opened his eyes and put his arm around her waist, "Hey," he said in a husky voice.

"Hi," Brooke said as she turned to face him, "I'm sorry about the Felix thing."

Nathan kissed her softly on the lips, "Is he still here?"

"I don't think," Brooke said, "He told me to call him when you fucked me over again," she said and looked down.

Nathan rolled his eyes, "Then I guess you'll never have to call him…"

"Good," Brooke said with a smile, "You don't know how happy I was when you told me that kid wasn't yours," she said.

Nathan put his arms around Brooke, and she rested her head on his chest, "You don't know how happy _I_ was," Nathan said, "I told you Brooke, I never want to hurt you again…"

"I know," Brooke said softly as she closed her eyes, "I know…"

**xxx**

Haley got out of her limo with Chris behind her; she stood in front of Peyton's house and took it all in, "Remind me again why we're here," Chris said impatiently.

"I told you this about a million times," Haley said, "Peyton booked us for a show tonight at TRIC."

Chris put his arm around Haley and kissed her on the forehead, "That's where you first sang…Remember that?"

"Yeah," Haley said as they walked up to Peyton's front door; she knocked on the door and Peyton opened the door.

Peyton smiled at Haley, "Hales," she said, "I'm glad you could come tonight…"

"Thanks," Haley said as her and Chris walked into the house.

**TRIC**

Brooke and Nathan walked into TRIC hand in hand; Peyton ran over to them, "Guys," she said, "I have something to tell you…And I know that you might be pissed at me," she said to Brooke, "But…"

"Brooke!" Haley said as she came from behind Peyton, "Hey hun…I didn't know you were staying in Tree Hill," she said with a smile.

Brooke looked at Peyton in disbelief and then looked back at Haley, "What are you doing here?"

"Peyton booked Chris and I for a show tonight," Haley said and then looked at Peyton, "Didn't Peyton tell you?"

Peyton sighed, "I was just telling them," she said.

"Chris is here?" Nathan asked.

Haley looked at Nathan and then looked back down at the ground, "Yeah…"

"Hales we have to get on stage," Chris said as he took her hand and led her to the stage.

Brooke looked at Peyton, "I can't believe you would do this to me," she said.

"I wasn't trying to—," Peyton began, but Brooke cut her off.

Brooke crossed her arms, "Just because you're an unhappy bitch doesn't mean you have to make everyone else's lives a living hell," she said and then walked away.

Peyton looked at Nathan, "I needed someone to sing," She said, "That's all I was trying to do…"

"Why'd you have to bring her back?" Nathan asked, "Nothing good happens when she comes back."

"Then don't fall back in love with her," Peyton said, "You can't keep blaming everyone else for what you do."

Nathan scoffed, "I'm not going to fall back in love with her…I love Brooke," he said and then walked away.

Haley and Chris got on stage, "This song is to everyone who's in love tonight," Haley said as her and Chris smiled at each other.

"Brooke," Nathan said as he ran out of the club to catch her, "Listen to me," he said, "I am not going to fall back in love with her!"

Brooke hung up her cell phone and Nathan saw that she was crying, "My mom died," she said softly and then fell into Nathan's arms."

"Brooke," Nathan said sincerely as he comforted her, "Baby…"

Peyton walked out of the club and saw the couple standing there holding each other, "Guys I am so sorry about this Haley thing," she said as she walked up to them.

Brooke let go of Nathan and hugged her best friend, "My mom died," she said.

"Oh my god," Peyton said softly and then looked at Nathan, "Brooke…"

Brooke held onto Nathan's hand, "I have to go to New York for the funeral and stuff," she said.

"Let me go with you," they heard Lucas say as he walked up to the three.

Nathan looked at him as did Peyton, "Lucas," Brooke said and then gave him a hug.

"I want to move to New York," he said.

"What?" Peyton asked.

The hug broke and Lucas sighed, "I've been making a lot of mistakes lately…I want to leave Tree Hill."

**xxx**

Nathan sat in Brooke's room as she packed her bags, "I want to go with you," he said.

"I couldn't do that to you," she said softly, "There is so much shit that I have to deal with right now, and I don't want you to get involved with all my personal craziness."

Nathan hugged Brooke and kissed her passionately on the lips, "I want to be involved though," he said, "I want to be there for you…"

"Take care of Peyton for me while I'm gone," Brooke said, "I'll try to convince Lucas to stay in Tree Hill," she said.

"It's not going to work," Lucas said as he walked into the room, "I need to leave Brooke…"

Brooke sighed, "You can't do this to Peyton," she said, "You two belong together…"

"I can't take this drama anymore," Lucas said, "I'm 23 years old…It's time for me to leave Tree Hill for good."

Nathan walked up to Lucas and gave him a hug, "Don't be a stranger," he said.

Brooke watched the two of them and couldn't help but smile; they had come a long way since the days in high school; Brooke picked up her suitcase, "Group hug," she said with a small laugh as all three of them hugged.

The hug broke and Lucas walked outside; Brooke looked up at Nathan and kissed him on the cheek, "I'll be back in a couple days," Brooke said as she stroked Nathan's cheek, "I love you," she said, "I love you…

"I love you too," Nathan said and then kissed Brooke passionately; the kiss broke and Brooke looked at him once more, "I'll be waiting for you," he said.

Brooke smiled and walked out of the room; she got into the car and looked over to Lucas, "You ready?" She asked.

"Yeah," Lucas said and then pulled out of the driveway.

Peyton ran into Brooke's room and saw Nathan sitting on the bed, "Where is Lucas?" Peyton asked.

"They already left," Nathan answered and then stood up, "Brooke said she was going to try and convince him to stay.

Peyton fell into Nathan's arms, "It's my fault he's leaving," she cried.

Nathan patted Peyton's back and rocked her side to side, "Shh," he said comfortingly, "It's not your fault," he said, "Lucas loves you; he truly does."

"I know he does," Peyton said as she looked up at Nathan, "I just didn't love him enough…"

**xxx**

Nathan walked into his apartment and saw Haley sitting at the kitchen counter with a beer in her hand, "What are you doing here?" He asked.

"I just thought we should talk," she said and took a sip from her beer, "We haven't done that in awhile."

Nathan rolled his eyes, "Look at you with a beer in your hand," he laughed sarcastically, "Looks like you're all grown up…"

"I'm moving to California with Chris," she said, "And then we're getting married."

Nathan shrugged, "I know…You told me you two were engaged," he said, "I wish you the best of luck," he said sarcastically, "Just don't find some musician and run off with him…Wait, you've already done that," he said bitterly.

"I loved you Nathan," she said, "I just wasn't ready for the whole marriage thing…I was 17 years old."

Nathan grabbed himself a beer, "Let's not take a walk down memory lane," he said, "Are you done here because I need to go to sleep?"

"Yeah," Haley said and then gave Nathan a small hug, "Maybe I'll call you sometime…Just to see how everything's going."

Nathan broke the hug quickly and looked away, "I'm not a little kid," he said, "I'll be fine…"

"Right…" Haley said and then walked out of the apartment.

**xxx**

Lucas looked over at Brooke and sighed, "I'm sorry about everything…"

"It's okay," she said with a shrug, "I'm glad I got to talk to her before she died…"

"Yeah," Lucas said, "You and Peyton are best friends," he began, "So I have to ask you this…Did she really love me?"

"Yes," Brooke said truthfully, "She has always loved you Luke…And just because she loved Jake too, doesn't mean that she wanted you to be Jake."

"That's what it felt like," Lucas said, "It felt like I wasn't good enough for her…"

"She risked my friendship for you," Brooke said, "Of course she loves you…"

Lucas looked at her apologetically, "Can you believe how stupid we were when we were 17…I mean, the cheating, the lying…Everything."

"Yeah," Brooke said with a small laugh, "But we learned from our mistakes…I hope."

Lucas smiled, "We were just bored teenagers who had nothing better to do but drink and have sex."

"It wasn't that bad," Brooke said with a wink, "The drinking and the sex part was the best part…The love was the thing that hurt the most."

"It's just weird to think that you and I were in love at one point in our lives," Lucas said.

Brooke shrugged, "I know, I still love you but on not in _that_ way…"

"Same here," Lucas said, "Things change…But change is good right?"

"I don't want you to leave," Brooke said, "It isn't fair to Peyton and it isn't fair to anyone else…"

Lucas stopped at a red light and looked out towards the window, "I have to leave Brooke…"

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	11. Down This Road

**The Bitter Taste**

**Down This Road**

**xxx**

Lucas and Brooke walked into their hotel room and saw a King sized bed, they looked at each other and laughed, "Of course we get the room with one bed," Brooke said, "So predictable."

They put their suitcases down and Brooke sat on the edge of the bed and turned on the TV; Lucas sat down and leaned against the bed frame, "You know what I always wondered? How you and Nathan got together," he said.

"Weird. Right?" Brooke asked.

"Yeah, but not in a bad way or anything," Lucas said, "But if somebody would've asked me six years ago if I thought you and Nathan would be together, I probably would've said no," he said, "It was always you and me, Peyton and Jake, Haley and Nathan…"

Brooke turned down the sound on the TV and laid on her side, "It's funny how things work out," she said, "When Haley left, he was so sad and so lonely…I was there for him, and Nathan was there for me…We fell in love."

"Then Jake left and Haley came back," Lucas began, "Then you left…"

Brooke sighed and looked down at the comforter, "And I regret leaving…That's why I think you should stay in Tree Hill, because in the long run you'll just regret it."

"I fucked everything over with Peyton," Lucas pointed out, "I mean, I gave up on her and ended up sleeping with some girl who I thought I actually had a connection with."

Brooke looked up at Luke, "Whatever happened to Anna…After that night with the whole Felix incident I haven't seen or heard about her."

"I realized that she was nothing to me," he began, "She wasn't Peyton, and I told her that I couldn't be with her anymore."

"What did she do?" Brooke asked.

Lucas chuckled to himself and ran his fingers along his hair, "She told me that I was a fucking loser and that I was making the biggest mistake ever…"

"Bitch much?" Brooke laughed.

"Yeah," Lucas said as he laughed along with Brooke, "I don't like hurting people…Especially people I love."

Brooke nodded, "I love this," she said, "This talking thing."

Lucas smiled, "Do you ever think about what would happen if Haley never would have left, and if you and I were still together?"

"Sometimes," Brooke shrugged, "Look," she said getting up from the bed, "If you think that something's going to happen between us then you're wrong Luke…I can never hurt Nathan!"

"Brooke," Lucas said, "I wasn't suggesting anything…I was just wondering," he said and then gave her a comforting smile, "Believe me, I know how much you love Nathan."

Brooke blushed and then sat back down, "Sorry," she said; obviously embarrassed, "I didn't mean anything by it…"

"It's okay," Lucas said, "I just…I'm so amazed at how our lives have changed in the past six years."

"Me too," Brooke said, "I want you to stay home Lucas…"

Lucas looked down at the ground and exhaled, "I don't know Brooke…"

**xxx**

Peyton sat on the couch in Nathan's apartment while he played a video game, "Thanks for letting me come over," she said.

"I could use the company," Nathan said, "So…Are you going to tell me about this Jake thing?"

Peyton shrugged, "Jake's getting married…And we ended up sleeping together," she said regretfully, "But you have to believe me when I tell you that I love Lucas…"

"I believe you," Nathan said, and then laughed to himself, "It's weird us talking."

Peyton smiled, "Why?"

"Because when we dated we never talked," he said, "We just kind of…Had sex and fought."

"True," Peyton said with a small laugh, "I'm glad we can be friends…"

"Me too," Nathan said sincerely, "Come on; let's go out for some drinks…"

Peyton smiled and grabbed her purse, "I couldn't have thought of anything better myself!"

Peyton and Nathan took a seat in the hallway where Brooke and Lucas had had their first date. Nathan took a sip of his beer and looked around the bar, "Why'd you tell me about you and Jake?" Nathan asked; ending the awkward silence.

"I don't know," Peyton shrugged, "I just thought that since your Lucas's brother, and Brooke's boyfriend then we should start talking and being friends…"

Nathan nodded, "You were hurt when Brooke left weren't you?" He asked suddenly.

"Who wasn't?" Peyton asked as she cupped her drink, "I never thought I would see her again…And I don't think I'll ever see Lucas again either."

Nathan sighed, "Brooke is going to convince him to stay, believe me she's very persuasive," he said with a comforting laugh.

Peyton went to say something, but saw Anna coming towards her with a mean glare planted on her face, "Well isn't this cute," she said sarcastically, "You're both here cheating on your significant other…Awe adorable!"

"First off we're not cheating," Peyton shot back, "We're friends…Shouldn't you be taking some random guy home so you can fuck the hell out of him, and then have him never call?"

Anna crossed her arms, "Lucas seemed to like that in a girl…"

Peyton got up, but Nathan got in front of her, "Peyton," he said, "She's not worth it…"

"Awe," Anna cooed, "Your man standing up for you?"

Nathan glared at Anna, "She already told you that we're _just friends, _so why don't you just run along, get another round of drinks, and forget about this whole night?"

Anna rolled her eyes and gave Peyton one last look, "Whatever," she mumbled and then walked away from the two of them.

"Thanks," Peyton said as she looked up at Nathan, and then sat back down in her chair.

"No problem," Nathan said and then sat back down, "You want another beer?"

Peyton laughed and nodded, "I would _love_ another beer."

**xxx**

Lucas woke up and looked over and saw Brooke standing on the balcony of their hotel room; he got up and walked outside and stood beside her, "Brooke, it's 3:00 in the morning," he said.

"I know," Brooke said; her voice raspy, "I just couldn't sleep…"

Lucas put his arm around her, "Are you okay?" He said in almost a whisper.

"I just finally understand that I'm never going to see my mom again," she said sadly, "Today's her funeral, and it's so unbelievable."

Lucas gave her a sympathetic look and sighed, "You know I'm always here for you…And I'll be with you for the funeral," he said, "But Brooke…Why didn't you want Nathan to come?"

"I didn't want him to see me hurt," Brooke said with a shrug, "And I didn't want us to break up, because in a time of crisis I always break and make stupid mistakes…"

Lucas rubbed Brooke's back, "I'm going to go back to bed," he said and then kissed Brooke on the top of the head. He gave her one last look before heading back inside.

Brooke's cell phone rang and she saw that it was Nathan; Brooke smiled and answered the phone, "You do not know how much I need this call right now," she said thankfully.

"Hey baby," Nathan said as he sat on the couch in his apartment, "I didn't expect you to be up so I was just going to leave you a hella sexy voice mail," he teased.

"Damn," Brooke said with a small laugh, "What did you do tonight?"

"I actually took Peyton out and we had a couple beers," he said and heard Brooke laugh on the other end of the line, "What? I can be friends with my ex!"

Brooke let out another stifled laugh, "I know baby…It's cute," she said and then sighed, "I miss you…"

"I miss you too," Nathan said, "I wish I could be there right now."

"I know you do," Brooke said, "But I want us to be together for a long time, and…Things like this affect me, and I didn't want it to affect _us_."

Nathan ran his hand through his hair, "I love you," he said softly.

"I love you too," Brooke said and then let out a warm smile, "You don't know how badly I just want to kiss you right now."

Nathan laughed, "I know the feeling," he said, "When you get home, you and I are not leaving my bed for days, unless we need showers…Which we will get together."

"Can't wait," Brooke moaned playfully; she yawned, "Baby I'll call you after the funeral tomorrow…I love you."

Nathan smiled, "I love you too sweetie," he said sweetly, "Bye."

"Bye," she said and then closed her cell phone. Brooke walked into the hotel room and got into bed.

**xxx**

Peyton laid on her back while she looked up at her ceiling; Jake walked into her room with his hands in his pockets. Peyton looked at him and felt the tears already begin to form in her eyes, "You know, this is really getting old," she said.

"I had no right to come back here and expect you to be okay," Jake said softly, "And I can't say how sorry I am…"

"I know you're sorry," Peyton said with a roll of her eyes, "You're _always_ so god damn sorry."

Jake sat down on the end of Peyton's bed, "This is hard for me too," he exclaimed.

"Don't even say that!" Peyton yelled, "You came back here and fucked me while you knew that you had a wife!"

Jake threw his hands up in defense, "You were basically throwing yourself at me!"

"So now I'm a slut?" Peyton asked and then stood up from her bed, "You know what? You just need to leave!"

"Peyton," Jake said calmly, "I didn't mean it like that…"

"I don't need your sympathy and your lies Jake," she said, "I lost somebody I loved because I thought that you actually care, well Peyton was wrong again!"

Jake looked once more at Peyton and then walked out of her room; Peyton sat back down on her bed and curled up in a ball. She got her cell phone out and called Lucas; Peyton got his voice mail and she threw the phone across the room.

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	12. Someone To Love Us

**The Bitter Taste**

**Someone To Love Us**

**xxx**

_Nathan stood in front of Brooke in a big white chapel. Brooke looked around and saw Lucas standing beside Nathan and Peyton standing behind her. They smiled at each other; Brooke looked down at herself and saw that she was wearing a beautiful, white wedding dress. Nathan was wearing a tux and their hands were linked together._

"_You still my girl?" Nathan asked as his eyes sparkled, and his smile shined._

_Brooke looked up at him and met his gaze, "Always…"_

Brooke opened her eyes and looked around and saw that she was in Lucas's car; he looked over at her and smiled, "Were you dreaming about Nathan?" He asked.

"Yeah," Brooke said with a yawn, "Was I talking or something?"

Lucas shook his head and chuckled, "No, you were smiling…"

Brooke took a drink of her water and sighed, "I'm sorry I fell asleep…I had to somehow get my mind off that funeral."

"I'm glad that I was there," Lucas said.

"Me too," Brooke said as she thought about her mother lying so peacefully in a casket, "I don't think I could've done it alone."

"Brooke," Lucas said, "I am really sorry about your mom…If you ever need anything I'm here for you okay?"

"I know," Brooke smiled, "I just want to get back home…"

**xxx**

Nathan walked into TRIC and saw Peyton cleaning up behind the bar, "Hey," he said.

"Hey you," Peyton said as she wiped her hands off and looked at him, "Brooke's coming home soon," she said ecstatically.

Nathan smiled, "So is Lucas…"

"What?" Peyton asked.

Nathan sat down and rested his elbows on the bar, "I talked to Brooke…She convinced him to stay in Tree Hill."

"Remind me to kiss her when she gets back," Peyton teased.

Nathan laughed, "Hey! That's my job," he joked and then looked at all the drinks, "You think you can pass me a beer?"

"You know I'm not supposed to just hand out drinks at my bar!" Peyton said with a wink as she got herself and Nathan a beer, "What Karen doesn't know, doesn't hurt her," she said as the two of them clinked glasses.

Nathan took a long sip from his beer and then set it down, "So are you going to try and mend things with Luke?" He asked.

"I don't know," Peyton said as she took a sip of her beer, "Part of me is wondering if it's even worth it, and then the other part of me is telling me to go for it."

"You guys are in love," Nathan pointed out, "I mean, I shouldn't really be talking because I thought _I_ was in love with Haley, but I was wrong about that one!"

Peyton gave Nathan a sympathetic look and sighed, "Haley made a stupid mistake Nate…Everyone knows that."

"But I'm kind of thankful that she chose music and Chris over me," he said, "Because if she wouldn't have, then I wouldn't be with Brooke."

Peyton smiled, "Spoken like a true romantic!"

"I try," Nathan said and then took another drink.

**xxx**

Brooke and Lucas stopped at a bar; they got out of the car and they heard the rowdy music blaring from inside. Brooke looked at him and smiled, "Can you believe that I actually wanted to work at a place like this?" Brooke asked with a giggle.

"I could see you in some tight pants and a tube top," Lucas teased; Brooke slapped him playfully and the two of them walked into the bar.

They sat down and a big-chested, blonde waitress came up and took their orders; when she left Brooke nudged Lucas and smiled, "You're a perv!"

"What?" Lucas exclaimed.

Brooke laughed, "I saw you looking at that waitress's tits!" She said accusingly, "That's totally perverted of you!" The waitress brought their drinks and Brooke nudged Lucas again; Lucas rolled his eyes and almost chugged his beer, "I've seen you've gotten better at drinking since I've been gone," she pointed out.

"Somebody had to take the role of the drunk at parties," Lucas teased.

Brooke scoffed, "Ha ha," she said sarcastically, "_You are_ a riot."

"I know," Lucas said with a smirk.

After a few drinks later Brooke and Lucas were acting like they did one their first date; Brooke stumbled up and took Lucas's hand, "Dance with me Luke!"

"I can't dance!" Lucas exclaimed, "I am by far the shittiest dancer ever!"

"Come on!" Brooke whined, "We're drunk it doesn't matter if we suck at dancing or not!"

Lucas rolled his eyes, but gave in; the two got onto the dance floor and danced stupidly until Brooke's favorite song came on. Brooke moved her hips along to the base while Lucas stood behind her and put his hands on Brooke's hips. Brooke looked up at him and then turned around so that they were chest to chest; Lucas put his hands on Brooke's lower back and their faces' were inches apart. Lucas leaned in and kissed Brooke passionately; they took the kiss outside and Brooke leaned against the car as the two continued to kiss.

Brooke's heart pounded as the kiss deepened; Lucas put his hands under Brooke's shirt, and she ran her hands along his chest. They pulled away and breathed heavily; Brooke turned away and ran her fingers through her hair. Lucas backed away with his hands in his back pockets; they looked at each other, their hearts still beating loudly.

"I don't know what that was," Lucas finally said.

Brooke looked down at the ground and fixed her shirt, "We're just drunk Luke…"

"Brooke," Lucas began, "We can't…We can't do this."

"I know," Brooke said as she nodded her head nervously, "I-I know…"

Lucas sighed and put his hands on his head, "We'll get a motel room and then leave tomorrow morning…"

"Okay," Brooke said softly as the two of them walked across the street to the motel.

**xxx**

Brooke and Lucas sat silently in the car and looked out onto the road; Lucas looked at her and then let out a deep breath, "It was all just a big misunderstanding Brooke," he said, "Alcohol was involved…"

"We're 23 years old," Brooke said, "We should know better than to do that…"

Lucas gripped the steering wheel, "Are you going to tell Nathan?"

"I should," Brooke sighed, "But I'm not going to…It's just too much for him right now, and it's too much for me right now."

Lucas nodded, "I don't want to be in another love triangle again…"

"I don't either," Brooke said, "We just let things get out of control…It didn't mean anything and it never will mean anything."

Lucas nodded, "I'm sorry…"

"You don't need to apologize," Brooke said, "Either one of us could of stopped it if we weren't so piss ass drunk," she said with a small smile as Lucas pulled into the parking lot of Nathan's apartment complex, "We're friends Luke…"

Lucas smiled, "I know," he said, "Mind if I come up with you to see Nathan?"

"It's fine," Brooke said as the two of them got out of the car.

Brooke and Lucas walked into the apartment and saw Nathan and Peyton sitting at the kitchen counter with their heads down and an empty bottle of Vodka between the two of them. They walked further in and saw Alex sitting on the table top smiling.

"What's going on here?" Lucas asked.

Peyton looked up at the two of them and Brooke could tell she had been crying, "I just came by to tell your friends here a little secret about the two of you…"

"What the hell are you doing here Alex?" Brooke said through gritted teeth.

Alex laughed cynically, "Did you guys have fun at the bar last night?" He asked Brooke and Lucas; they looked at each other in disbelief, "Because it sure looked like you did…"

"What the fuck are you talking about, man?" Lucas asked.

Alex jumped off from the counter and smirked, "You can deny it all you want, but the story will always be the same. You guys had a couple drinks, then you made out, and then I watched you two go into the motel across the street…I'll spare the details of the make out session since you two know _first hand_ about what happened," he said.

"Nathan," Brooke said softly, "Peyton…"

Peyton got up and got her coat quickly, Brooke grabbed her arm but Peyton pulled away, "Don't touch me Brooke," Peyton yelled, but then lowered her voice, "Don't touch me…"

Brooke and Lucas exchanged looks and Lucas walked out of the apartment; Brooke glared at Alex, "I cannot believe you…"

"You're everything I knew that you'd turn out to be," Alex said harshly, and then walked out of the apartment leaving Brooke and Nathan.

"Nathan," Brooke said softly, "We didn't have sex…"

Nathan looked up at her with blood shot eyes, "How could you kiss him?" He asked, "After everything we've been through…I mean, I know I hurt you with the Haley thing but that was six years ago…You know that I love you."

"We were both drunk off our ass's Nate!" Brooke exclaimed, "I swear to God!"

Nathan shook his head and slammed the bottle of Vodka down on the floor causing it to smash to pieces, "I believed you when you said that you_ loved_ me and that you _missed_ me!"

"It only happened one night!" Brooke said as she walked closer to Nathan, "We were drunk Nathan, and all we did was kiss I swear to you!"

Nathan backed away from Brooke, "I want you to leave Brooke…"

"Nathan," Brooke cried, "I am in love with you…"

Nathan rubbed his eyes and went over towards the front door, "Just go," he said as he opened the door. Brooke nodded and walked sadly out the front door.

_Tennessee Williams once wrote…When so many are lonely… as seem to be lonely, it would be inexcusably selfish…to be lonely alone._

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	13. It’s Love, Make It Hurt

**The Bitter Taste**

**It's Love, Make It Hurt**

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews, and _italics_ are flashbacks.**

_Octavio Paz once wrote; Solitude is the profoundest fact of the human condition… man is the only being who knows he is alone._

**xxx**

Brooke sat in her room and opened a window; she got out a pack of cigarettes and stared at them. She closed her eyes and thought about Nathan, about how sad he was; and then about Peyton and the disappointment in her eyes. Brooke lit the cigarette and brought it to her lips. She took a deep drag and let it out slowly; again, she was alone.

Brooke heard her door open, and looked over; Peyton walked into the room slowly and stood her ground; Brooke could tell she had been crying, "Pey," Brooke said with a weak voice, "I tried calling you…I left you a couple messages actually."

"I know," Peyton said; uninterested and pissed, "So has Lucas…But I permanently have both of you on block."

Brooke took another drag of her cigarette and looked down at the ground, "You don't know how badly I wish that I could take everything back…I am so sorry."

"I finally understand how you felt back when we were in high school," Peyton said, ignoring Brooke's apology, "You betrayed me," she said, "And I don't know how to act towards you anymore…"

Brooke walked closer towards Peyton, "You cannot do this to me Peyton, I love you…You're my best friend!"

"I expected a lot more from you," Peyton said as her eyes got glossy, "I understand doing this back in high school, but we're 23 years old Brooke."

Brooke backed away and shook her head, "So let's just forget about you and Jake right?" She pointed out, "You are such a hypocrite!"

"Don't try to blame your sluttiness on me!" Peyton yelled, "You knew how I felt about Lucas!"

"I did!" Brooke exclaimed, "God Peyton I was fucking drunk! And maybe we did _want_ to kiss, but we never did when we were sober! I know how much you love him, and I know how much Luke loves you!" Brooke cried, "And you of all people should know how much I love Nathan!"

Peyton looked down at the ground, "Were you even going to tell us when you got back?" She said in almost a whisper.

Brooke looked down at the floor dejectedly, "I don't know…" She said softly. Peyton crossed her arms and shot Brooke a glare; she barged out of the room slamming the door on the way out.

**xxx**

Nathan sat on the couch in his apartment with his phone lying next to him; he picked it up and dialed Haley's cell phone number.

"Nathan," Haley said softly, "Is something wrong?"

Nathan let out a deep breath, "Brooke and Lucas kissed while they were in New York for her mom's funeral…"

"Brooke's mom died?" Haley asked in shock, "Oh my god, I should call her…" She said to herself, and then sighed, "Are you and Brooke broken up now?"

"She cheated on me Hales!" Nathan exclaimed, "And worse, it was with my brother…God, and she said that she loved me," he said spitefully.

Haley ran her fingers through her hair, "She does love you Nate," she said finally, "Don't you get it? That girl has always loved you…And you should give her the benefit of the doubt…You left her for me," she said with a dry laugh, "And that was a mistake because I _don't_ deserve someone like you."

"I don't know what I'm going to do," Nathan said after a moment, "I'll talk to you later Hales," he said and then hung up the phone.

"What's Haley going to do?" Peyton asked as she stood in the doorway.

Nathan turned around and stood up, "I thought maybe by calling her we would fall in love again, and I'd never have to deal with this whole Brooke thing," he said, "But…When I talked to Haley it just wasn't there anymore."

"Maybe we're not supposed to fall in love," Peyton said softly, "Maybe we're just supposed to be loners all our lives."

**xxx**

Brooke walked out of Karen's Café and headed down towards the River Court; she heard footsteps behind her and saw Lucas walking. Brooke stopped and turned to face him, "You feel guilty yet?" She asked.

"I've been feeling guilty," Lucas said, "Everything's so fucked up right now Brooke…I don't know what we're going to do!"

Nathan walked past the two of them and glared at them; Brooke gave Lucas one last look and then followed Nathan, "Nathan!" Brooke yelled; trying to get his attention, "Nathan Scott!"

"What?" Nathan said as he turned around.

Brooke sighed, "You cannot do this to me…It was a mistake, a stupid mistake! I don't love Lucas at all! I am in love with you…"

"You have a funny way of showing it," he said smugly.

"Don't even start that shit with me," Brooke exclaimed, "I took you back after everything with Haley! I make one mistake and you're just going to forget about everything we have?"

"What are you trying to say?" Nathan asked, "That I _deserved_ this or something?"

Brooke groaned, "I'm trying to say that I don't deserve this!" She said and then calmed down, "I would never try to ruin anything between us baby…I promise you that." Nathan looked down and walked away; Brooke sighed and walked back towards Karen's house.

Brooke laid down on her bed and curled up in a ball under her covers; she rested her head on a pillow. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

"_Nathan!" Brooke screamed excitedly as Nathan led her somewhere._

_Nathan laughed, "You're so impatient," he said, "Just wait one second and I promise I'll let you see the surprise."_

"_I can't believe I'm actually letting you do this to me," she said with a smile on her face, "You know I hate surprises!"_

"_You love them!" Nathan exclaimed and then kissed Brooke's cheek, "No peeking…"_

_Brooke let out a stifled laugh, "How old are we again?" She teased._

"_17," Nathan answered and then laughed, "Hold on we're almost here," he said._

_Brooke sighed, "I don't even know where 'here' is?"_

"_Okay," Nathan said and then took his hands away from Brooke's eyes._

_Brooke looked out in front of her and saw a big blanket with white roses and lit, white candles laid around the ground. There was a bottle of wine set beside the blanket and there were a few of Brooke's favorite fluffy pillows. She turned around and smiled at Nathan, "I love you," she said and kissed him passionately on the lips._

_The two of them laid down on the blanket and looked up at the stars, "I got the stars just right tonight," Nathan said with a coy smile._

"_You planned the stars?" Brooke asked with a laugh._

_Nathan nodded, "Of course," he said with a wink, "I wanted this night to be perfect."_

"_Well it is," Brooke said as she looked over at Nathan, "This is the best night of my life," she said._

_Nathan put his arms around Brooke's waist and kissed her neck, "Mine too," he whispered._

"_I love you so much Nathan Scott," Brooke said softly as she closed her eyes and rested her head on Nathan's chest._

"_I love you Brooke Davis," Nathan said with a smile as he rubbed Brooke's back; she looked up at him and kissed him passionately on the lips. The kiss ended and Nathan smiled._

_Brooke straddled Nathan and kissed him again, "We've never done it outside before," she whispered seductively in his ear._

"_Yeah we have," he said; Brooke looked at him in confusion, "Or maybe that was someone else," he teased._

_Brooke scoffed and playfully hit him in the head, "That's not very nice," she said and then went to get off of him._

"_Don't go," Nathan said as he gripped Brooke's hips._

_Brooke pretended to pout, "You were mean to me…"_

"_Baby, you know that you're the only girl I want," he said sincerely, "No girl will ever compare to you."_

_Brooke smiled and kissed Nathan softly "Thanks," she said in almost a whisper, "I never want to lose you…"_

"_You never will," Nathan promised, "I want to be with you forever," he said and then kissed Brooke passionately._

**xxx**

Peyton sat in her room as she played around on her computer; Lucas walked into her room and cleared his throat. Peyton glared at him, and then turned back around in her chair, "You're not welcomed here," she said.

"You do realize that you did the same thing to me with Jake right?" Lucas asked as Peyton turned back around, "But the sad thing is…You were sober when you did it, I at least have an excuse."

Peyton rolled her eyes, "You don't have an _excuse_, Luke," she exclaimed, "I trusted Brooke…And I trusted you."

"We aren't dating anymore Peyton," Lucas pointed out, "We weren't dating when the whole thing happened between me and Brooke so I don't see why you're getting pissed off!"

"I'm going to pretend that you _did not_ just ask me that with a straight face," Peyton said as she got up and slammed down a book.

Lucas looked down at the ground, "You know what Pey? Just stay home and feel sorry for yourself! I've apologized; I don't know what else you want me to do?" He exclaimed.

Peyton walked over to Lucas and kissed him passionately on the lips; they fell onto Peyton's bed together and passionately kissed each other. Peyton took off her shirt as Lucas hands traveled up her body. They stopped and looked at each other as they panted; Lucas got off from on top of Peyton, and Peyton put back on her shirt.

"Why'd you do that?" Lucas asked.

Peyton dug her hands in her pockets and shrugged, "Because I want you to love me," she said sadly, "Can you leave? Please?"

Lucas went to say something but Peyton sat down at her computer and turned up her music louder; Lucas looked at her once more and then left the room.

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	14. Happy Birthday To Heartache

**The Bitter Taste**

**Happy Birthday To Heartache**

**-Thanks for all the reviews, you guys are the best!**

**(A/N: _Italics_ are flashbacks)**

**xxx**

_Nathanial Hawthorne once wrote: No man… for any considerable period… can wear one face to himself… and another to the multitude… without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true._

Peyton started decorating TRIC as she sipped on a martini; it was Lucas's birthday and Karen had asked for help in decorating. Peyton couldn't tell Karen about what her son had done again. So Peyton just put on a smile and helped Karen out like she promised she would. She put up the "Happy Birthday" banner and taped a few pictures of Lucas up on the wall; one of the pictures was of her and Lucas from their trip to Canada. Peyton smiled sadly, and took the picture down and replaced it with just a picture of Lucas standing by himself.

"_I was wrong about you Jake," Peyton said as she walked into Jake's house, "I realize that this whole time that I've loved you…You never loved me back."_

_Jake sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, "We've been through some much together Peyton," he said, "You've helped me out with so much stuff…But I just don't think I'm in love with you, like you're in love with me."_

"_You've changed," Peyton said softly, "I've given up so much for you Jake…"_

Brooke walked into TRIC and smiled at Karen who was cleaning off the bar, "Place is looking good Karen," she said with a smile, "For my two-four I want you to throw me a bitchin' party like this!"

Karen laughed, "Bitchin'?" She questioned, "Where do you guys come up with these things?"

"Okay I just finished putting up the pictures Karen," Peyton said as she walked towards the bar with her hands in her back pockets; she stopped and looked at Brooke.

They stared at each other for awhile and Karen smiled at Peyton, "Thanks honey," she said sweetly, "Now could you and Brooke go downstairs and get the beer?"

"Whatever," Peyton mumbled as she headed towards the basement. Karen gave Brooke a weird look, and Brooke just shrugged; she followed Peyton down into the basement.

Brooke sighed, "You're going to have to talk to me sooner or later P. Sawyer…"

"So now you're telling me what I should do?" Peyton asked, not turning around, "And my name's Peyton."

Brooke looked down at the ground, "I am such a stupid bitch for doing this to you…I'll admit that…But sometimes you just have to forgive people for their mistakes."

"Look," Peyton said as she turned to face Brooke, "The only reason I'm here tonight is because Karen asked me to be…I don't want to deal with you or with Lucas because frankly I don't give a flying fuck about either of you!" She said coldly and then headed back upstairs.

Brooke picked up a case of beer and followed slowly behind Peyton; she got up to the top of the steps and saw Nathan carrying a bunch of boxes of food. They looked at each other, and then Nathan looked away quickly.

"_You shouldn't have come back for me," Nathan said as Brooke stood in front of him, "None of this would've happened if you would've come back because of my accident…"_

_Brooke wiped her eyes and looked down at the ground, "I came back because I loved you…And I still do," she said._

"_I thought I loved you too," Nathan began._

"_Don't tell me you don't love me," Brooke cried, "Because you know for damn sure that you do…You and I are supposed to be together forever! You told me that you wanted to be with me forever…"_

_Nathan looked down at the ground and rubbed his temples, "And I thought that you felt the same way about me."_

"_This is the first mistake I've ever made when it comes to me and you," Brooke pointed out, "I kissed a guy because I was drunk…You left me for someone who didn't even want you," she said bitterly._

_Nathan looked up at her and glared, "This has nothing to do with Haley and what's happened in the past…This has to do with right now, you and me!"  
_

"_I'm sorry Nathan!" Brooke yelled, "God, you don't understand how much I wish I could take everything back, but I can't! I've loved you at your weakest moments…Now can't you just love me back?"_

_Nathan sat down and rested his elbows on his knees, "I've been loving you Brooke," he said, "Ever since the day we looked up at the stars together I've loved you…"_

"_I can't see myself with anybody else baby," Brooke said softly, "I see myself with you forever…"_

Brooke brought over the case of beer to Karen as Nathan started to put the glasses on the shelves. Karen thanked Brooke and then started to put the beers in a fridge; Peyton walked over and leaned on the counter, "Well Karen the place is in tip top condition…Best the clubs ever looked," she said proudly,

Karen smiled, "Thanks you guys for all your help," she said, "Lucas will really appreciate this…" Brooke looked at Peyton who looked down at the ground when Lucas's name was mentioned, and then she looked at Nathan who did the same. Karen looked at Peyton, "You want to stay for a little bit longer…I know Lucas will stop by eventually."

"You know what I, um, have to go actually," Peyton said and then gave her a quick wave, "I'll see you later tonight."

**xxx**

Peyton walked down the steps out of TRIC and saw Lucas coming out of his car; she looked straight ahead and walked to her own car.

"Hey," Lucas said softly; but Peyton just kept walking, "I'm bringing Anna tonight," he said; Peyton stopped and turned around.

"Well it doesn't take you long to move on does it?" Peyton snapped, "First me, then Anna, then Brooke, then back to good old Anna…Congratulations Lucas, you're everything that I never thought you were," she said sarcastically.

Lucas looked at her in disbelief, "You didn't want me Peyton…I apologized plenty of times and you still don't want me back…"

"That's because you hurt me," she said.

Lucas scoffed, "And you don't think those letters to Jake hurt me?"

"I already apologized for that," Peyton said in almost a whisper.

Lucas sighed, "And I forgive you…Now it's your turn to forgive me." Peyton looked at him and then turned around and barged towards her car; Lucas put his hands on his head and walked towards the entrance.

**xxx**

Brooke walked around the club as people started to get settled in; Lucas was supposed to be coming in 15 minutes so everyone was waiting for him. Brooke looked on the wall of pictures that Peyton had put up and smiled to herself. It was like 6 years of her life was flashing before her eyes. There were pictures of Lucas and Peyton at what seemed like a graduation party; there were pictures of Lucas and Nathan at some basketball camp. There were pictures of Karen and Lucas when he was a little baby, to now.

Brooke wiped a small tear that was rolling down her cheek and smiled sadly to herself. Everything had gotten so messed up in the past couple of days that she didn't know what she was going to do anymore. Brooke sighed and walked over to the bar, "One beer," she said as the bartender popped up. It was Nathan; Brooke looked at him nervously, "H-h-hi Nate," she said softly.

Nathan mumbled something and then got Brooke a beer; he set it down and then turned to go away, but Brooke grabbed his arm, "Brooke," he said warningly.

"Please don't do this to me Nathan," Brooke began as the tears started up again, "I don't know what I have to do to make you understand that I still want to be with you!"

A taller, preppier version of Brooke walked up behind Nathan and rested her hand on his shoulder, "Are you almost done baby 'cause I want to dance," she said with a big smile.

Nathan smiled back at her, "Yeah just one sec hun…"

Brooke looked at her for a moment; she knew this girl, she knew this girl…Theresa!

"Theresa?" Brooke asked as the girl turned around.

"Hey Brooke!" Theresa exclaimed, "God I haven't seen you in years! The cheerleading squad totally sucked ass when you left doll!"

Brooke let out a small, fake laugh, "What are you doing in Tree Hill? In high school you said that you wanted to become a pro cheerleader and then move to Cali with a rich, hot, surfer dude…"

"Well I _did_ get married to a hot, rich guy," Theresa giggled, "But we got divorced when we moved to Utah…So now I'm back here with another amazingly hot guy," she said and then kissed the top of Nathan's nose.

Brooke looked at them in confusion, "Wait…You two are dating?"

"Well," Theresa began, "Not officially, but we're on a date tonight," she said and then looked up at Nathan, "And I hope this turns into something more," she said with a wink.

Brooke looked at Nathan and he avoided her eyes, "Excuse me," Brooke said rudely as she grabbed her beer and walked away.

**xxx**

Lucas walked in with Anna on his arm; everyone turned around and yelled "Happy Birthday!" Karen rushed up to her son and kissed him on the cheek and gave him a big hug. Peyton, Brooke, and Nathan all looked on; neither of them daring to wish him a happy birthday.

Brooke finished off her beer and then walked into the bathroom; she looked at herself in the mirror and began to cry. Her mascara started to run so she dabbed her eyes with a paper towel. She got out a bottle of pills that were in her purse and looked at them intently and then looked back up at herself in the mirror.

"_What are you doing here all alone pussy cat?" Nikki asked as she sat down beside Brooke._

_Brooke looked up at her in shock, "Nikki? What the hell are you doing here?"_

"_It's a bar," Nikki said, "I'm drinking…"_

_Brooke scowled, "You know what I mean…What are you doing in Tree Hill?"_

"_Don't worry it's no more Jake shit," she began, "I just came back to meet this guy my friend hooked me up with…Turns out he was a total dick with nothing going for him."_

_Brooke let out a small laugh and took a sip of her drink, "Aren't you pushing 30 by now?" She asked rudely._

"_Your funny friends," Nikki said and then ordered herself a drink._

"_I'm not your friend," Brooke said coldly as she finished off her drink._

_Nikki looked around the bar mockingly, "Where's your gal-pal Peyton tonight?"_

"_That's none of your business," Brooke said through gritted teeth._

_Nikki smiled mischievously, "Did you two break up?" She said with mock hurt, "God and you two were such good friends!"_

"_Listen bitch," Brooke began, "I'm about to pull all the extensions out of your hair and strangle you with them, got it?"_

_Nikki put her hands up in defense and then took a small pill from her purse. She swallowed the pill and then smiled, "I have a proposition for you Brookie," she said and then took out an orange bottle of red pills._

_Nikki shook the pills and Brooke looked at her like she was crazy, "I don't do drugs."_

"_These aren't drugs," Nikki said, "They just help you…"_

_Brooke looked at the pills and set them down, "No thanks," she said and then started to get up. Nikki grabbed Brooke's arm and pulled her back, "What the hell?"_

"_It's a present," Nikki said as she put the pills in Brooke's purse. Brooke zipped up her purse quickly and walked out of the bar._

Brooke opened the bottle and put a couple of the pills in her hand; her whole body began to shake. The door opened and the pills flew out of her hand, she scurried to pick them up and then looked up and saw Peyton.

Peyton looked down at the floor and saw the red pills, "What are these?" Peyton asked as she held one up to Brooke.

"Headache pills," Brooke said, "I've been having really bad headaches lately so…"

"Brooke," Peyton said as she looked at the bottle, "Don't lie to me…"

Brooke leaned again the bathroom wall and looked down at the ground, "I don't want to hurt anymore," she said softly.

Peyton sat down beside her, "Drugs aren't worth it sweetie," she said sincerely, "Don't do this to yourself…"

"I don't have a best friend, and I don't have a boyfriend," Brooke cried, "There's nothing that I can even do anymore…"

Peyton looked down at the crying Brooke and let out a deep breath, "You have me Brooke," Peyton said as she rubbed her back, "You have me…"

**xxx**

Brooke walked out into the parking lot and saw Nathan leaning against her car. She looked at him and then looked down at the ground until she reached him; she stopped, but didn't look up.

"What do you want Nathan?" Brooke asked finally.

Nathan sighed, "I guess I just want you to be my girl again…"

"What about Theresa?" Brooke asked.

Nathan rolled his eyes, "You know I don't love her…"

Brooke looked up at Nathan and they smiled at each other; he kissed her softly on the lips. The kiss broke and Nathan held Brooke in his arms, "Let's go back to my place," he said and the two of them got into Brooke's car and drove off.

**Read and Review.**


	15. Beneath The Willows

**The Bitter Taste**

**Beneath The Willows**

**xxx**

_Kahlil Gibran once wrote: You're reason and your passion are the rudder… and the sails of your seafaring soul. If either be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas. For reason, ruling alone, is a force confining; and passion, unattended, is a flame that burn to it's own destruction._

Brooke and Nathan walked hand and hand up to his apartment and saw a man standing there; he had a cowboy hat on, cowboy boots, denim jeans, and a buttoned shirt. He looked like he was maybe in his early 30's, Nathan looked at him in confusion and Brooke yelled excitedly.

She ran up to him and jumped in his arms, "Travis!" She squealed as he spun her around. Nathan walked a little closer to the scene in front of him and crossed his arms.

"Hey darlin'," the man said with a southern accent; he tipped his hat to Nathan and put out his hand, "Hey there," he said, "Name's Travis."

Nathan shook his hand, "Nathan," he said and then looked between the two, "Do you two know each other?"

"Yes!" Brooke exclaimed, "We worked together a little bit when I was in New York," she said and smiled up at Travis, "Travis is like a brother to me…Hell, even a dad."

Travis ruffled Brooke's hair a little bit and then smiled at Nathan, "So you're Nathan Scott?" He asked, "I've heard a lot about you," he said with a crooked smile, "You seem like a good man."

"Travis," Brooke said as she nudged him in the ribs; Brooke walked over to Nathan and grabbed his hand, "Would you like to come in?" She asked, "If it's okay with Nate…"

Nathan smiled down at Brooke and nodded, "Any friend of yours is welcomed," he said as the three of them walked into the apartment.

"Thank ya'," Travis said as he walked in. He whistled as he looked around the apartment and then turned to look at the couple, "Ya'll live together?"

Brooke smiled and shook her head softly, "Not yet," Nathan said; Brooke looked up at him hopefully and he kissed her on the lips.

"I'm glad to see that you finally are with someone you love," Travis pointed out, "Instead of that jackass Alex!"

Nathan laughed, "I couldn't agree with you more!"

"I don't mean to ruin this party Trav, but," Brooke began, "Is everything okay? I mean…"

"Why am I here?" Travis asked with a laugh, "I have this new song that I'm putting on my CD, and I wrote this part and it's perfect for ya," he said, "Ya got your guitar?"

Brooke went back to the bedroom and came out with her guitar, "Yeah," she said.

"Nathan sit at the counter and Davis and I will sing this song for ya," Travis said as the two of them sat on stools in front of Nathan.

They both began to play their guitars and Nathan was smiling already; he loved watching Brooke play, and loved it even more when she sang. Travis took a deep breath and began to sing.

_She put him out _

_Like the burnin' end of a midnight cigarette_

_She broke his heart_

Nathan listened to the song intently and realized that Travis was indeed a country singer. Country was something that Nathan didn't listen but he really liked this song, and he thought Travis was a really good guy.

_He spent his whole life tryin' to forget_

_We watched him drink his pain away_

_A little at a time_

**xxx**

Lucas stared up at the ceiling as Anna laid beside him, "I knew you'd come back to me," she said softly.

"How did you know?" Lucas asked.

Anna sighed and rested her hand on Lucas's bare chest, "Because you and I are two of a kind…We fall in love and then we hurt the people we love…Then, we find other lonely people like us. It's a cycle," she said then let out a malicious laugh, "I knew you were like me the day I met you."

"Are you saying I'm lonely?" Lucas asked.

Anna nodded and then got up from her bed, "You want a drink?"

"Yeah," Lucas said softly.

_But he never could get drunk enough _

_To get her off his mind_

_Until the night._

Lucas walked downstairs to where Anna was getting his beer; he put his shirt on and leaned against the doorframe. Anna turned around and jumped backed, "Oh my god," she said, "I thought you'd still be up in bed…"

"I can't do this Anna," Lucas said as he started to put on his coat.

Anna looked at him in confusion, "What are you talking about?"

"I don't want to be lonely," Lucas began, "I want to be in love with someone who loves me back because they want to…Not because they have to."

Anna rolled her eyes, "So what? You're just going to run back to Peyton and see if she takes you back?" She asked coldly.

"I don't know," Lucas said with a little laugh to himself, "Maybe I'll fall in love with someone else…But it sure as hell won't be you," he said and then walked out of the house.

**xxx**

_He put that bottle to his head and pulled the trigger_

_And finally drank away her memory_

_Life is short but this time it was bigger_

_Than the strength he had to get up off his knees_

Lucas stood outside of Peyton's house and knocked on the front door; he heard the rumble of thunder and the rain started to pour down. Peyton answered the door and saw Lucas standing there dripping wet, "Lucas?" She asked.

"I had to come see you," he said shivering, "The worst mistake was letting you go."

Peyton looked down at the ground, "Lucas…"

"No," he said sternly, "Let me finish…I thought that I could get over you, but I can't…Both of us have made so many mistakes with each other, but I want to be with you no matter what. I want to make this work between us, and I know it's going to be hard, but fuck it! I want to be with you Peyton, no matter how hard it is."

Lucas leaned in to kiss Peyton, but she backed away, "I'm moving in a couple days Luke," she said sadly, "My dad got this great new job and…"

"No," Lucas said as he put his hands on the top of his head and started to pace, "No, no, no…This can't be happening!"

Peyton stepped outside and closed the door behind her, "I'm sorry Lucas," she said.

"Do you have to go?" Lucas asked.

Peyton took a deep breath and leaned against her door, "I want to go…"

_We found him with his face down in the pillow_

_With a note that said, I'll love her till I die_

_And when we buried him beneath the willow_

_The angels sang a whiskey lullaby._

**xxx**

Travis smiled at Brooke and she looked at the sheet of music in front of her; she strummed the guitar and winked at Nathan.

_The rumors flew_

_But nobody knew how much she blamed herself_

_For years and years_

_She tried to hide the whiskey on her breath_

When Brooke sang she realized how close the song hit to home; she gave Travis a look and he nodded and smiled. He knew that this song was perfect for Brooke. Nathan looked at Brooke and he could see her eyes get glossy.

_She finally drank her pain away_

_A little at a time_

_But she never could get drunk enough _

_To get him off her mind_

_Until the night._

**xxx**

Peyton curled up on her bed and hugged her pillow; she looked at the boxes in her room and felt a tear fall down her face. She got out her sketch board and a pencil; she wrote the words:

**IT'S ALL THE WORDS YOU DIDN'T SAY THAT HURT THE WORSE.**

_She put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger_

_And finally drank away his memory_

_Life is short but this time it was bigger_

_Than the strength she had to get up off her knees_

**xxx**

_We found her with her face down in the pillow_

_Clingin to his picture for dear life_

_We laid her next to him beneath the willow_

_While angels sang a whiskey lullaby._

Travis and Brooke strummed the ending to the song and then ended it; they smiled and Nathan clapped loudly; Brooke ran up to him and kissed him gently, "Did you like it?" Brooke asked ecstatically.

"I loved it," Nathan said reassuringly as he rocked Brooke in his arms.

Travis took off his hat and rubbed his temples, "Ya did amazing darlin," he said with a smile.

"I did, didn't I?" Brooke teased and then hugged Travis, "It was good to see you again."

Travis smiled and tipped his hat to the two of them, "You were better than all the rest."

"Who was my competition?" Brooke asked.

Travis rubbed his chin, "This one girl named Haley James," he said; Brooke and Nathan looked at each other, "But she ain't anything like you darlin…"

"You've got that right," Nathan said as he put his arm around Brooke and squeezed her against him, Brooke looked up at him and smiled sweetly.

They all said their goodbyes and Brooke turned and looked at Nathan, "I should get going," she said and then turned towards the door.

"Stay here for the night," Nathan said as he grabbed Brooke's hip and brought her close to him, he looked down at her and whispered, "Please?"

Brooke kissed Nathan passionately and cupped his face, "I thought you'd never ask!" Brooke squealed and then took Nathan's hand and led him back to towards the bedroom.

**xxx**

Lucas sat in his room with his headphones on; he closed his eyes and put his hands behind his head. He felt a light tap on his nose; Lucas opened his eyes and saw Haley standing in front of him.

He took off his headphones and looked at her in confusion, "Haley?" He asked.

"Hey Lucas," she shivered, "I didn't know where else to go so…Here I am."

"I thought you were going to Florida or something with Chris to get married?" Lucas asked.

Haley looked down at the ground and rubbed her arms to get warmer, "I left him," she said, "I couldn't love him Lucas…I just, I just couldn't."

"Haley," Lucas began.

Haley's lip quivered and her body began to shake, "Please Luke…Just let me sleep here for the night…"

Lucas nodded and put a blanket around Haley; he hugged her tightly, "Are you okay?" He asked his former best friend.

"I miss him," Haley whispered, "I miss Nathan…"

Lucas pulled back from the hug and gave her a look, "Does Chris know you're here?"

"No," Haley said, "I don't love him…"

"Hales," Lucas said again.

Haley looked away from him, "Can I stay here or not?" She asked quickly.

"Yeah," Lucas said, "Yeah you can stay here…"

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	16. You Never Really Knew

**The Bitter Taste**

**You Never Really Knew**

**xxx**

_T.H. White said; perhaps we all give the best of our hearts uncritically…to _

_those who hardly think about us in return._

Brooke sat on Peyton's bed as she started packing her suitcases; Brooke pouted and Peyton let out a deep breath, "This is hard enough already," Peyton said, "Now are you going to help me or just sit there and make me feel bad?"

"The second one," Brooke said, "I just can't believe your leaving…I mean, we've known each other forever!"

"You did the same thing Brooke!" Peyton exclaimed and then stopped herself after she saw the look on Brooke's face.

Brooke looked down, "And I regret it…God Peyt, you just need to face your mistakes and face your troubles!"

"I want to start over," Peyton explained, "It's not every day that you get an opportunity like this…"

Brooke sighed and pulled a bunch of movies out of her bag, "We have to have a little girls night here before you leave," she said as Peyton smiled, "It's like a tradition or something."

"Okay," Peyton said as she sat beside Brooke and popped in the movie, "I'll promise to call," she said softly.

"I know," Brooke said as she wiped a tear away quickly, "I don't know what I'm going to do without you."

Peyton cooed and put her arm around Brooke, "I'm going to miss you too Brooke," she said, "Don't worry about me though…"

**xxx**

Lucas woke up and saw Haley looking around his room at all the pictures on his walls, "So are you going to tell me why you're here?" Lucas asked.

Haley looked over at him, "When I was with Chris I just kept thinking about everything…About Tree Hill and Nathan…"

"He's with Brooke now Hales," Lucas informed her, "You can't just come back whenever you please and expect things to be okay."

"I know," Haley said, "I know…This isn't fair to do to everyone I know that, but I can't help it."

Lucas shook his head and rubbed his temples, "What do you really want Haley?"

"A second chance," she said softly.

Lucas sighed and rolled his eyes, "I stopped giving those out a long time ago…"

"I thought we were best friends Luke?" Haley asked.

"Really?" Lucas shot back, "So did I!" He exclaimed, "But you just went off and left everyone without even thinking twice about it!"

Haley's eyes started to water and she turned around so Lucas couldn't see her face, "Why do you think I'm back?"

"I don't know," Lucas said, "Did Chris kick you out of the apartment? Huh, because I know for damn sure you wouldn't have left that guy for anyone!"

Haley whipped back around and glared at Lucas, "You just know fucking everything don't you?" She exclaimed.

"That's the truth isn't it?" Lucas began, "You probably did something stupid, and Chris left you!"

Haley threw herself to the floor and cried, "Stop it!" She screamed and then cried harder.

"Haley," Lucas said softly as he knelt down beside her, "Hales," he said again and put his arms around her.

Haley looked up at him, "I cheated on Chris with his manager," she said sadly, "He found out about it and kicked me out of our house…"

"I'm sorry," Lucas said softly and then wiped Haley's tears away, "Why'd you come back here?"

Haley shrugged, "I didn't know where else to go…"

**xxx**

Brooke sat on Peyton's bed and ate a tub of Ben and Jerry's ice cream, while Peyton sat and painted her toe nails, "Whoever said that Britney Spears can act smokes crack," Peyton said.

"I happen to love Britney Spears," Brooke scoffed, "Well pre- Kevin and pre- pregnant Britney, but all in all she's one of my idols!"

Peyton rolled her eyes and laughed, "Whatever floats your boat," she said and then put the nail polish back on her dresser.

Brooke bit her bottom lip and laid down on her stomach, "I'm in denial," she finally said, "I don't want you to leave."

"Brooke!" Peyton exclaimed, "I thought we made a promise that we wouldn't make a big deal out of this whole moving thing."

"But you're moving," Brooke pointed out, "As in packing your shit and living somewhere else."

Peyton laughed, "Don't worry I won't find a new best friend or anything while I'm gone," she said with a wink.

"You couldn't replace me if you tried," Brooke giggled, and then got serious, "Are you going to miss him?" She asked apprehensively.

Peyton avoided eye contact with Brooke and let out a nervous laugh, "Depends on which him you're talking about…I know a lot of hims."

"Peyton," Brooke said warningly, "I'm serious."

Peyton looked at Brooke and took a deep breath, "Yeah I'll miss Lucas," she said softly, "He came to my house the other night," she said, "He told me how he just wanted to be with me and stuff."

"What did you say?" Brooke asked.

"I told him that I was moving," she said with a shrug.

Brooke's jaw dropped, "He confessed his undying love for you, and you're still packing up and getting your ass out of here?"

"It's complicated Brooke," Peyton began, "Lucas and I have a lot of history together," she said.

"I know!" Brooke exclaimed, but Peyton gave her a look, "Okay…Maybe I don't?"

Peyton sighed and brought her knees up and rested her chin, "I never told you about a lot of things that happened between Lucas and I," she said in almost a whisper; she looked up at Brooke, "I got pregnant after high school graduation, and everyone was so happy for us and everything," she said with a smile, "But I had a miscarriage…"

"Oh Peyt," Brooke said as she rested her hand on top of Peyton's, "I had no idea…"

Peyton wiped a hot tear from her cheek, "I just think everyday how that baby would've changed our lives…"

"You didn't do anything wrong Peyton," Brooke said sympathetically.

Peyton's bottom lip quivered, "Yes I did Brooke," she cried, "Because the baby wasn't Lucas's," Brooke's face fell, "The baby was Jake's…"

"Come here," Brooke said as she hugged her best friend; she kissed Peyton's forehead and rocked her back and forth, "I'm here for you okay?"

**xxx**

Lucas walked into Nathan's apartment; Nathan looked over at him and nodded, "What's up man?" He asked.

"You know that I have your back," Lucas began, "Especially after the whole Brooke thing…I mean we're brothers."

Nathan looked at him in confusion, "Yeah I know…Is something wrong?"

"No," Lucas said, "Not exactly…" Haley walked into the apartment and looked down at the ground and then back up at Nathan.

"Haley?" Nathan questioned, "What are you doing here?"

Haley ran her fingers through her hair, "Chris broke up with me," she said, "I had no where else to go so I just came home…"

"This isn't your home anymore Haley," Nathan said sternly, "You decided that one a long time ago."

Haley felt the tears form in her eyes, "Nathan…You have every right to not want anything to do with me."

"Why are you even saying this?" Nathan exclaimed, "We're never going to get back together Hales, I'm with Brooke now and that's how it's going to stay."

"Haley?" They heard a voice say.

Haley turned around and saw Brooke standing in the doorway, "Hey Brooke," she said with a small smile.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Brooke asked and then looked at Nathan who shrugged.

Haley sighed, "Chris left me so I came home…"

Brooke laughed sarcastically, "Your home's with Chris…Don't expect to come back here and start trouble."

"I need to talk to Nathan," Haley shot back, "And I'm really sick of your shit Brooke."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "I'm glad to see you're sticking up for yourself James," she said sarcastically, "Or is it Keller now?"

Haley lunged towards Brooke, but Nathan held her back, "You're such a bitch!" She screamed at Brooke.

"Whatever," Brooke said and then walked out of the apartment followed by Lucas, "I hate her!"

Lucas looked back up at the apartment and then walked down the steps towards the parking lot, "Do you think the Chris story is real?" He asked.

"I don't know," Brooke said softly, "But I know that she's going to get him back in her life…"

**xxx**

Brooke and Peyton drove towards the airport as they listened to one of Peyton's mixes.

"I wish I could come with you Peyton," Brooke said finally.

Peyton looked over at her friend sympathetically, "Is it because of this whole Haley thing?" She asked.

Brooke nodded, "It's like every time something goes good for me, something ten times shittier happens…"

"Brooke," Peyton said, "You know Nathan loves you more than anything…"

Brooke shrugged, "Sometimes I wish that I could go back in time and do everything over again…" She said softly and then refocused her eyes on the road.

"What would you have done differently?" Peyton asked.

Brooke sighed and bit her bottom lip, "I would've married Nathan when I had the chance…"

"What are you talking about Brooke?" Peyton said in confusion.

_I'll sing it one last time for you _

_Then we really have to go _

_You've been the only thing that's right _

_In all I've done _

**xxx**

"I don't know why you keep doing this to yourself Haley," Nathan said as the two of them stood face to face, "We've been over for a long time now…"

Haley sighed, "I've been thinking a lot about us lately Nate…And I realize what a big mistake I made," she began.

"It took you six years to figure that out?" Nathan asked sarcastically, "Wow…"

Haley looked down at her feet, "I came back because I was thinking maybe you could come to California with me…"

"What?" Nathan exclaimed.

"I know that back in high school I should've asked you to go with me," she began, "So now's my chance…I'm asking you to come with me Nathan."

_And I can barely look at you _

_But every single time I do _

_I know we'll make it any where _

_Away from here _

**xxx**

Peyton and Brooke stood inside the airport; Brooke put her hands in her pockets and bit her bottom lip, "I'm going to miss you blondie," she said with a sad smile, "It won't be the same without you…"

"I'll miss you too," Peyton said as the two girls hugged, "Take care of yourself…"

_Light up, light up _

_As if you have a choice _

_Even if you can not hear my voice _

_I'll be right beside you dear_

Brooke nodded, "Yeah you too," she said, "Visit me sometime…"

"I will," Peyton said and they hugged once more, "I love you…You're my best friend," she cried.

They pulled away and Brooke turned away, "I love you too," she said and Peyton walked away towards the luggage area. Brooke walked out of the airport and got into her car; she leaned her head against the steering wheel and cried harder.

**xxx**

_Louder, Louder _

_And we'll run for our lives _

_I can hardly speak I understand _

_Why you can't raise your voice to say_

Brooke walked into Karen's Café and saw Nathan sitting at the booth; he looked up at her and then looked back down at the cup of coffee in his hands. Brooke walked over towards him and sat down across from him.

"Hey," he said; his voice hoarse and quiet.

Brooke put her hand on top of his, "Is something wrong?" She asked in almost a whisper.

"Haley wanted me to come to California with her," Nathan began; Brooke pulled her hand away slowly, "If I don't go with her she's just going to stay in Tree Hill and ruin our lives…"

Brooke closed her eyes and felt her bottom lip quiver, "Nathan," she said as her voice cracked, "Don't do this to me again…"

"I love you," Nathan said forcefully as he grabbed Brooke's hands, "I promise you that…I just need time to…"

"To what?" Brooke exclaimed; cutting him off, "To have a little fling with your ex?"

Nathan shook his head softly, "It's not about her Brooke…It's about us!"

"Please don't do this Nathan," Brooke cried, "Please…"

_Slower, slower _

_We don't have time for that _

_All I want's to find an easier way _

_To get out of our little heads_

Nathan's eyes watered, but he kept eye contact with Brooke, "I promise that Haley means nothing to me."

"Then why are you doing this?" Brooke asked sadly, "Why are you letting her win?"

Nathan sighed, "Chris is going to be in California too, because they're doing this big concert…I'm going to try to get them back together and then we can go back to being us," he said softly, "I love you Brooke."

**xxx**

_Have heart, my dear _

_We're bound to be afraid _

_Even if its just for a few days _

_Making up for all this mess_

Lucas and Brooke watched from the parking lot at the apartment complex as Nathan drove out and onto the road following Haley. Lucas put his arm around Brooke and gently rubbed her arm, "We're going to be okay," he said.

"Why when everything goes right, something has to go terribly wrong?" Brooke asked as she looked up at Lucas.

Lucas sighed, "Because this is Tree Hill," he answered and then walked towards his own car.

"Lucas," Brooke called out before he opened the door. Lucas turned around, "I don't think I can be alone tonight," she said softly.

Lucas nodded and closed his car door; he followed Brooke up to the apartment, "I'm here for you Brooke…"

**xxx**

Haley called Nathan; he answered and heard Haley giggle into the phone, "Can you believe we're actually doing this?" She squealed.

Nathan groaned, "I'm doing this because I don't want you to hurt Brooke."

"Nathan," Haley said sternly, "We have to work on us…I mean, we've both made mistakes in the past and…"

"No Haley," Nathan said maliciously, "The only reason I'm doing this is because I want you out of mine and Brooke's lives. I'm in love with her and there isn't a god damn thing you can do about it!"

Haley snorted, "If you're so in love with her then why are you even coming along?"

"I already told you," Nathan said in frustration, "I want you to leave Brooke alone!"

Haley rolled her eyes and sighed, "Give it up Nate…You know that if I never would've left you would've never even thought about dealing with that piece of trash." Nathan hung up the phone and turned it off; he slammed it on the passenger seat and kept his eyes on the road.

**xxx**

_Light up, light up _

_As if you have a choice _

_Even if you can not hear my voice _

_I'll be right beside you dear _

Peyton sat on the place and put on her seat belt; she leaned her head back and closed her eyes. She felt someone tap her shoulder and she turned and saw Jake sitting beside her.

"Jake?" She said in amazement, "What…What are you doing here?"

"I'm going down to Florida," Jake said, "My marriage kind of…Fluked so…"

Peyton looked at him in confusion, "What do you mean?"

"Well my fiancée wasn't a very faithful person," Jake said and then noticed what he had said.

Peyton rolled her eyes, "I guess you two have a lot in common," she muttered.

"Anna was just screwing around behind my back," Jake began; Peyton's eyes opened wide.

"Anna?" Peyton asked.

Jake nodded, "Yeah…I don't know if you guys got to meet her not because she was always at her grandparents when we were down there…Or at least that's what she said." Peyton laughed quietly and Jake looked at her, "What?"

"Nothing," Peyton said, "It's just…It's good to be out of Tree Hill…"

**Read and Review.**


	17. A Phone Call To No One

**The Bitter Taste**

**A Phone Call To No One**

**AN- Thanks every single one of you for all the reviews! You guys are truly the best, and I appreciate every single review!**

**xxx**

_John F. Kennedy said the courage of life is a magnificent mixture triumph… and tragedy._

_A man does what he must, in spite of personal consequences…_

_in spite of obstacles and dangers…_

_and pressures…_

_and that is the basis of all morality._

Brooke sat in the dark in her new apartment; after a month of waiting for Nathan to come home she decided to move out of his apartment and move into another apartment complex. It was Christmas Eve, and Brooke sat on her couch with a glass of wine in her hand. She liked the darkness and the silence; she had been sitting on the couch for what seemed like an hour. All Brooke could think about was what she had seen earlier in the day.

"_So, who are you going to spend Christmas with Haley?" The VJ asked her._

_Haley smiled, "Probably with my boyfriend Nathan."_

'Boyfriend,' Brooke thought to herself as she poured herself another glass of wine.

_Nathan walked out from backstage and kissed Haley; Haley put her arm around his waist as if she would never let go, "Is there wedding bells in the future for the two of you?" The VJ asked._

_Haley looked up at Nathan and giggled, "I hope so…"_

Brooke wiped her eyes and got off the couch, she didn't want to think about it anymore. She took the whole bottle of wine and took a big sip of it. That's what she had been doing lately, just drinking away her sorrow.

She also thought about Peyton a lot; Peyton had called a week after she left, but Brooke hadn't heard from her since. Brooke walked back into her room with the wine in her hand; she collapsed on the bed and let out a deep sigh. She looked over on her dresser and saw a picture of her and Nathan; Brooke put it face down and rolled over on her side.

Lucas stood in the door frame, "Are we going to my mom's café tonight?" He asked.

"Yeah," Brooke said as she turned over and took another swig from the bottle, "I just…I need to get my dress on and everything."

Lucas gave her a sympathetic smile and took the wine bottle out of her hand, "You're not showing up to my mom's café drunk," he said and then looked at the bottle, "Since when do you drink cheap wine?"

"Since I found out that Nathan and Haley were a couple," she replied bluntly; Lucas looked down at the ground, "I saw TRL, and I saw those two kiss," she said in disgust, "I knew that it was going to happen…It was just a matter of time."

Lucas sat down on the edge of Brooke's bed, "He loves you Brooke," he said and then sighed, "I mean, Nathan can be an ass sometimes, but when it comes to you…He's a great guy, and he really cares about you."

"I'm not going to wait up for him anymore Luke," Brooke said, "It's time for me to just move on…I mean I have to start dating again."

"You know that won't be hard," Lucas said.

Brooke smiled, "I just miss him you know?"

"I know," Lucas said and then patted Brooke's leg, "Come on, we're going to be late."

**xxx**

Nathan walked into the airport with his stuff and took a deep breath, Haley ran up behind him in tears, "Nathan!" She pleaded, "You have to stay with me…We're in love!"

"No we're not Haley!" Nathan said sternly as he pulled his arm away from Haley's grip, "You lied!" He said and then walked towards baggage.

Haley knew what she had done, and just stood there and watched him leave. She had tried to get him back, but it was useless. Nathan no longer loved her no matter what she did.

_Nathan walked into Haley's room and saw her on the bed with Chris, "What the hell?" Nathan asked._

_Haley and Chris both looked up, "Nathan I can explain," Haley said calmly._

"_I thought you told me that Chris kicked you out?" Nathan asked._

_Chris looked at Haley, "What the fuck is he talking about?" Chris asked and then looked at Nathan, "Haley broke up with me because she told me that you needed her and that you wanted her to be your wife again…"_

"_I'm out of here," Nathan said with a sarcastic laugh and then walked out of the room._

_Haley followed him as her eyes began to water, "Nathan," she said as she started to put on her shoe, "Nathan listen to me I can explain…"_

"_Explain what?" Nathan asked, "How you lied to me? How you completely manipulated me?"_

"_I love you Nate," Haley said in tears, "I wanted you back, and I knew that you wouldn't even consider it if I wouldn't have been alone and sad!"_

_Nathan crossed his arms and laughed in Haley's face, "You're pathetic," he said, "You know, back in high school I liked you because you were so sweet, so innocent, so truthful…But now I can't even stand you! I don't love you Haley, and I never will…So let's just go our separate ways."_

"_I tried to be the perfect wife for you Nathan," Haley cried, "But I couldn't…But I want to try and make this all work out."_

_Nathan shook his head, "I left the person who I want to be with back in Tree Hill," he said._

Nathan sat in the airplane and put on his head phones; he closed his eyes and thought about Brooke. Everything was planned between him and Haley, the kiss on TV, the public appearances. Haley wanted him only because he didn't want her.

**xxx**

It was late and Brooke and Lucas were almost the last people at the café. Brooke had a drink in her hand, as did Lucas. The whole night they had to watch couples kiss and hug; Brooke looked over at Lucas and bit her bottom lip, "You don't know how badly I wanted to punch every single person in this room tonight," she said with a smile.

"I know," Lucas laughed, "It's like you and I were the only two people who didn't have someone to hang on or kiss."

Brooke looked up at the clock, "It's 3:00," she said and then yawned; she looked at her empty wine glass and then back at Lucas, "You still want to drink?"

"Of course," Lucas said as he went into the back and got another bottle of wine. He poured some in both of their glasses and then held up his own, "What should we toast to?"

Brooke held up her class and put her nose in the air, "Let's toast to the lonely people tonight…The people who have been heartbroken and left to drink all their memories and feelings away," she said and they clinked glasses. Brooke finished off her wine and laughed, "Cheers!"

"Cheers," Lucas said with a smile; he looked around the room and then down at the ground, "Have you heard from Peyton?" He asked apprehensively.

"No," Brooke said softly, "I just want to know if she's okay…"

"Me too," Lucas said and then sighed, "I hope she knows that I love her…"

Brooke smiled, "She told me about how you came to her house the night she told you that she was moving," she said, "I told her she was stupid not to stay."

"I understand why she's leaving though," Lucas said, "I mean; I wanted to leave too…"

"It seems like everyone just runs away from their troubles," Brooke began, "I did, you did, Peyton did…"

Lucas nodded, "And if you don't run away from your problems, you just drink them away," he teased and poured himself another glass.

"I'm glad we're friends Lucas," Brooke said; they smiled at each other, "I don't know what I would've done without you."

Lucas stood up and kissed Brooke's forehead, "I love you Brooke," he said, "You're my best friend," he said sincerely. He looked up at the clock and stretched, "I'm going home…You need a ride?"

"I'm just going to stay here for awhile," Brooke said and took a sip of her wine, "I'll call you in the morning." Lucas nodded and gave her one last kiss on the forehead before leaving the café.

Brooke stood up and got her balance; she walked around the café and looked at all the pictures. Some of the recent ones were of her and Lucas just acting stupid; she smiled and touched the pictures lightly. Brooke saw a picture of her, Nathan, Lucas, and Peyton at the river court; she felt a tear roll down her cheek. The bell on the door rang; Brooke turned around and saw Nathan standing there.

She stood there in shock; it was Nathan. Standing. Right in front of her. Brooke didn't know whether to run up and kiss him, or slap him in the face. She stood her ground and looked at him, "What…What?" She couldn't even get the words out.

"Haley lied," Nathan said, "She lied about Chris, and about getting kicked out…So I came back."

Brooke's jaw dropped and then she regained her composure, "Would you have still left her if you didn't know it was a lie?" She asked.

"You know that I'm in love with you," Nathan began as he walked closer towards Brooke, "And I knew that I made a mistake…Especially on TRL when I kissed her…"

"I saw that," Brooke cut in, "It broke my heart…"

Nathan looked at her sadly, "It didn't mean anything to me…Haley doesn't mean a damn thing to me," Nathan put his hand on Brooke's cheek, "You mean the world to me Brooke…I came back because I realized how dumb I was being."

"Why would you even think about getting back with her Nathan?" Brooke asked.

Nathan shrugged, "It was never about getting back together with her…"

Brooke broke down in tears and fell to the floor; Nathan ran over towards her and rested her in his arms, "I'm sorry I said no to the proposal," she whispered.

"It's okay," Nathan said, getting a little choked up himself, "I didn't even think you remembered that."

Brooke nodded, "I think about it everyday…I love you Nathan, and the only reason I didn't say yes was because I was afraid. I was afraid of losing you, just like you lost Haley."

"You would never lose me," Nathan said softly.

**xxx**

Lucas laid on his bed and looked up at the ceiling. It was spinning, but it didn't bother him; he closed his eyes and then heard his phone ring. Lucas groaned, but answered the phone anyways, "What?" He asked.

"Sorry," he heard a soft voice say on the other line, "Were you sleeping?"

"Peyton?" Lucas asked as he sat up, "No, no…I wasn't sleeping I'm just…Never mind it doesn't matter, is something wrong?"

Peyton sat in her Florida home outside and looked up at the stars as she held the phone, "No," she said, "I just thought I would call and see how everything was going in Tree Hill…"

"Everything's going…okay I guess," he said, "We miss you."

Peyton smiled, "I miss you guys too," she said, "Is Brooke okay?"

"I don't know about that," Lucas said, "You should call you, she really misses her best friend."

Peyton felt her eyes water, "I miss her too," she said in a hoarse voice, "I'm glad you guys are all okay," she said and then wiped her eyes, "Did you mean what you said the day that you came over?"

"Every word of it," Lucas answered, "Look Peyt, both of us have made mistakes in our life, but I want you to know that I love you no matter what…"

Peyton felt her whole body shake, "I know," she said, "And I love you too…"

"Then come home," Lucas pleaded.

"I can't," Peyton said regretfully, and then heard her other line, "I'm sorry Luke, but I have another call…I'll call Brooke later, and we'll keep in touch."

Lucas sighed, "Peyton please come home," he said.

"Goodbye Lucas," Peyton said and then hung up the phone. Lucas heard the beeping on the receiver and sighed.

He heard his door open and Nathan and Brooke walked through it, Lucas sat up and felt himself smile, "Nathan?"

"Hey man," Nathan said.

Brooke held Nathan's hand and the both of them looked at each other giddily, "What's up?" Lucas asked.

Brooke held up her left hand and smiled, "We're getting married!" She squealed as the two of them kissed and hugged.

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	18. Say It Like You Mean It

**The Bitter Taste**

**Say It Like You Mean It**

**xxx**

_Sandra Day O'Connor once said we don't accomplish anything in this world alone._

"You're getting married?" Lucas asked.

Brooke and Nathan both nodded, "Nathan just asked me to marry him," Brooke said with a big smile.

Karen walked into Lucas's room and looked at the three of them, "What's going on guys?" She asked.

"Nathan and I are getting married!" Brooke squealed as Nathan squeezed her closer to him.

Karen smiled and ran over and hugged Brooke, "Congratulations!" She said, and then hugged Nathan.

"Yeah," Lucas said to himself, "Congratulations…"

**xxx**

Brooke put some more of her stuff from her apartment into a box; Nathan came up behind her and put his arms around her waist, "This feels like a dream," he said and then kissed Brooke's neck.

"I know," Brooke said softly as they rocked side to side, "I can't believe we're actually going to get married!"

Nathan kissed her on the cheek and then started packing more things into boxes, "I can't think of a better girl to marry," he said truthfully and then closed up one of the boxes, "What kind of wedding do you want?" He asked and then sat on the couch.

"A perfect one," Brooke said as she straddled Nathan and ran her finger down his cheek, "With the perfect flowers," she said softly as she kissed Nathan's cheek, "And the perfect food and the perfect dress…And the perfect groom."

Nathan kissed her passionately, "I already have the perfect bride," he said sweetly.

"Awe," Brooke cooed as she kissed Nathan, "I can't believe we're actually going to get married!" She exclaimed. Brooke's cell phone rang and the two of them groaned, "I'll kiss you later," Brooke said with a wink as she got off Nathan's lap and headed outside.

"Hello," Brooke said into the phone.

"Brooke," Peyton's voice said from the other line, "Hey…"

Brooke's jaw dropped, "Peyton?" She said, "Oh my god…I can't believe this is you! How are you?"

"I'm good," Peyton said, "How's everything going with you?"

Brooke smiled, "Good," she said, "Nathan and I are getting married!"

"No way!" Peyton screamed, "Congrats Brooke! I can't believe this!"

"Neither can I," Brooke said, and then calmed herself, "I'd really like you to be a bridesmaid…"

Peyton sighed, "I really, really want to Brooke, but I just…I think that if I come home, then I won't be able to leave again."

"What's so bad about that?" Brooke asked, "We all miss you Peyton…It seems like you've been gone forever."

Peyton played with one of her curls, "I miss you all too," she said sadly, "When's the wedding?"

"March," Brooke said.

"That's in 3 months," Peyton said to herself as she looked at the calendar, "If you really want me there Brooke then I guess I can come home for the wedding…But you have to promise me that you won't convince me to stay," she began.

Brooke laughed, "I promise P. Sawyer," she said, "Scouts honor."

"I'll see you then," Peyton said, "I love you best friend…And Merry Christmas."

Brooke smiled, "I love you too, and Merry Christmas to you too," she said and then hung up the phone.

**xxx**

Brooke knocked on Lucas's door and held a big present in her hands, "Christmas delivery!" She teased and walked into the room.

"Hey Brooke," Lucas said, "Or should I say Mrs. Scott?"

Brooke laughed and playfully hit Lucas, "Brooke's fine," she said, "But Brooke Scott does have sort of a ring to it," she said with a wink and then set down the present, "I got you something."

"You didn't have to do that," Lucas said thankfully and then opened the present. It was a whole bunch of old records which Lucas collected, "Wow," he said softly, "Thanks so much Brooke!" He said and the two of them hugged.

Brooke smiled, "You're welcome," she said and then bit her bottom lip, "There's more…"

"Brooke," Lucas sighed, "You can't spoil me with gifts like this," he joked.

Brooke laughed and then cleared her throat, "Peyton's coming home for the wedding," Lucas looked down at the ground and smiled slightly, "Isn't there some sort of saying…Absence makes the heart grow fonder?"

"She won't want to see me," Lucas said.

Brooke scoffed, "Earth to Lucas Eugene Scott! You two are, like, in love or something…Of course she'll want to see you."

"I don't know Brooke," Lucas began, "Maybe it's just time for me to stop living in the past…Move on, just like you said."

Brooke shook her head, "You and Peyton have something that's real…Don't give up on something special like that."

**xxx**

Nathan started carrying Brooke's boxes up to his apartment; he opened the door and saw Brooke's dad standing there looking at a picture that was on the wall, "Mr. Davis," Nathan said as he set the box down and put out his hand.

Mr. Davis looked down at Nathan's hand and walked past him, "I hear that you're marrying my daughter," he said, "Brooke called me and told me about it."

"Yes sir," Nathan said, "I hope that I have your permission and your blessing."

Mr. Davis sighed, "You have my permission Nathan, but you will never have my blessing."

"I don't understand," Nathan began, "I love your daughter Mr. Davis…I always have and I always will."

He rubbed his temples, "I know about the whole Haley thing Nate I'm not stupid…Brooke found Alex and from what I can tell he is a really great guy."

"He's not," Nathan said, "He was abusive and mean…And, I know that I took Haley back before, but I knew that was a mistake and it's a mistake I'm never going to make again."

Mr. Davis looked at Nathan, "Brooke is a naïve young woman…She gets in over her head, and she can get hurt easily…I just hope that you understand that," he said and then walked out of the apartment. Nathan looked back at the door and put his hands on his head and let out a deep breath.

**xxx**

Nathan walked out onto the river court and saw Brooke looking up at the sky as the snowflakes fell on her cheeks. He smiled and wrapped his arms around her waist, "Hey beautiful," he whispered in her ear.

"I love you," Brooke said softly and then turned around and kissed Nathan passionately. She looked back up at the sky and sighed, "It's so peaceful out here," she began.

Nathan nodded, "How long have you been out here?" He asked as he warmed her up.

"I don't know," Brooke said and then picked up a snowball and threw it at Nathan.

"Brooke!" Nathan exclaimed and then threw snow at her, "You're dead little girl!"

Brooke laughed hysterically as the snowball fight continued between the two of them. Nathan grabbed Brooke's waist as she pushed him the snow; she fell on top of Nathan, "I win," she said and then stuck out her tongue.

"You win," Nathan said a little out of breath. They looked at each other for a moment and kissed passionately.

Brooke smiled and ran her fingers through Nathan's now wet hair, "I love you Nathan Scott," she said softly.

"I love you too Brooke Scott," he said and then kissed her on the cheek.

Brooke giggled, "Who would've thought that I would actually become a Scott?"

"Why don't you sing anymore?" Nathan asked out of the blue.

Brooke looked at him in confusion, "Random question…"

"I know," Nathan began, "I was just wondering because you haven't sung in awhile."

Brooke rolled her eyes playfully, "What about that time with Travis."

"You know what I mean," Nathan said, "I mean I want you to follow your dreams and everything."

Brooke smirked and kissed Nathan's forehead, "My dreams are to be with you…And I'm never going to let the little things come between us…"

"It's getting cold," Nathan said as he stood up, "I don't want my wife to get sick," he smiled.

Brooke got up as well, "I'm not your wife yet buddy," she teased and then linked arms with him.

**xxx**

Karen walked into Lucas's room and saw him sitting on the bed reading a book, "Knock, knock," she said with a smile and then sat down on the bed with her son, "Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Lucas said and then turned the page.

Karen gave him a look, "I'm a mom Lucas," she said, "I know when something's wrong."

Lucas set the book down and shrugged, "I'm just lonely mom," he began, "I mean, Nathan and Brooke are getting married and I have no one."

"Is this about Peyton?" Karen asked, "Because if it is honey you just need to tell her how you feel…"

"I did," Lucas said, "And she told me that she was leaving."

Karen sighed and rested her hand on Lucas's shoulder, "You're a good man Lucas," she said, "I'm sure you'll know what to do," Karen said knowingly and then walked out of the room.

Lucas dialed Peyton's cell phone, it rang and rang until Peyton picked up, "Lucas," she breathed.

"Hey," Lucas said nervously, "I called because…I just needed to let you know that I really want you to come home for good. I want things to be how they used to be, and I just want us to start over and try again," he said sincerely, "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am in love with you Peyton, and that I want you to be mine."

The line was silent, Peyton wiped away a tear, "I'm with Jake now," she trembled, "We reunited on the plane to Florida…His marriage was a fluke so we're…We're together again."

"Oh," was all Lucas could say. He swallowed and then heard a knock at his door, "Well, I um got to go…"

"Lucas," Peyton said pleadingly, but then heard the dial tone. She sighed and set down the phone.

Lucas walked over to his door and saw Anna standing there; she was in baggier clothing and her make up was running, "Anna?" Lucas asked, "What are you doing here?"

"I'm pregnant," Anna said and then handed Lucas the test, which had a positive sign.

"This can't be happening," Lucas said as he handed her back the test and started to pace his room, "Oh my god…"

Anna began to cry, "I'm so sorry," she began, "You don't have to take care of this child…I just thought you would want to know."

"No," Lucas said and then hugged Anna, "I'm not letting this kid grow up without a father like I did…"

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	19. Don’t Let Go

**The Bitter Taste**

**Don't Let Go**

**-Thanks for the reviews!**

**A/N: Lucas is going to have some kind of a dream world when he's in a coma (like Nathan did) Where everything is mixed up; sort of like a "what if" dream. **

**xxx**

_W.J. Slim once said when you cannot make up your mind on which two evenly balanced coursed of action you should take-choose the bolder one._

Brooke walked into Lucas's room and sighed dramatically as she plopped down on his bed, "What do you need oh dearest friend?" She teased, and then saw Lucas's serious face; Brooke sat closer to him and saw that his cheeks were red, "Luke…"

"You're not going to be happy with me Brooke," Lucas said and then stopped to wipe his eyes.

Brooke put her hand on his shoulder, "Lucas," she said softly, "Just tell me what's wrong…We can fix it."

"No we can't Brooke," Lucas said regretfully, "I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life, and now it's coming back to bite me in the ass."

Brooke looked at him in confusion and rubbed his shoulder, "What happened?"

"Anna came by here a couple nights ago," Lucas began, "And she's pregnant Brooke…She's pregnant!"

Brooke hugged Lucas and rocked him in her arms, "Shh," she said, "Lucas it's going to be okay…"

"The last thing I ever wanted to do was upset you and Peyton," Lucas said as the hug broke, "And I did."

"It was a mistake Lucas," Brooke said as she stroked his cheek, "Do you even know if the kid is yours or not?"

Lucas shrugged, "She had the test and everything, but…"

"Get a paternity test," Brooke said, "I mean, that's the only way you'll know for sure right?"

Lucas nodded, "Yeah…Thanks Brooke," he said sincerely and then gave her a hug, "I'm going to call Peyton…"

"Lucas," Brooke began.

Lucas stopped her, "No…I have to be honest with her…I love her." Brooke nodded and then walked out of Lucas's room.

Lucas dialed Peyton's number and waited until she answered, "Peyton," he said.

"Hey Luke," Peyton said in slight confusion, "Are you okay?" She asked.

Lucas stood up and started to pace his room, "Actually, there's something that happened…"

"Oh my god," Peyton said, "Is everyone okay?" She asked; worried.

"Yeah," Lucas assured her, "Everyone's fine…I just…Anna came to me a couple nights ago and told me that she was pregnant, and she thinks the baby's mine."

The line was silent, all Lucas could hear was Peyton's faint breathing, "Wow," Peyton said, and then went outside, "Well I have some news for you Luke…Anna and Jake were engaged to be married," she said.

"You're kidding," Lucas said as he sat back down on his bed and groaned, "So I guess I was making a big of a mistake as you were," he pointed out.

Peyton sighed, "Don't beat yourself up about it," she said, "I knew that Jake was getting married, you didn't know that Anna was."

"I feel like shit," Lucas said and then closed his eyes, "This reminds me of back when you were pregnant," he said out of the blue.

Peyton's hands began to sweat, "We don't have to bring this up…" She said apprehensively.

"No we should talk about this," Lucas began, "I'm sorry that you had a miscarriage," he said, "I think that maybe the baby would've helped us out in the long run…"

Peyton felt her bottom lip quiver, "I have to be honest with you Lucas," she said as she gnawed on her fingernail.

"What do you mean?" Lucas asked in confusion.

Peyton started to cry, and wiped her eyes, "The baby wasn't yours," she said sympathetically, "It was Jake's."

"You kept this from me?" Lucas asked in anger, "How could you?" He screamed into the phone.

"I was going to tell you, but…" Peyton began.

Lucas punched a hole in the wall, "I don't want to see you anymore Peyton, and I don't love you," he said and then slammed the phone against the wall. He grabbed his coat and walked out and got into his car.

He drove down the road as the snow fell down quicker and quicker; Lucas's eyes burned with tears as he sped down into town. He didn't care anymore; he sped past the river court and saw a truck coming from his left. Lucas had a red light but that just made him step on the gas harder; he gritted his teeth and closed his eyes as the truck slammed into his car.

**xxx**

Brooke sat in the waiting room of the hospital; she looked up and saw Nathan jogging towards her, "Hey baby," he said as the two of them kissed.

"They don't know if he's going to make it," Brooke said sadly as she held onto Nathan.

Nathan kissed the top of Brooke's head and rocked her side to side, "It's going to be okay Brooke," he said and then kissed her on the lips, "Lucas is strong, he'll pull through."

The doctor led them both into Lucas's room and they stood there; Brooke looked at Lucas and started to cry again, "The worst part is," she began, "Is that the doctor's think that he wanted to get his by the truck."

"What do you mean?" Nathan asked.

Brooke sat down and grabbed Lucas's hand, "There weren't any break marks on the road," she said, "It was like he knew that truck was coming, and that he wanted to be hit."

"Why would he do that?" Nathan questioned.

"I don't know," Brooke shrugged, "But I called Peyton, and she seemed to know that something was wrong when I told her…She's flying down now."

Nathan sat down beside Brooke and looked at his brother lying there; Brooke rested her head on Nathan's shoulder, "He's going to be okay," Nathan said softly.

**xxx**

Lucas woke up in his bed and looked around his room, 'What a dream' he thought to himself as he rubbed his eyelids. He stretched out his arms and then walked into the kitchen, he saw Brooke over the stove with only one of his t shirts on.

"Brooke?" Lucas questioned.

Broke turned around and smiled at him, "Hey stud," she cooed, "Why didn't you stay in bed? I was going to bring you some hot cocoa."

"Brooke," Lucas began, "You're getting married to Nathan!"

Brooke busted out laughed and walked closer to Lucas, "Okay I don't know what drugs you're on, but last time I checked Haley was married to Nathan," she said and then kissed Lucas passionately.

Lucas backed away and put his hands on his head, "Okay Brooke…Are we drunk? Because last time we kissed we got in a lot of trouble!"

"Lucas," Brooke said slowly, "You…Are…Crazy! We had sex last night sweetheart," she said and then wrapped her arms around Lucas's neck, "You're my super hot boyfriend, and I'm your super hot girlfriend!"

Lucas pinched himself, and then smiled, "This must be heaven or something," he said out loud.

"You need to go back to bed," Brooke teased and then took Lucas's hand.

They went into the bedroom and Brooke got on top of Lucas, "You know what I love about you most?" Brooke asked.

"What?" Lucas said.

Brooke started kissing Lucas's bare chest, "You're personality," she giggled, and then nibbled on his ear lobe, "And the way you make me weak," she said and then they started to make out.

"Whoa!" They heard someone say.

Lucas looked over and saw innocent little Haley standing by the doorway with her hand covering her eyes, "Haley!" Lucas said and then gave her a hug, "Aren't you touring anymore?"

Haley gave Brooke a confused look, and Brooke shrugged, "He's been acting weird all morning."

"You're not singing anymore?" Lucas asked.

Haley and Brooke both laughed, "Luke you know that I'm tone deaf," she said and then hit him playfully, "Thanks for bringing that up though smart ass."

"Where's the hubby?" Brooke asked as she started to get some clothes on.

Haley smiled, "We were actually wondering if you two wanted to come to the café with us," she said.

"Sure," Brooke said quickly and then took Lucas's hand.

**xxx**

Lucas watched as Haley and Nathan kissed each other when they entered the café; he scratched his head, still in confusion. Brooke took his hand again and they sat down in a booth.

"So how's pregnancy going for P. Sawyer?" Brooke asked Haley.

Lucas spit out his water, "Peyton's pregnant?" He exclaimed.

"Dude, are you on drugs?" Nathan asked him, "She's been pregnant for a couple months now…Her and Jake are married."

Brooke gave both Haley and Nathan a look, "Forgive my boyfriend here…He's been acting a little out of it this morning."

"Lay of the pot Luke," Nathan joked.

Lucas laughed slightly, "Sorry guys…Things have just been weird this morning you know?"

"Uh-oh," Haley teased, "What did you do to him Brooke?"

Brooke laughed, "I'll share some secrets with you later," she said and winked at Haley.

**xxx**

Brooke and Lucas said bye to Haley and Nathan and walked towards the river court, "Do you and Nate get along okay?' Lucas asked.

"I guess," Brooke said in confusion, "That's a very random question…"

Lucas laughed, "I'm sorry," he said, "I was just wondering if you two were friends or not."

"Yeah we're friends," Brooke said and then shrugged, "I've never had an in depth conversation with the kid or anything, but I'd consider us friends," she said and then her eyes got wide, "Look who it is!" She exclaimed, "Miss. I'm-Pregnant-And-Moody," she teased.

Peyton walked up to them with a big belly, "Very funny," she said and stuck out her tongue, "Hey Lucas," she said nonchalantly.

"Peyton," Lucas said and then hugged her tightly.

Peyton looked at Brooke and she shrugged, "Nice to see you too Lucas," she said.

Lucas kissed Peyton passionately; the kiss broke and he looked around and saw that it was only him and Peyton. Peyton's belly returned to normal and they were standing in the middle of the river court.

"Peyton," Lucas said in a whisper and they kissed again.

Peyton stroked Lucas's cheek, "I love you Lucas," she said and then a little baby crawled towards the two of them, "It's our daughter," Peyton said; her voice faint, almost angel like.

"What?" Lucas exclaimed, "I thought you said the baby was Jake's?"

Peyton put her hand in Lucas's and kissed the top of his hand, "I've always loved you," she said, near to tears, "And I promise that I'll always love you."

Peyton started to back away and Lucas reached out to her, "Don't go!" He screamed, but Peyton was already gone, "Peyton!" Lucas screamed.

**xxx**

Lucas screamed Peyton's name out and Brooke rested her hand on his chest, "Lucas," she said trying to calm him, "Lucas."

Lucas opened his eyes and saw Brooke standing over him, "How long have I been out?" He asked.

"About three days," Brooke said as she wiped the sweat off of his brow with a towel, "Are you okay?" She asked.

Lucas nodded, "I had the weirdest dream," he began, "You and I were dating, and Nathan and Haley were still married," he began, "And then Peyton…"

Peyton walked into the room and stood there with her hands in her pockets, "Hey Luke," she said nervously.

"Hey," Lucas said and then swallowed, "Brooke could you give us some time?" He asked.

Brooke nodded and then left the room; Peyton walked closer to Lucas and sat down beside him, "How are you feeling?"

"I think I have some broken bones," Lucas said, "And a broken heart."

Peyton closed her eyes and looked down at the ground, "It was wrong of me to keep the baby thing from you for all these years," she said, "But I was scared."

"I thought you loved me?" Lucas asked sadly.

Peyton grabbed Lucas's hand and rubbed it, "I do," she said as her eyes started to get glossy, "I've always loved you…"

"There's nothing more that we can do," Lucas said, "I think that we're over Peyton…"

Peyton nodded sadly and stood up, "I hope you get better soon Luke," she said and then wiped her eyes.

Peyton left the room and Lucas closed his eyes again, "I love you Peyt," he said to himself and then opened his eyes again

**Read and Review.**


	20. The Price You Pay For Love

**The Bitter Taste**

**The Price You Pay For Love**

**-Thanks for all the reviews!**

**xxx**

_Thomas B. Macauley once said the measure of a man's real character is what he would do if he knew he would never be found out._

Brooke sat quietly in Lucas's hospital room as she read a book; Lucas woke up and looked over at Brooke, he chuckled lightly.

"What?" Brooke asked with a small smile.

Lucas shrugged, "It's just different seeing you reading and all."

"Hey," Brooke scoffed, "Just because I used to be a cheerleader doesn't mean that I'm illiterate."

Lucas took a sip of water, "I know you're smart Brooke," he said, "What are you reading?"

"A Midsummer Night's Dream," Brooke answered, "The course of true love never did run smooth," she quoted.

Lucas raised his eyebrows, "Very good," he said.

"Why'd you do it?" Brooke finally asked, "Why did you basically drive in front of that truck?"

Lucas exhaled, "Peyton told me about the baby."

"Oh," Brooke said simply, "I'm sorry Luke," she said and put her hand on top of his.

Lucas grabbed Brooke's hand, "I'd die without you…"

Brooke pulled her hand away and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "Are they putting you on some serious meds, Luke?" She joked nervously.

"I don't want you to marry him Brooke," he said, "Peyton and I are over…"

Brooke stood up, "I thought we were just friends?"

"We are," Lucas said, "But this whole thing has made me think about how good we could've been."

Brooke put her hands on her hips, "You're scaring me…I'm engaged to **your** brother!"

"I'm sorry," Lucas said simply, "Maybe I just need some sleep." Brooke nodded and headed towards the door; Nathan was standing there.

"My brother wants to be with you?" Nathan asked as the two of them walked out of the hospital.

Brooke shrugged, "It's the medication Nate," she began and then kissed him on the cheek, "Oh shit! I forgot my purse in there," she said and then went back into Lucas's room.

Lucas held Brooke's purse up, "You left your book here too," he said.

"Thanks," Brooke said and then gave Lucas a hug. The hug broke and they looked at each other for a moment; Lucas gently pulled Brooke towards him, and kissed her passionately on the lips.

Brooke kissed back, but then pulled away. She touched her lips and looked over to see Nathan standing in the doorways, "I guess this whole lying thing is a regular thing for you two," he said coldly and then stormed off.

Brooke's eyes watered and she walked towards the door, "Brooke!" Lucas yelled to her; Brooke turned around and wiped her eyes, "Do you ever think…?"

"Stop Luke," she said tearfully and then ran out of the room.

**xxx**

Peyton walked into Nathan's apartment, and saw him sitting on the couch in the dark.

"I was hoping to catch Brooke," Peyton said, Nathan didn't even look at her. Peyton sat down beside him, "What's wrong?"

Nathan looked at Peyton, "Luke and Brooke were kissing again," he said sadly.

"Oh god," Peyton whispered and then took Nathan's hand.

Nathan kissed Peyton gently on the cheek, "I'm lucky to have you…"

Peyton sighed, "We can't do that," she said and then stood up.

"She's my fucking fiancée!" Nathan screamed as he stood up and kicked the coffee table.

Peyton wiped her eyes, "I know," Peyton said as she put her hands on Nathan's shoulders, "Maybe it was just a mistake…"

Brooke walked into the apartment and saw Nathan and Peyton standing there, "Nathan," she said regretfully.

"It's over Brooke," Nathan said, "The wedding's off."

Brooke began to cry harder, "Nathan, don't do this," she cried, "I love you so much!"

"You love me enough to kiss my brother?" Nathan yelled, "Fuck it Brooke! I'm not playing your little games anymore!"

Brooke leaned against the wall and caught her breath, "Please," she cried, "He kissed me because he's confused."

"I'm sorry Brooke," Nathan said; close to tears himself, "This isn't what I imagined my life with you to be like…"

**xxx**

Nathan stormed into Lucas's hotel room and threw one of the chairs to the floor; Lucas looked at him, "Whoa Nathan," he said holding his hands up, "I know you're upset about the Brooke thing."

"I'm not 'upset'," Nathan said, "I'm fucking pissed!" He yelled, "How the hell could you do that to me? I'm your brother!"

Lucas sighed, "Listen to me," he began, "When you were in California with Haley, Brooke and I got really close; and I think that in some way I developed feelings for her," he explained.

"So you decided to just kiss her?" Nathan asked, "And tell her not to marry me?"

Lucas rubbed his temples, "Brooke has been the best woman in my life…Did Peyton tell you about how that baby was Jake's? Huh?" He exclaimed.

"That's no excuse for you to kiss my fiancée, or should I say **ex**-fiancée!" Nathan said in frustration.

Lucas groaned, "You cancelled the wedding?" He asked in confusion, "How could you do that?"

"She's all yours now Luke," Nathan said, "Congratulations!" He said sarcastically and then left the room.

**xxx**

Brooke sat at the bar and finished off her drink; she looked around at all the happy couples. She smiled sadly to herself and ordered another drink. Peyton sat down beside Brooke and took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry," Peyton said softly.

Brooke swallowed the lump in her throat, "Me too," she said; her voice raspy and weak, "Just when something good happens," she began, "Something bad happens."

"Nathan loves you," Peyton pointed out, "You guys love each other, you'll figure out a way to work this out."

Brooke bit her bottom lip, "I thought you'd be pissed at me," she said, "I mean, you and Lucas and all."

"No," Peyton shrugged, "It's time to move on from everything."

Brooke nodded in agreement, "Plus you have Jake," she said and took a sip of her drink; she saw Peyton's look and set her drink down, "What?"

"I'm not with Jake," Peyton said as she played with the ends of her jacket, "I told Lucas that Jake and I were dating so that he could move on too…"

"Peyton," Brooke said, and then finished off her second drink, "I can't believe that Nathan doesn't want to be with me anymore," she said and began to cry.

Peyton put her hand on Brooke's back and tried to comfort her, "It's going to be okay," she said and then hugged her, "At least I hope so," she said softly to herself.

**xxx**

Peyton walked towards Lucas's room and saw Anna storming out of it; Peyton watched her pass, and then walked into the room. Lucas looked at her and then down at his hands.

"She seemed pissed," Peyton said casually.

Lucas looked up at her and nodded, "The baby isn't mine," he said thankfully.

"That's good," Peyton said and then looked around the room.

"Are you mad about the Brooke thing too?" Lucas asked.

Peyton shook her head, "You and I aren't together anymore," she said, "And I just wanted to say goodbye because I'm probably leaving tomorrow."

"Oh," Lucas said, "Thanks for coming down," he said and cleared his throat, "It means a lot to me."

Peyton nodded and then looked down at the ground, "You know Luke…Nathan really loves Brooke, and Brooke really loves Nathan."

"I know Peyt," Lucas said, "And I feel bad that they're not getting married, but…"

Peyton rolled her eyes, "You don't get it? Do you?" She asked, "It's not fair for you to just kiss on whoever the hell you want! You ruined someone's relationship because of your ego!" Peyton said coldly, "And that's **not** the Lucas I know," she said and then walked out.

**xxx**

Brooke put her engagement ring down on the counter in Nathan's apartment and then looked around; she sighed sadly and then turned around to the door.

Nathan walked in and saw Brooke standing there; he looked at her and then closed the door behind him, "What are you doing here?"

"I thought I'd give this back," Brooke said as she picked up the ring and handed it to Nathan.

Nathan looked at it regretfully as Brooke walked towards the door to leave, "Do you love him?" He asked.

"No," Brooke said and then turned around, "He's one of my good friends Nate, and that's all he'll ever be…"

"I love you too much to let you go," Nathan began as he studied the ring.

Brooke wiped her eyes, "Then don't."

"Did you feel anything when you kissed him?" Nathan asked.

Brooke walked towards Nathan and put her hand on his cheek, "It only made me realize how much I love you," she said softly. Nathan smiled and slipped the ring back on Brooke's finger; Brooke kissed him passionately as Nathan wrapped his arms around her.

Peyton walked into the apartment and saw the two of them kissing; she smiled to herself and walked out quietly.

**xxx**

Peyton walked into Lucas's room and sat down beside his bed; Lucas looked at her, "I'm sorry about earlier," he said.

"Brooke and Nathan are getting married still," Peyton said quickly, "I just thought you should know before you fuck anything else up."

Lucas looked away from Peyton, "I thought about what you said," he began, "And you're right…You're right about everything," Lucas said and then smiled at Peyton, "I want to try us again…"

"Really?" Peyton asked as her eyes began to tear.

Lucas nodded, "As soon as I'm out of the hospital I want work on us…"

"Okay," Peyton said softly and then kissed Lucas passionately, "I love you…"

Lucas smiled and kissed Peyton again, "I love you too…"

**Read and Review, please.**


	21. Forever Means Forever

**The Bitter Taste**

**Forever Means Forever**

**(A/N: This chapter is a week later; Lucas is getting out of the hospital, and Brooke and Nathan are planning the wedding. I decided to speed this chapter to a week because I wanted some drama, and I wanted to get Lucas out of that hospital room.)**

**Also, thanks to all the reviewers who have stuck with me through this story! I've always wanted to hit 100 reviews on a story, and I finally did. Keep reviewing and thanks to all of you!**

**l-a-c-18: Wow, I love your reviews! They're so long, and I am grateful for all of them. Continue reviewing, I look forward to reading your compliments and your opinions.**

**HalesnLukeBFF4ever: Thanks for the reviews**

**Cap'n Keira Sparrow: Thanks for all of your reviews as well!**

**Mony19: I also look forward to reading your reviews as well! Thanks for always reviewing.**

**brilliant brunette (Maggie): Thanks for your reviews!**

**Luucy:)..: Long reviews Love! Lol, thanks for your long reviews as well, they're greatly appreciated.**

**Agel15: You are one of the many loyal readers and reviewers…Thanks!**

**Dark Angel: I'm glad that you are more than happy to read more chapters. Thanks for the review!**

**And thanks to anyone else I forgot, every single review is great and I love reading all of them! Keep reviewing!**

**xxx**

_Stephen King once wrote time takes it all…whether you want it to or not._

_Time takes it all,_ _time bears it away… and in the end… there is only darkness._

_Sometimes we find others in that darkness…and sometime we lose them there again._

Nathan put his hands over Brooke's eyes as he led her somewhere, "This seems familiar," Brooke said with a smile.

"I know," Nathan said as they walked up some steps, "What can I say? I'm just a romantic type of guy," he joked.

Brooke laughed, "Or just very predictable," Brooke teased as she put her hand on Nathan's arm lovingly.

"Very funny," Nathan said sarcastically and then kissed the back of Brooke's head, "Alright," he said, "Open your eyes," he said as he took his hands away from Brooke's eyes.

Brooke opened her eyes and saw that she was standing on a deck overlooking a beach and a body of water; she turned around and saw that she was at Dan's beach house; Brooke looked at Nathan in confusion, but turned around and smiled, "Why…Why are we here?" She asked softly.

"Dan said that it was an early wedding present," Nathan said; Brooke could sense the smile that was forming on his lips, "My mom and dad are moving after the wedding…They want to get away from Tree Hill, they think it'll be good for them."

Brooke wrapped her arms around Nathan's neck and kissed him passionately, "So it's actually ours?" She asked giddily.

"Only if you want it to be," he said, "I mean…We could stay in that small, dirty apartment if you want."

Brooke laughed, "No way!" She exclaimed and then turned around to face the beach, "This is so beautiful," she said.

"I knew you'd be happy," Nathan said as he wrapped his arms around Brooke's waist, "You are happy right?"

"Of course," Brooke said as she gave Nathan a little nudge, "I have the dream house, and the dream husband," she cooed and then kissed Nathan again.

Nathan chuckled and put his mouth close to Brooke's ear, "Everything's going to be okay Brooke," he assured her, "I promise you the world…"

"I know," Brooke said as she turned around and faced him, "I love you," she said and they kissed once more, "Now let's go try out that new bed of ours!" She squealed and took Nathan's hand.

They ran upstairs; kissing on the way up. They got into the room and Brooke took off Nathan's shirt while he kicked the door closed. Brooke took off her shirt and then began kissing Nathan again. Nathan laid her down on the bed and got on top of her; he kissed her stomach lightly as Brooke ran her fingers through Nathan's hair. Their mouths met again and they both moaned in pleasure; Brooke looked up at Nathan as they both caught their breath. Nathan smiled and Brooke kissed him in return.

**xxx**

Peyton started carrying Lucas's stuff into her house as he followed behind with smaller stuff. He set down a box of books and grabbed his elbow in pain. Peyton walked over to him and touched it gently, "Are you okay?" She asked.

"Yeah," Lucas said in pain, Peyton gave him a look and he smiled, "Okay it hurts like a bitch…"

Peyton made Lucas sit down, "I'll carry the rest of the stuff in…I don't want you to do anymore damage to yourself."

"Thanks," Lucas said and then grabbed Peyton's hand, "Did you really mean it when you said that you loved me?"

Peyton sighed, "I do love you Lucas…"

"You're just acting…Different," he pointed out, "Maybe it's just me but…"

Peyton shrugged, "It's just weird…You and I have been through so much shit, and I'm nervous."

"I promise you that we'll work all of this out," Lucas said sincerely, "I care about you."

"I know," Peyton said with a smile, "I'm going to get some of the stuff," she said and then walked outside.

Nikki stood out on the front porch with a bitchy smirk planted on her face, "Hey Peyton," she said, "You want to tell me where Jenny and Jake are?" Peyton's jaw dropped; Lucas came outside and saw Nikki standing there. Nikki smiled and looked at Lucas, "Good to see you Lucas," she said. Peyton turned around and shared a look with Lucas; Nikki noticed this and laughed maliciously, "Surprise!"

**xxx**

Brooke and Nathan walked hand in hand as they headed towards the river court, "I could really get used to this," Brooke breathed.

"You mean having sex and then going for walks?" Nathan joked, "Me too…"

Brooke laughed, "You know what I mean…The whole acting married thing and what not!"

"Me too," Nathan agreed, "Being married to you means a lot to me," he said, "You're special to me Brooke…Very special."

Brooke smiled wide, "I'm a one of a kind," she said jokingly as she poked Nathan in the ribs, "You're special too," she said with a wink as they walked onto the court.

"Thanks," Nathan said with a goofy grin; he saw a basketball on the court; he smiled and picked it up, "God, it seems like years since I've played."

Brooke looked at the basketball and sighed, "I know, you haven't picked up a basketball for awhile now Mr. Superstar!" She winked.

"Oh yeah?" Nathan said and then took a jump shot; making it, "I still got the touch," he bragged.

Brooke laughed, "I know you got the touch, baby," she said and then licked her lips.

Nathan laughed and put his arm around Brooke, "How long has it been since you've picked up a pair of pom-poms?"

"Oh god," Brooke said as she hid her face, "Cheerleading…I remember when that was the only thing that mattered to me!"

Nathan laughed with her, "Because you were the captain!" He said, teasing her, "That was a very important job!"

Brooke hit him playfully and then looked down at the court, "Do you remember when you brought me here?" She asked, "We were 17, and you had a picnic blanket out with white roses scattered everywhere," she cooed, "That was so romantic."

"I remember," Nathan said and then pulled a white rose petal out of his pocket, "Here."

Brooke smiled and took it, "It's the little things you do that make me fall in love with you," she said and then giggled, "That rhymed!"

"You're a poet, let me tell you," Nathan said as they continued walking.

Brooke leaned into Nathan as they walked; she looked at the rose petal and couldn't help but smile. Everything was perfect…

**xxx**

Peyton dialled her cell phone quickly and listened to the other line ring, "Hello?" A voice said on the other line.

"Nikki's at my house," Peyton said to Jake.

Jake sighed, "I'm sorry Peyton," he said as he rubbed his temples, "I didn't think she'd come after you again…"

"You need to stop this shit with her Jake!" Peyton exclaimed, "I dealt with all this crap enough!"

Jake rubbed his head, "Tell her where I am, and I'll take care of it when she gets to Florida."

"I can't do that to you and Jenny," Peyton explained, "I know how much you love Jenny…"

"Peyton," Jake interrupted, "I'm 23 years old…Thanks for trying to help, but I can take care of myself."

Peyton bit her bottom lip and started to pace, "Fine," she said finally and then hung up the phone.

**xxx**

Nikki stared at Lucas as he rubbed his elbow; Lucas felt her gaze on him and looked at her. Nikki smiled, and Lucas rolled his eyes, "What are you looking at?"

"Remember the last time we met?" She asked, "You had a little accident with your shoulder."

Lucas glared at her, "Yeah so what?"

"It's funny how history repeats itself isn't it?" Nikki said with a seductive smile, "You think there are any carousels around here?"

Lucas groaned, "I've already made that mistake one too many times," he said and then stopped himself.

"Oh?" Nikki asked, "So you've been fucking other bar girls?"

"We usually refer to them as bar sluts," Peyton said as she walked out onto the porch where Nikki and Lucas were sitting, "Jake's in Texas…He's with some cousins that live down there."

Nikki smiled up at Peyton and then looked at Lucas out of the corner of her eye, "Last time you told me where Jake was your little friend sent me on a wild goose chase."

"I'm telling the truth," Peyton said, "I don't have time for these games anymore…I'm trying to move on with my life."

Nikki stood up and walked down the porch steps; she stopped and turned around, "Tell Brooke I said hi," she said and then turned back around.

Peyton and Lucas looked at each other in confusion, but then Peyton thought back to the night at TRIC, "You gave Brooke those pills…" Peyton said, almost in shock.

"For a dumb blonde you catch on real fast," Nikki said as she turned around once more, "Lucas came to me for sex once upon a time, and Brooke came to me for pills…And it was all because of you!"

Peyton took a step towards Nikki, but Lucas held her back, "She's not worth it," he whispered in her ear.

"Listen to your little boyfriend," Nikki said with a mocking smile, "Because if you lay a hand on me I'll make sure that your skinny ass is in jail." Nikki waved goodbye and then glared at the two of them; she walked back towards her car and drove off.

**Read and Review, please.**


	22. Like I’ll Never Be The Same

**The Bitter Taste**

**Like I'll Never Be The Same**

_George Bernhard Shaw once wrote; _

_There are two tragedies in life _

_One is to lose your hearts desire._

**xxx**

"_You would never lose me," Nathan said softly._

_Brooke looked up into his deep, blue eyes, "I could be with you forever," she said with a bashful smile._

"_Marry me," Nathan said._

_Brooke laughed and hit Nathan playfully, "Stop Nate," she said and then laughed nervously._

"_I'm serious," Nathan said and then got down on his knee; he took out a black, velvet box, "It's time for us to make things right between us…"_

_Nathan opened the box and Brooke looked down at the beautiful diamond ring he had, "Nathan," she cooed._

"_I know that I'm in love with you," he said, "It's a fact. So, make me the happiest man in the world and marry me."_

_Brooke bit her bottom lip as Nathan took her left hand, "I love you so much."_

"_Then be my wife," Nathan stated, "Brooke Davis, will you be my wife?"_

_Brooke nodded, "Yes," she exclaimed as Nathan slid the ring on her finger. They both smiled and Brooke jumped up into his arms; they kissed each other passionately._

**xxx**

Brooke felt the sunshine beam down on her as she stretched out her arms tiredly. She opened one eye and saw Nathan looking down at her; Brooke laughed and rubbed her eyes, "What?" She asked.

"Nothing," he said, "I was just watching you sleep…"

Brooke kissed Nathan softly on the lips, "I was just thinking about the night that you proposed to me," she said; Nathan smiled as Brooke looked around their room, "Can you believe that this is how it's always going to be? Me and you…"

"It's great isn't it?" Nathan said as he stroked Brooke's arm, "It's beautiful outside…Why don't we go on the beach?" Brooke took Nathan's hand as they walked out of the bedroom.

Nathan opened the back door and saw Brooke's dad standing there with his hands in his pockets and a scowl on his face; Brooke looked at her dad in confusion, "Dad?" She questioned, "What are you doing here?"

"Dan told me you two would be living down here," he began and then looked at Brooke, "I'm here because I'm trying to stop you from making a big mistake…"

Brooke grabbed a hold of Nathan's arm and looked down at the ground, "What are you talking about?" She asked, "I'm in love with Nathan."

"Brooke," her dad began, "Honey, I don't want you to get hurt…That's why I want you to come back to New York with me."

"Mr. Davis," Nathan began, "I swear to you that I am not going to hurt Brooke in anyway."

Mr. Davis glared at Nathan, "You stay out of this punk! You're the reason my daughter is making this stupid decision!"

"Dad!" Brooke yelled, "You have no right to come here like this and tell me how to live my life!"

Brooke's dad gave the both of them a disgusted look and then put his sunglasses on, "I will **not** walk you down that aisle," he threatened and then barged off.

Nathan rubbed Brooke's shoulder as she cried onto his chest, "I'm sorry about that," she cried.

"Don't worry about it," Nathan said as he tried to calm her down, "Come on," he said as he led Brooke to the beach.

Brooke and Nathan sat on the blanket he had laid out, and they faced the ocean. Brooke looked down and saw a stack of chocolate chip pancakes; her eyes widened and she squealed, "My favorite!"

"I know," Nathan said as he fed her a piece, "You once told me that the only things you ever needed in life were a stack of chocolate chip pancakes and…"

"A shot of tequila," Brooke said finishing off the sentence with a smile; she ran her fingers through her hair and looked at Nathan, "You still _amaze_ me," she said softly.

Nathan kissed her passionately, "And you amaze _me_," he said with a light chuckle.

**xxx**

Peyton woke up suddenly and looked over and saw Lucas looking out her window; Lucas heard her move around and he turned around quickly, "I didn't wake you up did I?" Lucas asked.

"No," Peyton said and then sat up in her bed, "How long have you been awake?"

Lucas shrugged, "Half an hour or so," he said, "I was looking at some of your drawings…" He said and held up one of him and Peyton.

"Did you sleep on the couch?" Peyton asked.

Lucas nodded, "I though you would want me to…" He began but stopped, "I thought you would want to be alone, 'cause of the while Nikki, Jake, Jenny thing."

"That's not my business anymore," Peyton began, "I mean, sure, I care about Jenny and her well-being, but…Jake told me that he could handle it."

Lucas looked over at Peyton, "You talked to him?"

"I called him when Nikki came by," Peyton began, "I wanted to know if he wanted me to tell Nikki where he was."

Lucas sighed, "You can't protect him forever Peyt."

"I'm just being a friend Luke," Peyton said defensively, "Nikki is a horrible person, and she doesn't deserve Jenny."

Lucas looked at Peyton in disbelief, "Who are you to judge? I mean, for all we know she could be a great mom!"

"Why the hell are you sticking up for her?" Peyton spat.

"You're **not** Jenny's mother," Lucas said; Peyton put her head down in hurt, "So stop trying to be."

Peyton glared at him, "Get the **fuck** out of my room!" She screamed.

"I know that was out of line," Lucas began as he started to stand up and head towards Peyton's bed.

Peyton wiped her tears and moved away from him, "**Don't come near me!**" She said through gritted teeth, "You have no idea about what it is to love someone and then have your heart broken!"

"I dated you didn't I?" Lucas shot back; Peyton snapped her head up and looked at him. Lucas rolled his eyes and left the room.

**xxx**

Peyton sat on the beach and looked out onto the ocean; the waves came crashing down as the sky above her started to turn a dark grey. She noticed the clouds covering up the sun, but she didn't mind she wasn't in a sunny kind of mood.

"I brought you a beer," she heard Nathan say as he sat down beside her.

Peyton smiled weakly and took a long sip of the beer, "Thanks," she said; her voice weak from crying.

"How are you?" Nathan asked, which made Peyton laugh.

"Well," Peyton began sarcastically, "I have no boyfriend…And the guy that I left my boyfriend for doesn't want anything to do with me."

Nathan winced, he could feel Peyton's pain, "I'm sorry Peyton," he offered.

"Let's change the subject," Peyton said and then took another sip of her beer, "How are things with you and Miss. Brooke?"

Nathan chuckled, "Really…Really good," he said, "Her dad came by this morning and had a little go at us about the whole marriage thing."

"Her dad was always an ass about things that were important to Brooke," Peyton said sympathetically, "What did he do? Threaten to kill you or something?" She teased.

Nathan sighed, "Worse. He told Brooke that he wasn't going to walk her down the aisle…"

"Ouch," Peyton groaned, "What a jackass!"

Nathan nodded, "I don't get it," he said, "I would never hurt Brooke…I mean, I know we've been through a lot but we love each other."

"Don't listen to her dad," Peyton advised, "He's a drunk, and he's an unhappy, lonely man."

"I just want Brooke to know that I do love her," Nathan said, half worry in his voice, half eagerness.

Peyton smiled and put her hand on Nathan's shoulder, "I think she knows," she said and then got up and walked away.

**xxx**

Brooke sat at the river court and cried quietly to herself. Her own dad, her own flesh and blood told her that he didn't want to walk his own daughter down the aisle. Brooke bit her bottom lip **hard**, just to feel the pain for a little bit. She looked up at the sky, desperately wishing that her mother was alive.

She felt a warm hand on her shoulder, Brooke turned around and saw Nathan and Keith standing there, "Hi," Brooke said as she wiped her tears away.

"I don't want anyone to ruin our wedding," Nathan began, "So since your dad doesn't approve of this marriage, I found someone that does," Keith smiled at Brooke.

Brooke smiled weakly, "I don't get it…"

"I'll walk you down the aisle Brooke," Keith offered, "It would be an absolute honor to walk you down the aisle, especially since Nathan is my little nephew."

Brooke's eyes glowed, "You would do that for me?"

"Of course," Keith said; Brooke jumped up and hugged him.

"Thank you so much," Brooke whispered in his ear, "You have no idea how much this means to me."

The hug broke and Keith put his hands on Brooke's shoulders, "I think I do," he said with a small wink and smirk. He looked between Nathan and Brooke and clapped, "I think you two need some alone time," he said.

They both laughed and Brooke gave him one last hug, "Thank you!"

"You're welcome," Keith said and then waved goodbye to the couple.

Brooke focused on Nathan and put her arms around his neck, "Did you do this for me?" She asked.

"I want you to be happy," Nathan said as he gripped her hips, "Because the last thing I want to see is my beautiful fiancée upset."

Brooke smiled and kissed Nathan passionately, "I love you," she said with tears in her eyes.

"I love you too," Nathan said.

**xxx**

Lucas walked into Peyton's house; he was upset with himself at how things had ended between the two of them. He walked up to Peyton's room and saw Peyton lying on her bed, "Peyton," he began, but she didn't move. Lucas walked over to her and sat on the edge of her bed, "Peyton," he said again. Lucas looked over at the bottle of pills on her dresser and then bottle of empty Vodka lying beside her; Lucas panicked and put his hand over his mouth. He opened his cell phone immediately and called 911, "Hi…My friend overdosed on pills," he said, and then gave the 911 operator all the information needed, "Hurry up!" He yelled and then shut the phone quickly. His eyes watered as he looked at the picture that was beside Peyton. It was a picture of Peyton with broken hears around her and a big L with the words, **HE'LL NEVER LOVE ME AGAIN.**

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	23. The Side Effects Of Love

**The Bitter Taste**

**The Side Effects Of Love**

_Charlotte Bronte once said better to be without logic than without feeling._

**xxx**

Peyton laid in the hospital bed as she opened her eyes slowly. She looked over and saw Nathan sitting beside her bed reading a drug rehab brochure.

He looked up at her, "How are you feeling?"

"Tired," Peyton yawned and then eyed the brochures, "I'm guessing those aren't for you…"

Nathan looked at her seriously, "Peyton, you know how I felt when my mom was abusing pills."

"Nathan," Peyton said sympathetically, "I almost forgot about that…"

Nathan sighed, "You could've died Peyton!"

"I was upset and I wasn't thinking," Peyton began, "I mean, Lucas came by and…"

Nathan cut her off abruptly, "You did this because of Lucas?" He asked, "Hell, you dated me and I put you through so much more shit."

Peyton chuckled lightly, "That's because we weren't in…" She began, but then stopped.

"In love," Nathan finished with a soft smile.

Peyton cleared her throat, "I didn't mean it like that."

"Don't worry about it," Nathan assured her, "I was an ass back then anyways."

Peyton laughed, "You weren't an ass. You were just caught up with all your basketball crap," she said, "But you have changed…"

Brooke walked into the room with a cup of coffee in one hand, and balled up tissues in the other. "Here come the water works," Peyton teased.

Brooke wiped her eyes and ran over to Peyton, "I was so worried!" She cried.

"I'm okay," Peyton said as Brooke cried and mumbled incoherently on her shoulder.

Brooke looked up at Peyton and sat on Nathan's lap, "Do you know how worried I was?"

"By the looks of it I'm guessing **really** worried," Peyton joked.

Brooke wiped her eyes and glared at Peyton, "This isn't funny P. Sawyer…"

"I know," Peyton said as she took Brooke's hand in hers, "I just…I joke around in time of crisis, you know me."

Brooke trembled lightly as she looked at her best friend; they had been friends for as long as Brooke could remember. Sure, Peyton had the whole cocaine incident, but since that she had been clean. Brooke never thought of Peyton as a girl who would turn to drugs; when Peyton was upset she would just go up to her room and blare her god-awful music and draw.

The three of them laughed and talked as they went over old high school memories; Nathan and Brooke were trying to get Peyton's mind off the whole incident. Peyton was cracking up until Lucas walked into the room; the whole room went quiet while Lucas stood there with his hands in his jean pockets.

Brooke took Nathan's hand and the two of them got up and walked out of the room, "Do you think we should leave those two alone?" Nathan asked.

"They need to talk," Brooke said; her voice hushed and low, "Besides, if Peyton does kill him then we're already _in_ a hospital so," she said as the two of them laughed.

Lucas walked closer to Peyton and put the sketch on her bed, "I found this next to you when I found you."

"Oh," Peyton said softly as she looked at it, "What are you doing here?"

Lucas sighed, "I am so, **so** sorry about how we ended things," he began, "I had no right to say those things to you…"

"This isn't going to work Luke," Peyton said as she let out a deep breath, "When I held those pills in my hand, all I could think about was how much being with you hurts me…And I know that I haven't been fair to you, and that's why I don't want to be with you anymore."

Lucas looked away from her, "I just want to know if things are okay between us…Because I know that I'm the reason you tried to kill yourself."

"We can be friends," Peyton offered, "Everything has been so difficult lately…"

Lucas looked back at her and Peyton could see the hurt and pain in his face, "I should've known that we would end this sooner or later…"

"I'm sorry Luke," she said in almost a whisper, "I don't have the strength for this anymore." Lucas nodded and then walked out of the room; Peyton sighed and rested deeper in her bed covers.

**xxx**

Brooke laid on the beach and looked up at the only star in the sky; it was big and bright. Brooke closed her eyes and let out a well deserved yawn. She felt an arm wrap around her waist, Brooke giggled and opened her eyes. Nathan laid beside her with his icy, blue eyes cutting into her.

"Interesting day," Brooke said with a small laugh.

Nathan squeezed Brooke tighter against him as the wind blew against the couple, "It's Tree Hill," he began and then laughed, "I'm so glad that you came to see me when I was in the hospital…"

"I love you," Brooke said as she kissed Nathan passionately.

Nathan smiled and reached into his pocket and pulled out a long, velvet black box; Brooke looked at it in confusion as Nathan handed it to her. Brooke opened the long, slim box and saw a beautiful diamond bracelet sparkling up at her; her jaw dropped and she looked up at Nathan, "I saw it, and I knew you'd have to have it…"

"It's beautiful," Brooke said in awe, "You didn't have to get this for me."

Nathan helped Brooke with the bracelet and smiled, "I want you to know that I am deeply in love with you…"

Brooke's smiled fell and she looked down at the ground, "Excuse me," she said softly and then ran up to the beach house. Nathan watched her run and followed her.

He ran onto the balcony and saw Brooke looking out into the ocean crying; Nathan went over and wrapped his arms around her waist, "Brooke," he said, "Whatever I did I'm sorry…"

"You didn't do anything," Brooke said as she turned towards him and rested her hand on his smooth cheek, "I don't want our relationship to be based on gifts…I mean, my mom married my dad for his money, and then the whole Felix thing…"

Nathan gave her a confused look and then sighed, "I bought you the bracelet because I thought you would like it…"

"I do like it," Brooke said as she looked down at her wrist, "I love it; actually…I just don't want you to think you have to buy me stuff."

Nathan stroked the bracelet and then cupped Brooke's face, "I love **you**, not the materialistic things, just **you**," Nathan said sincerely and then kissed Brooke passionately; the kiss broke and Nathan looked down in Brooke's eyes, "I'll take the bracelet back if you want me too."

"You don't have to," Brooke said as she bit her bottom lip with playful eyes.

Nathan laughed, "You look amazing in it, so…I think I'll just let you suffer by wearing it."

**xxx**

"It's nerves Brooke," Peyton said as she looked through drug rehab brochures.

Brooke groaned, "I feel stupid…"

"Don't," Peyton said as she slapped Brooke's knee, "Here's some good news! I found this _awesome_ rehab centre in New York," she said sarcastically.

"You do understand how awful that sounds right?" Brooke asked, "How long are you going to be in New York?"

Peyton shrugged, "It says in the brochure that the whole clinic is about two weeks."

"You do realize what's in four weeks?" Brooke whined.

Peyton laughed, "Yes! My best friend's wedding!"

"And this far away trip to New York wouldn't have anything to do with…" Brooke began.

Peyton cut her off, "Nope!"

"I didn't even finish," Brooke argued with a smirk.

Peyton glared at her, "Lucas and I are over!"

"I wasn't even going to say his name," Brooke teased.

Peyton scoffed, "You're a bitch."

"I know," Brooke said and then stuck out her tongue, "Try to meet some hot guys."

Peyton rolled her eyes, "Dating is not really on my radar right now. I'm just going to worry about this rehab thing, and your wedding."

"You're going to be okay," Brooke assured her.

Peyton leaned against Brooke as a tear rolled down her cheek, "Thanks," she said softly.

**xxx**

Nathan put up a jump shot as Lucas walked towards the court; Nathan looked at him, "Hey man."

"Hey," Lucas said, "I heard Peyton's home."

Nathan nodded, "Yeah, Brooke's there right now," he said as Luke put his head down, "You're not feeling guilty are you?"

"Yeah," Lucas began, "I'm an ass."

Nathan chuckled, "Maybe eighty percent of the time," he joked, "But this Peyton thing…It wasn't your fault, man."

"Sometimes I really wonder why we all stay here," Lucas said, "All it causes is bull shit drama like this."

**xxx**

Lucas walked into Peyton's room as she packed her suitcase. Lucas knocked on the doorframe and Peyton turned around with her face red from crying.

"Hi," Peyton said in almost a whisper.

Lucas put his hands in his pockets, "Hi," he said, "Are you leaving…?"

"Tonight," Peyton finished.

Lucas nodded to himself, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Peyton lied, "Are you?" Lucas looked up at her with a sad look on his face, "Sorry…"

Luke cleared his throat, "Well, I just came by to say goodbye and good luck so…"

"It doesn't have to be like this," Peyton began, "We can be friends," she said with forced enthusiasm.

Lucas sighed as the lines on his forehead became apparent, "I don't this so Peyton," he said as Peyton's face turned to sadness, "Because it's too hard," Lucas said sadly and then walked out of the room.

Peyton bit her bottom lip and turned back towards her suitcase; she closed it and headed outside towards her car. She got in and turned the key to the ignition. The car started and Peyton pulled out of her driveway and turned the radio up loud.

**xxx**

Brooke walked into Lucas's room as he sat on his computer looking at Peyton's web came. Brooke put a hand on his shoulder and he looked up at her; his eyes red and moist.

"Maybe this is good for us," he began, "So much has happened between us, that maybe it's right for us to take a break."

Brooke sighed, "You guys can always be friends," she offered.

"It wouldn't ever work," Lucas said, "That's the same thing Peyton told me, and I told her that it was too hard."

Brooke gave him a concerned look, "You know, things are going to work out…No matter what happens they're going to work out."

"I want her to be happy," Lucas said, "And with me…She's not happy, she's fucking suicidal!"

Brooke took a step back, "She made a mistake," Brooke said through gritted teeth, "She thought that swallowing those pills would stop the pain, but it didn't!" She yelled, "And now, Peyton is paying for the consequences!"

"You don't think I know that?" Lucas yelled back, "I take full responsibility for this, because I'm the one that hurt her!"

Brooke rubbed her temples, "I don't want to fight right now Luke," she said honestly, "We just have to be supportive of Peyton right now, and we have to help her get through this."

"I know," Lucas began, "I just don't know if she wants me to be part of her life anymore."

**xxx**

Peyton walked into the rehabilitation centre after a long drive to New York. The drive was good for her because it had given her the opportunity to really think; which is something she had done in awhile. She looked around at all the people and realized that they were just every day, normal people who had done stupid things. She looked over to the lobby and saw a guy sitting there listening to headphones, they were loud enough so that Peyton could hear the instruments blaring from them. He was fair skinned, and had brown hair which he had spiked. The guy had a black bracelet on, and a Get Up Kid's t-shirt. Peyton smiled to herself and sat down beside him; the guy took off his headphones and smirked at Peyton.

"What are you in for?" He asked her.

Peyton crossed her legs, "I overdosed…"

"A guy reason?" He asked.

Peyton smirked, "Yeah…How did you know?"

"I'm here because of my cocaine addiction," he began, "I started doing the drug because of my old girlfriend…"

Peyton bit her bottom lip, "I'm Peyton."

"Eric," the guy said, "You listen to the Get Up Kids?"

Peyton smiled and nodded, "Of course," Peyton said as she looked through his CD collection, "God, I have all off these!"

"About time I found a girl with the same musical taste as me," Eric said with a genuine smile, "My last girlfriend listened to Britney Spears non stop."

Peyton laughed out loud, "Oh god! Poor you."

"It was horrible," Eric laughed, "I mean, I would put on The Shins, or some Modest Mouse and she would turn it off and put on that Britney shit."

Peyton shook her head and rolled her eyes, "My last boyfriend liked the same music as me, and so did my other boyfriend."

"Other boyfriend?" Eric questioned.

Peyton giggled nervously, "Uh, yeah…I have a complicated love situation…"

"Well let me take you out for coffee after this and maybe we can talk more," he offered.

Peyton looked down at the ground and then met his eyes, "That would be fun…Thanks."

"It'll be my treat," Eric said, "Besides, I think I'm going to have to watch you, girl." They're eyes met and the two of them smiled at each other; and for once Peyton didn't feel the need to leave.

**Read and Review, please.**

_Sorry for the late update everyone! I hope you enjoy the chapter!_


	24. Sometimes You Just Know

**The Bitter Taste**

**Sometimes You Just Know**

_We don't stop loving someone; we just learn how to live without them._

**xxx**

"Her name was Cassie," Eric began as the two of them sipped their coffee's, "Her dad was the principal at our high school, and her mom was my English teacher…"

Peyton squinted, "Ouch…"

"Yeah," Eric said with a sigh, "Her dad hated me because I was into the whole musician thing…"

Peyton smiled, "Like you are now?"

"It was worse," Eric laughed, "Anyway…Her dad and mom kept watch on me, and somehow through it all we stayed together for three years."

Peyton looked at him in amazement, "Wow," she said, "It seemed like you guys were really in love."

"We were," he said with a small twinkle in his icy, blue eyes, "But…It ended and that's how I ended up here."

Peyton crossed her arms and looked down at the table, "I tried cocaine once…Back in high school."

"It's a stupid drug," Eric said.

Peyton nodded, "I took it because my one boyfriend, Jake, left Tree Hill because his ex-girlfriend bitch took their baby and ran off."

"Whoa," Eric questioned, "Baby?"

Peyton laughed nervously, "Yeah, he had a baby girl…Her name was Jenny…And then recently, I had a boyfriend named Lucas…And everything was just so fucked up with him, and I ended up overdosing on some pills because of it."

"Shit happens right?" Eric offered.

Peyton looked up at him and bit her bottom lip, "Right," she began with a genuine smile.

**xxx**

Brooke and Nathan walked into a church near by as they talked to the reverend that they had booked to do their wedding; the reverend smiled and wished the two their best's, and then let the two of them explore the church a bit.

Brooke walked up to the altar and smiled, "Can you believe that we're going to be up here pretty soon?" She asked as Nathan came up behind her.

"It's incredible," Nathan said as he wrapped his arms around her waist, "This is almost surreal."

Brooke smiled, "I know," she began, "I'm going to be Brooke Penelope Scott, and I'm going to be your _wife_," she said in awe, "I've never been a wife before!"

"And I've never been a husb-…Oh wait never mind," Nathan kidded; Brooke laughed and turned to face him, "You're beautiful…"

Brooke bit her bottom lip and smiled shyly, "Stop," Brooke said playfully.

The two of them walked into the beach house and saw Chris Kellar standing on the deck looking out onto the beach. Brooke and Nathan looked at each other in confusion and then walked over towards him. Chris turned around and smirked at the two of them, "I should've figured the two of you would shack up together sooner or later…"

"What the hell are you doing here Chris?" Brooke asked coldly, "Did Haley send you?"

Chris nodded at Nathan, "You've got a feisty one here," he said and then winked at Brooke, "Did you ever think that maybe I just came here to see you?"

"Cut the shit," Brooke snapped, "Now. What are you doing here?"

Chris groaned, "We just wanted to come by Tree Hill and see how everyone's doing."

"We?" Nathan asked.

Haley walked out from the kitchen as Nathan and Brooke stared at her in disbelief, "Hi," she said softly.

"What is going on here?" Brooke asked as she looked at Chris and then back at Haley, "Tell me this is just some sort of sick joke."

Chris walked away from the group shaking his head, "I came by to see Luke," Haley said, "And then I drove past the beach house and saw the cars and…"

"And were hoping that I fell of a cliff and died," Brooke finished coldly, "Well sorry sweetheart, but I'm alive and kicking, and Nathan and I are actually…Married," Brooke said with a smile as she held up her left hand and showed Haley the ring.

Chris whistled as he walked back into the room with a sandwich in his hand, "Damn," he said.

"I thought you and Chris were getting married?" Nathan asked as he put his arm around Brooke's waist.

Haley and Chris looked at each other and smiled, "Whoa dude," Chris began, "We never said that we weren't married…Why do you people always assume that Haley wants to get back together with Nathan?"

"Because that's usually how it goes isn't it?" Brooke asked, "Haley comes back and tries to ruin everything, and then tries to lure Nathan back into her world…I won't let it happen Haley…I'm sorry, but I'm not going to let you take him away from me because he is the best damn thing that has happened to me in awhile!"

Haley watched as Nathan kissed the top of Brooke's forehead; Brooke looked up at him and they shared a look. A look that Haley noticed her and Nathan had never shared, "Can we talk?" Haley asked Brooke, "Outside…"

Brooke and Haley walked out onto the beach; Haley sat down as the wind blew her hair back. After a few seconds Brooke sat down beside her and wiped her eyes, "Aren't you happy with being away from here? I mean isn't that what you wanted in the first place?" Brooke questioned.

"I used to come back here just to see Nathan," Haley started, "But it isn't like that now…I came by to see Luke this time, and I am more than happy for you and Nate."

Brooke crossed her arms and looked down at the sand, "I love him Hales…More than anything in the world…"

"I know," Haley said with a little pain in her voice, "I watched the two of you earlier and I saw how much he cared for you…Nathan never was like that with me; I mean maybe in the beginning stages of the relationship, but it didn't last…He wants to be with you Brooke, and I'm happy for you two."

Brooke finally looked at Haley and smiled, "So is this some sort of truce or something?"

"It's not over till someone cries," Haley said with a wide smile.

Brooke hugged Haley as the two of them cried, "Then I guess it's over," Brooke said.

"Oh come on," they heard Chris say behind them, "Look Nate, they're already cheating on us."

Haley threw sand at Chris and laughed, "Shut up!"

The four of them walked into the parking lot as Chris and Haley were about to get into the car. Haley looked up at Nathan and smiled, "So I guess everything's okay?"

"Yeah," Nathan said with a nod, "You be careful alright?"

Haley nodded and kissed Nathan on the cheek, "You and Brooke deserve each other," she whispered into his ear.

"Thanks," Nathan said as he opened Haley's door for her; Haley smiled as he shut the door and waved goodbye to the two of them.

Brooke and Nathan watched the car pull out of the driveway; Brooke cuddled closely up to Nathan and then smirked up at him, "That was oddly enjoyable," she said.

"Yeah," Nathan said as he kissed the top of Brooke's nose, "Let's go," he said as he nudged Brooke.

Brooke bit her bottom lip playfully and pulled Nathan towards the house by his shirt collar, "This whole thing has kind of got me in the mood," she said suggestively.

"Me too," Nathan said with a wink as the two of them stumbled into the house.

**xxx**

Haley walked into Lucas's room as he laid on his back and listened to his MP3 player; Haley smiled and jumped on top of him. Lucas's eyes opened and he looked up at Haley, "Oh my god!" Lucas exclaimed as he took out his ear phones, "What…What are you doing here?"

"Hey to you too," Haley said with a smile, "I actually came down to see you!"

Lucas smiled, "You're kidding?"

"Nope," Haley said with a smile as she high fived Lucas, "How are things going for you?"

Lucas looked at Haley's ring and raised his brows, "Obviously not as good as things are for you…"

"Chris and I got married," Haley said, "I mean we finally did it…"

Lucas sat up and sighed, "Did you see Brooke and Nathan?"

"Yeah," Haley said with a small smile, "We worked things out…Finally."

Lucas nodded to himself and gave Haley a big hug, "I missed you," he said sincerely.

"Where's Peyton?" Haley said as she wiped her eyes.

Lucas looked down at the ground and started to pace, "Peyton and I broke up, and then recently she overdosed on a bottle of pills after a little fight we had…She's in a drug rehab clinic in New York for a couple weeks."

"Oh god Luke," Haley said as she gave him another big hug, "Is she okay? I mean..."

Lucas shrugged, "Yeah she's okay…"

"Are you okay?" Haley asked sincerely.

Lucas looked down at the ground, "I can't help but think this is all my fault…"

"You're a great guy," Haley said with a smile, "Don't start blaming yourself for this because I don't want you to live in guilt forever okay?"

Lucas smiled, "Okay," he said and then gave Haley one last hug, "This is when we say our goodbye's right?"

"Yeah," Haley said sadly as the hug broke, "If you ever need anything just call my cell phone alright?"

Lucas kissed Haley's forehead, "Alright," he said and then laughed to himself, "Can you believe that awhile ago it was me and you? Just me and you."

"It's weird," Haley said as she looked around his room and then spotted a picture of her and Luke from high school, "Burn that," she teased.

Lucas looked at that picture and laughed, "You were so innocent."

"As were you," Haley said as she headed towards the door, "I love you Luke…"

Lucas dug his hands in his pockets, "I love you too…"

**Read and Review.**


	25. We Went For A Ride

**The Bitter Taste**

**We Went For A Ride**

**-Thanks for all the reviews!**

_**Italics are flashbacks**_

_Just like you can't steal second with one foot on first, you can't move on to find new true love, if you're still holding onto the past!_

**xxx**

Eric and Peyton walked out of the drug rehab clinic; Peyton groaned, "I really don't like that place."

"It's a drug rehab clinic," Eric laughed, "I don't think we're supposed to like it."

Peyton laughed; she had only one more week left in the clinic, and then she was back to Tree Hill to get ready for Brooke and Nathan's wedding. Peyton had talked to Brooke earlier in the week; Brooke had told her about the Chris and Haley encounter, and she told Brooke about Eric. Peyton and Eric had become good friends over the week, and they both really needed each other.

"What are you thinking about?" Eric asked when they had reached his apartment.

Peyton bit her bottom lip, "This is such a dumb question…And you probably have plans…"

"Peyton," Eric stated, "My only plans so far are to hang out with you," he said sincerely.

Peyton smiled graciously, "Well my best friend is getting married a week after we get out of rehab, and I was wondering if you would go with me."

"Are you asking me to be your date?" Eric teased.

Peyton blushed, "Yes I'm asking you to be my date."

"So should we hold hands and fondle each other the whole night and then make out at the reception?" Eric asked with a goofy grin.

Peyton slapped him playfully, "We can just go as friends."

"What if I want it to be a date?" Eric said and then looked down at the ground.

Peyton looked at him in confusion, "You're a great guy Eric, but…I'm just trying to focus on getting my life back in order," she said apologetically.

"Then we'll go as friends," Eric said with fake happiness. Peyton smiled and then walked towards her hotel, Eric's smile fell as she turned the corner.

**xxx**

Brooke walked into the beach house and saw Nathan napping on the couch. Brooke smiled to herself and set down her purse and bags. She straddled Nathan slowly and kissed him.

Nathan's eyes opened and he yawned, "Hey baby, where were you?"

"I had some wedding stuff to do," Brooke exclaimed as she clapped her hands together twice.

Nathan laughed, "Is everything pretty much ready?"

"We still need someone to sing a couple songs at the reception, and Peyton told me she would bring a few mixes," Brooke began, and then stopped when she saw the gleam in Nathan's eyes, "What?"

Nathan shrugged, "I was thinking maybe you could sing…"

"Nate," Brooke cooed, "I would love to sing at our wedding," she gushed.

Nathan caressed Brooke's and she kissed his hand, "Luke's been working on his best man speech for days."

"You know, Peyton met a guy up in New York," Brooke said as she raised her brows.

Nathan looked at her in suspicion, "She met him at rehab?"

"Yeah," Brooke said apprehensively off Nathan's look, "He's a great guy, and Peyton thinks really highly of him."

Nathan sighed and cuddled closer to Brooke, "I guess I'll take your word for it."

"Do you think we'll have kids?" Brooke asked as she traced her fingers down Nathan's arm, "I mean could you imagine little Nathan's and Brooke's?"

Nathan chuckled, "Kids would be great, but let's work on this whole getting married thing first."

"You're right," Brooke said and then closed her eyes, "I love you," she yawned.

Nathan smiled and then closed his eyes, "I love you too, yawny…"

**xxx**

_Brooke walked up to Nathan's apartment and opened the door; her jaw dropped and her eyes got big. In front of her was Nathan and Haley; the sight made her want to throw up. Nathan's eyes were filled with sympathy and compassion, while Haley's were filled with payback and rejoice._

_Brooke dropped her purse and backed up out of the apartment; she slammed the door shut and tearfully made her way towards her car. She didn't know whether to drive off a cliff or run over Nathan and Haley._

_The footsteps behind her got closer and closer, but Brooke didn't turn around at all. She heard Nathan call her name, but that only made her go faster; finally she felt a strong hand grip her arm. Brooke turned around and stood there face to face with a guy that had confessed his love to her every single fucking day. _

_He went to say something, but stopped. There was nothing he could say that would sound the least bit understandable. Brooke rolled her eyes and turned towards her car; Nathan stepped in front of her so that she couldn't reach the door handle._

"_Let me in my car Nathan," Brooke said in a monotone voice that sent shivers up and down Nathan's spine._

_Nathan looked down at her, "Let me explain…"_

"_Explain what?" Brooke screamed, finally her voice showing some sort of emotion, "Explain the fact that yesterday you told me that I was the love of your life, and now your wife is back?"_

_Nathan sighed, "Everything just got screwed up Brooke."_

"_No shit," Brooke yelled and then crossed her arms tightly around her chest, "She left you for another guy, and I was there for you through everything Nate," she cried, "I **loved** you!"_

_Nathan felt his heart ache, "I know," he said sincerely._

"_Tell me you don't love me," Brooke said through gritted teeth; Nathan looked down at the ground and Brooke pushed him against the car, "**Tell me!**"_

_Nathan grabbed Brooke's wrist in effort to stop her from pushing him, "Don't do this Brooke," he said as she struggled against his grip._

"_Don't touch me!" Brooke cried as she pulled away from his grip and ran her hand through her hair, "I can't believe you would do something like this to me…"_

_Nathan walked towards her and put his hand out to wipe a tear from her cheek, "I lo—," he began._

"_Shut your god damn mouth," Brooke said as she slapped his hand away, "You don't know what love is!"_

_Nathan put his hands in his pockets and backed up, "Please Brooke, things just happened…Haley showed up here this morning and…"_

"_I don't want to know the details," Brooke said coldly, "Frankly, I don't give a damn if she showed up on a magical unicorn and fucked you up the ass with a golden dildo," she spat and then took a deep breath, "I don't ever want to see you again, and I don't care how cliché that sounds, it's true!" Brooke exclaimed and then got into her car._

_Nathan couldn't do anything but watched as Brooke drove off in her car; he walked back up to his apartment and sat down on the couch beside Haley._

_Brooke walked into her house and started to pack immediately, the anger and frustration inside of her was too much for her to handle. This was different than the Lucas-Peyton thing; she had fallen for Nathan and she had fallen for him hard. Brooke brought her suitcase out to her car and drove off with a couple hundred dollar bills in her pocket._

_She passed the apartment complex Nathan was living at and shed a tear; nothing was working out for her. Brooke drove and drove until she reached New York. She parked her car in front of a bar and walked in and saw a guy immediately giving her looks from the bar. "Welcome to my new life," Brooke said to herself and walked over to the bar._

**Read and Review.**

**-Sorry if it's so short, but the next chapter is going to be the wedding so expect that to be long. **


	26. Baby, You Amaze Me

**The Bitter Taste**

**Baby, You Amaze Me**

**-A/N- The italics in the last chapter (We Went For A Ride) is a flashback. It's the flashback of what actually happened between Nathan and Brooke the night Brooke left for New York. I'm sorry for not explaining that better, and I hope you guys understand now. Anyways, thanks for all the reviews, you guys are the best! And please keep reviewing, they really make my day!**

_To let go isn't to forget, not think about, or ignore. It doesn't leave feelings of anger, jealousy, or regret. Letting go isn't winning. It isn't losing. It's not about pride. It's not obsessing or dwelling on the past. It's about loss and it's not defeat. To let go is to cherish memories, but to overcome them and move one. Letting go is accepting. Letting go is having the courage to accept change, the strength to keep moving. Letting go is growing up._

**xxx**

Eric followed Peyton into her room as she threw her luggage onto to her bed and immediately turned on her stereo. She walked over to her computer and turned on her web came.

Eric set down his suitcase on the floor and looked on the walls, "Damn chick, you are an **artist**," he complimented.

"Thanks," Peyton smiled and then leaned against the doorframe of her closet.

Eric looked at her web came and laughed, "You have a web cam?" He asked in disbelief, "Who would've thought Peyton Sawyer had a kinky side?"

"Shut up," Peyton giggled as she sat down on her bed, "I just have a web cam so people can watch me draw…I've had it ever since high school."

Eric waved at the web cam and then winked at it, "Maybe I can get one, so that I can pick up some hotties," he teased.

"I'd be careful with web cams," Peyton warned, "I cheated with my friend Brooke's boyfriend and she found out cause we forgot to turn off the web cam…"

Eric whistled, "Naughty," he said and then sat down beside Peyton on the bed, "Are you nervous about seeing Lucas?"

"Yeah," Peyton said as she cracked her knuckles, "We didn't exactly leave on a good note."

Eric put his hand on Peyton's knee, "I don't think Lucas realizes how jealous I am of him…"

"Why?" Peyton said as she turned away from him to hide her tears.

Eric put his two fingers under Peyton's chin and turned her towards him, "You're amazing Peyton," he said sincerely, "And I'm not just kissing your ass because you're an amazingly hot blonde," Peyton let out a laugh, "I'm saying that because I mean it, and I'm glad that I met you."

Without thinking Peyton pulled Eric's face towards hers and kissed him passionately; Eric returned the kiss as he traced the bottom of Peyton's tongue with his tongue. Peyton moaned in pleasure as they're hands explored each other's bodies; it just felt good to be touched. The sexual tension between the two of them grew more intense as Peyton laid back; Eric got on top of her as they kissed each other forcefully. Peyton heard a knock on her bedroom door; she looked over and saw Lucas standing there.

Eric stopped kissing her and looked over as well; he looked down at Peyton and knew that the blonde hair guy standing there was Lucas. They both wiped their lips and turned away from each other as if they were in 9th grade getting caught by their fathers. Peyton looked at Lucas and then back at Eric; Eric patted her knee and walked out of the room. Lucas didn't even look at Eric as he passed him; his eyes stayed locked on Peyton.

Peyton sat up as Lucas closed the door behind him; he was nervous, Peyton could tell. She was uncomfortable, Lucas could tell. The unbearable tension was detectable between the two ex lovers. Peyton cleared her throat, and Lucas scratched the top of his head.

"So I guess rehab was fun," Lucas finally said, the bitterness from his voice sent shivers up and down Peyton's spine.

Peyton shook her head, "No, it wasn't," she said.

"Who was that?" Lucas asked.

Peyton sighed, "That's Eric…I met him at rehab, and we became really good friends."

"Friends?" Lucas questioned, "I would've thought by the way you two were groping each other on your bed that it was something more."

Peyton got up and turned off her web cam, "Don't do this to me Luke," she said, her voice tired and torn, "We just got caught up in the moment, we've become really, really close over the last two weeks."

"I didn't know that you were going to have another date to the wedding," he began, "I thought--."

Peyton cut him off, "You thought we would go together?" She asked and then looked at him in disbelief, "We used to be able to talk about everything but now it's impossible to even start a decent conversation with you...You can't deny it, things have changed…We've grown apart and you have to face the fact that I will no longer be there every single time you need me…"

"I really thought we could work things out Peyt," Lucas said with a pleading look in his eyes.

Peyton bit her bottom lip and looked away from him, "It's done, and it has been for awhile…Let me go, let **this** go."

"Fine," Lucas said as he opened the bedroom door, "I'll let it go…" He said and then walked out.

**xxx**

Peyton walked into the bride's room of the church where Brooke stood there in front of a full length mirror with four bridesmaids around her; a tear came to Peyton's eye as she looked at her best friend. Finally, one of them was getting married, this was a day that Peyton and Brooke had talked about since they were six.

Brooke turned around and smiled as she saw her best friend of forever standing there with tears in her eyes, "If you start crying, I'm going to cry," Brooke said sadly; Peyton smiled and walked over to Brooke and the two best friends hugged.

"I heard as the maid of honor I have to come in here and convince you that you're crazy and then have you drive off to Vegas with me," Peyton teased as both the girls dabbed their eyes.

Brooke smiled and looked at herself one last time in the mirror, "If I weren't so madly in love with Nathan I might actually take up the offer," she said with a sigh.

"You look beautiful Brooke," Peyton said.

Brooke looked down at herself and then touched her veil lightly, "Thanks," she said softly, "I'm really glad you're here."

"I wouldn't miss this for the world," Peyton said as she rubbed Brooke's arm.

Brooke did the famous 'Brooke smirk' and nudged Peyton, "I saw Eric," she said suggestively, "He's a fox P. Sawyer!"

"Excuse me!" Peyton laughed, "You're getting married!"

Brooke rolled her eyes, "You know what I mean," she said, "Tell me you two have done the deed."

"Some things never change," Peyton said as she looked down at the ground, slightly embarrassed.

Brooke gasped, "You did, didn't you?"

"No!" Peyton exclaimed, "We were making out on my bed and Lucas walked in…Brooke, you do realize we're in a church right?"

Brooke laughed and then put her arm around Peyton, "Eric's hot, and it seems like he likes you…"

"So what you're trying to say is…" Peyton began.

Brooke winked at her, "Go for it," she said as the two of them walked out of the room.

The music began and everyone in the church stood up; Keith walked Brooke down the aisle and everyone was amazed at how beautiful she looked. Brooke was always a beautiful girl, but she was ravishing. Brooke and Nathan made eye contact the whole time she was walking down the aisle. They smiled at each other and Brooke's eyes became damp, as did Nathan's. Brooke had never remembered seeing Nathan so happy before. Keith lifted Brooke's veil and gave her a kiss on the cheek; Brooke silently thanked him and stood beside Nathan.

Their personal vows were said; and there wasn't a dry eye in the church. During the vows Peyton looked onto the church and made eye contact with Eric; he smiled at her and Peyton smiled back. Peyton then looked at Lucas who was looking at her; she smiled weakly at him. He sighed softly and looked at Brooke and Nathan who were now facing each other.

"Do you Nathan Scott take Brooke Davis to be your lawfully wedded wife through sickness and in health, till death do you part?" The priest asked.

Nathan smiled at Brooke, "I do."

"And do you Brooke Davis take Nathan Scott to be your lawfully wedded husband through sickness and in health, till death do you part?" The priest asked.

Brooke smiled and winked at Nathan, "I do."

"I now pronounce you husband and wife," he said and then looked at Nathan, "You may now kiss the bride."

Nathan looked at Brooke and kissed her passionately on the lips as they wrapped their arms around each other. The music started up again and the church cheered as Nathan and Brooke made their way down the aisle together.

Brooke threw her bouquet and then got into the limo with Nathan; Peyton caught the bouquet and laughed along with the bridesmaid. She looked at Eric and kissed him. Lucas watched in agony as he watched the one woman that he had ever truly loved kiss another man.

**xxx**

Nathan and Brooke walked into the reception greeted by applause and cheers; they both smiled as they walked over to their reserved table. They kissed and hugged as their pictures were taken by loving relatives and old friends. Peyton walked over and hugged both of them, "Congratulations!" She said excitedly.

"Thanks," they both said in unison.

Lucas walked over and gave Brooke a hug, and patted Nathan on the back, "How does it feel to be married?"

"Great," Nathan said; Brooke looked over at him and smiled. Nathan kissed Brooke passionately and Brooke giggled.

Brooke took a sip of her champagne and took Nathan's hand, "I really love this bride stuff!"

"Well congratulations you two," Lucas said with a warm smile; they thanked him again and he looked at Peyton, "You look nice tonight."

Peyton smiled, "Thanks," she said, but Lucas had already walked away.

"Hey," Eric said as he walked over to Peyton.

Peyton smiled, "Hey," she said as the two of them sat down, "Did you enjoy the wedding?"

"Yeah," Eric said, "I think I'm enjoying it a hell of a lot more than you…" He said and then followed Peyton's gaze to Lucas.

Peyton looked Eric in the eye, "Tree Hill's a difficult place to get used to," she offered.

"I can tell," Eric said with a laugh, "I never got to talk to you about that kiss, and I never got to talk to you about what we are."

Peyton put her hand on top of Eric's, "When you kissed me earlier today, I couldn't help but think…This is exactly what I want."

"So are we together?" Eric asked; Peyton kissed him passionately on the lips.

Peyton smiled after the kiss and grabbed his hand, "Let's dance."

Everyone danced for hours, and then they sat down to eat; Lucas stood up and gently hit his fork against his champagne glass. The room got quiet and Lucas cleared his throat, "Now as the best man, I have to make a speech," he began and then looked down at his brother and once girlfriend, "Now, if your from Tree Hill than you know the story of Nathan and I, we used to hate each other, but in the end we found out how to be friends…And brothers," Nathan smiled up at Lucas, "And as for this little girl…Excuse me, this little woman Brooke. She was my first love when I came to Tree Hill," Lucas smiled down at Brooke and she smiled back sadly, "I have watched these two go from hating each other to loving each other, then back to hating each other," he joked as the room laughed, "But through everything they always loved each other again, no matter what. I once heard that happy marriages begin when we marry the one we love, and they blossom when we love the one we married. My Greatest wish for the two of you is that through the years your love for each other will so deepen and grow, that years from now you will look back on this day, your wedding day, as the day you loved each other the least. Congratulations _Mr. and Mrs. Scott_," Lucas said with a chuckle, "May you have many, many happy years together. Cheers."

Everyone clinked glasses and smiled; Brooke got up and hugged Lucas tightly, "That was beautiful," she said and then kissed him on the cheek, "Thank you!"

Nathan got up and hugged Lucas as well, "Thanks," he said.

"No problem little bro," Lucas said and then reached out his hand to Peyton, "May I have this dance?" He asked.

Peyton smiled and nodded, "Of course," she said and the two of them headed out to the dance floor.

"Eric's not a bad guy," Lucas said.

Peyton looked at him in confusion, "So you're saying you like him?"

"If he makes you happy than I like him," Lucas said sincerely.

Peyton smiled, "Well he makes me happy."

"Good," Lucas said as he brought Peyton closer to him, "I was thinking about what you said earlier…About letting us go."

Peyton sighed, "I want us to be friends Luke."

"I know," he began, "And I know that you don't love me anymore, so I'm just going to let it go."

Peyton looked at him with sadness, "For some reason I don't know which one I'm in love with you or the memories…"

"I'm going to go," he said with a simple smile as he let go of Peyton. Lucas nodded at Eric and then walked away.

Eric took Lucas's place and looked at Peyton, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Peyton said as she took her eyes off Lucas, "I'm fine…"

**xxx**

Nathan carried Brooke into their wedding suite; Brooke kissed him passionately as they fell onto the bed. Brook began to take off her dress as Nathan took off his jacket.

Not a word was said as the two of them undressed; the covers were already pulled down; they kissed hungrily as if this was each of their first times. Nathan pulled Brooke into him as she kissed at his neck. Nathan's tongue traced the top of Brooke's lip as she nibbled on his bottom lip.

The sex was amazing, they both agreed. Brooke moaned in pleasure as Nathan whispered her name, "I love you," Nathan breathed into Brooke's ear.

The hairs on Brooke's neck stood up as the shivers ran through her body, "I love you too," she said and then grabbed Nathan's face gently; he looked down at her as the two caught their breath, "You don't even have to say a word. Silence is good enough for me just as long as you're here," she said sincerely.

"I remember the first time that I really looked you in your eyes I was thinking to myself there will never be anybody else," Nathan replied as Brooke's eyes watered, "Baby, you amaze me."

Brooke smiled as Nathan went into her again; they both screamed out in pleasure, neither caring how loud they were.

**xxx**

Lucas walked to Peyton's house and walked up to her room. The thought of her and another guy made him furious, but Lucas knew that he had to accept it.

Lucas knocked on her bedroom door; Peyton opened the door and poked her head out, "Luke," she said in surprise, "Hey, what are you doing?"

"I came to talk to you a little bit," he said, "Is that okay?"

Peyton bit her bottom lip, "Right now isn't really a good time," she said apologetically.

"Who's there?" Eric asked as he got up and opened the door wider; Peyton looked down at the ground and Eric's smile dropped, "Luke…Hey…"

Lucas looked at Eric who was wrapped in Peyton's sheet from the waist down, and then he looked at Peyton who also had a blanket covering her, "I'm sorry," he said and then turned around, "I had no idea…I didn't know…Oh god, fuck, I'm sorry," he said and then walked away.

Peyton looked at Eric and then stumbled as she put her clothes on; she ran outside and stopped Lucas, "Luke," she said, "Look, I'm really sorry you had to see that…"

"It's cool Peyt," he said and then looked down at the ground, "I think it would be better if I just left…"

Peyton sighed, "What did you want to talk about?"

Lucas looked up at the stars and then looked back down at Peyton; he had to let it go, she was right all along. She had moved on and he was acting like the jealous ex. He made a mistake and let her go, and now he was paying for it. Luke dug his hands in his pockets, "It was nothing important," he said as he squinted his eyes and walked towards his car.

"Are you sure?" Peyton asked as he opened the door.

Lucas looked up at her and smiled, "I'm sure," he said and then got into the car.

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	27. You Say It Best

**The Bitter Taste**

**You Say It Best…**

_To continue loving somebody even though there's no chance of that love ever thriving; that's romance._

**xxx**

_It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart  
Without saying a word you can light up the dark_

Nathan looked down at Brooke and kissed her forehead; her eyes fluttered open and she smiled up at him. She leaned up and kissed him passionately as the new, white sheets hung across her chest. Nathan put his hand on Brooke's stomach as they hungrily kissed each other. It had been a week since the wedding and they had been staying in the resort that they had rented out.

The two newlyweds spent most of their time on the beach and in the bedroom. Today was the day that they were heading back home; so they made the most of their last night. Brooke giggled in delight as Nathan gripped her hips.

"Can you believe we've been married a week?" Brooke asked her voice light and happy.

Nathan smiled and rolled onto his back, "It's amazing," he said with a genuine smile, "It's almost surreal in a way…"

"I know," Brooke agreed, "I mean, the guy at the front desk called me Mrs. Scott," she gushed, "I've never been a **Mrs.** before!"

Nathan laughed as Brooke nestled herself into his arms, "The wedding was amazing," he complimented. Brooke was the planner for everything, and also the decorator.

"And the sex is **great**," Brooke said with a wiggle of her eyebrows.

Nathan licked his lips, "The sex **is** great," he said with a laugh, "And I just can't believe that I'm going to get sex whenever I want now!" He teased.

"Do you think I'm just going to be one of those wives that's going to cook for you all the time, and then make you a martini when you get home from work?" Brooke joked, "And then after work give you a nice massage and then fuck you?"

Nathan smirked, "Change the martini to a beer and you got yourself a deal…Oh yeah, and don't cook."

"Thanks," Brooke snorted as she playfully slapped her husband.

_Try as I may I could never explain  
What I hear when you don't say a thing_

**xxx**

_The smile on your face lets me know that you need me  
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me_

Peyton looked through pictures from high school; she didn't know why she was looking at them because high school seemed like decades ago. But she had stumbled upon them, and here she was: reliving everything.

She found the picture that she was dreading; the picture of her and Lucas on the night of their Senior Prom. Peyton could remember the evening like it was yesterday. She could remember the cologne Lucas had on and exactly the way he pulled her into him.

The night was beyond perfection, Peyton felt like a princess, and that's something that she hadn't felt like for a long time. She remembered the way Lucas would whisper in her ear during slow songs, and the way he would rest his hand on her lower back. He protected her from anyone and anything.

_The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall  
You say it best when you say nothing at all_

Peyton put down the picture and began to bite her nail; it was a habit that she thought she'd gotten over, but she must've been wrong.

Then Peyton remembered Eric, he had been so nice to her while they were in New York, and she had told them that they were together. They had sex after the wedding and it was…Different. It was weird for Peyton to be touched like that by someone who was Lucas…Or Jake. She had to admit, Eric was an excellent kisser, but they weren't used to each other. Peyton knew that everything took time, but she didn't want to take the time, and she knew that sounded selfish but it was the truth.

_All day long I can hear people talking out loud  
But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd_

Eric walked in with his hands in his pockets; he and Peyton looked at each other. Not a word was said between the two of them, it was silence. Peyton looked once more at the picture that laid on her bed, almost mocking her. Eric sat down beside Peyton as she put her head down and cried. He looked at the picture and he understood what Peyton wanted...And even more what she needed.

Maybe Peyton was looking through the pictures to find some sort of comfort. Maybe she was looking through the pictures because she missed Lucas. Maybe she looked through the pictures because she was wished she was young again. Or maybe, just maybe, she was looking at the pictures because she was pregnant with Eric's child…

**xxx**

_Old Mr. Webster could never define  
What's being said between your heart and mine_

Nathan carried Brooke into their house; they both laughed and kissed. They went up to their bedroom and Nathan plopped Brooke down on the bed.

Brooke seductively looked up at him and crossed her legs, "After having sex that whole week I'm thinking that you're exhausted…" She challenged him.

Nathan crossed his arms, "You don't think I can keep up?"

"No," Brooke said and then got on her knees and inched closer towards him, "I don't," she whispered in his ear and then sexually licked his earlobe.

Chills went all over Nathan's body, "Well Mrs. Scott," he said with a smile as he took off his shirt, "I'm about to prove you wrong."

_The smile on your face lets me know that you need me  
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me_

"Right," Brooke teased as she pulled her shirt over her head, "Come on _hubby_," she kidded.

Nathan took off his shorts, leaving him only in his boxers, "You know," he said, "I never did get a bachelor party, and you never got a bachelorette party…"

"What are you trying to get at Scott?" Brooke asked as she raised her brow.

Nathan rubbed his hands together and gave his famous 'Scott smirk', "Well," he began, "Doesn't a groom usually get a…Oh I don't know…A lap dance?"

"Are you trying to suggest something?" Brooke asked, but she knew where the night was going.

Nathan smiled and kissed Brooke's neck, "Come on baby," he moaned and then motioned to the leather chair sitting in the corner, "We haven't used that the whole time we've been here."

_The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall  
You say it best when you say nothing at all_

"Okay," Brooke said as Nathan excitedly ran over to the chair. Brooke turned on the radio as a slow, sexy song came on. She reached for her bra and then stopped, "I dance for you, you dance for me," she said; Nathan's smile dropped, "Rules are rules…"

Nathan laughed nervously, "Brooke I cannot dance," he said.

"Please," Brooke pouted, "For me?"

Nathan smiled, he couldn't resist her charm, or her for that matter, "Fine," he gave in.

"Good boy," Brooke said as she danced provocatively on Nathan's lap, "After this you might not be able to walk Nate…"

Nathan swallowed and kissed Brooke softly on the lips, "I wouldn't doubt it."

**xxx**

Brooke ran into Peyton's room; she set her purse down and sat down quickly on Peyton's bed. Peyton just looked at her as she caught her breath, "You okay?" Peyton asked with a sarcastic smirk.

"You told me that you had to tell me something important," Brooke began, "So I got my ass out of bed and ran straight over!"

Peyton looked at her watch, "Brooke, it's 4:00 in the afternoon…Why are you still in bed?"

"Peyton," Brooke said with a 'duh' tone, "Nathan and I have been having a honeymoon week," she said with a wink.

Peyton laughed, "Oh," she said and then watched as Brooke looked at the ripped picture of her and Luke.

"So I'm guessing this has to do with Lucas," Brooke said as she held up a piece of the picture.

Peyton nodded slightly and then looked around the room, "I've been able to tell you a lot of things Brooke, and I'm glad that I have someone like you in my life."

"Thanks," Brooke said with a sincere smile, "What's wrong P. Sawyer?"

Peyton was on the verge of tears, she took a deep breath and looked her best friend in the eye, "I'm pregnant," she began.

"You're," Brooke began as her jaw dropped, "Who? Who's…Who's the father?" She stammered.

Peyton sighed, "Eric," she said, "And I really care about him Brooke…I do, but…It's just not there for me anymore."

"Do you want to be with Lucas?" Brooke asked.

Peyton shook her head and then shrugged, "I don't even know anymore…I just wanted to be single, and I think I rushed into this Eric thing way too quickly."

"So," Brooke said and then cleared her throat, "Are you going to keep the baby?"

Peyton nodded, "I was thinking that maybe I could just give the baby up for adoption, because I'm not ready for a kid right now…"

"Does Eric know?" Brooke asked.

Peyton groaned, "Yes…"

"What does he think about this whole baby thing?" Brooke questioned as Peyton laid her head on Brooke's lap.

Peyton bit her bottom lip, "He couldn't be happier," she said apprehensively, "He wants to get married…" Brooke looked down at Peyton in disbelief as Peyton wiped a tear away.

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	28. When You Say Nothing

**The Bitter Taste**

**When You Say Nothing**

_Love is when you miss him even before_

_he leaves, when you could listen to him talk_

_all night and never get tired of hearing his voice when the_

_sound of his name sends chills down your spine and_

_you see his smile the second you close your eyes._

**xxx**

"Hey," Eric said as he walked into Peyton's room. Tissues were sprawled onto the floor and Peyton's music was set at a low, dark tone.

Peyton wiped her nose and looked up at Eric," Hey," she said softly. She had been in bed since Brooke had stopped by to visit.

"I know that everything is really screwed up right now," he began, "But I just want you to know that I love you…"

Peyton sighed as her bottom lip quivered, "Eric," she said sternly, "I really, really don't want this…"

"What?" Eric asked as he sat on the edge of Peyton's bed, "I thought we were together?"

Peyton shook her head slightly, "Eric, you are a great, great guy. You might be even too great for me, but the thing is," she stopped and regained her composure, "I don't think I love you as much as you love me."

Eric's jaw dropped; he got up from the bed and started to pace, "So what do you want me to do? Just leave you here and let you have the pregnancy all by yourself?" He questioned, "I don't want this baby to grow up without a father!"

"I don't want this baby!" Peyton exclaimed, "I want to give it up for adoption," she said softly, "I am not ready for this…"

Eric slammed his fist down on Peyton's desk; Peyton jumped out of the bed and leaned against the wall, "Was I ever going to have a say in this?"

"**I'm** the one that's going to have the baby," Peyton pointed out, "I know this might be selfish and inconsiderate, but **we're** not ready for a baby!"

Eric stopped pacing and looked at her in disbelief, "Oh so now I get it…I was just a rebound guy?"

"It's not fucking like that and you know that!" Peyton said angrily, "You know what? You should just leave!"

Eric stormed over to Peyton and grabbed her wrist; hard, "Don't think that you can just order me around," he growled, "I'm not Lucas!"

"Exactly," Peyton screamed and then shoved him away.

They both heard a cough from the doorway and saw Lucas standing there; he glared at Eric and grabbed him by the throat, "What the hell are you doing?" Lucas asked angrily as he slammed Eric up against a wall.

"Nothing," Eric choked out and then pushed Lucas away, "I'm out," he said and then glared at Peyton, "**I. Am. Out!**" He said once more and then left the room.

Peyton flinched as the front door slammed and she finally felt at ease when she heard Eric's wheels squeal out of the driveway. She sat down on her bed and bit her bottom lip, "Good timing," she said sarcastically.

"So what's up?" Lucas asked looking unpleased.

Peyton shrugged and wiped her eyes, "Nothing really, I've been sketching a lot lately…What about you?"

"That's not what I meant Peyton," Lucas said, "What's up with you and Eric?"

Peyton sighed, "Oh…That," she said and then shrugged, "We're just going through some troubles…And I don't think I'm ever going to see him again," she said and then muttered, "And that's not really a bad thing…"

"If you want to talk about anything Peyton," Lucas began, "You know…I'm always here for you."

Peyton nodded, "I know," she said and then teared up, "I'm, uh, pregnant Luke…"

**xxx**

Brooke walked into her house and walked into the kitchen; she looked around the living room and made a note to herself to call a maid. She smiled to herself as she picked up a pair of Nathan's boxers that were hung over the couch. Blankets, pillows, flowers, and lingerie were everywhere; she picked up the empty wine glasses and put them in the dishwasher.

Her wedding ring sparkled as the sun hit it; Brooke couldn't help but tearfully smile down at her left hand. She was never the commitment type girl while she was in high school, and if anybody would've asked her if she thought she'd get married, Brooke would've said no. Brooke got a soft blanket and laid down on the couch; the last couple of weeks had been fun, but very exhausting.

Nathan walked into the house and saw Brooke sleeping peacefully on the couch; he smiled to himself and sat on the couch so that Brooke's head was resting on his lap. He gently pushed a piece of auburn hair out of his wife's eyes. All Nathan wanted to do was kiss those red lips of hers, but he held back knowing that each of them had had an eventful week.

He looked around the living room and noticed Brooke had cleaned up a bit; he had to chuckle to himself as he recalled the endless nights they had shared after the wedding. Being with Brooke was different than being with Haley; with Haley it was just about that one night of passion they had shared, Haley's first time…And then it was done. With Brooke…It was something so much more than just sharing the experience together. Sure, they had sex before their wedding, but the night of their wedding was such an experience, especially for Nathan.

The connection they shared was more powerful than any connection that Nathan had ever had with any girlfriend. It wasn't just about the sex; it never was about the sex. It was always something more between the two of them.

"Nathan," Brooke sighed in her sleep.

Nathan kissed Brooke softly on the lips and smiled, "I'm right here baby…"

**xxx**

Lucas looked at Peyton in shock and disbelief, "What?"

"I'm pregnant Luke," Peyton said again.

Lucas put his hands on his head and started to pace the room, "How…How? Oh my fucking god," he sighed, "How did this happen?"

"I don't know Lucas," she began, "I mean, we used a condom we did everything…I don't know what to tell you…"

Lucas sat down beside Peyton and grabbed her hand, "I'm here for you okay?" Peyton nodded slightly, "Just…Let me help you through this."

Peyton went to say something but her phone rang; she rolled her eyes but picked up the phone, "Hello," she said, "Oh my god," Peyton gasped, "Yeah…Okay, I'll be there soon," she said and then hung up. Peyton quickly got her coat on went to go out the door.

"Where are you going?" Lucas asked as he followed her.

Peyton turned towards him and wiped her eyes, "Eric totaled his car…"

**xxx**

Peyton and Lucas both ran into the hospital; Peyton ran up the desk, "An Eric Washington was put in here at least half an hour ago…"

The nurse looked and Peyton and Lucas and sighed, "He's not in very good shape, but one of you can go in and see him…"

Lucas nodded to Peyton and she gave him a quick hug, "I'll be right out," she said and then walked into the room that the nurse had told her to go into.

Peyton stood beside the hospital bed and looked down at Eric' bruised face, "Hey," she said softly as she gently stroked his cheek, "Look…I know that everything that's gone on between us has been pretty fucked up, but I want you to know that I care about you…I just…I don't love you."

Eric opened his eyes slightly and looked up at Peyton, "I'm sorry," he said softly.

"Shh," Peyton said with a comforting smile, "It's okay…I forgive you…"

Eric closed his eyes, "I know you love him," he said and then coughed, "I know you love Lucas…"

"I'm sorry for everything Eric," Peyton tearfully began, "I never meant to hurt you or anything."

Eric opened his eyes and smiled slightly, "I'm lucky I met you Peyton," he said truthfully, "Goodbye…"

"What?" Peyton said frantically, "What do you mean goodbye?"

Eric's eyes watered and he looked over to his heart monitor, "I'm dying Peyton," he said and then closed his eyes.

His heart monitor beeped and tears came down Peyton's face, "Eric," she said, "Eric," she said louder, "Nurse! Nurse!"

The nurse came running in and checked Eric's pulse; the doctor came in and also checked Eric's pulse. He looked at the nurse and shook his head, "I'm sorry," he said to Peyton, "He's dead."

Peyton walked out of the room; everything around her seemed to be going in slow motion. Lucas looked at her and he knew…He knew that Eric was gone. Peyton fell into Lucas's arms and cried. Lucas kissed the top of Peyton's forehead and rocked her in his arms.

**xxx**

Brooke and Peyton sat on the beach together; the only noise was the crashing of the waves. Brooke didn't know what to say to her best friend; the father of Peyton's baby was dead.

"I can't believe he's gone," Peyton said as she looked down at the sand, "I mean, I was just talking to him a couple of hours ago…And now…Now he's gone."

Brooke put her arm around Peyton, "I'm so sorry P. Sawyer," she said sincerely.

"It seems like nothing has been going good for me lately," Peyton said as she wiped her nose.

Brooke frowned and pulled her best friend closer to her, "I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better."

"You've done so much for me Brooke," Peyton said thankfully and then kissed her best friend's forehead, "Thank you…"

Brooke smiled, "That's what I'm here for…"

"It's almost two in the morning," Peyton said as she looked at her watch, "You can go up to bed, I need some time to think…"

Brooke looked at her, "Are you sure?" She asked.

"Yeah," Peyton said with a reassuring, but fake smile, "I'm sure…"

Brooke gave Peyton one last hug and got up, "Call me if you need anything," she said.

"Will do," Peyton said and then watched as Brooke left. She sighed and laid on her back looking up at the sky.

Lucas sat down beside Peyton and let out a deep breath, "Hey," he said.

"Thanks for everything," Peyton began, "You've done so much for me, and I didn't deserve any of it."

"Yes you did" Lucas said sincerely and then cleared his Peyton, "Look Peyton," he began, but was cut off by a figure walking towards them down the beach.

Peyton's eyes got wide, "Jake," she said in almost a whisper. As Jake got closer Peyton shot up and jumped into his arms, "Jake," she said once more.

Lucas got up and dusted himself off; he looked at Peyton once more and then walked away. Jake looked at Peyton and they kissed passionately; he smiled and so did she, "I heard about everything…"

"Did Brooke call you?" Peyton asked and Jake smiled and nodded, "I'm glad she did…"

Jake kissed Peyton's cheek and sighed, "I am too…"

**Read and Review.**


	29. Play Me Anything

**The Bitter Taste**

**Play Me Anything**

_When you're around someone so much_

_for so long, they become a part of you and_

_if they change or go away, you won't know_

_who you are without them_

**xxx**

"Everything's just so hard," Peyton whispered as she and Jake sprawled out on her bed looking up at the ceiling, "Lucas and I are completely done, Eric is dead, and I'm pregnant…"

Jake ran his fingers through Peyton's curls, "I'm here now Peyton," he said in a soft voice; he kissed the top of her head and squeezed her closer to him, "I'm here…"

"How's everything with Jenny and Nikki?" Peyton asked apprehensively.

Jake sighed and rubbed his temple, "Nikki's out of the picture, and I have full custody of Jenny," he said with a big smile.

"Oh my god!" Peyton said and then hugged Jake, "That's so great."

Jake nodded, "I know… I left Jenny with my parents because I figured you and I needed time to talk."

"I missed you so much," Peyton said as she collapsed onto Jake's lap, "You have no idea how many nights I stayed up and wondered where you were, or how you were doing."

Jake rubbed her back, "I think I do," he began, "There wasn't a single a night where I didn't think about you."

"Are you staying for good?" Peyton finally asked.

Jake looked down at the sheets and looked away from Peyton, "I don't know if I can or not…"

"Why?"

Jake sighed, "I haven't been here for awhile Peyton," he said, "I came back and everything's so different now… Brooke and Nathan are married, you're pregnant… I've missed so much."

"I need you here," Peyton said as she tried to hold back the tears, "I need you, don't you get it?"

Jake rested his palm on Peyton's red, wet cheek, "I don't want to hurt you again, and I can't promise you that."

"I don't care," Peyton cried, "If it's because of the baby…"

Jake shook his head and put his finger to her lips, "Even if you weren't pregnant I probably wouldn't want to stay," he said truthfully, "It's so hard Peyton. It's hard for me to watch you cry, and watch you be hurt. I just think… For right now, we should be friends."

"We're not friends," Peyton said tearfully, "Friends don't look at each other like we do."

Jake felt his eyes begin to water, "I love you Peyton," he said in almost a whisper as he held her face close to his, "Don't ever forget that."

Peyton grabbed onto Jake's hand and kissed his hand, "I love you too…"

"Get some sleep," he said as he pulled the covers over Peyton's slim body; she looked at him in worry, "I'll be here when you wake up," he said reassuringly.

**xxx**

Nathan and Brooke sat in the living room as they watched TV. The night had been emotionally draining for the both of them. Brooke snuggled closer to Nathan and closed her eyes. Nathan draped a blanket over his sleeping wife and continued watching TV. The rain started coming down hard after a few hours of watching Sports Center. He heard the door knock and he groaned in frustration. Nathan opened the door and saw Haley standing there drenched with rain.

"Haley?" Nathan asked; it had been a couple months since he had last seen her here with Chris.

Haley smiled sadly and looked up at him, "Hey…" Her voice was weak and tired.

"What are you doing here?" Nathan finally asked.

Haley sighed, "I couldn't do it anymore… Chris wasn't the guy I thought he was, and music just wasn't fun anymore."

"Come inside," Nathan said and then shut the door once Haley had walked in, "Do you want anything to drink?" He asked as the two of them made their way into the living room.

Haley shook her head, "No I'm fine," she said and then looked on the couch to see Brooke sleeping, "Figures she'd be sleeping," she said with a small laugh.

Nathan smirked, "It's been a tiring day," he said and then sat down in the kitchen.

"Is everything okay?" Haley asked.

Nathan shrugged, "Peyton's pregnant and the father of the baby died last night…"

"Oh god," Haley said as she put her hand over her mouth, "Is Peyton okay?"

Nathan rubbed his eyes, "Jake's back… So… I don't know how that whole thing is going to go."

"I feel horrible," Haley said with an open mouth.

Nathan nodded and drummed his fingers on the table, "What happened with you and Chris?"

"I don't know," Haley said as she stood up and ran her fingers through her wet hair, "At first everything was so perfect between us… And then we stopped having fun, we stopped loving each other."

Nathan folded his arms, "I'm sorry…"

"It's okay," Haley said with a small shrug, "It's just what you get when you mess with a rock star," she said sarcastically.

Nathan chuckled, "Apparently…"

"How was the wedding?" Haley asked as she looked at the pictures, "Brooke looks amazing!"

Nathan smiled, "Yeah," he said, "The wedding was great, and it was just a great moment."

"That's good," Haley said with a content smile, and then put her hand on Nathan's arm, "I'm really happy for you and Brooke…"

Nathan smiled as he and Haley hugged, "I'm glad you're back Hales…" Brooke watched from the living room as the two hugged; a pang of jealousy hit her like a ton of bricks. Brooke knew that Haley would eventually come running back to Nathan once things with Chris went sour, and she knew that Haley wasn't going to give up.

Brooke laid on the couch and listened to Nathan and Haley talk about music, basketball, the wedding, and high school memories. She clenched her teeth when Haley brought up their relationship, but smiled once Nathan had brushed it off.

"Do you have somewhere to stay?" Nathan finally asked after an hour or so of talking.

Haley smiled, "I'm going to go to Lucas's and see if I can stay there for a little bit, and then I'm thinking about buying an apartment."

"Okay," Nathan said as the two of them stood up, "Well give me a call if you need anything, and I'm sure Brooke will help you with anything you need."

Haley smiled as she opened the front door, "Thanks for everything," she said and gave him one last hug.

"No problem," Nathan said and then closed the door once she left. He walked back into the living room and saw Brooke sitting on the couch with a sour puss look on her face. He sighed and jumped on the couch beside her; she didn't even look at him. He put his arm around her, and she scooted over, "How long have you been awake?" Nathan asked.

"Long enough to hear you and Haley talk about you're whole life stories," Brooke said bitterly and then cleared her throat in annoyance.

Nathan rolled his eyes and chuckled, "You're not jealous are you?" He teased as he put his two fingers under her chin.

"No," Brooke said as she slapped his hand away, "I'm not in the mood right now Nathan."

Nathan groaned, "Brooke Penelope Davis! Whatever I did to make you mad I'm sorry, but Haley and I were just talking. We're friends."

"You two will never just be friends," Brooke said with a cynical laugh. Nathan got on top of Brooke and started tickling her, "Nathan stop!" Brooke said with a big laugh, "Stop!" She said and continued to laugh, "Nate!"

Nathan laughed, "Still mad?"

"Yes," Brooke said and so Nathan started to tickle her again, "Stop! I'm going to piss my pants!"

Nathan smirked, "Are you still mad?"

Brooke looked up into his deep, blue eyes and shook her head, "No," she said softly and then stroked his cheek.

"Good," Nathan said and then passionately kissed his wife, "I love you…"

Brooke smiled, "I love you too…"

**xxx**

Haley smoked a cigarette as she sat on a bench near the River court. She exhaled and looked out onto the river. She couldn't believe that she had actually left this place.

"The rock star's back," she heard Lucas's voice say behind her.

Haley turned around and smiled, "Hey buddy…"

Lucas looked at the cigarette and frowned, "I see you've taken up smoking now?"

"I am a rock star," Haley said as she took another drag of her cigarette, "It's not that bad Luke…"

Lucas laughed and shook his head, "When did you get back?" He asked as he sat down beside his old best friend.

"A couple hours ago," Haley said, "Chris and I weren't working out, and music wasn't fun anymore."

Lucas looked at her questioningly, "And this has nothing to do with Nathan right?"

"No," Haley said as she lit another cigarette, "Does it always have to be about him?"

Lucas chuckled, "With you? Yes."

"Well he's not the reason I'm back," she said as she exhaled smoke, "He and Brooke are married, and I wouldn't ruin that ever."

Lucas smiled and put his arm around her, "So are you staying with me?"

"You read my mind," Haley said as the two of them linked arms and started walking towards Luke's car.

Lucas stopped and turned towards Haley, "If my mom finds out you're a smoker she's going to flip. So can you save the bad girl rock stuff for when you're not near here?"

Haley smiled and threw her cigarette down, "It'll be our little secret," she said and then continued walking.

"You've changed," Lucas said.

Haley turned around and smirked, "You have no idea," she said and then began to walk.

**Sorry it's so late!**

**Read and Review!**


	30. The Past Isn’t Forgotten

**The Bitter Taste**

**The Past Isn't Forgotten**

_So here's a piece of advice...let go when you're hurting too much, give up when love isn't enough, and move on when things aren't like before, for surely that __is__ someone out there who will love you even more._

**xxx**

Haley threw the last pillow onto Lucas's bed and then collapsed onto it, "Thanks for letting me have the bed," she said as she twirled her blonde hair.

"I really didn't have a choice," Lucas laughed, "As soon as we walked into the house you jumped on it and fell asleep."

Haley stuck her tongue out, "You see what it's like after a good year or so of sleeping in hotel rooms and on tour buses!"

"I have to say I'm pretty surprised at the whole Chris thing," Lucas began, "Last I heard the two of you were engaged…"

Haley sat up and shrugged, "Didn't work out…Shit happens."

"So was it worth it?" Lucas asked.

"Was what worth it?" Haley said.

Lucas leaned against his drawer and put his hands in his pockets, "Leaving town, leaving Nathan, and then coming back and then leaving again?"

"You still think I came back for Nathan don't you?" Haley said with a roll of her eyes.

Lucas shrugged, "You tell me Hales."

"I told you Luke," Haley started, "I'm back because music wasn't fun anymore and because Chris and I weren't working out. I know that Brooke and Nathan are married, and I know that Nathan and I are finished. The divorce papers were signed, it's over."

Lucas studied her, "I believe you," he said as Haley walked towards him, "It's just…Really good to have you back," Luke said as the two best friends hugged, "I don't want you to leave."

**xxx**

Peyton walked into Nathan and Brooke's house and saw Nathan sitting on the couch. He got up and gave her a hug, "Hey Nate," Peyton said with a smile and then rested her hand on her belly, "Is Brooke around?"

"No," Nathan said as he looked around the house, "I think she went grocery shopping actually."

Peyton laughed, "Well that's something I'd love to see."

"Believe me, she's the pickiest shopper ever," Nathan said with a small laugh, he looked at Peyton's showing belly and smiled, "How are things going with…"

"The baby?" Peyton asked, "It's weird being pregnant…I'm always craving weird foods, and I'm always hungry."

Nathan laughed, "How are things going with Jake?"

Peyton sat down on the couch and sighed, "It's definitely not what I imagined…"

"I'm sorry Peyton," Nathan said sincerely.

Peyton shrugged and looked down at her stomach, "I just imagined that he would come back and we'd be together, and we'd get married and have a future…And now he tells me that things are too difficult and that we should just be friends…"

"I know I'm a guy and I don't pick up on these things to well," Nathan began, "But…Did you ever think that Jake's not the one?"

Peyton looked at him, "What are you trying to get at Nate?"

"There's a guy that's been there for you ever since day one and he loves the hell out of you," Nathan pointed out.

Peyton looked down and felt her eyes begin to tear up, "Lucas…" She said softly.

"I'm not saying that Jake isn't a good guy," he said, "I'm just saying that Lucas is in love with you, and you need to realize that."

Peyton nodded and smiled sadly, "Thanks Nate," she said; her voice soft and sad. Nathan smiled and gave her a hug; Peyton got up and walked out of the house. She got in her car and started driving towards Lucas's.

**xxx**

"Look at you!" Haley squealed as her and Lucas looked through old photo albums of themselves from when they were kids.

Lucas slapped her thigh playfully, "Look at you!" He said as he pointed out a picture of Haley with badly crimped hair and a big retainer, "You look like a dork!"

"Shut up!" Haley said as she pushed Lucas, "If I wouldn't have had that retainer I wouldn't have these beautiful pearly whites!"

Lucas rolled his eyes playfully and then flipped to a picture of Haley and him on the night of their Jr. High dance, "Awe looked at us," he said sarcastically.

Haley smacked him playfully, "Shut up we were cute," she said with a smile, "God," she said and then looked at the picture more carefully, "I remember that night…"

"Me too," Lucas said as he looked at Haley.

Haley looked up at him and they stared at each other for a moment, "You know," she said as she cleared her throat, "That was probably one of the best first kiss's a girl could have."

"What can I say?" Lucas said with a laugh, "You weren't too bad yourself," he said with a smirk.

Haley giggled and put a strand of hair behind her ear; Lucas messed her hair up and laughed. Haley tackled him onto the bed and pinned him down, "Ha!" She said as she sat on top of him.

"I'm not afraid to hit a girl," Lucas said jokingly.

Haley rolled her eyes and smiled, "It's because you hit like a girl," she retorted and then laughed.

Lucas laughed and brought Haley closer towards him. The laughter stopped and the two of them looked at each other. Lucas turned his head and kissed Haley softly on the lips. The kiss broke and the two looked at each other for another moment. Lucas rested his hands on Haley's hips and got on top over her; he kissed her softly at first and then slowly his tongue laced the bottom of her lip. Haley smiled and opened her mouth, and ran her fingers through Lucas's hair. They breathed heavily when the kissing stopped. Haley looked at Lucas and smiled; he took off his shirt and began kissing Haley again.

Peyton stood at Lucas's door and looked in on what was happening. It was like watching a car crash; she wanted to look away, but she couldn't. She put her hand over her mouth and let out a soft cry as she walked out of the house. She looked back at Lucas's house and then got into her car and cried.

**xxx**

"_I've been walking around all day, thinking I think I have a problem, I think I think too much_," Brooke sang as she strummed her acoustic guitar.

"New song?" Nathan asked as he walked into their bedroom where Brooke was playing.

Brooke smiled and shrugged, "Just something I've been working on…"

"You know," Nathan said as he sat down beside her and kissed her softly on the cheek, "I'd really like to hear it."

Brooke blushed and turned away, "Nathan," she said with a small laugh, "I haven't' played anything for anybody in forever."

"Please?" Nathan said as he ran his fingers through her brown hair, "For me?"

Brooke smiled and started to strum her guitar again, "Fine…For you."

_I've been walking around all day, thinking  
I think I have a problem, I think I think too much  
I've been taught to hold back my tears and avoid them  
But you've made pain into something I could touch_

Peyton walked into her room and sat down on her bed; she looked around her walls at all her drawings and laid on her back. She looked beside her and saw a note folded. Peyton opened the note and read it, she wiped her eyes and got up.

_I've been walking around all day, laughing  
Think I'd be better off without you here  
And I bet you are sweet and hard to get over  
So I'll cry and people will stop and stare  
Now that's ok, let them stop and stare..._

Haley rolled on top of Lucas and kissed him hard; he looked into her eyes and she bit her bottom lip, "Are we supposed to be doing this?" Haley asked.

"I don't know," Lucas said softly, "But for the first time in my life, I think I'm doing something right for a change."

Haley smiled as she grabbed Lucas's hand and kissed it, "Me too…"

_Cause I am fragile  
I am hopeless  
I'm not perfect  
But I am free..._

**Read and Review, please.**


	31. Don't Bother

**The Bitter Taste**

**Don't Bother**

_So here's a piece pf advice...let go when you're hurting too much, give up when love isn't enough, and move on when things aren't like before, for surely that __is__ someone out there who will love you even more._

Peyton walked along the beach and looked out into the waves. Calm and peaceful; everything her life wasn't. She looked once more at the note that had been left on her bed. It was from Jake, telling that he loved her, but he had to leave. Things were too difficult and everything had changed between then, is what it read. Peyton threw the note into the water and kept walking. She looked up to Brooke and Nathan's house and saw Brooke coming towards her.

Brooke smiled at her best friend, and linked arms with her, "Hey cutie," she said as the two of them sat down in the sand.

"Hey," Peyton said.

Brooke let out a sigh, "What's wrong sweetie?"

Peyton looked up at the sky and closed her eyes, "I saw Haley and Lucas sleeping together yesterday…"

"You're kidding me?" Brooke asked.

Peyton shook her head and let out a dry laugh, "And to top **that** all off Jake left."

Brooke put her arm around Peyton, "I'm sorry," she said softly.

Peyton shrugged and put a hand on her stomach, "I think that right now I just have to focus on the baby."

"I'm here for you P. Sawyer," Brooke said with a smile, "And I love the new hair," she said as she ran her fingers through Peyton's short, straight hair.

Peyton smiled, "Thanks B. Scott," she said and then gave Brooke a hug.

**xxx**

Haley hopped into bed and fed Lucas a piece of toast. Lucas smiled and kissed her quickly on the lips. "You know," Haley said with her mouth full of toast, "People are going to be very SURPRISED about this whole thing…I mean, we're going to get some shit for this," she laughed.

"Then let's not tell anyone," Lucas said as he brought Haley closer to him.

Haley raised a brow, "Kinky," she said and then lit a cigarette. Lucas laughed and kissed the top of her head. The doorbell rang and Lucas and Haley looked at each other, "I'll get it," Haley sang as she ran to the door. She opened it and saw Nathan standing there with his gym shorts on and a basketball under his arm.

"Hey," Nathan said with a nod.

Haley took a drag from her cigarette, "Hey you," she said, "What's up?"

Nathan shrugged, "Nothing much, I just stopped by to see if Luke wanted to go down to the River court to shoot around a bit."

Haley looked back into the house and heard the shower running, "I think he just got into the shower," she said, "But you can wait for him here."

Nathan nodded as the two of them made their way over to the porch swing to sit down, "You glad to be back?" He asked.

"Yeah," Haley said with a big smile and then took another drag, "Look, I'm sorry about showing up at your house that one night kind of unexpectedly. I don't want to start anything between you and Brooke."

Nathan looked at her, "It's fine, and Brooke was fine too."

"Good," Haley began, "Because I'm done with the bitchy, ex-wife that comes back to town to start trouble," Haley teased as she threw her cig down.

"I think we've all grown up and gotten over all the high school bull shit," Nathan stated.

Haley smiled, "Good riddance to that…"

**xxx**

Nathan walked into his house, and saw Brooke at the kitchen table. He went up behind her and began to rub her back, "What are you doing beautiful?"

Brooke shrugged him off, "Paying bills," she said bitterly.

"What's wrong?" Nate asked as he sat down next to her.

Brooke threw her pen down and glared at Nathan, "We haven't had sex for a week, maybe two!"

Nathan laughed, "That's why you're mad?"

"How do you find this funny?" Brooke yelled, "Ever since Haley showed up here we've been acting like a 70 year old couple!"

Nathan groaned, "First off, Haley isn't here for me, and I sure as hell am not going to leave you for a high school thing!"

Brooke's eyes began to water, "I'm sorry," she cried as she put her head in her hands, "I just…"

Nathan got down on his knees and put his hands in Brooke's lap, "I love you," he said softly and then kissed Brooke passionately.

He wiped a tear from Brooke's cheek and kissed her again. He picked her up and Brooke wrapped her legs around him. He pushed Brooke up against the wall as she quickly pulled her shirt off. They breathed heavily as Nate grabbed Brooke's left breast. Brooke smiled and sucked on Nathan's neck as he started to carry her up the stairs to the bedroom. Nathan laid Brooke down on the bed; he pulled his shirt over his head and threw it across the room.

Brooke giggled as Nathan got on top of her, "Come here sexy," she said with a gleam in her eyes.

He smiled and began to kiss her; Nathan ran his fingers through Brooke's hair as she started to undo his jeans. Brooke then slid off her skirt and tossed it aside. She moaned as Nathan slid inside of her; her grabbed her ass as she rolled on top of him. They breathed in unison when they had finally stopped; Brooke looked Nathan and smiled, "I love you," she said.

Nathan put his hand on her cheek and smirked, "I love you too, and I always will love you…"

**xxx**

Peyton walked into her room and saw Lucas sitting on her bed. He smiled at her, "Hey Peyton," he began, "I just stopped by to see how you were doing."

"I'm fine," Peyton said as she looked down at the floor.

Lucas cleared his throat and sat up from the bed, "I wanted to talk about everything…From the beach and everything."

"I don't really think that's necessary right now Luke," Peyton said as she walked over to her computer and looked away from him.

Lucas looked at her in confusion, "We've been through a lot Peyton and I just think they we have a lot to talk about with out relationship and everything…"

"What?" Peyton snapped, "Our relationship?" She said cynically, "**We **don't have a fucking relationship Lucas…We were two lonely people who were on a beach together. The father of my baby had just died and I probably wasn't thinking straight so whatever I said didn't mean a damn thing!"

Lucas looked at her, "Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

"I saw you with her Luke!" Peyton screamed as she smacked a cup off her desk.

Lucas's face fell, "Me and Haley?"

"Yeah! You and Haley," Peyton said and then put a hand over her eyes, "Jake left me and I thought I'd come back to talk to you," she sobbed, "And I saw you fucking riding Haley…God Luke!"

Lucas ran his hand along his hair and sighed, "We weren't going to tell anybody about us," he began, "Look Peyton I'm really sorry you had to see that, but Haley and I…We were just talking and everything felt so right."

"If it felt so right then be with her," Peyton said softly, "Because I can't even look at you right now, and I **don't** want you to help me with this baby!"

"Peyton you're not thinking straight," Lucas stated.

Peyton got up and slapped Lucas across the face, "Get out," she said through gritted teeth, "Get out!" Lucas touched his cheek and walked out of the room. Peyton slammed her bedroom door and dropped down to the floor.

Read and Review, please.


	32. Look How They Shine For You

**The Bitter Taste**

**Look How They Shine For You**

_When you're around someone so much_

_for so long, they become a part of you and_

_if they change or go away, you won't know_

_who you are without them_

**xxx**

Brooke walked into Suburban Filth; a store that she had become manager of. She smiled at her workers and looked at the new designs on the table. Somebody cleared their throat beside her, and she saw Haley standing there holding a pair of black laced boy shorts, and a matching bra.

Brooke let out a dry laugh, "For Lucas?" She asked sarcastically.

Haley looked down at the ground, "I guess you talked to Peyton…"

"Well it was mostly Peyton crying, and in between sobs Peyton telling me what she saw," Brooke said as she leaned against a table, "If you're not back trying to ruin my life, you just have to be back ruining somebody else's."

Haley sighed, "I'm not trying to ruin anybody's life…From what I heard her and Lucas weren't involved. Jake was back and Peyton was happy."

"You know how Jake is," Brooke began, "He comes back and then **leaves**. Comes back, and **leaves**. You of all people should know how that works."

"I didn't come here to get lectured Brooke," Haley snapped.

"Then why did you come here?" Brooke asked.

Haley rolled her eyes and held up her underwear, "To buy underwear…"

"Don't be smart," Brooke said as she cocked her hip, "For a big music star it doesn't seem like Tree Hill would be the scene."

Haley bit her bottom lip, "Chris and I are over…I thought Nathan would've told you."

"Nathan doesn't talk about you," Brooke spat quickly.

Haley laughed sarcastically and set down the stuff she was planning on buying, "Lucas and I are going to continue to sleep together, Brooke. I don't care if Peyton or you, for that matter, have a problem with it. As for you and Nathan, I'm happy for you guys. I'm happy that he found someone who really loves him, and I know that he will love you and trust you so much more than he ever loved or trusted me. I'm sorry that Peyton is upset, but I can't help that I love Lucas…" Haley turned and walked out of the store.

**xxx**

Brooke walked into Dan Scott Motors, which Nathan had taken over after his parents had moved. She walked into Nathan's office and saw an attractive red head standing there smiling at him as she gave him papers. Brooke stopped in her tracks and raised her brow as she watched the girl laugh at Nathan's jokes way too hard, and touch his shoulder when she talked to him. She cleared her throat and caused both of them to look up at her. Nathan stood up and walked over to Brooke, "Brooke," he said as he put his arm around her waist, "This is Rachel, she's my new secretary."

"What happened to the other one? Uhm…Mary, Margie, or whatever the hell her name was?" Brooke asked as she studied this "Rachel".

Nathan chuckled, "Terri was 87 years old, sweetheart."

"The older, the better," Brooke said with a fake smile.

Rachel smiled and walked up to Brooke with her hand outstretched, "You must be Nathan's wife, Brooke…I'm Rachel Winters," she said.

Brooke gave her a fake smile and shook her hand, "How old are you?"

"21," Rachel said enthusiastically.

Brooke gave Nathan a look and then turned back towards Rachel, "Well it was very nice meeting you, but I have to go," she said and then walked out of the office.

"Excuse me," Nathan said to Rachel as he ran after Brooke. He grabbed her arm, "Is there a problem?"

Brooke crossed her arms tightly across her chest, "She's gorgeous Nate! And she's 21!"

"Brooke," Nathan said as he laughed and shook his head, "She's my secretary; I don't look at her in any other way."

"So you didn't notice that little mini skirt she was wearing, or the fact that her boobs were almost coming out of that top?" Brooke asked.

Nathan cupped Brooke's face and put his forehead on hers, "No," he said softly, "The only thing I noticed was that hot brunette that walked into my office…"

"Good," Brooke said with a smile. Nathan kissed her softly on the lips; Brooke smirked and kissed him back, "I'll let you go…"

Nathan kissed her on the forehead, "I'll be home at 6," he said and then walked back towards his office.

**xxx**

Peyton walked into Brooke and Nathan's house and saw Brooke sitting on the couch with a glass of Jack Daniel's. Peyton let out a little smile and picked up the bottle that sat beside her. "Nothing a little Jack can't fix," Brooke said as she took a sip from her glass.

"What's wrong?" Peyton asked as she set down the bottle.

Brooke sighed, "Let's just say…Nathan has a new secretary; she's 21 and hot."

"Brooke," Peyton said as she sat down beside her best friend, "Nathan would never cheat on you with some 21 year old hoochie mama."

Brooke shrugged and slunk down in the couch, "You know how Nate is," she began, "If she's beautiful and forward then he's going to go for it…I mean that's how I was."

"He's married now Brooke," Peyton began, "Nathan's changed a lot since when we knew him…"

Brooke looked up at the clock, it read 6:30. "I know," Brooke said and then turned on the TV.

**xxx**

"So you actually fought these guys in just your boxers with your brother?" Rachel laughed.

Nathan laughed as well, "Well my half brother…But to us, we are brothers."

"How does the half come into play?" Rachel asked.

"Well, my dad got Luke's mom pregnant in high school," Nathan began, "And then he met my mom and got her pregnant, and chose my mom over Karen."

"Quite the life," Rachel said as she turned up the radio, "This is my favorite song!" Coldplay's "Yellow" came out from the speakers and Rachel quietly sang along to it; she stood up and looked at Nathan, "May I have this dance?" She teased.

Nathan smiled and began to dance with her, "So did you like Michigan?" He asked to break the silence.

"Not really," Rachel said and then giggled, "Dancing isn't about talking, Nate. Dancing…It's about connecting with the person who you're with," she said in almost a whisper.

Nathan raised his brow, "That's poetic…"

"My dad taught me that before he died," Rachel said and then looked down at the ground.

"I'm sorry," Nathan said sympathetically.

Rachel shrugged, "It's okay…"

Nathan looked up at the clock and it read 6:43; he let go of Rachel and began to put on his jacket, "Shit!"

"Nate," Rachel began as he frantically gathered up papers, "Nate, chill!"

Nathan looked at her, "I promised Brooke I'd be home at 6…"

"You worked late," Rachel began as she sat on the desk, "Come on, we didn't do anything wrong…"

"I was with you, in my office, alone…Dancing," Nathan began, "I'm married."

Rachel sighed, "I still don't see anything wrong with this situation," she said and then grabbed Nathan's tie, "Yet," she whispered and then kissed him passionately on the lips.

Nathan lost his thoughts as Rachel's tongue slid into his mouth. He grabbed her ass as put her up against the door. She ran her fingers through his hair as his tongue traced her bottom lip and then into her mouth. She took her shirt off, and Nathan felt her bare skin against his hands. He stopped kissing her and looked in her eyes; he backed away and put his hands on his head. "This isn't right," Nathan said as he picked up Rachel's shirt and handed it to her.

"That's kind of the whole point of an affair, Nate," Rachel said as she put her shirt on.

Nathan looked at her, "I'm not going to have an affair…"

"You almost did," Rachel said as she licked her lips, "It's just having a little fun," she said with a laugh, "See you tomorrow," she said as she walked out of the office.

**xxx**

Nathan walked into his house and saw Peyton sitting on the couch, and Brooke lying down. He quietly walked over and saw that Brooke was sleeping. He looked at his watch; it read 7:15. Peyton looked up at him and then stood up, "She's been waiting for you," she said.

"I'm sorry," Nathan began, "I had so much damn paperwork," he lied.

Peyton nodded, "Okay…Well…" She said and then walked out of the house.

Nathan sat down on the couch and rested Brooke's head on his lap; he looked down at her and wiped a strand of hair from her eyes. Nathan replayed the events of what had happened earlier in his head; why would he do that to Brooke? Why would he even think of that? She deserved better…

**Read and Review, please.**


	33. We're Trying, We're Dying

**The Bitter Taste**

**We're Trying, We're Dying**

_The trouble with love is that it doesn't care how fast you fall._

**xxx**

Nathan pulled up his pants and buckled his belt. He put his tie on and looked over towards the bed; Rachel laid there smoking a cigarette. He didn't know how it all started. Nathan had gotten up, gave Brooke a kiss goodbye, got to work, saw Rachel, and they ended up renting a motel room for a couple of hours. She smiled up at him and crushed her cigarette, "I have to say Nathan," Rachel began, "That was amazing…" Nathan looked at her and sighed as he tucked in his shirt and then put on his blazer. Rachel let out a dry laugh, "Feeling guilty?"

"How can I not?" Nathan asked, "I've been having an affair…"

Rachel wrapped the sheets around her and stood up; she stood in front of Nathan and re-did his tie for him, "Nathan…She's not going to find out. I won't allow it. Look how well this is working out for the both of us." Nathan looked down at the ground and moved away from Rachel.

**xxx**

Brooke felt shivers go up and down her arms; she rubbed her hands together and took another sip of her tea. "What?" Peyton asked.

The two of them were sitting on the deck drinking tea and eating cookies, "Nothing," Brooke said, "I just got this really bad feeling about something…"

"Yeah, I've been getting a lot of those lately," Peyton muttered.

Brooke gave her a sympathetic look, "Still upset about Haley and Luke?"

"The thing is…I know I made a mistake with trusting Jake again…" Peyton started, "Lucas loved me and I loved him."

Brooke patted Peyton's knee and sighed, "Do you have any names for the baby yet?"

Peyton smiled and rubbed her stomach, "If it's a girl I was thinking maybe naming her Elizabeth or Annie or something…" Peyton said, "And if it's a boy I was going to name him Eric," she said sadly.

"Peyton…" Brooke began, but then the phone rang, "Hold on," she said and then ran into the house. Minutes later Brooke came out; her face was pale and tear stained.

Peyton sat up quickly, "What's wrong?"

"Nathan's in the hospital," Brooke said softly. Peyton grabbed her hand and the two of them ran to Brooke's car.

**xxx**

Lucas rolled over and kissed Haley's forehead. She smiled and opened her eyes slowly, "Hi," she said softly.

"Hi," Lucas said with a smile, "Sleep well?"

Haley yawned and stretched out her arms, "Uh-huh."

"What happened between you and Chris?" Lucas asked as he ran his fingers through Haley's blonde hair.

She closed her eyes and let out a deep breath, "I cheated on him Lucas…"

"This seems to be a new thing with you," he said angrily.

Haley gave Lucas a look, "Life on the road is so difficult Luke…There are so many temptations, and hot guys are literally throwing themselves at you…I got caught up in all the bull shit, and I messed up. He walked in on me and one of his best friends…"

"You could easily just cheat on me," Lucas said as he laid on his back and looked up at the ceiling.

Haley shook her head, "No I couldn't," she said quietly.

Lucas looked over at her, "And why not?"

"Because I love you," Haley said and then kissed Lucas passionately on the lips.

Lucas kissed her back and smiled; his phone rang, "Hello?" Lucas answered; his face went blank, "Okay," he said, "We'll be there soon." He hung up the phone and got out of the bed quickly, "Get dressed," he said to Haley.

Haley sat up quickly and looked up worriedly at him, "What's wrong?"

"Nathan was in a car crash," Lucas said; Haley put her hand over her mouth and got out of the bed.

**xxx**

Brooke walked into Nathan's room and saw him sitting there with a grimace on his face. She stood beside his bed and ran her hand along his cheek. He looked up at her and smiled, "Hey," he said; his voice raspy and dry.

"I talked to the doctor," Brooke began, "He said that you got pretty beat up, but you should be out of her in a few days…" She stopped and looked down at the ground, "And he said Rachel is going to be okay, too."

Nathan tried to grab Brooke's hand, but she pulled away, "Brooke you have to listen to me…"

"Did you sleep with her?" Brooke asked as tears streamed down her face. He looked up at her and didn't say a word, "Did you sleep with her Nathan?" She repeated.

Nathan swallowed the lump in his throat and closed his tear filled eyes, "…Yes," he said. Brooke turned to walk out of the room, "Brooke," Nathan called for her.

Brooke turned around and looked at him, "How could you do this to me?" She asked, "I thought you loved me."

"I do love you," Nathan began, "I got caught up in the moment…"

"Was today your first time?" Brooke asked.

Nathan shook his head, "This has been going on for a week," he began, "But we just recently started sleeping together."

"I want a divorce Nathan."

**xxx**

Peyton stood outside the hospital and watched a little girl walk in holding tightly onto her mother's hand. She smiled and rubbed her own belly; she heard footsteps behind her and turned to see Lucas walking towards her. He stood beside her with his hands in his pockets, "How you doing Peyton?" He asked.

"Pregnant, bitter, pissed off, upset, emotionally unstable," she said, "How are _you _doing?" Sarcasm dripped from her tongue.

Lucas sighed and looked up at the clouds, "Who's Rachel?"

"Nathan's secretary," Peyton began, "And I think he was having an affair with her…"

Lucas looked down at the ground and shook her head, "Why he would cheat on Brooke is beyond me."

"Because people are stupid," Peyton said with a dry laugh, "He had everything with Brooke, but he saw a thrill with that slut and took it."

Lucas looked at her, "Do you think this is it for them? I mean, they're in love…Everything's going to be okay," he said hopefully.

"Lie to yourself enough and you'll start to believe things are actually getting better," Peyton said and then walked back into the hospital.

**Read and Review, please.**

_**Sorry if it's short…**_


	34. Fast Cars

**The Bitter Taste**

**Fast Cars**

_She_ _doesn't_ know _what's right and she_ _doesn't_ _know what's wrong, she only the_ _pain_ _that comes from waiting for him __so__ long. And she doesn't count the_ _teardrops_ _that she's cried while he's away_, _cause_ _she know_ _deep down_ _in he_r _heart_ _he'll be back again_ _someday_.

**xxx**

Brooke snapped shut her Louis Vuitton suitcase and took another sip from her wine glass. She turned up her stereo to play some Blink 182, and sat on her bed looking at her car keys. She looked up and saw Lucas coming in towards the bedroom; he looked at her packed suitcases and sighed, "You're not thinking about leaving are you?" He asked; even thought he already knew.

"I called Lily," Brooke said; her voice tired and raspy from crying, "I'm thinking of going back up to New York and maybe making a comeback album or something. Maybe a guest spot on Oprah; she's having a show about women whose husbands have fucked their secretaries," she said bitterly.

Lucas heard the pain in Brooke's voice. He watched as the brunette wiped a tear from her cheek quickly, "So you're just running away from all of this?" Lucas asked, "Do you think that's going to solve anything?"

"Don't give me your philosophical shit Luke," Brooke said as she poured herself another glass of wine, "Nathan, you're brother, my husband-fucked his secretary. That's called having an affair!"

"You think I don't know that?" Lucas said angrily, "I'm pissed at Nate for what he did to you!" Brooke crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, "But I know for a fact that he loves you more than life itself. Hell, he would give up anything for you."

Brooke let out a dry laugh, "He wouldn't give up a quick romp with his secretary," she said with piercing eyes, "This isn't high school anymore. It's not like he and I are just dating or _boyfriend and girlfriend_. **This** is real."

"I still don't think you should leave," Lucas said.

Brooke ran her fingers through her hair and sighed, "I'm leaving tonight Lucas…"

Lucas began to walk out the door and looked over his shoulder at her, "You know…This is getting kind of cliché of you. The whole, running away from your problems, thing."

"Do me a favor Luke," Brooke said sternly, "Go do what you do best. Like moping around, fucking Haley, and screwing Peyton over."

Lucas opened his mouth to say something, but stopped. He shook his head and continued walking out the door, "See you in another 6 years," he mumbled.

Brooke heard the front door slam and she closed another one of her suitcases. She set down the wine glass and put on her jacket; she then grabbed her car keys and headed out the door.

**xxx**

_**(3 months later)**_

"Eric," Peyton said as she tried to put a diaper on her son, "Eric Nathan Scott!"

Nathan walked into the baby's room and gave him a kiss on the forehead, "Are you acting up for mommy?" He cooed to the baby. The baby smiled and blew a spit bubble.

"There we go," Peyton said with pride when she finally got the diaper on, "This handsome little man is stubborn."

Nathan smiled and walked into the living room. He looked up at the pictures of him, Peyton, and Eric. When Brooke left the three of them had become a family, Peyton had moved out of her old house and moved into the beach house. Nathan became like a father to Eric, and he and Peyton grew closer. Never romantically, just as friends. He turned on the TV as Peyton walked in with Eric on her hip; she sat down beside Nathan and rested her head on his shoulder.

He switched to MTV and saw Brooke standing on the TRL stage along with Alex and Lily. Peyton looked up and her jaw dropped, "Yikes," she said and cuddled the baby closer to her. Brooke had blonde hair and had gotten super skinny. He skin was almost pale, and her eyes looked tired.

"_I'm Damien here with Brooke Davis and her boyfriend Alex and manager and friend Lily," he said, "Welcome to the show. It's been awhile, and you've done a complete transformation."_

"I'll say," Peyton said.

_Brooke grabbed Alex's hand and brought the microphone up to her mouth, "Yeah, I've just been working a lot on new songs and all that good stuff. And it's really great to be back doing all this stuff again."_

"_Where were you for all that time?"_

"_I was in Tree Hill, North Carolina," Brooke began, "Which is where I grew up, you know, my hometown and all."_

"_What were you doing down there? Did you just need time off, or was there a special reason?"_

"_Actually a friend had come to see me at one of my shows and told me that somebody I had known had gotten in a car crash, so I went down there to see him," she said._

"_Him?"_

_Brooke laughed to herself, "Yes. And you know I had some ups and downs in Tree Hill. I fell in and out of love, but you know one day I was just sitting and my room and decided that Tree Hill wasn't the place for me anymore."_

_Damien smiled at her, "Well, we're all glad your back. And you're actually performing for us aren't you?"_

"_Yes, yes I am," Brooke said with a small giggle as she got her guitar and walked over to another stage._

_**The rain falls on your days  
giving you a reason for mysterious ways  
behind doors the darkness falls  
you pour a cup of coffee, and get talking walls**_

Nathan watched her carefully and then looked at Peyton, "She looks ill…"

"I don't know what's wrong with her," Peyton said.

_**But you can blame it on me  
and the person you thought I wanted you to be  
but don't you blame it on love  
'cause you will regret it then, and from now on.**_

_**Besides from days gone by  
hours seem so slow you think you'll surely die  
you decide to call up a friend  
when she doesn't answer you are close to the end...**_

**xxx**

Brooke walked into her hotel room with Lily and Alex following behind her. "Great show baby!" Alex said as he clapped his hands and then kissed Brooke passionately.

"It was alright," Brooke said as she poured herself a shot of Jack Daniels.

Alex gave Lily a look and she walked out of the hotel room, "You know…I always told you that you would be back for me."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "My husband cheated on me. I had no where else to go. I remembered your phone number. Not a big deal," she said casually.

"Brooke baby," Alex said as he walked up behind her and gripped her tight ass, "Don't tell me you've forgotten all about that mind blowing blow job you gave me last night…"

"I was high," Brooke said as she walked away from him, "Besides…I'm a married woman."

Alex sat down on the bed and beckoned Brooke, "Come on Brookie," he said as he licked his lips, "I know you've been dying for this."

Brooke bit her bottom lip and crawled on top of Alex. She unzipped his pants and put her hand down his boxers, "Excited already?" Brooke teased as she felt the large bulge.

"Don't make me wait, baby," Alex moaned.

Brooke took her hand out of Alex's pants and licked his top lip, "There's no fucking way I'm going to have sex with you," she whispered and then pushed him back.

"You can't do that to a guy," Alex said as he watched Brooke get up from the bed and head over towards the window.

Brooke glared at him, "I'm allowed to do whatever the hell I want."

"Well then," Alex said as he laughed to himself and retrieved something from the desk beside him, "I guess no candy for you," he said as he shook the bottle of pills.

Brooke looked at the bottle of pills and felt her heart beat wildly. She reached for them, but Alex pulled them back. Brooke raised her brow and got on top of him. She took off her shirt and kissed Brooke hungrily, "The things I do…" She said to herself as Alex got on top of her.

**Read and Review, please.**


	35. Like A Man Possessed

**The Bitter Taste**

**Like A Man Possessed**

_You never fall in love the same way twice…_

**xxx**

Brooke looked up at herself in the mirror in her bathroom. She had just snorted up two lines of coke; she wiped her nose and put a cold wash cloth on her forehead. Lily walked into the bathroom and saw her friend rocking side to side. Lily cleared her throat and Brooke looked over to her. She wiped her nose, "Hey Lil…"

Lily smiled wearily, "There's somebody downstairs…They want to see you."

"Can't you see I'm kind of busy," Brooke snapped as her hands began to shake. She looked at Lily's upset face and sighed, "I'm sorry," Brooke said softly, "I'll be down in a minute…"

Lily nodded and walked out of the hotel suite. Brooke wiped her nose once more and looked at herself in the mirror. She had lost 35 pounds since she had left Tree Hill. Her hair was bleached blonde and her skin was pale. Brooke hardly recognized herself, but it was change. And change was good.

She headed downstairs and saw Haley standing in the lobby with her arms crossed. Brooke shook her head and laughed as she walked up to the familiar face, "Let me guess," she began, "Nathan got himself into **another** car accident that I have to come home for. And then Nate and I will fall in love again and everything will just be _peachy keen_," she said sarcastically.

Haley took off her sunglasses and rested them on her head, "Are you always this bitchy in the morning, or did I just catch you on the wrong day?"

"Both," Brooke said as her and Haley walked outside. Brooke took out her cigarettes and showed the pack to Haley, "Smoke?"

Haley shook her head, "I quit. Lucas didn't want to kiss an ashtray anymore."

Brooke looked up at Haley as she lit her cigarette, "You and Luke are still together?"

"Yeah," Haley said with a soft smile.

Brooke took a drag, "So what can I do for you Haley?"

"I saw you on TRL the other day," Haley began, "You look like hell."

Brooke let out a cynical laugh, "And here I thought you came to congratulate me on my comeback."

"I'm here to ask you what the hell you think you're doing," Haley said sternly.

Brooke rolled her eyes, "You were in the music business Haley," she began, "You know all the perks and everything that goes on."

"The drugs you mean?" Haley asked, "The alcohol, the sex, the money…Yeah, I know the perks and everything," she said, "But I never let it get to me. You were always the one that was against drugs, and here you are snorting away what's left of you."

Brooke looked at Haley, "I've changed Hales," she said, "And you know what; if you had my life you would've changed too."

"So this is about Nathan and Rachel," Haley said.

_Rachel._ The name made Brooke's blood boil; she threw her cigarette down and looked away, "No," she said through gritted teeth.

"It's okay if you miss him," Haley said softly.

Brooke glared at her, "Listen Miss Haley, I **don't** miss that lying, no good, son of a bitch. He makes me sick."

"Nathan made a mistake," Haley said as she raised her tone, "God, he loves you more than anything in the world."

Brooke let out a dry laugh, "Lucas tried to tell me the same thing before I left…Nathan isn't worth it anymore."

"So the drugs…You do them just for the hell of it, or are you trying to forget who you are?"

Brooke groaned, "I keep trying to forget you people and Tree Hill, but people like you have to come back and give me a reality check. Well thanks Haley, because you made me realize how much I do hate Tree Hill and the people there."

"Nathan was in the hospital and you left!" Haley screamed, "How fucking selfish are you?"

Brooke took a step back, "I loved him!" She screamed back as a lone tear fell down her cheek, "He cheated on me after everything that we went through!"

Haley took a deep breath and got a picture out of purse, "This is Peyton's baby. Eric Nathan Scott," she said.

"He took Nathan's last name?" Brooke said as she looked at the beautiful baby boy, "Are Peyton and Nathan…" She trailed off.

Haley rolled her eyes, "Not that you care about him or _anything_, but no. They're not together; Peyton moved in with Nathan because they both had been abandoned. All of us are friends and everything's going well…"

"Then why ruin it?" Brooke said softly.

"We miss you," Haley finished. Brooke went to hand back the picture but Haley shook her head, "Keep it. I've got plenty back at home."

Brooke looked at her and smiled weakly, "Thanks," she said, "I guess I'll be seeing you next time I tour near North Carolina."

"Okay," Haley said quietly, "Bye Brooke," she said as the two of them hugged, "Can I ask you something?"

Brooke nodded and bit her lip to hold back the tears, "Yeah…"

"Are you really with Alex?" Haley asked, her worried voice gave Brooke's skin goose bumps.

The hug broke and Brooke looked at Haley, "Yeah…" She said in almost a whisper.

"Be careful," Haley said as she rubbed Brooke's skinny arm. She gave her one last smile and walked towards her car.

Brooke walked up to her hotel room and sat on the bed. Tears streamed down her face and she looked at the picture again. She has missed the birth of Peyton's child. Something that Brooke had once thought was the most important thing in the world. Brooke set the picture down and got out a little box that she kept in her suitcase. She opened the box which held her engagement and wedding ring; she looked at them and wiped her eyes.

Brooke got out her cell phone and found Nathan's number. She called it and heard his answering machine:

_Hey, it's Nathan and Peyton. We're not here right now so just leave a message and you're name and number, and we'll get back to you. _

**BEEP**

Brooke let out a deep breath, "Hi Nathan…It's Brooke," she began, "I called because Haley came and visited me just a couple minutes ago actually. I saw Eric, Peyton, he's beautiful. I wanted you to know Nathan that I left because I wasn't strong enough anymore. The affair," Brooke paused as she wiped her tears, "The affair was really hard on me, Nate. You have to understand that I've tried being strong, and I think I just gave up," Brooke voice got shaky as she began to cry, "And I can't stop thinking about what would have happened if we hadn't given up on each other. One day, I hope you look back at what we had and regret every little thing you did to make it all end. Maybe someday I can go to Tree Hill and confront you instead of leaving this all on your machine, but I don't want to see you, because…It hurts. I hear someone say the name Nathan and all I can think about is you. _And it hurts_. I hope you're doing okay, and I hope you're getting over me. Because right now…I'm getting over you."

Brooke hung up her cell phone and set it on the bed. She wiped her eyes and ran to the bathroom. Brooke leaned her head over the toilet and threw up. She leaned against the wall and closed her eyes.

**xxx**

Nathan and Peyton walked into the house pushing Eric in his stroller. Peyton took him out and bounced him on her hip, "Did you have fun at the Zoo?" She cooed.

"Of course he did," Nathan said as he kissed the little baby boy on the forehead. He looked at the answering machine and saw the red, blinking 1, "We have messages." Peyton walked over and smiled as she hit the Play button.

"_Hi Nathan…It's Brooke."_

Peyton looked up at Nathan and patted his shoulder. She walked out of the room as Nathan sat down and listened to the message.

Nathan walked out onto the deck and sat down beside Peyton; she looked at him and gave him a comforting smile, "What did Brooke have to say?"

"She said that Haley went to visit her," he began, "She said that Eric's beautiful…And she said she hopes that I'm getting over her, because she's getting over me."

Peyton put her hand on Nathan's knee and have him a sympathetic look, "I'm sorry…"

"I always thought that I could somehow save her. When I saw her on TRL, I wanted to kill Alex and I wanted to just go to her and pick her up in my arms," Nathan said sadly.

"It's going to take time Nate," Peyton began, "Brooke was really hurt when the affair happened."

Nathan nodded his head and looked out onto the sand, "I miss her Peyton," he said.

"I know," Peyton said as she hugged him.

Nathan rubbed Peyton's back and kissed her on the forehead, "I'll be back in a couple of days," he said as he got up.

"Are you going to get her back?" Peyton asked as she got up and followed Nathan to the driveway.

Nathan looked at Peyton and gave her a small smile, "I'm going to try…" He said and then got into his car.

**Read and Review.**

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews!**


	36. For Blue Skies

**The Bitter Taste**

**For Blue Skies**

_The past is annoying. It's in everyone's conversations, it's everywhere you go, but you never wanna give it up because at one point, it was exactly where you wanted to be._

**xxx**

_**I hear the clock, it's six a.m.  
I feel so far from where I've been  
I got my eggs and my pancakes too  
I got my maple syrup, everything but you.  
I break the yolks, make a smiley face  
I kinda like it in my brand new place**_

Brooke strummed her guitar as she looked out into the crowd. There were hundreds, probably thousands of people. She was singing for a benefit concert. Brooke looked over and saw Alex standing off stage checking her out; she was disgusted with him.

_**I wipe the spots off the mirror  
Don't leave the keys in the door  
Never put wet towels on the floor anymore' cause  
Dreams last for so long  
even after you're gone  
I know you love me  
And soon you will see  
You were meant for me  
And I was meant for you.**_

She finished off the song and thanked the audience. Brooke hopped offstage and Alex wrapped his arms around her and kissed her passionately on the lips, "Amazing," he said as he slapped her ass. Hard.

Brooke gave him a little smile and walked towards her dressing room, "Who knew you had it?" She heard a voice say.

Brooke turned around and saw Chris Kellar leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, "Look at you," she said with a roll of her eyes, "Still dressing like a 5 year old punk wanna-be?"

"Look at you," Chris retorted, "You look like you haven't eaten in years. And what happened to the sexy, brunette that all of us loved?" He said with a cocky smile.

Brooke walked towards him with her arms crossed, "She got her heart broken."

"Nathan and Haley?"

"No," Brooke said as she rested her hands on her hips, "Nathan and his secretary…Haley and Lucas are together," she said with a devilish grin, "They're in love."

Chris looked away from Brooke and shrugged, "Good for them," he said without any real emotion.

"You're taking this well," Brooke said.

Chris leaned towards her, "At least I'm not some coked out slut," he said; his mouth an inch away from her ear.

"I thought slut was your thing?" Brooke asked as she looked over to all of Chris's groupies.

He laughed, "You know…I like you Brooke. I think you could use a tan, some food, and a new hair color, but I still like you," Chris said and then wrote something on a piece of paper, "And that is why I'm going to give you the number of my hotel room."

Brooke raised her brow, "I'm not a groupie…"

"But you are lonely," Chris said. He knew exactly what she was going through. He knew Brooke was vulnerable and naïve.

Brooke watched as Chris walked onto stage. She looked at the piece of paper and put it in her pocket. She walked into her dressing room and saw Nathan sitting there looking at the pictures of her and Alex. She stopped in her tracks as her mouth dropped. "What are you doing here?" Brooke asked.

"I got your message," Nathan said as he got up and walked towards her.

Brooke crossed her arms tightly around herself, "Then you should understand that I don't want to see you."

"Why? Do have plans with Alex later? Or maybe Kellar?" Nathan said bitterly.

Brooke rolled her eyes, "Don't you have some secretaries to fuck?" She shot back angrily. Brooke poured herself a glass of Vodka and turned back to face Nathan; "If you came here to ridicule my lifestyle then don't bother. I'm doing fine."

"You don't look fine," Nathan said as he looked her over, "You look sickly Brooke."

Brooke took a sip of her drink, "Don't start Nathan…"

"I'm not allowed to worry about you?"

"You shouldn't worry about me," Brooke yelled, "Because I shouldn't matter to you anymore."

Nathan gave her a look, "But you do matter to me…I would've told you that at the hospital but you left Tree Hill so fast."

"Can you blame me?" Brooke asked, "God Nathan…"

Nathan grabbed her hands, "I came here to ask you if you wanted to really get a divorce."

"Yes," Brooke said after some hesitation.

Nathan looked down at the ground and started to pace, "Dammit Brooke!" He yelled as he looked down at her, "I love you so fucking much!"

"Now you know how it feels to have your heart broken," Brooke said.

Nathan knew she was right. He knew she was hurt, too. "Come back to Tree Hill, if not for me then for Peyton. She misses you so much Brooke. You and Haley are Eric's godmother's."

Brooke smiled to herself and then looked up at Nathan, "I'll leave tomorrow morning for Tree Hill."

"Okay," Nathan said as he began to walk out of the dressing room.

"But it's not for you," she said as Nathan turned around. Nathan nodded and continued out of the room. Brooke looked in the mirror and took a deep breath. She saw Nathan's reflection in the window and didn't bother turning around, "I thought you were leaving…"

Nathan sighed, "I don't want things to be like this between us…They shouldn't have to be."

Brooke lit up a cigarette and sat down, "What if I would've had sex with some guy?"

Nathan didn't know what to say. He knew that Brooke was right, but he knew that he also had made a huge mistake.

"See?" Brooke said, "I guess you can understand where I'm coming from."

Nathan watched as Brooke slipped a small, white pill into her mouth. She downed it with a drink and then looked at him, "The drugs ease the pain?" He said with a glare in his eyes.

"Sometimes," Brooke said, "It makes me forget about how I gave my heart out to someone and they just took it and tore it in two."

Nathan looked down at the ground, "I haven't been with anybody since you left. I haven't slept with anyone, I haven't kissed anyone, fuck, I haven't even cuddled with anyone."

"Congratulations," Brooke said sarcastically.

"I fired Rachel," he then said, "I couldn't look at her without feeling like I was going to fucking throw up. She reminded me of everything I've ever done wrong. Sure, you kissed Lucas when we were engaged, but I forgave you because I love you!"

Brooke let out a dry laugh, "Kissing someone and fucking someone are two different things, Nate!"

"You act like I don't feel bad about what happened," Nathan screamed, "I think about us every single night, and I think about how bad I fucked up! Are you happy Brooke?"

Brooke stood up and smashed her cigarette on the table, "This isn't about making me happy!" She screamed back, "I wanted to kill myself after I found out that you had slept with that whore!"

"You are killing yourself!" Nathan began, "The pills, the cigarettes, the alcohol."

"Don't give me the speech," Brooke said as she rolled her eyes, "Now, I need to get dressed and then pack for my little trip to Tree Hill."

"Fine," Nathan said quietly as he walked out the room.

**xxx**

Brooke looked at the slip of paper and knocked on the hotel room door. Chris opened the door and looked her up and down, "Well hey beautiful," he said.

"Shut up," she said and then walked into the hotel room.

Chris laid back on the bed as Brooke leaned against the dresser, "I was beginning to think that you weren't going to show up."

"Here I am," Brooke said with fake enthusiasm.

Chris got up and grabbed Brooke's hand. He brought her on top of him and kissed her hard on the lips. He unbuttoned his pants and took Brooke's hand and shoved it down his pants. Brooke rolled her eyes and rolled off of him and sighed in annoyance. Chris wiped his lips and looked down at her, "You know…The whole point of having sex is for both people to enjoy it."

"You're not enjoying it?" Brooke asked slyly.

Chris groaned and took a swig of his beer, "Aren't you supposed to be like horny as hell?"

"Who told you that?" Brooke asked as she fixed her skirt.

Chris shrugged, "Ever since the whole Nathan thing a couple months ago I figured you'd be fucking every guy who looked at you. And plus, you're hanging around with my man Alex. Now, he's trouble."

"He's also a small dick freak," Brooke spat, "And as for me and Nathan…You don't know shit about what happened."

Chris sat on a chair and looked at Brooke, "Level with me here Davis," he began, "You and I were both hurt once. I know how it feels."

"We don't have anything in common Kellar," she snapped.

"Then why are you here?" Chris asked, "Is it because Nathan was waiting for you after the show, begging for you to come back and give him a second chance?"

Brooke got up and pushed over an empty Vodka bottle letting it smash on the ground, "You're sad Chris, you really are."

"I'm not the one sucking dicks for a line of cock or maybe a bottle of pills," he said knowingly.

Brooke grabbed her coat and put it on, "What I do with my life is my business. So if you think your stupid ass is going to change that…"

Chris cut her off, "Look at you. Thinking you're all big and bad, sweetie you don't know what the real world is really like."

"I know that in the real world husbands don't fuck over their wives," Brooke muttered.

Chris stood up and put his arms on Brooke's shoulders, "Yes they do," he said and then cackled, "Hell, my dad cheated on my mom every day with out baby sitter."

"That explains a lot," Brooke said as she looked down at the ground.

Chris smirked and put his hands on Brooke's cheeks, "Now," he said as he tilted his head and leaned towards her, "Let's see if the rest of you is blonde shall we?" He said with a horny grin, "But you're probably a groomed girl aren't you?"

"Wow," Brooke said quietly.

Chris smiled and licked his lips, "What?" He asked; equally quiet.

Brooke kneed him in the groin and watched him fall to the ground, "We almost had a moment there," she said and then walked out of the hotel room.

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**A/N: Thanks for all the great reviews!**


	37. When It All Falls Apart

**The Bitter Taste**

**When It All Falls Apart**

_The only thing you will ever really need, is someone who will believe in you._

**xxx**

Brooke got off the bus and started walking towards the parking lot, "Welcome home Brooke," she said to herself with a sarcastic laugh. She wrapped her coat tightly around her as the night's chill blew over her. She looked up and saw Nathan leaning against car; Brooke looked down again. She'd be lying to herself if she said she wasn't happy that he was there. Brooke got close to him and let out a cough, "How'd you know I would be here?"

Nathan shrugged, "I've been sitting out here for an hour or so. I figured you'd come around sometime."

Smartass; Brooke thought to herself, "Well, I've already called for a car to come…So you can go home."

Nathan smirked. Brooke hated that smirk. "I was just trying to make things easier for you."

"Gee, thanks Nate!" Brooke said sarcastically as she rolled her eyes, "If you wanted to make things easier then you would've let me have my life in New York."

Nathan sighed, "So this is how it's going to be? You're just going to think back to the past and move on?"

"You know what? Sometimes I wish I could forget the past, even if it means I won't remember you," Brooke said coldly.

"So this is how it's going to be?" Nathan began, "You're going to try and find the most hurtful things to say to me while I just stand here and take it?"

Brooke let out a dry laugh, "You put everything on yourself! God I don't want to fight right now especially in a freakin' parking lot."

"I don't want to fight either," Nathan said, "I want us to talk Brooke. Like two civilized people. Like two people who used to be in love with each other."

Brooke put her hands in the pockets of her jacket, "Christ where do you get this shit?" She said with a laugh as she lit up a cigarette, "You can talk all you want, but all I'll be thinking about is you and that fucking red head screwin' on your nice maple desk that you're grandfather bought your dad."

Brooke walked away and Nathan grabbed her arm, "Fuck Brooke!" He yelled as she struggled to get out of his grasp, "This is the last time I'm going to say I'm sorry. After this you can just go and do your thing."

"I plan on doing just that," Brooke said and then slapped Nathan hard across the face. He let go of her and Brooke watched as her rental car was being parked, "Don't you **ever** lay your hands on me again!" She said through clenched teeth and then walked towards the car.

**xxx**

Lucas looked up and saw a skinny blonde peering into his bedroom. He got up and saw Brooke Davis standing there. Seeing her from far away he wouldn't have even recognized her; the only thing he recognized now was her dark almond eyes and the two dimples that blessed her face.

Brooke knew exactly what Lucas was thinking; he didn't think it was actually her. Brooke tucked a strand of blonde hair behind her ear and let out a small laugh, "Surprise," she said in her usual raspy voice. She was letting her guard down; she was scared. Luke knew.

"Brooke," Lucas said. He was trying to convince himself that this scared looking girl was actually the Brooke Davis he knew. The one he had fallen in love with and given his virginity to when he was in high school, "You're a blonde now?"

Brooke gave him an uncomfortable smile and looked down at the floor, "Yeah," she said with a shrug, "I just thought you know…New city, new hair, new life."

"Haley and Nathan's visits must have made a lasting impression," he said sounding impressed by his two friends.

"I came down to see Peyton's little son, Eric," Brooke began as she began to look at the pictures on the walls.

Lucas smiled, "He's one of the best behaved baby's in the world."

Brooke smiled softly to herself and wiped a little tear that was running down her cheek; she heard the front door open and looked and saw Haley walking into the room, "Brooke Davis," Haley said as she crossed her arms and leaned against the doorframe, "About time you showed up bitch where have you been?"

Brooke laughed; damn did it feel good to laugh. She didn't care about the tears anymore, she needed a good cry. Haley walked up to her and wrapped her arms around her. Haley smiled over at Lucas and he gave her a big hug too. Haley let Brooke cry on Lucas's shoulder; there wasn't jealousy anymore between the two of them. Haley knew that Brooke had been hurt, and she knew that she trusted Brooke. Lucas rubbed Brooke's back and rocked her back and forth as he hugged her.

"It's good to have you back Brooke," he said in almost a whisper. Her voice was too muffled by her own sobs that Haley and Lucas didn't hear her say how happy she felt to be back.

**xxx**

Brooke woke up feeling relieved. Haley and Lucas had let her sleep in the guest bedroom after the three of them stayed up most of the night talking about Tree Hill and everything. The topic of Nathan was avoided, and Brooke wouldn't have wanted it any other way. She rubbed her eyes and looked over and saw Peyton sitting on the chair facing the window. Brooke sat up and looked at her; Peyton smiled and looked down at her watch, "I come here at 11:00 thinking maybe you'd be awake, but then I have to watch you sleep and stare out the window till 1:30?" Peyton teased. She got up from her chair and sat on the edge of the bed. She took a lock of Brooke's hair and laughed, "And to think you used to mimic me about my fake, blonde hair."

"It's good to see you Peyt," Brooke said as the tears began to swell in her eyes. Peyton smiled and grabbed her best friend and hugged her. Brooke didn't want to let go; she wanted to hug her best friend forever and just stay in that moment.

The hug broke but Peyton kept a hold of Brooke's hand, "You need some food Brooke."

"You're so motherly," Brooke said in awe, "It just hasn't quite hit me yet that you have a son."

Peyton laughed and walked out of the room for a second; she came back in with Eric on her hip, "Here's little Eric," she said and then handed him over to Brooke.

"He's so handsome," Brooke said as she held the baby close to her, "Hi cutie," she said softly to the baby as he smiled, "God Peyton…I'd have eight just like him."

Peyton smiled and kissed her son lightly on the cheek, "Don't let that smile fool you. He's going to be a heartbreaker just like Nat—"

She stopped and gave Brooke a half smile knowing that she had brought something up, "It's okay," Brooke said as she looked down at the baby.

"I know I maybe shouldn't be bringing all this up but," Peyton began, "Nathan…God, he's been a wreck since you've left."

"I've heard."

Peyton nodded and looked down at her bracelet, "Brooke, I've given up on love some many times and look where I am…"

"I can't…" Brooke said softly, "He hurt me when I saw him with her. It hurt every single day I was on the road and I was drinking and I was doing drugs to ease the pain…" Brooke slowly began to cry, "I used to be this outgoing, bubbly, fun, flirty girl but that all changed because of him! The reason I left was because I didn't have a purpose here anymore, and I knew that if I stayed that I would only be hurting everyone else."

Peyton rubbed Brooke's hand, "The past can hurt, but you can either run from it or learn from it."

"I learned from it Peyton I really did," she said, "I learned that no matter how much somebody is in love with you they can still screw you over. The world isn't fair and neither is love."

Brooke handed Eric back over to Peyton and got out of bed. Peyton gave her friend one more hug and wiped a tear from her eye, "I love you Brooke…And a hell of a lot of other people do to."

"I love you too P. Sawyer," Brooke said with a big smile; she gave Eric a soft kiss on the head, "And I love you too cutie."

**xxx**

Brooke walked to the river court and stood there silently. Nothing could compare to the river court; she looked around and had to smile to herself. So many things had happened at that court; hearts were broken here, dreams were shattered, lovers were brought together. Everything. Brooke breathed in the calming air and closed her eyes; she felt somebody beside her. It was him. His scent lingered to her nose and his presence gave Brooke a sense of protection and warmth. She looked up at him and he looked down at her.

"And here I thought I was never going to talk to you again," Brooke said.

Nathan crossed his arms and exhaled, "I got divorce papers," Brooke looked up at him, "I've already signed," he handed the papers to Brooke and walked away.

Brooke looked at the papers and saw Nathan's signature. She bit bottom lip and put her head down. She wiped her eyes and put the papers in her purse.

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	38. Coffee & Cigarettes

**The Bitter Taste**

**Coffee & Cigarettes**

_One of the toughest parts in life is deciding when to give up or try harder…_

**xxx**

Brooke sat on the porch swing as Haley and Lucas still slept. They were letting her stay with them for a while until she got settled into Tree Hill. Brooke took a sip of her coffee and looked at the divorce papers which she had sitting beside her; she didn't think it was going to be this hard to sign them. All the anger she felt and all the emotion left her when Nathan had given her the papers already signed. Of course she hated him for what he had done, but she had never really thought about it being over. Brooke ran her fingers through her now brunette hair; after her confrontation with Nathan she had gone to the store and dyed her hair back to her original almond brown. She had also been eating a lot, thanks to Karen and Haley who wouldn't let her skip a meal. Brooke had to smile to herself; it was like she was her old self again. She had the brown hair and she was putting on the weight that she had drastically lost over the last couple of months. It felt good to have some normality in her life after everything had been so fucked up.

The front door opened and Brooke looked up as Haley walked out and stretched her arms out. She took a sip of her coffee and smiled at Brooke, "Morning brunette," she said with a smile, "I love it."

"I knew you would," Brooke said with a pearly white smile.

Haley let out a small laugh and walked over towards the porch swing; she picked up the papers to sit down beside Brooke. She sat down and looked at them, "A divorce?"

"Yep," Brooke said as she bit her bottom lip.

Haley set down the papers and put her hand on top of Brooke's, "Are you okay?"

"You know? The weirdest thing actually," Brooke began as she wiped her nose, "I never thought that I'd be this upset about it…"

Haley sighed and combed through Brooke's hair, "What do you want Brooke?"

"The truth?"

Haley nodded.

"I **want** Nathan to come up to me and kiss me and make love to me. I want things to go back to normal," Brooke said with a hopeful smile, "But it's like…Every time I try to think about us being together all I can think about is the hurt and the pain that he brought to our relationship by doing just one stupid thing with one stupid, stupid girl."

Haley wiped one of Brooke's tears, "You need to talk to him Brooke," she began, "You need to tell him how you feel and you need to listen to him. You walked out without letting him say a word and you didn't get to say a hell of a lot either."

"I know…" Brooke said.

**xxx**

Nathan sat down and switched through the channels, not really paying attention to what was on the screen. He had done it; he had gotten the divorce papers and he had signed them. It took almost all the strength in him to do it, but Nathan knew that it was time to let Brooke go. Nathan couldn't forget the look on Brooke's face when he handed them to her; it was a mix of hurt and confusion, and maybe some anger. Everything had gone by so fast for them, and he had royally fucked it up. Nathan just couldn't watch Brooke hurt herself anymore. He heard the front door open and saw Peyton walking in; she dried herself off and smiled at Nathan.

"It's a hell of a storm out there," Peyton said as she made sure the front door was tightly shut.

"Yeah," Nathan said without any true emotion.

Peyton sat down beside Nate and looked at him, "What's wrong Nate?"

"I gave Brooke those divorce papers last night," he began.

She sighed and put her head down, "I thought you were going to wait a little bit?"

"How long am I supposed to wait Peyt?" Nathan asked, "She's made it pretty clear that she doesn't want to be with me anymore…"

Peyton put a comforting hand on Nathan's shoulder, "Give her time," she said, "I mean…Brooke's been through a lot."

"Yeah…All thanks to me right?" Nathan said sarcastically and then got up from the couch and walked out.

**xxx**

"You two do realize how much I hate you for making me come out tonight," Brooke said as she, Haley, and Lucas walked into Tric. They had forced Brooke to come out even though she was not in any mood to party and be happy.

Lucas put his arm around both Brooke and Haley and looked down at Brooke, "Oh Brooke," he said with a big smile, "You could never hate us." He said as he and Haley laughed.

Brooke playfully rolled her eyes and smiled, "I'm getting a drink," she said as she left the couple to wonder. Brooke pushed through the crowd and made her way to the bar; she sat down and ordered a martini. She looked around and watched as Haley and Lucas danced closely together; just holding each other and laughing. Brooke smiled; she was surprised they weren't married. Brooke looked down at the floor. _Marriage_--a fucking waste of time. She downed her martini and ordered another.

"Whoa there rock star," Peyton said as she rested her hand on Brooke's back and sat down beside her. She smiled and played around with Brooke's hair, "Being blonde too hard for you?" Peyton teased.

Brooke took a sip of her martini and smiled, "Nobody can pull it off like you P. Sawyer."

"How are you feeling B…" Peyton stopped from using her old nickname for Brooke, "How are you feeling Brooke?"

Brooke shrugged off the mistake, "I'm guessing you know about the divorce papers?"

"Yeah," Peyton nodded softly, "You know…I wasn't bull shitting when I said Nathan was in love with you, and I know that he's just thinking irrationally right now."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "God Peyton you're not his mother," she snapped. Peyton gave her a look and Brooke mentally kicked herself; she calmed herself and played with the olive in her martini, "He got the divorce papers himself and signed them. You don't have to make excuses for him."

"You sound like you still want to be with him," Peyton pointed out, "What do you want?"

Brooke took out her cigarettes and smacked the bottom of the pack against her wrist, "I didn't think it was really going to be over…And it just isn't fair that he's the one ending it; I mean…I'm the one who got fucked over."

"I'm you're best friend," Peyton began, "If you're in love with him, god dammit, tell me!" She let out a comforting laugh, "He would take you back so quickly and rip up those papers."

Brooke lit her cigarette and took a drag, "It's like half of me wants to be with him, and half of me wants to get over him."

Peyton watched as Brooke's gaze traveled towards the dance floor; she looked over and saw Nathan dancing with an attractive red head. Peyton looked over to where Brooke was sitting and she was gone. Peyton stood up and looked around, but couldn't find her anywhere.

**xxx**

Brooke took shot after shot as she sat in the VIP room with a couple of people. She laughed as she chain smoked like a chimney and downed shots with the best of them. Brooke crushed out her cigarette and walked outside; everything was blurry. She laughed and lost her balance; she grabbed onto the railing and sat on the steps. Brooke heard footsteps behind her and saw Nathan standing there with his hands in his pockets. She glared at him and lit another cigarette; she blew the smoke and leaned back.

Nathan sat down beside Brooke on the step and he could smell the alcohol from her breath, "You're drunk."

"No shit," Brooke said coldly, "You know…I actually came here to talk to you rationally, but then I saw you bumping on some **red head** so I decided to have my own fun."

Nathan groaned and rubbed his eyes, "Brooke…"

"You know…I never really thought red heads were your type," she slurred, "But I guess you're just full of surprises! And a lot of other stuff too," she said with a dry laugh as she threw her cigarette over the railing of the stairs.

Nathan looked down, "This needs to stop Brooke."

"Whatever," Brooke said as she carefully walked down the stairs and towards the road.

Nathan ran in front of her and grabbed her, "Let me take you home…"

"Hell no!" Brooke screamed as she walked over to Luke's car, "I'll just wait for Lucas and Haley to come out."

Nathan slammed his hand on the top of the car causing Brooke to jump, "Dammit Brooke!" He screamed, "Just because you're leaving doesn't mean I'm letting you go!"

"How can you say you love me if you're in there dancing with another girl?" Brooke said as the tears ran down her cheeks.

Nathan wiped them away and looked into her eyes, "Do you think I would ever make that mistake again? You're everything to me!"

"Sometimes everything isn't enough," Brooke began, "I gave you so much of me, and you made me feel like I was needed. Now I'm here, standing out in the cold and you're begging me to stay."

Nathan grabbed softly onto Brooke's face as he had her against the car, "So that's it…You're just going to forget about you and me?"

"I'm scared Nate," Brooke said; her voice low and raspy.

Nathan wiped his own tear away, "You're scared because you know somebody actually wants to be with you?" He asked, "Without you…Everything means nothing."

"Nate…" Brooke began, but was cut off by a hard, passionate kiss. His hands traveled up her little, blue dress as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

**xxx**

It was that familiar place again; Nathan threw Brooke down on his bed and turned on the radio. Michelle Featherstone played from the speakers as they ripped the clothes off of each other. It was like old times; it was the same bed and the same two people. He still nibbled on her neck like he used to, and she still had that amazing way of making him whisper her name.

_**If I build a wall  
a hundred feet tall  
would that keep you in?**_

"Nathan," Brooke said softly as he kissed her stomach.

_**If I promise not to fight  
at least not tonight  
would you stay the night?**_

The kiss broke and the two of them laid naked on top of each other, "Brooke," Nathan said as he tried to catch his breath.

_**If I wore that little dress  
that you like the best  
would you pass my test?**_

"I think I should go," she said finally.

Brooke got off of him and gathered her dress and underwear, "Don't," Nathan said.

She turned around and looked at him with tears in her eyes, "I can't do this…I'm sorry."

_**Would you stay?  
Would you stay with me?**_

"Will you just stay the night?" Nathan asked hopefully.

Brooke put her bottom lip as she climbed back into bed with Nathan; he wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her cheek, "Goodnight Nathan," she said in almost a whisper.

_**Would you stay?  
Would you stay with me?**_

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	39. Watched My Bad Habits Flush Away

**The Bitter Taste**

**& Watched My Bad Habits Flush Away**

_And there's those occasional nights, when you break down and cry, because you know things will never be the same._

**xxx**

_**I must quit…**_

_**I must quit…**_

_**You…**_

Brooke opened her eyes and looked around the room that she was in. She looked down and saw Nathan's hand around her waist; Brooke carefully got out of the bed and put on her shoes. She crept quietly towards the door and looked once more back at him; she smiled sadly to herself and shut the bedroom door behind her. Brooke walked down the hallway and peeked into Eric's room; she entered the room and stood over his crib. She smiled down at him and ran a finger along his soft cheek.

"You're the last person I thought I'd see walking out of Nathan's room this early in the morning," she heard Peyton's voice say.

Brooke turned around and saw Peyton sitting in a rocking chair with a cup of coffee on her lap, "I didn't even see you there," Brooke said.

"Why are you running from him Brooke?" Peyton asked.

Brooke sighed, "I'm not running from him…I just…I don't want to be by his side when he wakes up."

"Did you…?"

Brooke shook her head, "No…We didn't have sex. We were going to, but I didn't want it to go that far, because I knew I would end up regretting it."

"So what are you going to do now?"

"I don't know," Brooke answered, "I haven't really thought that far ahead yet."

Peyton let out a deep breath, "You kind of led him on you know that right?"

"I was drunk Peyt," Brooke said as she sat down in the recliner that was against the wall, "…It didn't mean anything."

Peyton rolled her eyes, "You think you can pull that shit on me Brooke? Of course it meant something…It probably meant everything to you."

"I can't do this right now," Brooke began, "Do you think it was easy for me to kiss him and be in that bed with him? I put up this wall and I almost let him through, but all I could think about was how bad he hurt me…"

"Sometimes you've got to just move on," Peyton said as she put her hand on Brooke's knee, "People are always going to hurt you, and it's your call whether or not they're ever going to hurt you again."

Brooke nodded and gave Peyton a quick smile; she got up and walked out of Eric's room. She looked over and saw Nathan leaning against the wall. She jumped back and put her hand on her heart, "Jesus Christ, you scared the shit out of me!"

"So it didn't mean anything?" Nathan asked; Brooke could see the sadness in his eyes as he looked down at her.

Brooke glared at him, "You were eavesdropping on our conversation?"

"It seems like that's the only way I can get the truth out of you," Nathan shot back.

Brooke scoffed, "Don't even start with that truth crap! You're not exactly the most honest person in this world."

"I at least don't give out a cheap ass kiss!" Nathan said as his voice got louder.

Brooke pushed past him, "You kissed me Nate…Remember?"

Nathan followed her downstairs and grabbed a hold of her arm, "I've apologized Brooke so many fucking times."

"And you think that makes everything better?" Brooke asked sarcastically, "God Nate! I don't think you understand what has happened between us. See, you _cheated_ on me, and it's not like that high school cheating shit, we were **married**! Did you honestly expect me to stay around?"

Nathan let go of Brooke's arm and cross his arms across his chest, "You left when I needed you the most."

"You didn't need me," Brooke said cynically, "You had some trampy slut taking up all your time."

Nathan took a step back and shrugged, "I didn't love her…I never loved her. It's you that I love…It's always been you."

"Don't waste your time on saying things you're only going to take back and regret later on," Brooke said and then walked out of the house.

**xxx**

Lucas pulled into the driveway and looked over at Brooke, "So are you going to tell me why you spent the night at Nathan's or am I going to have to wait for Hales to tell me?"

"I went home with him last night…We made out and we were going to have sex, but I stopped and then this morning we got into another fight," Brooke said as the two of them got out of the car.

They sat down on the porch swing and Brooke squinted her eyes from the sunlight, "Are you going to sign the papers now?" He asked.

"I guess now I have to," Brooke said with a little shrug, "It's weird though…I never thought it'd really be over."

Lucas gave her a sympathetic smile, "That's how it was with me and Peyton…I never could imagine life without her, but then as the days went by I realized that I could live just being her friend."

"I don't know if Nathan and I can ever be friends," Brooke said with a hopeful laugh.

Lucas chuckled and put a friendly arm around Brooke, "You're smart Brooke…I think you can decide what you want to do with your life."

Lucas walked into the house and Brooke got the divorce papers out of her purse. She got out her pen and looked at them for a second. She sighed and walked into the house.

**xxx**

It was a beautiful, dark night as Nathan stood on the beach; it was the same place where he and Brooke had made love and decided that they wanted to be together. He sat down on a huge rock and threw pebbles into the water. He saw Brooke walk over towards him; he looked down and kicked the sand around a little bit.

"You're late," Nathan said.

Brooke moved a strand of hair out of her face, "Yeah…I had some things to think about before I came."

"So…" Nathan said after a few seconds of silence, "Why'd you need to see me?"

Brooke took the papers out of her purse and handed them to Nathan, "I signed them," she said as she turned to hide her teary eyes.

Nathan looked at them for a second and then looked back up at Brooke, "Wow…So this is it?"

"I don't want us to completely hate each other and ignore each other," Brooke began, "But I do want us to be happy."

"What will it take you to understand that I'm not lying when I say I need you?" Nathan began.

Brooke ran her fingers through her hair, "You gave me those papers first already signed; I'm doing what you and I both want."

"You want this?" Nathan asked as he held up the papers.

Brooke nodded and handed Nathan her wedding ring, "It was real wasn't it? We were just two kids, but we really loved each other."

"It was real," Nathan said softly as he took the ring and put it in his pocket, "It still is…"

Brooke gave him a sad smile and shook her head slowly, "It's not Nathan…It's time to let it go."

"Fine…Then this is it," Nathan said as he stood up and faced Brooke.

Brooke put her hand on Nathan's arm, "Bye Nathan…"

Nathan watched Brooke walked down the beach; that was it. It was over, and Nathan didn't know how to think. He had given Brooke the papers, but he didn't think she was actually going to sign them. There it was her signature. Nathan sighed and walked back up to his house.

He got a beer out of the fridge and sat down; Peyton walked in and sat down beside him. She looked at the signatures on the paper and gave him a sympathetic look, "You know Nate, just because something ended, doesn't mean it shouldn't have happened."

"I just lost the only thing that was ever worth fighting for," Nathan said and then walked out of the kitchen.

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	40. Sometimes We Fall

**The Bitter Taste**

**Sometimes We Fall**

_Difference between_ _giving up_ _and_ _letting go_: _Giving up is sacrificing what was rightfully yours. Letting go is forgetting what was never yours…_

**(1 Month Later)**

**xxx**

"One, two, push!" Lucas said as he pushed Eric in a swing. Eric giggled and Lucas looked over at Peyton who was smiling.

"Thank you so much for coming to the park with me and Eric," Peyton began, "Nathan's been so busy with work lately…"

Lucas nodded in understanding, "He's been working a lot lately."

"Yeah," Peyton said softly, "Ever since the divorce he's kind of made up busy work for himself."

Lucas sighed, "And Brooke has that new boyfriend right?"

Peyton rolled her eyes, "Jack," she said, "More like Jack **_ass_**…"

"He's the punk rocker who got wasted at my mom's birthday party a couple weeks ago right?" Lucas asked as he remembered the night, and about the idiot who got completely hammered and stood on a table and started to sing "It's Raining Men" to his mom.

"That's Mr. Charming himself," Peyton began, "It's like ever since the divorce she's been dating these deadbeat guys. Brooke has that job at the café and TRIC, and this Jake guy doesn't even have a job. He's been married once and has two kids with two different women."

Lucas rolled his eyes, "Well I think Nate has officially ruled himself out of the dating game…"

"Yeah…I've tried to talk to him about it at home, but he just grabs a beer out of the fridge, gives Eric a kiss on the cheek, and then goes up to his room…He's changed so much from this."

Lucas handed Eric over to Peyton and rubbed his head, "It's sometimes weird to think that you have a son."

"Yeah," Peyton said as she bounced Eric on her hip, "It's kind of surreal in a way…Who ever thought it could happen?"

Lucas smiled and looked down at Eric, "I can't wait till Hales gets pregnant."

"Get married first," Peyton said with a dry laugh, "Trust me, it's easier that way."

"I'm thinking about maybe popping the question this weekend or something," Lucas said as he pulled a small, velvet box out of his pocket, "I've been carrying this around for a good week or two."

He opened the box and a sparkling, diamond ring sparkled, "It's gorgeous Luke," Peyton said in awe, "She'll love it!"

"Thanks," Lucas said and then put the box back in his pocket, "You know I really appreciate that you're letting me into Eric's life."

Peyton smiled as they headed towards the car, "All that stuff I said to you before Lucas…" She began.

"It's okay," Lucas began, "I would've probably been saying the same things if I would've been in your position, but I'm glad that we can be friends like we used to be."

Peyton smiled, "Yeah…Like we used to be," she said softly as she got into the car.

**xxx**

Nathan sat at his desk and looked through all the paperwork he had. Most of it he had given to himself because the though of not being busy made him ill. He heard a crash outside of his office and looked up to see a guy standing there laughing to himself. Nathan got up and walked over to him, "Is there a problem?" Nathan asked.

The guy picked up the sign he had knocked over and gave Nathan a look over, "Nice monkey suit," he said as he cracked his knuckles, "I just knocked over a sign, buddy. No need to worry," he said as he brushed off Nathan's shoulder.

"I'd really appreciate it if you didn't touch me," Nathan said to the guy. Nathan stood a good few inches above the guy, and had a better build then him.

"Jack!" Nathan heard a voice yell. Nathan looked over and saw Brooke walking over towards the guy and grabbing his arm, "What the hell are you doing? I told you the car that we were buying!"

Jack ripped his arm away from Brooke's grip and glared down at her, "Don't yell at me in public," he said through clenched teeth; he looked over at Nathan and smiled, "Besides…I was just chatting with this nice guy over here."

Brooke looked at Nathan and Nathan looked down at the ground, "Jack, we need to go come on…"

Jack grabbed Brooke's arm and shoved her against a car, "Brookie baby," he said cynically.

"Hey!" Nathan said as he pulled Jack off of Brooke. Jack stumbled backwards and watched as Nathan protectively stood in front of Brooke.

Jack laughed to himself, "So this is the ex husband, Brookie? Nathan Scott?"

Nathan looked back at Brooke and Brooke nodded her head, "Yeah…" She said softly, "This is Nathan…Nathan, this is Jack."

"Her boyfriend," Jack spit and then threw his hands up, "Find your own ride home," he said and then walked out of the dealership.

Nathan gave Brooke a sympathetic look, "Come on," he said as they walked into his office. Brooke sat down across from him, as Nathan sat back down at his desk. He looked at his watch which read 1:23, "I'm done at 1:30…You think you can handle a good 7 minutes in here until I can take you home?"

"I can call Peyton or Haley or somebody," Brooke said as she played with the material on her jeans, "You don't have to do this."

Nathan shrugged, "You've ignored me for a good month it's the least I can do," he said sarcastically, "You told me that you didn't want us to hate each other, or completely ignore each other."

"It's hard Nate," Brooke began, "You think this is what I want? I don't want you to see me get yelled at by my boyfriend, or have to protect me…"

Nathan put his jacket on and got up, "Come on a few minutes won't matter…"

Brooke nodded and followed him out to the car, they got in and Nathan revved the engine to his car, "I'm sorry Nate."

"You moved on Brooke. I understand," Nathan said as he pulled out of the parking lot.

Brooke sighed, "I'm sorry for making things weird between us," she started, "I mean, I want you to date! I want you to have sex and get drunk!"

Nathan laughed and looked over at her, "You're telling me to have sex?"

"I'm ordering you to have sex," she said with her dimpled smile.

Nathan nodded and smiled, "Whatever you say Brooke…"

He pulled into Lucas and Haley's driveway and looked at Brooke, "You going to TRIC tonight?"

"I might make an appearance," Brooke said with a giggle, "Thanks for the ride."

Nathan smiled, "Bye."

Brooke walked into the house and saw Haley looking out the kitchen window, "Spying much?"

"Was that The Nathan Scott that just drove you home?" Haley asked as she swallowed a spoon full of peanut butter.

Brooke rolled her eyes, "Yes and did you just eat a spoonful of peanut butter?"

"Yes," Haley said with a big smile, "And what did you two talk about?"

Brooke shrugged, "I just told him that I don't want things to be awkward, and that he should go out and date and have sex." Haley raised her brow, "What?" Brooke whined.

"Be careful what you wish for," Haley said in a sing-song tone as she continued washing the dishes.

**xxx**

Brooke sat down with Jack across from Haley and Lucas. They took back shots and laughed together. Jack kissed Brooke on the lips, "I'll be right back," he said.

"Okay," Brooke said as she watched Jack get up from the table and disappear into the crowd of people.

Haley nudged Lucas as they looked over and saw Nathan walk into TRIC with a beautiful blonde linked to his arm. Brooke turned around and saw Nathan and the new girl coming towards them. Brooke would be lying if she said she wasn't jealous; the girl was gorgeous. She looked like the type of girl that came from a family with a lot of money, with parents that loved each other, and the whole white picket fence type deal.

"Hey guys," Nathan said as they sat down, "This is Veronica."

Brooke giggled, "Like the Spice Girl?"

Everyone looked around and Veronica politely laughed, "Well I guess you could say that…I was actually named after my Great-Aunt."

"Oh…That's nice," Brooke said as she took another sip to hide her embarrassment because of her lame joke.

_Veronica._ Figures she would have a name like a stripper. Brooke watched as her and Haley laughed; the blondes always stuck together. Brooke was caught off guard when Veronica lightly put a hand on her knee.

"Nathan tells me you're a singer," she said with a big, white smile. Brooke could tell that her teeth probably cost her thousands of dollars to be that perfect.

Brooke nodded, "Yeah I am…What do you do?"

"I'm a lawyer," she said without cockiness or anything, "I work for my dad's firm."

Brooke smiled and felt herself sink into her chair. For a moment she felt like a complete idiot; she was a singer, well **ex **singer and this girl was a lawyer.

Veronica 1, Brooke 0.

"How did you two meet?" Haley then asked.

Veronica smiled at Nathan as he squeezed her hand, "Weirdest thing," she began, "I'm driving and my car gets a flat. So I'm on the side of the road and Nathan pulled up, changed the tire, and then we just started to talk and he invited me tonight."

Haley smiled and then looked over at Brooke almost giving her a look like, 'I told you so!' Brooke stopped herself from giving Haley the big 'fuck off' look.

"I'm going to find Jack," she said to the table and then looked at Veronica, "It was so nice to meet you!"

Veronica stood up and hugged Brooke, "It was nice to meet you too sweetie. Hurry back soon!"

"Oh I will," Brooke said sarcastically once she was ear shot away from the table. She looked back and saw the four of them laughing like they had know Veronica for years. She fit in; they liked her.

Brooke walked around the club eagerly trying to find Jack, but he was no where. She walked outside and saw Jack's turned on and the windows foggy. Brooke ran over and opened the door and saw Jack and a girl that looked like she was 16 fucking in the backseat. She slammed the door and walked away from the car; she clenched her fist and walked back over to the car and opened up the door again. Brooke slapped Jack in the face and then walked away.

"Brooke!" Jack yelled as Brooke kept walking; she turned around and saw him tripping on his pants as he tried to put them on, "Brooke!"

He finally caught up to her and grabbed both of her arms and shook her; Brooke could see the mark on his face where she had slapped him, "What gives you the right to hit me like that?" He screamed in her face. He smelled of booze and cigarettes.

"What gives you the right to fuck some other girl?" Brooke screamed back at him; the girl stood a couple feet back and watched nervously, "For god sake's Jack she's a child!" Brooke yelled and then pushed him away from her.

Jack grabbed Brooke and threw her to the ground, "Do you know how many times we've had sex since we've been together? Twice! A man can't work like that," he said and then slapped Brooke hard across the face.

It stung like hell. Brooke put her hand on her face as she tried to get up, but Jack just pushed her back down, "Fuck you Jack!"

Jack grabbed a handful of Brooke's hair and brought her face to his, "You want to say that again?" Jack screamed as he pushed her face down onto the rocks.

Brooke let out a cry and tried to crawl away, "Fuck…You…JACK!" She screamed once more.

"Bitch," Jack muttered as he grabbed her neck and brought his fist back.

Brooke closed her eyes and prayed to God that he would regain control; she felt his grip loosen and heard him hit the ground. She opened her eyes and saw Nathan punching him in the face. She also saw Lucas kicking him in the stomach. Brooke felt Haley's hands wrap around her and bring her close.

"Are you okay?" Veronica said to Brooke as she knelt down beside her.

Brooke nodded, "Yeah…Sorry you had to see this."

"It's fine," Veronica said, "I've seen hundred of cases like this before.

Veronica 2. Brooke 0.

Brooke forced a small smile and watched as Jack was curled up on the ground spitting up. Nathan knelt down beside her as Lucas and Haley ran to go get the car, "You're always saving me," Brooke said as she looked up at Nathan.

"You need to be saved sometimes Brooke," Nathan said with a laugh as he brushed a piece of hair out of her face.

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	41. I Must Quit

**The Bitter Taste**

**I Must Quit**

_You can try your hardest; you can do everything and say everything. But sometimes people just aren't worth trying over anymore. They aren't worth worrying about. It's important to know when to let go of someone who only brings you down._

**xxx**

Brooke slowly opened her eyes and felt the room spinning around her. She sat up, which was a big mistake, and put her hand on her head. She looked around and saw that she was on the couch in Nathan's living room. Brooke looked over towards the chair and saw Peyton sitting there feeding Eric as she watched TV. She looked over at Brooke and smiled as she set Eric down in one of his many cribs which were around the house.

"Morning Sleeping Beauty," Peyton said as she came over and sat next to Brooke.

Brooke gave her a sarcastic grin and put her head back down on the pillow, "How long have I been out for?"

"Well…We brought you home at 2 or so in the morning, and it is now 5:35 in the evening," Peyton said as she looked at the watch on her wrist.

Brooke groaned and rubbed her temples, "Sorry about last night…"

"Brooke," Peyton said as she put on her motherly tone, "You don't have to be sorry about anything."

"I made an ass out of myself in front of _Veronica_," Brooke said with a bitter tone, "She probably thinks I'm white trash who dates white trash guys like Jack."

Peyton rubbed Brooke's head, "Veronica actually thinks you're a gorgeous girl, and she doesn't think any less of you. She knows about you and Nate and what happened between you two, and I really think she's being a good sport about it."

"So now everyone's falling in love with her," Brooke mumbled to herself.

Peyton gave Brooke a look, "Brooke…"

"Sorry," Brooke said like she was a child that was getting in trouble, "I'm a little jealous okay? I'm dating this ass hole, and Nathan shows up with this beautiful girl who's a lawyer and has everything going for her. He's probably relieved that we're divorced."

Peyton went to say something, but turned when she saw Veronica and Nathan walking down the stairs hand in hand. They walked over to where Brooke was lying down and Veronica sat down across from her and smiled, "How are you feeling Brooke?" She asked.

"Better," Brooke said with a small laugh, "I have an ass of a head ache though."

Veronica grabbed Brooke's hand and rubbed it, "How about I make you a special cup of tea that my mom used to make me when I had head aches?"

"That'd be great," Brooke said, "Thank you."

Veronica smiled genuinely and got up and headed towards the kitchen; Peyton smiled down at Brooke and followed Veronica into the kitchen. Nathan watched the two of them go and looked down at Brooke who was looking away from him. He sighed and sat down where Peyton had been sitting; he put his hand on Brooke's back and rubbed it lightly.

"I'm really sorry about all of this," Brooke finally said; Nathan gave her a look and Brooke continued, "I mean…You were with Veronica and I ended up getting into some deep shit, and you had to take care of me…I'm sorry I kind of ruined your night."

Nathan shook his head, "You didn't ruin my night," he began, "I wasn't going to let that guy hurt you."

"I feel like I'm always looking for you to get me out of bad situations, and I know you have a life to live," Brooke said sadly.

Nathan combed his fingers through Brooke's hair and looked in her the eyes, "You're still in my life Brooke…I just can't forget about you, and pretend that what happened between us didn't happen because you made me happy. Just because we're not together anymore doesn't mean I don't still care about you. I'll always care about you; even if we both get re-married and have 4 kids, I will still care about you."

"Wow Nate," Brooke said as she wiped a tear from her cheek, "That means a lot to me…Thank you."

Veronica walked back into the living room holding a tea cup, "One cup of hangover tea for you Brooke," she said and giggled at her own joke. She sat on Nathan's lap and watched as Brooke took a sip.

"It's delicious," Brooke said and then took another sip, "Thank you so much."

"Anytime," Veronica said, "I mean…We're friends."

_Friends_. Brooke thought to herself as she watched her new friend kiss Nathan. Maybe it could work; maybe they could just move on and leave the past in the past. The doorbell rang and Jack walked through the front door. Or maybe, Brooke thought to herself, the past would all catch up to them.

**xxx**

Brooke pushed Jack outside and put on her jacket; she closed the front door and glared up at him, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry Brookie," Jack said with a warm smile. Brooke knew what he was trying to do, he had done it before. He would apologize, it would be okay for a couple days, and then it would go back to the yelling and the hitting.

Brooke rolled her eyes, "Do you think I'm that dumb?" She asked, "It's over Jack. I'm not going to be somebody's punching bag for the rest of my life. So just leave."

"Do you think you're going to get back with that Nathan guy?" Jack said with a cynical laugh, "You're dreaming sweetheart. He's head over heels in love with that blondie. I can see why, you don't amount to shit compared to her."

Brooke clenched her fists, "I don't want Nathan back. We're friends and that's what we both want. As for him and Veronica they're happy and I'm happy for them. I'm **going** to find somebody new Jack, and you can choke and die for all I care."

Lucas walked up towards the two of them and stood beside Brooke, "Is there a problem?" He asked.

"Nope," Jack said as he backed away, "I was just saying bye to Brookie here." He gave them both a fake smile and looked at Brooke, "I'm not going to be here when you find out that all these people are going to turn there backs on you."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "I know…" She said as Lucas put a comforting arm around her. Jack got into his car and drove off, Lucas looked down at Brooke, "Let's go," she said and then headed towards the car.

"So that's the last of Jack?" Lucas asked as they drove towards the house.

Brooke smiled and nodded her head, "Yeah…"

"How about you let me and Hales decide who you date from now on," he joked.

Brooke laughed, "That could work," she said and then looked at Lucas, "What's with the big smile that you have painted on your face?"

"I'm proposing tonight," Lucas said as he looked at Brooke.

Brooke's jaw dropped, "Luke!" She squealed, "Should I be in the house tonight?" She teased.

"Don't worry," Lucas said with a laugh, "I'm renting a hotel room so we all can have our privacy."

Brooke bit her bottom lip and shook her head in amazement. She looked out the window and thought about her own marriage. All in all it was an amazing experience; and she had never felt so much joy in her life.

"_Will you marry me Brooke?" Nathan asked as he got down on one knee in Karen's Café._

_Brooke cupped her mouth and felt the tears roll down her rosy cheeks, "Nathan…" She whispered._

"_I love you Brooke Davis, more than life, more than anything," he began, "Please…Be my wife."_

_Brooke smiled and nodded, "Yes," she said. Nathan slipped the ring on her finger and stood up. He kissed her passionately, "I love you…"_

**xxx**

Nathan walked into the den and saw Veronica looking through pictures. He smiled and came up behind her and kissed her neck softly, "Hey you," he said.

Veronica turned around and kissed him passionately on the lips, "Hey baby," she said softly and then kissed him again.

"What are you looking at?" Nathan asked as he and Veronica sat down on the couch that was down there and looked through the pictures.

Veronica smiled, "Now if guys like you would've gone to my high school then I probably wouldn't have been such a good girl." Nathan laughed and kissed Veronica on the forehead. They skimmed through the pictures and Veronica stopped at one of him and Haley hugging, "Did you two used to date?"

"Yeah," Nathan said, "Actually…We were married once…"

Veronica let out a laugh, "Right," she said and then stopped laughing, "Are you serious?"

"Yeah," Nathan began, "We got married out junior year of high school and then we got divorced and that's kind of where Brooke came in, but Brooke and I waited a whole while longer before getting married."

Veronica ran her fingers through her blonde hair, "Wow…Married and divorced…Twice."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Nathan began, "I don't actually start conversations by telling people about my marital statuses."

"It's fine," she said and then gave Nathan a kiss on the cheek, "Let's go for a walk on the beach." Nathan smiled and set down the pictures; he grabbed Veronica's hand and headed up the stairs.

**xxx**

Brooke lay on the beach and looked up at the stars. She closed her eyes and just listened to the waves crash into the shore. She felt somebody sit down beside her. Nathan looked down at her and gave her a little wave. Brooke laughed and sat up, "You're just popping up everywhere," she teased.

"Veronica and I went for a walk," Nathan said, "She went back up the house to take a bubble bath."

Brooke raised a brow and gave her signature smirk, "And you're not in there joining her?"

Nathan laughed and Brooke even saw him blush a little. They were joking around just like friends, but they both knew that they were never going to be friends, not after everything. "I've only known her for a couple days," he pointed out.

"And when has that stopped you before?" Brooke asked with a smile, "You've changed," she said after a moment.

Nathan looked at her, "Oh yeah? How?"

"You used to be this confident, sexy, player type of guy," she began, "Now you're all shy and acting like a virgin when I bring up sex."

Nathan smirked, "At least I'm still sexy right?"

"There he is," Brooke said as she began to clap, "The old, but new Nathan."

Nathan sighed and scratched his head, "The old Nathan's kind of packed up and gone."

Brooke was glad it was dark; she couldn't bear for Nathan to see the pain in her eyes. She got up and put her hands on her hips, "We're not 50 years old Nate," Brooke said as she took his hand and ran out with him into the water.

Nathan stopped and looked at her like she was crazy, "What the hell are you doing?"

"Lightening the mood," Brooke said as she danced around in the water, "Having a little fun!" She kicked water towards Nathan.

He looked down at his wet shirt and shorts and raised his eyebrows, "You know what Brooke," he said with fake seriousness and then ran into the water and picked her up, "The water's kind of cold isn't it?"

"Nathan Scott!" Brooke screamed, "I swear to God if you drop me in this water I'll…" _Splash!_ Brooke stood up and felt the water all over her body; she looked over and saw Nathan on the shore pointing and laughing at her. "You think that's funny?" Brooke asked as she walked over towards him.

Nathan nodded, "Yeah…I do."

Brooke lunged at Nathan and tackled him to the ground, "Ha! Now you're all wet!" She said as she wringed her hair out on his face.

"I give! I give!" Nathan yelled with laughter.

Brooke smiled and put her hands in the air, "And the winner and remaining champion is…Brooke Davis!"

Nathan looked up at her and she looked down at them. They smiled at each other and Nathan messed up her hair a bit, "You're so cute when you're all wet…"

"Yeah, thanks to you," Brooke said and then got off of him. She wrapped her towel around herself and picked up her shoes, "I should get going."

Nathan wiped off some sand from his shirt, "You can come inside for a little bit," he suggested.

"No," Brooke said, "I've got to get back; I finally have the house to myself tonight."

Nathan looked at her in confusion, "Is Lucas proposing tonight?"

"Yeah," Brooke said. The mention of marriage still stung a bit.

Nathan smiled, "Good for them," he said and then started walking towards his house, "Bye Brooke."

"Bye Nate," Brooke said and then walked in the opposite direction.

Nathan walked into the house and saw Veronica and Peyton sitting on the couch. Veronica got up and gave Nathan a worried look, "Baby, you're all sandy and wet!"

Peyton stood up and looked at Nathan; he'd be kidding himself if he didn't think Peyton looked somewhat pleased. "Yeah, I wanted to see how the water was," he said.

"Alright silly," Veronica said and then gave him a kiss on the tip of his nose, "I'm going to head home so I'll call you sometime tomorrow," Veronica said and then kissed him passionately, "Bye," she said with a wink and then walked out of the house.

Nathan looked over at Peyton, "Don't say a word," he warned her.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Peyton said with a shrug, "_Silly_…"

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	42. Let The Fun Begin

**The Bitter Taste**

**Let the Fun Begin**

_Your memory is a way of holding onto what you are, what you love, and what you never want to lose._

**xxx**

Peyton and Brooke walked into their room and dropped their luggage, "Wow not bad…" Peyton said as she lay back on the big bed.

Brooke sat down on the bed beside her sprawled out friend. She, Peyton, Nathan, Haley, and Lucas had all been invited to Veronica's family cabin for the weekend. Haley and Lucas considered the offer, but because of their recent engagement decided to take the trip to Cancun for their honeymoon instead of going to the cabin with the rest of the gang. Brooke wasn't going to come either, but after Peyton had convinced her that she **needed** to go to keep her company, Brooke gave in.

Peyton let out a deep breath and started to unpack her suitcase, "This is the first time I've been away from Eric," she said as she began to bite on her fingernail.

"He'll be fine with Karen," Brooke said, "I'd trust that woman with anything!"

Peyton smiled, "You're right," she said and put the picture of her and Eric on the bedside table.

"Besides," Brooke said with a sly smile as she pulled a short, black dress out of Peyton's suitcase, "It's time for mommy dearest to have a little fun."

Peyton laughed as she snatched the dress out of Brooke's hands, "I'm not here to find a boyfriend…"

"Who said anything about finding a boyfriend?" Brooke asked with a small shrug, "You deserve to have a little _fun_."

"And by fun you mean a mindless, drunken hook up?"

Brooke smirked and cocked her brow, "Now you're speaking my language blondie!"

"No thanks," Peyton said as she watched Brooke's smirk fall, "I can't do that Brooke…We're not in high school anymore."

"We're also not 40 years old P. Sawyer," she began, "I think you need to let loose a little bit."

Peyton sighed, "I'm a mom now Brooke…"

"So?" Brooke yelped, "God Peyt, you're a total M.I.L.F."

Veronica knocked on the door lightly; Brooke and Peyton both looked up. Veronica gave them a little wave and smiled, "There's this great club about 10 minutes away…I was thinking of calling a taxi, and maybe we could all go down there, have a few drinks, and dance a little bit?"

"That'd be great," Peyton said, ignoring the eye roll from Brooke, "We'll start getting ready."

Veronica clapped her hands together, "Great," she said and then shut the door.

Brooke looked at Peyton as she laughed, "Laugh it off bitch," Brooke said and then lay back on the bed in frustration.

**xxx**

The club was hot, the drinks were flowing, and bodies were touching. Brooke was in the middle of all the madness; she had one hot, blonde behind her, and a sexy brunette in front of her. It felt good to be touched; the boys ran their hands up and down her body. She'd by lying if she said that this wasn't a show for Nathan and his new "girlfriend". Brooke occasionally looked over to the two of them; they had been sitting in the same spot for about 2 hours. Brooke could tell that Nathan was bored with whatever the girl was talking about. Nathan was an outgoing guy; he liked to drink, and he liked to dance. Brooke had to laugh, but then scold herself for getting enjoyment from his bad time.

Nathan tried his hardest to listen to Veronica and what she was talking about, but he couldn't help but look over at Brooke and watch her dance. The way she flipped her hair and the way her hips swayed. He was actually jealous of the two guys that were grinding up on her. Veronica didn't dance; at least that's what she told him. Nathan finished off his drink and asked Veronica once more if she just wanted to go out and dance.

"Nathan," Veronica squealed, "You know I don't dance." Nathan sighed and rested his elbow on the bar; Veronica's cell phone rang. She looked at it and looked back up, "It's my dad," she said and then walked towards the bathroom.

Nathan looked over at Brooke and saw her watch Veronica leave. She made eye contact with Nathan and he gave her his signature smirk. She returned it with her well known brow raise. It was a challenge from the both of them. Brooke **dared** him to come over and dance with her. She didn't think he would actually come over, but he did.

As Nathan made his way onto the dance floor Brooke pushed the other two guys away. Nathan gripped Brooke's hips and as she grinded her ass into his groin. He rested his hands on her hips, she turned and looked up at him; they both smiled. She turned around so that they were face to face. Nathan gripped her ass as Brooke put her arms around his neck. The bulge in his jeans became harder when Brooke licked his lips. He ran his hand through her hair and lightly sucked on her neck. Brooke let out a soft moan as they grinded side to side with each other.

Nathan looked up once and saw Veronica watching the two of them from the sides with a worried look on her face. Veronica shook her head and hurried towards the exit. Nathan looked down at Brooke and she looked back up at him, "Come on," she said as they followed Veronica.

**xxx**

Nathan and Brooke walked outside and found Veronica walking back and forth with her head in her hands. Brooke stood there as Nathan walked closer towards Veronica and put his hands on her shoulders. Veronica looked at him and then back at Brooke, "Do you guys still love each other or something?" She asked sadly.

Nathan looked at Brooke and Brooke looked right back at him, "It was just dancing," Brooke began. Nathan gave her a sympathetic look, but she ignored it. Brooke walked closer to Veronica and grabbed her hands, "I'm sorry…"

"It's fine," Veronica said as she wiped her eyes and let out a little laugh, "I just overreacted a bit."

"No no," Brooke said as she gave the blonde a hug. She refused to look at Nathan.

Nathan sighed, "We should get going," he began, "Where's Peyton?"

Brooke got out her phone and laughed, "I just got a text from her…She said she's having a kick ass time and that she's staying till close, and that she'll call the cab herself."

"Are you sure we should just leave her here?" Veronica asked.

Brooke nodded, "She needs the fun," she said and then got into the cab. Veronica then got in and smiled as Nathan put a comforting hand on her back.

As they drove back to the cabin Brooke couldn't help but smile to herself. Veronica was intimidated by Brooke, and she could tell. During that whole car ride Veronica never once let go of Nathan's hand.

Veronica 2. Brooke 1.

**xxx**

Brooke sat on the couch and sipped her glass of wine; she couldn't hear anything but the fire snapping against the wood. It was peaceful just watching the fire burn. She wrapped her blanket tighter around her and closed her eyes.

Nathan quietly walked into the room and sat beside Brooke on the couch; she opened her eyes and smiled at him, "Some night," she said after a minute or so of silence.

"Brooke," Nathan began. It was in that tone; the tone that guys use when they're about to apologize for what they've done, or what they haven't done.

Brooke just looked at him, "Please don't apologize Nate," she said.

"I don't want to hurt you…"

"Kind of late for that," Brooke said softly and then looked down.

Nathan rubbed his head and looked at the fire, "I guess you're right," he said and then looked at Brooke, "I thought Veronica was the girl that was going to help me forget about you…But it turns out that every time I'm with her all I can think about is you."

"Tell me you don't like think of me when you guys are…You know…" Brooke said as she shuddered a bit.

Nathan couldn't help but crack a smile, "No…We haven't done that."

"Now I understand why you got as excited as a boy at Prom when we were dancing together," she laughed.

Nathan laughed as well, "I wasn't the only one."

Brooke smiled and then hid her cheeks which she knew were turning bright pink. She looked down at the table and saw one of her demo CD's laying there. "You want to listen to something?" She asked.

Nathan nodded, "Let's hear it."

"Kay," Brooke said with a big smile as she popped in her CD and then sat back down on the couch.

_  
All I know  
Is everything is not as it's sold  
but the more I grow the less I know_

Nathan couldn't help but smirk as he watched Brooke sing along to her song. She looked over at him and then let out an embarrassed laugh, "What?"

"You can keep singing," he began, "It's cute."

_And I have lived so many lives  
Though I'm not old  
And the more I see, the less I grow  
The fewer the seeds the more I sow_

Brooke rolled her eyes playfully, "Thanks," she said and began to sing along.

_Then I see you standing there  
Wanting more from me  
And all I can do is try_

Nate liked the song; in fact, he liked it a lot. He scooted closer towards Brooke as the song continued. Brooke looked up at him as he was looking down at her. They both smiled and Brooke looked away.

"This means a lot," she began.

Nathan put his arm around her and rubbed her arm, "You know I love your music Brooke."

_  
Then I see you standing there  
Wanting more from me  
And all I can do is try_

_I wish I hadn't seen all of the realness  
And all the real people are really not real at all  
The more I learn, the more I learn  
The more I cry, the more I cry_

"Have you ever wished that you could just rewind time and do things over again?" Brooke asked.

Nathan nodded, "All the time," he said sadly, "If you had that power…What would you do over again?"

"Us," Brooke said simply.

_  
As I say goodbye to the way of life  
I thought I had designed for me_

_Then I see you standing there  
Wanting more from me  
And all I can do is try_

A tear drop rolled down Brooke's cheek as she looked into Nathan's icy, blue eyes. He took his finger and softly brushed it away.

"What would you rewind?" Brooke asked as her voice cracked.

_  
Then I see you standing there  
I'm all I'll ever be  
But all I can do is try  
Try_

Nathan leaned in closer to Brooke, "I would rewind it to the moment I realized I loved you. So I could relive everything, and change all the mistakes I made," he said softly, "I'd take back **everything** I did to hurt you and push you away."

_All of the moments that already passed  
We'll try to go back and make them last  
All of the things we want each other to be  
We never will be_

Brooke tilted her head as Nathan came towards her and kissed her passionately. She missed the taste; his hands traveled up her shirt. He grabbed her breasts as Brooke let out a soft moan. Brooke ran her fingers through his hair as he undid the button on her jeans. They heard the rain start up outside and Brooke saw the flash of lightning. Nathan put his hands down her pants as they kissed wildly. Brooke helped him take off his shirt and pulled down his baggy jeans along with his blue boxers that she had coincidentally bought him one day before their wedding.

_  
And that's wonderful, and that's life  
And that's you, baby  
This is me, baby_

She whispered his name through gritted teeth as her toes curled. It felt good for her to scratch Nathan's back. He grabbed a hold of her breast as he entered into her. It felt good to the both of them; it was something they had been missing for a while. It was different with other people, nobody satisfied Brooke like Nathan could, and nobody could make Nathan feel the way he did like Brooke could. As vulgar as it sounded, Nathan's dick felt good inside of Brooke.

_  
And we are, we are, we are, we are  
Free  
In our love  
We are free in our love_

Brooke rolled off of Nathan and looked around and saw that they had made it to the floor. The storm was still going on and the fire was still burning. Brooke rolled over and looked at Nathan; she couldn't help but let out a laugh when Nathan smirked. Brooke looked up at the clock and saw that a good hour had passed.

Nathan looked at the clock as well, "Making up for lost time," he said.

"Yeah," Brooke said with a laugh, "You wore me out…"

Nathan sat up and looked out the window at the lightning, "Why is it that every time we've had sex it's been during some sort of storm?"

"Maybe it's a sign," Brooke said with a shrug; Nathan gave her a weird look and she rolled her eyes, "Things are going to weird tomorrow when we go to leave. Veronica is going to think that nothing happened, and it'll just be an awkward situation that I'm not really looking forward to."

Nathan mentally kicked himself, "Shit…Veronica…"

"Are you honestly telling me that you _forgot_ about her?" Brooke asked in disbelief, "I guess you still are the old Nathan."

Nathan kissed Brooke softly on the forehead, "So what happens now?"

"Life," Brooke stated, "Life happens now Nathan."

**xxx**

Peyton walked out of the club and looked through her bag for her cell phone. It had been awhile since she had been a little buzzed; she grabbed her cell phone and it fell down at her feet, "Shit," she cursed to herself.

She bent down to pick it up and looked up; her jaw dropped and she fell to the ground with her hand over her mouth.

"Hey Peyton," the man said with a smile on his face.

Peyton blinked her eyes as she felt the tears begin, "Jake," she said softly…

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**Thanks for all the reviews! You guys are great!**


	43. A Blue Sky Holiday

**The Bitter Taste**

**A Blue Sky Holiday**

_Relationships fall apart. Friendships end. Hearts break. But the love doesn't die._

**xxx**

"Hey Peyton," Jake said as he reached his hand out to help Peyton up.

Peyton grabbed his hand and shivered a little bit; "What are you doing here?" She asked.

Jake laughed to himself and ran his hand through his hair, "I'm actually a bartender here a couple nights a week."

"Jake Jykelski a bartender?" Peyton teased, "If the gang could see you now."

Jake let out a small laugh and dug his hands in his jean pockets, "Who's all here?"

"Well, me, Brooke, and Nathan came down with his girlfriend Veronica because she has some place down here," Peyton began.

Jake looked at her strangely, "Nathan's girlfriend?"

"Yeah," Peyton said, she had forgotten how much he had missed, "Brooke and Nathan got divorced."

He exhaled and his eyes got wide, "Wow," Jake said, "That really sucks. What happened?"

"Nathan cheated on Brooke with this secretary," she said softly, "Anyways, they still love each other…You can just tell."

Jake smiled and looked at his watch, "It's getting late…Do you want to come back to my place for a little bit?"

"Yeah," Peyton said with a big smile.

**xxx**

Brooke slowly got up from the floor and gathered up her clothes. Nathan propped up on elbows and watched her, "You're not going to stay here and lay with me?"

"Don't do this," Brooke said as she slipped on her underwear.

Nathan sat completely up and looked at her, "Do what?"

"Don't act like this is somehow going to solve all our problems," Brooke began, "You still have another girl upstairs that loves you and wants to be with you."

Nathan stood up and walked slowly towards Brooke, "Listen to me," he said softly as he cupped her face, "You can try and push me farther and farther away, but I want you back in my life Brooke. I love you."

"What we just did doesn't make me any better than Rachel," Brooke said in a hurt voice.

Nathan took a step back and crossed his arms, "I'm not married to Veronica."

"You might as well be," Brooke grumbled. Nathan grunted and Brooke grabbed his arm, "I see the look she gives you when the two of you look into each others eyes. And you shouldn't ruin something that could be good just because of me."

Nathan looked down at her and brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes, "Why are you so afraid of being with me?"

"Because," Brooke said in almost a whisper, "Once somebody hurts you once who says they're not going to do it again?"

He stared blankly at her and kissed her softly on the lips, "I'm not going to hurt you Brooke."

"This is hard Nate," Brooke said as she turned and walked towards the window, "What happened…Was so unexpected. I just think we just got out of control."

Nathan punched his fist in his hand and turned away from her, "You know," he said angrily as he snapped back around, "Dammit Brooke! Don't push me away!"

Brooke put her head down and softly began to cry; Nathan's face fell and he walked over towards her. He put his arms around her and rocked her back and forth, "Why do you want me?"

"Because you're my wife," he said simply.

Brooke pulled away from Nathan and looked up at him with her glossy eyes, "But I'm really not Nathan. The divorce was a chance for us to move on and we both did. You might have had better luck than me, but we both moved on."

"So tonight was just some mistake?" Nathan asked.

Brooke walked towards the staircase and then turned around, "Of course not…But I realized something…There is not rewind button in life so we just have to take responsibility for what we do."

"Fine," Nate said as he blew past Brooke and stomped up the stairs. Brooke leaned against the wall and slowly slid down it as she covered her mouth so that her cries didn't come out.

**xxx**

"This place is really nice Jake," Peyton said as she finished off her second drink, "And I can't believe how big Jenny is."

Jake smiled and then closed Jenny's bedroom door slowly, "Yeah, I'm so grateful my parents are helping out. Little girls are a handful."

"Just wait till they're teenagers," Peyton said with a laugh.

Jake laughed as well and the two of them sat down on the couch, "So how's your baby?"

"Good," Peyton said as she got out a picture, "His name's Eric."

Jake looked at the picture and smirked, "Where'd you get the name Eric?"

"He's named after his father," Peyton said softly and then looked away from him.

Jake set the picture down on the coffee table and brought Peyton's face towards him, "It's really good to see you."

"Yeah, you too," Peyton said as Jake grabbed a hold of her hand, "You kind of left suddenly."

Jake sighed and rubbed Peyton's hand, "I needed time to figure things out Peyton…And the whole time I was figuring things out all I could think about was how much I wanted you to be in my life. You never gave up on me."

"When you're truly in love you won't give up on someone," Peyton said as her eyes began to tear, "And sometimes it feels like you just gave up on me."

"Stay with me," Jake said as he passionately kissed Peyton on the lips.

After the kiss Peyton looked at him in shock, "Stay with you?" She questioned, "After at least a year I see you for one day and you're asking me to stay with you?"

"I know this is sudden," Jake began.

Peyton rifled through her hair, "I love you Jake…But I have a baby at home and…"

"Bring him to live with Jenny and me," he said, "We can be a family."

Peyton closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "You don't know how many times I've dreamt of you saying that to me. And each time I thought about it, I just thought about me running into your arms and shouting, 'Yes, yes!' at the top of my lungs. And then we would kiss and hug and everything would be perfect."

"I miss you," he said.

Peyton bit her bottom lip and stroked Jake's cheek, "I know…And I'm going to miss you too."

"So this is a no?" Jake said as he stood up from the couch and walked into the kitchen.

Peyton followed him as she put on her jacket, "I love you Jake," she said once more and gave him a kiss on the lips.

"I love you too Peyton," he said as they hugged.

Peyton wiped some gloss from his cheek and gave him a comforting smile, "It's going to be okay," she said as Jake opened the front door for her.

She stepped out and Jake looked at her one last time, "I know…" He winked at her and then watched her walk away. He closed the door slowly and walked back towards Jenny's room.

**xxx**

Peyton walked into her bed room and got into bed; Brooke rolled over and smiled at her, "Where were you?" She asked, half tired, half intrigued.

"I saw Jake," Peyton answered softly.

Brooke sat up with her mouth open wide, "And?"

Peyton let out a dry laugh, "Nothing happened…He asked me if I wanted to stay with him. Bring Eric back and be a _family_, but…After I thought about it I realized that maybe it was _too_ perfect. I couldn't see Jake raising Eric with me, or see us as a family."

Brooke gave Peyton a sympathetic look and a hug, "You made the right choice P. Sawyer."

"What did you do tonight?" Peyton said as she blinked away the tears that were forming in her eyes.

Brooke laid back down and sighed, "Slept with Nathan," she said.

"Oh," Peyton said in surprise, "Well?"

"Well it wasn't meant to happen," Brooke began, "It just kind of did."

Peyton looked over at Brooke, "What did he say about it?"

"He told me he loved me and that he wanted to be with me," she said, "But I know that Veronica loves him, and I know that he'll eventually fall deeply in love with her."

Peyton rolled her eyes, "You really don't want him to be in love with you?"

"No," Brooke said and then closed her eyes, "Then everything gets so dramatic and then we fall in love and then I get hurt again."

"Maybe it'll be different this time," Peyton suggested.

Brooke turned on her side and shrugged, "I don't have the heart to find out…"

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	44. It’s Not Supposed To Be Easy

**The Bitter Taste**

**It's Not Supposed To Be Easy**

_Don't give up on love, because there is always someone who loves you, even if it's not the person you were hoping for._

**xxx**

Brooke, Peyton, Nathan, and Veronica all walked outside of the cabin and stood in front of the car. They gave the cabin one last look; Peyton put her arm around Brooke and they smiled at each other. Brooke looked over at Nathan and Veronica. Veronica had her arm linked to Nathan's and leaned close against him. Nathan looked over at Brooke and they looked at each other for a moment; Brooke gave him an icy stare and got into the car after Peyton.

Four hours later they pulled into the front of Nathan and Peyton's house. Brooke got out and carried her luggage to the porch along with Peyton. They walked inside and Peyton sprawled herself out on the couch. Brooke poured them each a glass of wine and sat down at Peyton's feet.

"You read my mind," Peyton said with a sigh of relief as she sat up and took her glass.

They both looked over as Veronica giggled and jumped into Nathan's arms. He held her up and they kissed softly on the lips. Brooke finished off her drink and poured another as the couple walked upstairs.

"You going to be okay?" Peyton asked as she glanced from where Nathan and Veronica were standing back to Brooke.

Brooke leaned back and took a sip of her drink, "I'm fine P. Sawyer," she said nonchalantly.

"Really?" Peyton said in a disbelieving tone, "So if Nathan and Veronica were up there fucking you wouldn't be the least bit upset?"

Brooke gave Peyton a look and shook her head, "You act like I'm in love with him or something," she said with a dry laugh.

"That's because you are…"

**xxx**

Brooke walked into Lucas and Haley's house; she came in quietly so that if they were home from their honeymoon doing _whatever_, then she wouldn't disturb them. She walked into her room and saw Lucas and Haley rolling around on her bed. Brooke dropped her suitcase and shrieked, "Gross!"

Lucas and Haley both looked up and quickly covered themselves with Brooke's comforter, "Brooke!" They screamed in unison.

Brooke couldn't help but laugh as she ran out into the kitchen. She grabbed herself a bottled water and ran her fingers through her hair. Haley walked out, fully clothed, and casually leaned again the fridge, "We didn't think you'd be back so early."

"So you decided to fuck on my bed?" Brooke said as she tried to contain her laughter, "Whatever, if that's what turns you on…"

Lucas walked in with his old basketball shorts on and stood beside Haley, "We got back from Cancun earlier, and you know…Your room was just **there**…So…"

"Please," Brooke said as she held up her hands, "Spare me the details…"

Haley laughed into Lucas's chest and then looked at Brooke, "I'm sorry."

"It's fine," Brooke said with an over exaggerated sigh followed with a smirk, "How was Cancun?"

Lucas kissed the top of Haley's head and then sat down, "It was beautiful…I could imagine myself living down there."

"Me too," Haley said as she sat down beside Lucas, "The sunsets," she breathed, "Oh god, the sunsets were amazing."

Brooke couldn't help but smile as the newlyweds kissed, "It sounds great," she said and then sat down across from them.

Haley intertwined her fingers with Lucas and looked attentively at Brooke, "How was Veronica's cabin?"

"It was," Brooke said as she let out a little chuckle to herself, "Interesting to say the least…"

"What happened?" Haley asked.

Brooke looked at Lucas and then looked down at the table; Haley gave Lucas a look and he got up from the table, "Girl talk…My cue to leave," he said and then walked out of the kitchen.

The two girls watched him go and Haley looked at Brooke, "What happened?"

"Nathan and I slept together," Brooke said simply.

Haley's eyes went wide, "Are you serious?"

"Yeah."

"Brooke," Haley said, "That's great!"

Brooke shrugged, "It didn't mean anything Hales…"

"Of course it did," Haley said as she went and sat down beside Brooke and faced her, "You should be ecstatic right now!"

Brooke rested her elbow on the table, "Too bad he was kissing on Veronica after we got home…But I can't be too upset, I told Nathan that I didn't want to be with him."

"You need to learn to trust people again," Haley began as she put her hand on top of Brooke's.

Brooke nodded and quickly wiped a tear from her cheek, the doorbell rang and Brooke got up and answered it. She opened the door and saw Nathan standing there; she saw Haley walk out of the kitchen. Great, she was stuck.

"Yeah?" Brooke said casually.

Nathan sighed, "Can we talk?"

Brooke closed the door behind her and they started to walk away from the house, "What's there to talk about?"

"Us," Nathan said as they walked along the sidewalk.

Brooke folded her arms, "Nathan…" She began.

"Let me talk Brooke," Nathan said as they stopped and he turned to face her, "You have a decision to make. Either stop with this fucking game or let this go."

Brooke glared at him, "What game?"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about!" Nathan yelled, "You miss me and love me one minute, and then the next you're shooting me dirty glares and telling me to stay out of your life!"

"Sorry I'm not perfect Nate!" Brooke screamed, "Sorry I'm not perfect like you're little fucking Veronica who would wipe your ass for you if you didn't have toilet paper."

Nathan grabbed Brooke's arms and looked intently into her eyes, "Don't you get it? That's why I love you! You might not think you're perfect, but you are to me Brooke Davis! I've loved you since the moment I've met you."

"Maybe someday we'll be perfect enough for each other," Brooke said coolly as she walked away.

Nathan put his head down as Brooke turned the corner. He ran towards her and turned her around. He kissed her hard on the lips and brought her in close to him.

"What the hell?" Brooke asked, but Nathan cut her off with a kiss.

The kiss ended and Brooke looked up into Nathan's blue eyes, "I'm not letting you walk away."

Brooke couldn't help but smile, "I was hoping you wouldn't…"

**xxx**

Peyton sat downstairs and hummed softly to Eric as he lay in his crib; he looked over and saw Veronica walking down the stairs. They smiled at each other and Veronica sat down on the couch. Eric had finally fallen asleep and Peyton sat down beside Veronica.

"Nathan and Brooke love each other don't they?" Veronica asked.

Peyton gave Veronica a sympathetic look and nodded, "They have so much history together…"

"I know," Veronica said as she played with the material on her jeans, "Brooke's a great girl…I mean; I can see why Nathan is so madly in love with her."

Peyton put her hand on Veronica's knee and met her eyes, "You're a really great person Veronica," she began, "It's just kind of one of those bad timing things."

"Yeah," Veronica said and then stood up, "Tell Nathan that my dad called me and he's not doing so well so I'm going back home. And tell him that I had a great time."

Peyton stood up as well and gave her a confused look, "You're leaving?"

"Yeah," Veronica said with a shrug, "It's time for me to go…"

Peyton looked towards the staircase and saw Veronica's luggage already sitting there waiting, "Nathan liked you. He really did."

"You don't have to make excuses for him Peyton," she said almost bitterly, "I know him and Brooke had sex that night at my cabin."

"How…?" Peyton began.

Veronica let out a small laugh, "I walked down stairs for some water and there they were…Going at it like two dogs in heat."

"I'm sorry," Peyton said with a little laugh at the way Veronica had explained it.

Veronica gave Peyton a wink and reached out for a hug, "Thanks for being so nice to me."

"Awe," Peyton said as she hugged Veronica back, "Thanks for being such a sweetheart."

They broke the hug, but Veronica kept a hold of Peyton's hands, "Maybe I should give you my number?"

Peyton looked at her in surprise and laughed, "Sure? Why not?"

Veronica took Peyton's cell phone and dialed her number into it, "Keep in touch okay?"

"Yeah," Peyton said as she took Veronica's cell and dialed her own number into it, "This is just incase you need me to talk to."

Veronica smiled and put her cell phone back into her purse, "I hope you find somebody who you love…"

"Thanks," Peyton said as she dug her hands into her jean pockets, "You too…"

Veronica put her hand on Peyton's soft cheek and leaned in towards her. She kissed Peyton softly on the lips as they fell onto the couch. Peyton didn't know what was happening, but she got a good feeling down in her stomach. Peyton knew that she wasn't a lesbian, but just having somebody touch her and kiss her felt good. She ran her fingers through Veronica's long, blonde hair and ran her tongue along her bottom lip. Veronica reached up Peyton's shirt and let her thumb graze Peyton's nipple; Peyton let out a soft moan as the kiss deepened between the two. Veronica took off her shirt and Peyton looked at her perfect breasts; Veronica let out a small giggle and kissed Peyton again. Peyton got on tip of Veronica and undid her pants. Veronica smiled and undid Peyton's pants; she reached into her panties and felt Peyton's body begin to shake.

"Don't worry," Veronica whispered in Peyton's ear.

Peyton pulled back and zipped up her pants, "I don't know if I can do this Veronica…"

Veronica sat up and watched as Peyton stood up and looked down at her, "Peyton…" She said in a caring tone, "Is this your first time with a girl?"

"Well…Yeah," Peyton said, "I had no idea you were gay!"

Veronica licked her lips, "I'm bi."

"Well that would explain all of this," Peyton began as she put her hand on her forehead.

Veronica stood up in only her jeans and pink bra which favored her cleavage. She walked towards Peyton and pushed her softly against the wall, "You've never even wondered what it's like to be with a girl?"

"I mean I have," Peyton began, "And it's not like Brooke and I have never drunkenly kissed before at some party."

Veronica took Peyton's hand and placed in on her breast, "You're not going to die because of one night with me."

"You're Nathan's ex girlfriend," Peyton began, "And my best friend doesn't really like you that much to be honest."

Veronica shrugged as she linked her fingers into the belt loops of Peyton's jeans, "This isn't about Nathan or about Brooke. This is about me and you having a little fun before I leave."

"Okay," Peyton said in almost a whisper.

Veronica smiled and unzipped Peyton's jeans, "It's going to be okay," she said and then got down on her knees.

**xxx**

Brooke smiled as she rolled over and felt Nathan next to her; he kissed the top of her head and sighed, "I'm glad Haley and Lucas are satiated in their own room."

"Me too," Brooke said as she breathed in his scent, "So what are we now?"

Nathan put his arms around her and shrugged, "I want you to be my wife again Brooke."

"That sounds perfect," Brooke said and then looked up at Nathan, "Do you think we could make it work again?"

Nathan stood up and reached into his jacket pocket; Brooke got up and looked at him in confusion. Nathan pulled out a small velvet box and got down on one knee, "Brooke Davis," he said as Brooke began to cry, "Will you marry me?"

Brooke nodded as the tears fell down her face, "Yes!" She said and then jumped into his arms. She put on the ring and smiled as she kissed him, "I love you."

"I love you too," Nathan said as he ran his hand through her auburn hair.

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	45. Just Whisper My Name

**The Bitter Taste**

**Just Whisper My Name**

_You don't realize how strong a person is until you see them at their weakest moment._

**xxx**

Nathan turned over to his side and saw Brooke playing with the wedding ring on her left finger. "You're not happy with the ring?" He asked.

Brooke looked at him; surprised he was awake, and shook her head, "No…The ring is gorgeous it's just…" She stopped and took a deep breath, "I love you Nate, but I don't want to rush into things again."

"I want you to have the ring Brooke," Nathan said sternly, "I want you to know that I love you and that I want to be with you…Forever."

Brooke couldn't help but smile, "I know," she said and then propped up on her elbow and faced Nathan, "I love you too baby," she whispered, "I just want to wait a little bit before we get married."

Brooke kissed him on the lips, after the kiss broke Nathan smirked, "I'll wait forever," he said and then kissed her again.

**xxx**

Peyton lay on the couch and looked up at the ceiling fan. She watched it go around and around and around. What had happened? She had slept with one of her best friend's ex girlfriends, and then her best friend's enemy. Peyton looked over and saw the paper with Veronica's number written perfectly beside her. She had just started some lesbian relationship with a woman that had left her life just as quickly as she had come. Peyton got up from the couch and touched her lips; they were still numb from the hours of kissing and biting that had gone on between the two. Never in her life did she think that something like that would've happened. Maybe it was because she missed Jake, but for a woman to fill her needs? It was crazy. It wasn't her. Peyton walked into the kitchen and got herself a beer; she rubbed her eyes and ran her fingers through her mess of a hair. She heard the doorbell and groaned. Great.

Peyton walked over and opened the door; Jake stood there with Jenny standing beside him holding his hand. Peyton blinked her eyes a couple more times and gave him a big hug.

"Hey," he said with a smile.

The hug broke and Peyton stepped back with her hands over her mouth, "What are you doing here?"

"I understand that you have this life here that you don't want to leave, but I want to be in your life Peyton," Jake began.

Peyton smiled and kissed Jake on the lips, "You don't know how good it is to hear that…"

"I love you Peyton," Jake said softly as he cupped her face, "When you walked out that door I realized that I was making the biggest mistake by not following."

Peyton put her hand on top of Jake's and then took his hand as she led Jenny and Jake upstairs. They walked into Eric's room and Jake went over and looked into Eric's crib. The baby looked up at him and smiled; Jake smiled down at the baby and then looked over at Peyton who was holding onto Jenny with a tear in her eye, "He's amazing Peyton."

"Thanks," she said as she walked over towards the crib.

Jake kissed the top of Eric's head and set him back down in the crib, "So what do you say?" He asked Peyton, "Can we try this one more time?"

"Yeah," Peyton said as she choked up a little bit. Jake smiled and the two of them hugged each other tightly. Jake kissed Peyton on the lips; Peyton took his hand and walked towards her bedroom. They continued kissing until they fell onto the bed.

**xxx**

Lucas walked along the beach with his sneakers in his hand. He smiled to himself; everything was going perfectly for him. His wife lay in bed at home after their countless hours of sex. To think, his childhood best friend was now his wife. Everything about her was perfect; the way her almond eyes looked up at him when she was happy, and then her body fit in his. He sat down on the beach and looked up at the setting sun.

He saw a shadow behind him and turned to see Peyton standing there with Eric on her hip "Is there enough beach here for all of us?" She asked.

"Yeah," Lucas said with a smile as Peyton sat down and sat Eric in front of her. They just listened to the ocean for a little bit; Lucas looked over at Peyton, "How's life Peyt?"

Peyton smiled, "Well…Jake's in my bed sleeping right now if that's any clue…"

"That's great," Lucas said as Eric grabbed a hold of his finger, "You happy?"

Peyton looked at him and then looked down at her son, "Yeah…" She said and then looked back up at Lucas, "I am."

"Can you believe everything that's gone on and the last 6 years?" Lucas said as he let out a deep breath, "Kind of makes you wonder…"

Peyton shrugged, "I'm pretty damn happy about what's gone on these last couple of years."

"Me too," he said, "A lot of shit has gone down between us Peyton, and I just want to say—"

Peyton cut him off, "There's no need to bring up the past Luke," she said, "Everything happens for a reason. You're married, you're happy! I've got a wonderful son and Jake is back…I'm happy too!"

"I love you Peyton," Lucas said.

Peyton gave him a warm smile, "I love you too Luke…"

**xxx**

Brooke walked into Karen's Café and ordered a coffee; she sat down and got out a pen and paper. She tapped her fingers lightly on the table as she scribbled down lyrics. A hand slammed down a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. Brooke looked up and saw Chris Keller standing there. He smirked down at her and Brooke rolled her eyes and continued writing. He sat down and peered over to see what she was writing.

"And watched my bad habits just flush away," Chris said out loud.

Brooke glared up at him, "Is there a reason you're here?"

"I'm back in town for a couple of days," he began, "There's this fine chick who commented me on my website…Sent me a pic and everything," he said raising his eyebrows.

"You met a girl through the internet?" Brooke said with a dry laugh, "Can you be anymore pathetic?"

Chris leaned back in his chair and shrugged, "I've been kind of out of my game since that nice kick in the balls you gave me a few months back…"

"Chris," Brooke said in annoyance, "Back then…I was a different person. I was probably drunk and fucked up on some pill so let's just leave the past in the past."

He stuck his hand out for handshake, "Deal!"

Brooke looked at his hand and rolled her eyes, "It still doesn't mean that I don't hate your guts."

Chris put his hand down and folded his hands, "So…You and Natey-Poo back together?" He mocked.

"Not that it's any of your god damn business but yet."

"Such a harsh tongue Brooke," he said with fake hurt.

Brooke slammed her pen down and looked at him, "What do you want from me Chris?"

"I've got this guy…Cooper," Chris began, "He's just starting out in the music business and I figured you two could work together."

She looked up at him and groaned, "What's the catch?"

"No catch!" Chris said as he put his hands up in defense, "Come on…I'll take you over to the studio now to meet him."

Brooke grabbed her stuff and followed Chris out to the car. They drove up to his old apartment/studio. They walked into the studio and Brooke saw the most gorgeous guy in the booth playing the guitar. He had gorgeous blue eyes and black hair. He looked up and smiled at Brooke; he took off his head phones and walked out.

He put out his hand, "Cooper Walker," he said with a sweet smile.

"Brooke Davis," Brooke said as they shook hands.

They heard a knock on the door and Chris clapped his hands together and smiled, "Time to meet the best fuck I've ever had," he said in a cocky manner.

Cooper shook his head and laughed, while Brooke rolled her eyes. Chris opened the door and Brooke's jaw about dropped. There stood Rachel. She gave Chris a passionate kiss and then looked over at Brooke. Brooke knew that Rachel remembered her.

Chris looked between the two and couldn't help but let out a small laugh, "Do you two know each other?"

Rachel cocked her hip and licked her lips, "Yeah…I fucked her husband…"

"You know what?" Brooke said and then lunged at Rachel. She got on top of her and punched her right in the face.

"Chick fight!" Chris screamed as he stood back and watched.

Rachel rolled on top of Brooke and slapped her hard in the face, "You bitch!" Brooke screamed and then grabbed Rachel by the throat. Brooke felt somebody grab her; she kicked at Rachel and kicked her in the ribs. Cooper finally set Brooke down when they were in the parking lot; Brooke kicked Chris's car and put her hands on her head.

"Take deep breaths," Cooper said as he grabbed onto Brooke's shoulders so that he could steady her.

Brooke did as he said and began taking deep breaths, "I'm going to fucking kill her."

"I don't want to be rude but…What happened?" Cooper asked after Brooke had regained some of her control.

Brooke sighed, "I was married and Rachel was my husband's secretary and he ended up having an affair with her, causing me and him to divorce and to fight and all this shit…"

"A guy would have to be a complete dumb ass to cheat on you," Cooper said genuinely.

Brooke smiled and ran her fingers through her hair, "That's really sweet of you Cooper, but I'm sorry to say that I forgave the "dumb ass" and we're kind of back together," she said showing him her engagement ring.

"That sucks," Cooper said with a laugh as he leaned against a car, "You're really pretty Brooke."

Brooke looked down at the ground to hide her red cheeks, "Where were you a couple months ago?"

"Rough time?" He asked.

"Very," Brooke said, "All I needed was somebody to care about me back then…"

"But now you have this boyfriend of yours," Cooper said with a smirk, "If you forgave him then he must be a good guy."

"He is," Brooke began, "We've been through so much together."

Cooper smiled and looked at his watch, "How about getting a couple drinks with me?"

"Cooper," Brooke said warningly.

"You love this guy right?"

Brooke nodded, "Yeah…"

Cooper opened his car door and looked at her, "Then you have nothing to worry about."

**xxx**

Brooke drank her last martini and felt the bar begin to spin, "I think I've reached my limit."

Cooper laughed as he finished off his beer, "One more before we clock out."

"Okay," Brooke said, "Hold on, I have to go to the little ladies room," she said with a drunken giggle and staggered away.

Cooper watched her go and took out a small pill from his pocket. He set it in Brooke's drink and smiled to himself.

Brooke walked into the bathroom and saw Rachel standing there applying cover up to a bruise on her cheek. She looked over at Brooke and glared, "The whole bruise thing is a nice look for you," Brooke said in a bitchy tone.

Rachel looked at her and shook her head, "You know…I get why you did this. I slept with your husband and ruined a good relationship, so to make it up to you let me give you some advice—Cooper isn't a good guy, Brooke. He's a troublemaker and he's looking for one thing and one thing only."

"Thanks _mom_," Brooke spit, "But I think I can handle myself."

Before Brooke could leave the bathroom Rachel grabbed her arm, "Do you think I'm lying to you?" She said sternly, "You want to know what happened to me when I refused to have sex with him?"

"What," Brooke said softly.

Rachel wiped her eyes quickly, "He drugged me and raped me."

Brooke looked at her and got into her face, "I don't believe you," she said finally and walked out of the bathroom.

Brooke walked over to the bar and Cooper handed her her drink, "Let's make a toast," he said as he held up his beer.

Brooke looked at her drink and threw in Cooper's face, "To what? Taking advantage of people by putting date rape drugs in their drinks?"

Cooper looked at Brooke and was speechless; he stood up and towered over her. Rachel came between them and pushed Cooper back down in his seat, "I think you've had a little too many tonight Coop," she said and then grabbed Brooke's arm and headed out to the parking lot.

They drove in silence until they reached the house. Rachel stopped the car and looked at Brooke, "So you did believe me?"

"I watched him put the pill in my drink," Brooke said as she looked down and then looked back at Rachel, "And maybe I believed you."

Rachel sighed, "What happened between me and Nate…"

"Look Rachel," Brooke began, "Thanks for the help with the whole Cooper thing, but this doesn't make us friends and I sure as hell don't trust you now."

Rachel nodded her head, "I was just going to say…That what happened between me and Nate never affected how much that guy loved you. I didn't want you making the same mistake tonight with Cooper."

"Thanks for the ride," Brooke said as she got out of the car. She walked to the front door and watched Rachel peel out of the driveway. Before she could open the door Nathan ran out and hugged her.

"I was worried about you!" He said as he kissed the top of her forehead, "Where were you?"

Brooke looked up at him and kissed him passionately, "I just went for a little walk…I needed time to think about things." It started to rain and Nathan went to go inside; Brooke stopped him and smiled, "Kiss me in the rain Nathan," she said softly. He kissed her passionately, "I love you…"

"I love you too," Nathan said.


	46. Seasons Change

**The Bitter Taste**

**Seasons Change**

_Don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want._

**xxx**

Brooke lay on her back and looked up at the ceiling as she played with a brown lock of her hair. She rested her hand on Nathan's arm and kissed his shoulder blade. He turned over and faced Brooke; they smiled at each other and Nathan kissed her passionately.

"You going to tell me what happened last night?" Nathan asked.

Brooke bit her bottom lip and looked into Nathan's eyes, "Chris invited me over to his studio, and there was this guy there…And Rachel was there," Nathan's face fell and he ran his fingers through his hair, "I went to this bar with Cooper and he said all the right things to me Nathan," she began, "Rachel warned me. She told me what an ass the guy was…I left and Rachel brought me home."

"I wish I could've been as strong as you are," Nathan began; Brooke gave him a confused look and he kissed her forehead, "This guy Cooper…He said all the right things to you. You could've easily gone back to his house with him, and you didn't…"

"Because I love you," Brooke said softly, "I always have and I always will…"

Nathan smirked, "I love you too," he said, "And don't think for a minute that that has ever changed."

"I don't," Brooke said, "You're the one for me Nathan Scott, and no matter what happens I'm yours…"

"You're beautiful Brooke Davis," Nathan said as he gave her a quick kiss and brought her into his arms.

Brooke smiled and closed her eyes, "Brooke Scott," she said correcting him.

**xxx**

Haley walked into Karen's Café and sat down in a little booth and ordered a cup of coffee. She got out her book of baby names and opened to the first page. She sighed and wrote down a couple of cute names she liked. She took a sip of her coffee and ran her fingers through her long hair nervously; she was late, and she had yet to tell Lucas. Not that Lucas would be mad if Haley were pregnant, it was just one of those things that Haley wanted to get checked out before she ran to Lucas with the news.

She looked over and saw Chris walk through the door; he looked over to her and smiled. Haley smiled back as he came over and sat across from her. Chris was different around her; maybe because they were once engaged and because Haley was the only person that Chris could open up to. Chris looked at the book and smirked, "You're pregnant?" He questioned.

"I'm late," Haley began, "And it might just be a false alarm or something…I have an appointment tomorrow."

Chris nodded and took the piece of paper and pen, he jotted something down and then slid the items back over to Haley, "Mackenzie," he said as Haley read the name on the paper, "That's what we always wanted our daughter to be named."

Haley looked up at Chris and smiled, "Yeah," she said and then closed the book and looked at Chris, "How are you doing?"

"I'm okay," Chris said with a shrug, "How are you doing? I heard things with you and Lucas are running pretty smoothly."

Haley nodded, "Yeah…We actually got back from our honeymoon a couple days ago," she began, "Have you been seeing anyone?"

"Sort of," Chris said as he leaned back, "I've been just kind of dating around…Trying to find a girl like you."

"You'll find somebody better," Haley said as she looked down at the table.

Chris put his two fingers under Haley's chin and brought her face up so that they were looking into each other's eyes, "I know we kind of left things bitter between us…But I want you to know that I forgive you for everything that happened between us, and I just wish I could've been a better guy for you."

"Chris," Haley said sympathetically, "I had no reason to cheat on you like that…You're a really, really great guy and you deserve somebody great."

"**You're** great Haley," he said softly, "And I know I can't be saying this because you're in love with somebody else but…I love you Haley James."

Haley shook her head, "You're right…You can't be saying this to me, and it's Haley James Scott."

Chris wiped his eyes quickly and stood up from the booth, he looked down at her as he put his hands in his pockets, "You'll always be Haley James to me, kid…" He said sadly and then walked out of the café. Lucas watched from outside the café and watched as Chris walked past him.

Lucas followed Chris down the street and then grabbed him by the neck and slammed him up against the wall. Chris put his hands up, "Whoa man…"

"Leave her alone Chris," Lucas said sternly.

Haley walked out of the café and saw Lucas with Chris slammed up against a building, "Lucas!" Haley screamed as she ran over and pulled him off of Chris, "Lucas! What the hell are you doing?"

Chris rubbed his neck and Lucas looked down at Haley, "Why the hell is he talking to you Hales?" He screamed.

"We were just talking Lucas!" Haley said as she looked at Chris, "Are you okay?" She said to him.

Lucas let out a dry laugh, "This isn't about him! This is about us!"

Haley shot a glare at Lucas, "What about us Luke?"

"What's going on with you?" He asked, "What's so secretive that you can't tell me, but you can tell this guy?"

"I'm late!" Haley said angrily, "There! You happy now?"

Haley walked away as Lucas followed her; he grabbed her arm and she turned around, "Are you pregnant?"

"The test is positive, but you know how those things are," Haley began, "I have an appointment tomorrow, and I was going to tell you after the appointment."

Lucas looked at her in confusion, "Why couldn't you just tell me?"

"I didn't know how you would handle it Lucas," Haley said apologetically.

"I love you…" Lucas said as he backed away from her, "Isn't that enough for you?"

Haley watched as Lucas walked away, and she crossed her arms and turned around to see Chris standing there looking at her. He walked over and hugged her, and Haley hugged him back. "Come on…" He said as they started walking towards his car.

Haley walked into Chris's apartment, "Sit here," he said and then went back into his bedroom. Haley sat down and looked at the pages of lyrics that were sprawled out on his coffee table.

Chris walked out with a big scrapbook and sat down beside Haley; he handed it over to her and she opened the book, "Oh my god," Haley said as she looked at all the pictures of the two of them.

"Look at you," Chris said with a laugh as they looked at a picture of Haley drunk and Chris holding her up.

Haley laughed, "I was never a good drunk," she said and then turned the page. There was a picture of Haley showing off her engagement ring as she and Chris were on stage singing.

She closed the book and looked at Chris; their lips were inches apart and Chris titled his head and kissed her softly. Haley ran her fingers through his spiked hair as the kiss deepened. She leaned back as Chris got on top of her; he unbuttoned her shirt and threw it on the floor. He took off his shirt and Haley played with the necklace around his neck as her tongue laced his bottom lip. Haley opened her eyes and pushed Chris off her gently. She got up and grabbed her shirt; Chris sat there on the couch and looked up at her.

Haley put on her shirt and walked over to him; she put a caring hand on his cheek, "I don't love you anymore Chris…"

"You love him?" Chris asked her, referring to Lucas.

Haley nodded and smiled, "With all my heart…"

"You wouldn't be here if you love him," Chris shot back.

Haley bit her bottom lip and felt the tears form in her eyes, "You're wrong…I'm leaving…**because I love him**."

**xxx**

Jake and Peyton lay together on the couch as Jenny slept on the other couch, and Eric slept in his crib. Peyton looked up at Jake as he kissed her on the top of the head, "I could get use to this," Peyton said with a relaxed sigh.

"Me too," Jake said as he rested his chin on the top of Peyton's head, "I'm glad I came back…"

Peyton smiled, "Me too," she began, "I missed you so much."

"I don't deserve you Peyton…"

"If you're always looking for reasons not to be with somebody, and you always find them, then I guess at some point maybe you should let go and give your heart what it deserves," Peyton said as she put her hand on Jake's cheek, "You deserve me Jake…You're the guy I'm supposed to be with."

Jake kissed Peyton passionately and then kissed the tip of her nose, "Look, I have a confession to make. I'm scared. I didn't wanna say anything to you 'cause I know how much this means to you and you deserve to have nights like this but, the truth is, I'm afraid to go through all of it again…"

"I'm scared too," Peyton began, "But you're going to have to trust me and I'm going to have to trust you…We can make this work. I promise."

Jake smiled, "I know…"

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	47. Leave The Pieces

**The Bitter Taste**

**Leave the Pieces**

_Just because someone is not in your life anymore, doesn't mean the memories aren't in your heart_

**xxx**

Haley sat at the river court and smoked a cigarette; she looked out towards the river and threw a stone in. She pulled her jacket tighter around her as a gust of wind blew past her.

"Hey," she heard somebody say. Haley turned around and saw Brooke coming towards her, she sat down beside her and pulled out her own pack of cigarettes, "I thought you quit?" Brooke asked.

Haley looked at Brooke, "I thought you quit?"

"Once in a while won't kill you," Brooke said with a smirk.

Haley smiled and then ran a hand through her hair, "I forgot how well these things relieved all my stress…"

"You want to talk about it?" Brooke asked as she took a drag of her cigarette.

Haley sighed, "I saw Chris a couple nights ago at Karen's…And I also thought I was pregnant, but I figured out yesterday that it was just a false alarm…"

"I'm sorry Hales," Brooke said sympathetically.

"Lucas saw me with Chris and flipped out," Haley continued, "And I went back to Chris's place…"

"Oh my God…Haley…" Brooke began, "You didn't?"

Haley shook her head and threw her cigarette down, "No…No! I love Lucas way to much to do that to him. I mean, he's my husband, but the thing is…I haven't seen him since the day at Karen's. I mean…" Haley said as she began to cry, "I've called everyone I possibly could."

"Haley," Brooke said softly as she put a hand on Haley's back, "He probably just has a lot on his mind right now."

"I've called him about 100 times," Haley cried, "I've probably left him 30 voice messages, 50 text messages…I don't know where he could be?"

Brooke brought Haley closer towards her and rocked Haley in her arms. Brooke didn't have to say a word… All Haley wanted was to be held for a moment, and a shoulder to cry on.

**xxx**

Peyton sat at the kitchen and sipped her coffee slowly; Jake had taken Eric and Jenny to the park for a couple of hours, leaving her to have the house to herself. It had been going good for the last week or so. Peyton felt like, for once in her life, that she had her own real family. Peyton heard a knock on the door and got up and opened the door. Veronica stood there and smiled at Peyton.

"Veronica…" Peyton said as her jaw dropped.

Veronica smiled and walked inside the house, "Surprise!"

"What are you doing here?" Peyton asked.

She laughed and locked the door; she walked towards the living room and sat on the couch, "I came to see you of course…Come sit down."

"It's good to see you Veronica, but…" Peyton began as she sat on the opposite couch as Veronica.

Veronica cut her off, "I was passing through and I decided to stop and see you," she said and got up from the couch and walked towards Peyton, "I missed you…" She said as she put her hand on Peyton's knee.

"Look…Some things happened after you left," she said as she shifted away from Veronica, "My ex-boyfriend…Well, sort of my ex-boyfriend came back and we've decided that we're all going to be a family." Veronica scoffed and stood up quickly. She crossed her arms and turned away from Peyton, "I'm sorry, but what happened between us…It didn't mean anything."

Veronica snapped around and laughed cynically, "You basically threw yourself at me Peyton!"

"Are you serious?" Peyton said as she stood up and glared at Veronica, "**You kissed me!** And you know my mistake for going with it, but you and I both know it just sort of happened."

Veronica rolled her eyes, "Is he what you really want? It might be fun playing family for a while, but it'll get old soon. You can't trust him! He's let you down so much!"

"You don't know him," Peyton yelled, "You're acting like you and I were going to have some sort of relationship…I like you Veronica, **as a friend**, but I'm not gay!"

Veronica looked down at the ground and then grabbed her purse, "Fine," she said coldly and then walked towards the door and unlocked it, "You know Peyton…You've got to start living for yourself not for other people," she said and then walked out of the house.

Peyton closed the door and listened as the car screeched out of the driveway. Her phone vibrated on the table and she looked at the name on the screen; she picked it up, "Hey…Yeah, I'll be there soon," she said and closed her phone. Peyton sighed and grabbed her coat and then walked out of the house.

**xxx**

"I think we should just have a small wedding," Brooke said as she and Nathan laid together on their bed, "Cause our last one was pretty big, and the second time around I just think we should go for small."

Nathan put his arm around Brooke, "And then for our third wedding we can just go to the Little White Chapel in Las Vegas and get married for $20," he laughed.

"Oh no buddy," Brooke said with a laugh, "There is no third time for you," she said and then looked into his deep, blue eyes, "We're going to make it work this time."

Nathan smiled and winked at her, "I can't believe I ever let you go," he said as he ran his hand through her hair.

"I know!" Brooke teased and then kissed him softly on the lips, "Now you're **never** going to get rid of me."

He laughed and then let out a deep breath, "So now that our little drama is over, what's been going on with everyone else?"

"Hales is devastated because she thought she was preggers, but false alarm, and then she saw Chris, Lucas saw her with Chris and flipped out, and now she can't find him anywhere," Brooke said quickly and then let out a breath.

"Poor Hales," Nathan said as he took Brooke's hand.

Brooke nodded, "I just remember how much I used to hate her…And now the two of us are best friends."

"Yeah," Nathan said with a chuckle, "A lot's changed since high school…"

Brooke laid on her back and looked over at Nathan who was looking at her, "I'm glad though…"

"And why's that?" Nathan asked.

Brooke bit her bottom lip, "Because I couldn't see myself with anybody else…" They both smiled and Nathan wrapped his arms around Brooke and passionately kissed her.

**xxx**

Peyton walked into a hotel room a couple miles from Tree Hill and saw Lucas sitting on the bed with a bottle half empty in his hand. Peyton stood in the doorway and looked at him.

"Thanks for coming Peyton," Lucas said as he looked up at her.

Peyton opened the door wider and Haley walked through and stared at Lucas. Lucas looked at Peyton and then looked at Haley; Peyton looked at Haley, "I'm going to wait in the car…"

"Okay," Haley said. She closed the door and walked towards Lucas. Lucas got down on his knees and leaned against Haley as she ran her fingers through his blonde hair. He looked up at her and Haley slapped him hard across the face.

Lucas fell back and put a hand on his cheek, "I guess I deserved that," he said softly.

"How dare you," Haley said through clenched teeth, "What the fuck makes you think that you can just run off whenever you please?"

Lucas sat back on the bed and put his head in his hands, "I was confused Haley…I saw you with Chris and I didn't know what to do…"

"Did you get my messages?" Haley asked.

Lucas nodded, "Yeah I got them…"

"Do you even fucking care Luke?" Haley screamed, "How could you? I had to go to that appointment by myself, and I had nobody there to comfort me when he told me that it was a false alarm!"

Lucas stood up, "I'm sorry," he said as he walked closer towards her.

"Don't come near me," Haley said as she back away, "You know what? This little stunt just made me realize that we're not ready for a baby. Hell Lucas, I don't even know if you're ready to be a husband."

Lucas wiped his eyes and grabbed onto Haley, "I love you more than anything else in this world," he said sternly, "You're my wife! I'm you're husband…"

"Then starting acting like it," Haley said sadly, "Chris doesn't mean anything to me and you know that."

Lucas grabbed Haley's left hand and kissed it, "You will never understand how sorry I am…"

"Yeah," Haley began, "You're probably right," she said and then walked out of the hotel room.

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	48. Maybe Tomorrow

**The Bitter Taste**

**Maybe Tomorrow**

_You can have it all. You just can't have_

_it all at once._

**xxx**

Haley looked up at the clock as the little hand moved. She smiled and tried to think about all the good things she had gone through while on tour. It had seemed like ages ago since she had sung on a stage in front of millions of screaming people; they were all there to see her and only her. That's what excited her most about performing; all eyes were on her. Usually, her parents or relatives would describe her to be shy and just a face in the crowd, but singing gave her a way out of that. Haley didn't know what she could possibly say to Lucas after their little encounter, it was like he was a different person all of a sudden. People change, that's what she had learned the last 6 or 7 years. She herself had changed as well. Everybody changes and it's either for the good or the bad. Haley closed her eyes and exhaled through her nose. She tried to think positively; maybe everything would work out in the end. So far everything had been going good.

Haley played with her wedding ring and bit her bottom lip. A pair of headlights about blinded her as they came through her bedroom window. It was Lucas. She just knew. A car door slammed shut and she heard footsteps walk up onto the porch and then she heard the front door open. Haley didn't know why, but she had stopped breathing for a while. It was something she had done as a kid; she thought that if she stayed as quiet as possible then she would turn invisible, and right now she wanted more than anything to be invisible.

"Hi."

He looked so nervous, Haley thought to herself as she looked at Lucas standing in the doorway of their bedroom debating whether or not he should come in or just stand there. It was like it wasn't his room anymore, he felt like an intruder.

"Hey."

And that's when they both jumped from the loud boom of thunder and the flash of light. Haley looked out the window and saw the rain start coming down; a bolt of lighting striked and immediately lit up the dark room where the two of them were. Say something, Haley thought to herself. They both were speechless, not knowing what to say or how to say something. A fight wasn't something easy to get over.

"I'm sorry for ever making you think that I'm not ready to be a husband," Lucas began; Haley opened her mouth to protest but he stopped her, "Let me finish...I would do anything for you Haley and I love you so much, and I know that I haven't shown it in the best ways these last couple of days, but I was scared."

Haley closed her eyes tightly as the sudden pang of sadness came over her, "Don't you get it Luke? I'm scared too! I'm scared of losing you forever. I don't want to be the girl who falls in and out of love; I finally found the person who I want to be with the rest of my life and the person who I'm secure with…And that person is you."

"Haley," Lucas said breathlessly as he walked into the room and reached out for her.

Haley took his hands and pulled him on their bed; he looked into her eyes as their noses touched slightly, their breathing in unison, and their hearts pounding. Haley put her soft, delicate hand on his scruffy cheek as he lightly kissed her top lip. Lucas quickly took off his shirt; Haley bit his ear lobe gently as he began to unbutton her shirt. They kissed passionately as Lucas's hands roamed Haley's body, she yelped in excitement when he finally went into her.

"Don't stop," Haley said as Lucas thrusted harder and sucked on her neck.

Lucas laid on his back as Haley caught her breath; they both laid there looking up at the ceiling in complete silence, except for the rain beating on the windows and the occasional thud of thunder. Lucas looked over at Haley, who was crying. He rolled over and stroked her cheek lightly with the back of his hand, "Hey," he said softly as she tearfully looked up at him, "What's wrong?"

"There's something I didn't tell you Luke," Haley said through her sobs.

"What?" Lucas asked as his wife looked up at him with the saddest eyes he had ever seen.

Haley sat up and wiped her nose, "I…I can't get pregnant Lucas," she said as she looked away from him.

"Baby," Lucas said as he wrapped his arms around Haley and let her cry on his chest, "It's okay…"

Haley looked up at him and slammed her hands down, "It's not okay!" She screamed causing Lucas to flinch back, "All I ever wanted in life was a husband who I loved and the house with a white picket fence maybe a dog running around and then a baby," she began and then whispered, "That's all I wanted."

Lucas opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came up. He didn't know what to say; he had always wanted a baby, but now he was put in the reality that he and Haley couldn't have one. Lucas didn't the only thing he could; he held Haley and let her cry. That was all she needed, just to cry.

"I love you Hales."

**xxx**

Jake quickly got Eric and Jenny into the car as the rain started to come down harder and harder. He put his hood over his head and got into the car; he revved the engine and looked back at the kids to see if they were okay. He turned back around and saw a woman standing at his window; Jake jumped and cursed to himself as he smacked his knee off the steering wheel.

"Can I help you?" Jake asked as he rolled down the window.

The girl smiled, "Hi…My car broke down a while back and I was just wondering if you could maybe give me a lift to Scott's Motors?"

She seemed friendly enough, Jake thought to himself. "Sure," he said and then unlocked the doors so she could get into the passenger's seat.

"This means a lot," the girl said and then smiled, "I'm Veronica."

Jake smile, "Jake," he said and then pulled out from the park, "It's like hell out there."

"Yeah," Veronica said as she looked back at the two kids who were starting to fall asleep, "Wait," she said, "You're Peyton's Jake?"

Jake laughed, "Or she's my Peyton," he joked, "You know Peyton?"

"Yeah," Veronica said with a smirk, "We're old friends…" She said and then bit her top lip slightly, "Has…Has she ever talked about me?"

Jake drummed his fingers on the steering wheel and then looked at Veronica, "You know, I don't think she has."

"Oh," Veronica said as she hid her disappointment, "We were close."

Jake smiled as he stopped at a red light, "Peyton's an easy person to get close to."

"Do you love her?" Veronica asked and then looked at Jake with piercing eyes.

He quirked his eyebrow and laughed, "Wow," he said and then shifted in his seat uncomfortably.

"I didn't mean for it to come out that way…" She said apologetically, "I just…I love Peyton, and I don't want anybody to hurt her, and well…If you don't love her then I think you should just leave with your daughter."

Jake looked at Veronica and shook his head, "You should get out…Scott's Motors is just a block down or so…"

"You're kicking me out of your car?" Veronica asked bitterly.

Jake unlocked the doors, "Yeah, I am. I get that you used to be old friends with Peyton, but what Peyton and I have together is none of your damn business, so I would really appreciate it if you got out."

"Ass," Veronica spat as she got out of the car and slammed the door shut.

Jake walked into the house with Jenny beside him and Eric in his arms. "You guys are home," Peyton said as she rushed to them both and kissed Eric on the forehead. She went to kiss Jake but he turned his head; Peyton hugged Jenny and then stood up, "Jenny, why don't you go upstairs and get a bath?"

"Okay," Jenny said as she ran up the stairs.

Peyton took Eric and shifted her weight onto one foot, "What's wrong?"

"I met one of your friends today," Jake said as he continued walking into the living room, "Veronica."

Peyton's heart stopped; she held her ground and waited for Jake's next move. He sat on the couch facing Peyton and looked down at the ground. "Well…"

"She told me that if I didn't love you then I should leave," Jake said, "And she told me that she loved you and wanted what was best for you."

Peyton went into the living room and sat on the opposite couch, "She **was** an old friend…I knew her before any of this ever happened. I don't see why you're upset?"

"God dammit Peyton," Jake said as he stood up and put his hands in his pockets, "I understand you telling Brooke or Haley about us because they're your best friends, but some complete stranger that I don't even know?"

"Jake I'm sorry," Peyton said as she changed her tone, "Look, I was grieving and she was there. Brooke had Nathan, Haley had Lucas. I just needed somebody to talk to."

Jake sighed, "It just pisses me off to think how lonely and unhappy you were…"

"But you're here now," Peyton said as she stood up and walked over to him, "And we're going to be together forever…All of us," she said as Eric reached up and grabbed Jake's nose.

Jake laughed, "I just…I don't want you to talk to that Veronica girl anymore. The way she told me she loved you made me sick."

"I don't talk to her anymore," Peyton said as she stroked Jake's cheek, "I love you."

Jake kissed Peyton, "I love you too Peyt…"

**xxx**

"I love the rain."

Brooke looked out the big window in the living room that overlooked the beach. Just watching the waves made her feel like a little kid watching fireworks for the first time. It looked so dangerous; that's what intrigued here. The waters were rough and the waves were high and came crashing down hard on the shore. She looked over at Nathan who was typing away at his lap top while occasionally looking up the TV which had a basketball game on. Nathan looked up and looked over Brooke who was staring at him; when they made eye contact Brooke quickly looked away and started humming to herself. Nathan laughed and shook his head as he continued working. Brooke looked at him again and stuck her tongue out; Nathan looked up and as he did Brooke turned back around again. When Brooke turned around again Nathan wasn't on the couch and his lap top was just sitting on the coffee table.

She looked around and then felt somebody tackle her onto the couch; Nathan sat on top of her with her hands pinned down as she laughed, "Shouldn't you being working?" Brooke asked as she cocked her brow.

"I'm trying…Really," Nathan began, "But _somebody_ keeps distracting me!"

Brooke smiled, "Sweetie, the only person to blame is the person that is letting themselves be distracted," she said matter of factly.

"Don't act all innocent," he said as he kissed her softly on the cheek.

"Oh but I am innocent," Brooke said sweetly and then sat up, "You should get back to work though…You know, since you're all important and stuff."

Nathan laughed and picked up Brooke, "That's it," he said and then carried her upstairs.

"Nate! Nate!" Brooke squealed as he they got into the bedroom. He set her down and Brooke looked around the room; the lights were dimmed and the bed had white rose petals spread across them. She looked at Nathan with tears in her eyes and studied the room. A bottle of champagne and glasses were set on the bedside table and chocolate covered strawberries were set next to them, "Nathan," she said, "You didn't have to do this, this is so sweet."

Nathan leaned against the doorframe and smiled lovingly at Brooke, "I wanted to do something special," he said and then walked towards her.

"You've done enough baby," she said and then kissed him. He rested his hands on her ass and smiled down at her.

"There's one more thing," Nathan said as he walked over to his dresser and pulled out a long velvet box. He walked over to her and opened it; it was a diamond necklace with the word Forever on it, "I saw it and I knew that I had to give it to you."

Brooke put her hands on her mouth and wiped her tears quickly, "Nathan," she said her voice soft.

Nathan helped her put on the necklace and then kissed her neck, "It says forever…Because we're going to be together forever and I want you in my life forever."

"I feel the same way baby," Brooke said as she cupped his face in her hands, "You're amazing," she said and kissed him on the lips and seductively let her tongue trail across his bottom lip.

**Read and Review.**


	49. We’ve got the Rain on Our Side

**The Bitter Taste**

**We've got the Rain on Our Side**

_I believe we write our own stories--and each time we think we know the end, we don't. Perhaps luck exist somewhere between the world of planning, the world of chance, and from the peace that comes from knowing, that you just can't know it all. Life's funny that way--once you let go of the wheel, you might end up right where you belong._

**xxx**

"Peyton," Brooke said as she walked into her house and hugged her best friend, "I got your text and I came right away. What's wrong?"

Peyton sat there and bit her thumbnail as she looked straight ahead at Eric's crib which was set a couple feet in front of her. Her eyes were wide and bloodshot, Brooke noticed, it was a sure sign that she had been crying. Brooke had gotten the urgent text message while going through some of her and Nathan's stuff. She was more than happy to come over because she needed some girl talk herself, but she knew that Peyton was in need to hear **her** problems.

"I did something," Peyton said simply as her voice cracked. She looked over at Brooke who looked at her expecting more, "I regret it so bad…"

Brooke put her hand on Peyton's leg and felt her flinch; Brooke cautiously moved her hand away from Peyton and set it on her own lap, "What happened Peyton? Did something happen with Jake?"

Peyton shook her head, "I don't know how it happened," she began to rant, "I was there and she was there and it just happened. I didn't want it to happen!" She said, almost in a pleading voice.

"Tell me what's wrong!" Brooke said as her own eyes began to water.

"I slept with Veronica," Peyton said after a moment of her and Brooke looking at each other.

Brooke's face fell as she uncomfortably shifted, "Veronica? Like…The **girl** Veronica? **Nathan's ex** Veronica?"

"Brooke it was a mistake," she said sadly, "God, it was the two of us just in this room and I was so upset about Jake and she was just here and it just happened…"

Brooke looked down at the couch she was sitting on and stood up quickly, "I never knew you were…"

"I'm not!" Peyton quickly cut her off, "I needed to tell you because I knew that you would listen and understand me…And because Veronica is threatening me and telling me she loves me."

Brooke sat back down and bit her bottom lip, "I don't really know what to say Peyton…"

"I know it's weird okay? I know," Peyton began, "But trust me when I tell you that I don't like girls like that. It was a one time thing and it was a mistake."

"Okay," Brooke said.

Peyton let out a deep breath and leaned back on the couch, "Are we still best friends?"

Brooke looked over at Peyton and smirked, "Don't ever doubt it for a second," she said as they hugged, "Have you told Jake?"

**xxx**

Brooke walked into her house and saw Nathan sitting at the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal and reading a sports magazine. She walked into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of wine. Nathan looked up at her and finished chewing, "Everything okay with Peyton?" He asked as he looked back down at his magazine.

"Yeah," Brooke said as she took a sip from her glass, "She just needed somebody to talk to."

Nathan nodded and then looked up at her and smiled, "Her and Jake should come by sometime and maybe Haley and Lucas. We can have a big dinner on the beach or something…"

"You'd love for Haley to come wouldn't you?" Brooke mumbled into her glass.

Nathan looked up at her, "What?"

"You'd love Haley to come wouldn't you?" Brooke screamed, "How much louder do you need me to say it?"

Nathan stood up and walked closer towards Brooke, "What in the fuck are you talking about?"

Brooke roughly opened up the cupboard door and tore dozens of letters out and sprawled them across the counter, "Want to explain this?"

"You're going through my stuff?" Nathan asked angrily and then walked out of the kitchen.

Brooke grabbed a couple letters and followed him into the living room, "Let's see…Oh fuck me, this letter was postmarked the day that we got married. Let's read it shall we? Nathan, I would love to get re married once I came back. I love you too and I'm so glad we're making progress," Brooke threw the letter in his face and screamed, "When did you send **her** the letter? When?"

"Two days before we got married," Nathan said softly.

Brooke bit her bottom lip and turned around so Nathan couldn't see her crying, "I won't bother reading the rest to you out loud because I'm pretty damn sure you already know what they have to say!"

"There's nothing I can say," Nathan said as he ran a hand on the top of his head.

Brooke threw the rest of the letters to the floor and crossed her arms tightly across her chest, "Why didn't you tell me about the letter?"

"I don't know," Nathan said with a shrug as he looked helplessly at Brooke.

"The worst part about being lied to is knowing you weren't worth the truth," Brooke spat as she walked past him and out the door.

"Brooke!" Nathan yelled as he walked out of the house and ran towards her; he grabbed her by the shoulder and stared at her, "I was confused Brooke!"

"If you were so confused then why would you ask me to marry you and then go through with it?" Brooke asked sadly.

"Because I love you," Nathan said breathlessly, "I loved Haley then too and…And I fucked up."

Brooke shook her head and sat down on the steps leading to their front door, "Let me just sit her and pretend I'm worth something to you."

"You are," Nathan said as he sat down beside her, "You're everything to me…"

"Every time something goes good for us fate somehow fucks it up," Brooke said. She had stopped crying, but the pain in her voice still lingered. She turned towards Nathan and grabbed his hand, "I want to be able to know that we **can** make it as husband and wife again Nate…I want to be able to trust you and I want to know if you're in this with your whole heart."

Nathan kissed her hands, "I'm in Brooke. **I'm in**."

"Is this ever going to be good enough for you?" Brooke asked softly and then walked back into the house.

**xxx**

Peyton walked into the room her and Jake shared and saw Jake frantically packing a suitcase. Peyton cleared her throat and Jake turned around; he looked at her with a face mixed with anger and sadness. Peyton walked over to him and sat on her bed, "You're leaving…"

"I know about you and Veronica…" Jake said as he crossed his arms and looked down at Peyton, "When were you going to tell me?"

Peyton sighed, "I was going to right now," she said, "But I guess I'm too late…"

"Why…Why wouldn't you just tell me?" Jake asked sternly.

"Because I was embarrassed and ashamed," Peyton said as she brought her knees up, "How'd you find out?"

"I heard you and Brooke talking about it," Jake said as he zipped up his suitcase.

Peyton looked away from him as a single tear rolled down her cheek, "So much for being a family," she commented cynically.

"I can't do this Peyton," he said as he looked around at the surroundings, "_This_ is too much for me to handle right now."

Peyton wiped her tears and closed her eyes, "You're just going to leave again? Like the last time and the last time? What? Are you just disgusted because I was with another girl?"

"I don't know what to think," Jake said as he let out a deep breath, "I didn't realize things were going so bad that you had to resort to being with women."

Peyton stood up and pushed Jake back, "Exactly!" She yelled, "You **didn't** realize things were going so bad because you were never there!"

"And whose fault is that?" Jake yelled back, which made Peyton jump. She had never heard Jake yell before, "You're always chasing me away!"

"You're always running away Jake! If anything I'm chasing after you," Peyton said as she stood up and paced her room, "I love you," she whimpered.

Jake walked closer towards her and put his hand on her cheek, "You miss him," he said simply.

"What?" Peyton said as she backed away from Jake in what seemed like utter disgust.

"Lucas," Jake said, "For as long as I've known you, you've loved him more than anybody…"

Peyton felt her knees get weak so she grabbed on to her bed banister, "This isn't about Lucas," she said through gritted teeth.

"Of course it is," he said quietly, "I need to go Peyton."

He reached for Peyton and she stepped back, "Don't."

"I don't want it to be like this," Jake said.

Peyton rolled her eyes, "I don't want you to leave, so I guess the both of us aren't going to get what we want."

"I do love you," Jake said as he grabbed his suitcase and walked towards the door.

"Famous last words?" Peyton said sarcastically as she turned away from him and looked out her window.

Jake sighed and walked towards Eric's room and took Jenny's hand. He looked down at Eric sleeping in his crib and kissed the top of his head. Jake and Jenny walked out of the house and Jake looked up at Peyton's window where she was standing looking down at him.

**xxx**

Haley heard a knock on her door and opened it to see Brooke and Peyton both standing there with tear stained cheeks. Haley smiled warmly and opened the door wider so the girls could come in. Peyton buried her face in Haley's shoulder, "Jake left," she said and then began to cry again.

"Peyton," Haley said in a nurturing voice, "You need some sleep," she said and then rubbed Peyton's back as she walked back towards the bedrooms.

Peyton opened a bedroom door and saw Lucas sitting there putting on his socks; he looked up and smiled at her, "Hey."

"Hey," Peyton said as she quickly tried to wipe her tears away, "That's good that you and Haley are good again."

Lucas smiled, "Yeah," he said and then looked at Peyton closer and his smile fell, "What's wrong?" He asked as he walked towards her.

"Jake left," Peyton said as she looked down at the ground.

"Hey," he said softly and pulled her into a hug, "Are you okay?"

Peyton shook her head, "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah," Lucas said as the hug broke, but he still had a hold of her arms.

"Why did you call me that one day to come down to that motel room?" Peyton asked.

Lucas shrugged, "I don't know. You're just the person I kind of run to when I have problems…"

"I feel the same way," Peyton said as she smiled sadly.

Lucas smirked at her and rubbed her arm, "You're going to be okay Peyton. You're going to find somebody else."

Peyton closed her eyes and kissed Lucas suddenly, "I love you," she said after he pulled away.

"I…I can't," Lucas said as he took a step back. Peyton touched her lips gently and rushed out of the room and locked herself in another.

**xxx**

Haley sat down in the kitchen and sighed, "Poor Peyton," she said and then looked up at Brooke who was staring at her, "What?"

"I know about the letters," Brooke said with bitterness dripping from her tongue.

Haley groaned and leaned back in her chair, "I know you're probably really upset but…"

"There is no but," Brooke said in a harsh voice, "How could you do that to me?"

"I was a different person back then. Hell, we were all different people back then Brooke," Haley began, "I missed Nathan and he was with you and I was jealous."

"So you take me in and become one of my best friends and never even bother to tell me?" Brooke asked.

Haley shook her head, "I forgot about the letters Brooke to tell you the truth. Half of them were probably just drunk doodling," she said with a small laugh.

"Obviously they meant something because Nathan kept them," Brooke said with a pang of hurt in her voice, "It's like I'm never good enough."

Haley stood up and gave Brooke a confused look, "Nathan and I don't love each other anymore Brooke! The things that happened between us are in the past and we've come to accept that and so have you! I don't **want** Nathan," she said, "I have Lucas."

"I'm sorry," Brooke said as she put her face in her hands, "God…"

Haley gave her a hug, "Don't apologize."

"I just…I never want to feel like somebody doesn't want to be with me," Brooke said as she wiped her nose, "He's the most important thing in my life and that scares me sometimes."

Haley smiled softly and they both turned as the front door opened. Nathan walked in with his hands in his pockets; Haley wiped Brooke's tears, "I bet it scares him too," she whispered and then walked back towards her room.

Before Brooke could even say a word Nathan walked up to her and held her close, "I burnt them," he said quickly, "Every single letter."

"Nathan," Brooke said as she looked up into his eyes, "You didn't have to do that."

"Of course I did," he said with a cute little smirk on his face, "And I'm telling you right now…This is good enough for me. This is all I need. I'm in alright? I'm all in. Forever."

Brooke kissed him, "Thank God," she said as Nathan held her in his arms.

**Read and Review.**


	50. Linger

**The Bitter Taste**

**Linger**

_There is always going to be that one person you wish you could be with, even after knowing, that person doesn't want to be with you._

**xxx**

**5 months later…**

"Finally we get to throw you a bachelorette party!" Haley squealed as she, Peyton, and Brooke sat at the kitchen table. Peyton and Brooke looked at each other and laughed, "What?" Haley asked.

"You're more excited for the party than I am," Brooke said as she tried to sneak a glimpse at the piece of paper Haley was jotting things down on.

Haley put her arms over the paper, "This is all a surprise," she said as if she were a 5 year old with a secret, "You're not going to know what's happening until later tonight."

"Do you know all about this?" Brooke asked as she turned to Peyton.

Peyton nodded and smirked, "Of course I do. Did you think Haley thought of all of this stuff by herself?" She teased.

"This is really nice girls," Brooke said, "Thank you so much," she gushed.

Haley put her arm around Brooke's shoulder, "You deserve it Mrs. Scott," she said in a sing-songy voice, "If you think you're thankful **now**, just **wait** till tonight!"

Lucas and Nathan both walked in, "What are you three doing?" Lucas asked as he grabbed a water bottle out of the fridge.

"Planning Brooke's bachelorrete party," Haley said with a big smile.

Nathan covered his ears, "Not listening…"

"Oh Nathan," Haley said as she hit his arm, "Don't worry, we're not going to get in any trouble," she said and then winked at Brooke.

Nathan walked over to Brooke and hugged her from behind, "Be good," he said and the kissed her on the cheek.

"I always am," Brooke said with a twinkle in her eyes, "What do you have planned for your bachelor party?"

Nathan shrugged as he leaned up against the counter, "I don't know…Me and Luke will probably just sit around the house playing X Box360 or something."

"That _almost_ doesn't sound boring," Haley said as she scribbled down more things on the paper.

Lucas chuckled, "Oh and we might order a few strippers…"

"What?" Haley and Brooke both screamed as they looked up at Lucas.

Lucas and Nathan both laughed, "We're not going to get strippers," Lucas said as he walked over to Haley and his fingers through her hair, "But does our X Box360 thing sound so boring now?"

"Not at all!" Haley said as Brooke nodded her head in agreement.

Brooke cleared her throat, "Besides, if you guys did order strippers. Haley and I would both be put in jail for man slaughter."

"Exactly," Haley said.

Peyton sat there and watched as Nathan and Brooke kissed, and then as Haley and Lucas kissed. She was the 5th wheel; she always had been. She knew that they just saw her as little Peyton, the girl who couldn't commit, the girl with the problems, the girl that always had a way of fucking things up. She looked up and saw Lucas staring at her; it had been weird between them after the night Jake left. Peyton kissed him. She knew it was wrong because he was her best friend's husband, but that didn't stop her. Peyton was hurt and ashamed of the decisions she had made in her life, and the fact that she was completely alone didn't help. She looked away from Lucas and looked into the living room where Eric was playing with blocks. He was the only guy for her, she thought to herself with a smile. Eric was the only person in Peyton's life that needed her. At night Eric was the person she could count on. She never knew being a mother could be so exhilarating.

"Peyton…"

"Peyton!"

Peyton looked up and saw Haley waving a hand in front of her face, "Earth to Peyton," she said.

"Sorry," Peyton said as she rubbed her eyes, "I was just…Thinking."

Haley put her hand on Peyton's shoulder, "You look tired babe," she said and then sighed, "Are you feeling okay?"

"Yeah," Peyton said with a smile, "I must've been thinking too hard," she said with a stifled laugh.

Haley smiled, "Alright," she said and then stood up, "Well, we're all getting our make up and stuff done soon, so if you need to shower or anything before we go you're more than welcome."

"Thanks," Peyton said and then bit her thumbnail as she watched Haley walk back towards the hall. Peyton stood up and walked into the living room and saw Lucas sitting on the couch holding Eric in his lap. She leaned against the wall and watched Lucas kiss Eric on the cheek and lift him up in the air making him laugh.

Lucas looked over at Peyton and smiled as his cheeks turned pink, "I didn't know you were standing there…"

"You're lucky I didn't have a camera," she joked and then walked towards the two of them. She kneeled down and kissed the top of Eric's head, "He really likes you, almost as much as he likes Nathan."

Lucas smiled and then looked at Peyton, "We need to talk Peyton…"

"Not today," Peyton said in a pleading, tired voice, "What happened was…It was something stupid I did because I was sad and I was lonely."

"You can't keep doing this," Lucas began, "You can't keep doing things because you feel a certain way and then the next day take it back."

Peyton took Eric in her arms and stood up, "Who ever said I took it back?" She asked and then walked out of the room.

**xxx**

The three girls all loaded into the hummer limo and Brooke was surprised to see Bevin and some of the old girls she used to cheer with in high school. As soon as Haley turned on the radio and opened the champagne the girls went crazy. Brooke drunkenly sat on Haley and Peyton and put her arms around them, "This is so great!" She slurred.

"This is only the beginning," Haley said with a smile, "Go have fun," she said and then smacked Brooke's butt as she sauntered away. Peyton and Haley laughed as they watched Brooke dance on the pool which was appropriately put in the middle of the car.

Peyton smiled, "I've never seen Brooke this crazy before."

"Just wait till we take her to the strip club," Haley said with a laugh, "So Peyton," she said as she poured them both a glass of champagne, "How are things with you?"

"Good," Peyton said with a smile, "I feel kind of bad though for leaving Eric with Nathan and Luke."

Haley shrugged as they clinked glasses, "If they're just going to stay home and be losers than they can watch the cutie," she said and then bit her bottom lip, "Besides…I don't really think Lucas minds."

"He loves kids," Peyton said as she nodded.

Haley smiled, "I know…Which is why he and I might be adopting sometime this month," she squealed.

"Haley!" Peyton said in shock, "That's great! I'm so happy for you two! Does Brooke know?"

Haley nodded, "I figured I would tell her before the party so that she didn't completely forget it the next day…I'm so nervous! I mean…I'm going to be a mom!"

"It's a surreal thing Hales," Peyton said as they hugged, "You're going to be a great mom."

The limo stopped and Brooke looked out the window, "We're going to a strip club?" She screamed and then started dancing around.

**xxx**

Lucas and Nathan both sat there as they played a basketball game, Nathan put the controller down and took a sip from his beer, "Six games later and I'm still kicking your ass!"

"I let you win cause this is your party," Lucas said as he turned the TV to ESPN.

Nathan rolled his eyes, "Yeah, yeah," he said and then looked over at Eric who was sound asleep on the floor, "Brooke told me you and Haley were thinking about adopting…Good for you man."

"Yeah," Lucas said as he looked at Eric, "The both of us have always wanted kids, and when Haley told me that she couldn't have any adopting seemed like the best way."

Nathan smiled, "You two are going to make great parents," he said and then opened another beer, "So Peyton seemed a little quiet earlier today."

Lucas sighed, "Ever since Jake left and that whole thing she's been acting different. I can't talk to her about it because…" Lucas stopped.

"Because?" Nathan asked.

"Never mind," Lucas said, "It's not important."

Nathan let out a dry laugh, "Obviously it is…"

"Well…Peyton told me that she loved me and then…" Lucas began and then looked at Nathan who was waiting for more, "She kissed me."

Nathan groaned and ran a hand through his hair, "Man," he said and then shook his head, "What'd you do?"

"I pulled away what the fuck do you think I did?" Lucas said and then finished off his beer, "It was the smallest of kisses."

"She's always had something for you Luke," Nathan said as he looked back towards the TV, "You just gotta set things straight with her."

Lucas let out an exasperated breath, "Yeah I know," he said softly and then walked back to his room.

**xxx**

"That was great, that was great!" Brooke sang as Peyton and Haley both led her towards the limo, "Wasn't that great girls?"

Haley humored Brooke, "Yeah Brooke…It was great."

"Oh come on!" Brooke began, "You two had fun I know you did!"

"In the car Brooke," Peyton said as she gently pushed her in the limo. She shut the door and laughed as Brooke sang loudly, "Well that was a night."

Haley smirked, "At least the bride had fun…"

"Yeah, and her bridesmaids had to stop her from dancing on the tables," Peyton said as she leaned against the car.

Haley laughed as she recalled the memory, "Well it **was** a strip club, so at least the things she was doing weren't considered out of line or anything."

They both laughed and Peyton looked down at the ground, "There's something I've got to tell you Haley."

"Shoot," Haley said.

Peyton took a deep breath and then looked at Haley, "I think I'm in love with Lucas…"

Haley's jaw dropped and she took a step back, "What?"

"Haley I…" Peyton tried,

Haley opened the door quickly, "Don't say a fucking word!" She screamed and then got into the limo.

Peyton closed her eyes and bit her top lip; she got into the limo and sat there quietly; she looked over at Haley who was looking out the window. Brooke sat in the middle of them and looked between the two; she opened her mouth to say something, but went against it. She slid down in the seat and closed her eyes.

**xxx**

Haley walked into her room as if she were a zombie; Lucas went to reach for her but she walked right past him and laid down on the bed still dressed in her clothes. Lucas rested his hand on her back and leaned in close to her, "Hales," he said softly.

"Peyton…She loves you," Haley said with a mix of sadness and anger in her voice.

Lucas tried to wipe one of her tears, but she pushed him away, "Haley don't be like this."

She sat up and looked at him, "How can she love you?" She asked through gritted teeth.

"It doesn't matter," Lucas said in a hushed voice as he cupped her face, "I love you…"

Haley fell into Lucas's arms and cried, he stroked her head as they both laid down together.

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	51. In Between Dreams

**The Bitter Taste**

**In Between Dreams**

_If people are truly, madly, deeply in love with each other, they will find a way._

**xxx**

"Haley," Peyton had managed to get out as she stood in front of her now former best friend. Peyton had gotten the courage from Karen to go to TRIC and try to settle things with Haley. It had been at least a week since Brooke's bachelorrette party and things with her and Haley had been…Well…Non existent.

Haley, who had been sorting through a bunch of records, looked up at her quickly and mumbled a "hello" which had been the only thing she had spoken to Peyton since the incident in the limo.

"Look," Peyton finally said after a moment of uncomfortable silence, "I know telling you that I loved Lucas was wrong, but…"

Haley snapped her head up and glared at Peyton, "You're right. It **was **wrong and there's no 'but' about it. Lucas and I are married," she said now raising her voice, "You don't do that to a person."

"Hales you're my best friend," Peyton said with a weak smile on her face.

Haley let out a dry laugh, "Really? So telling me that you're in love with my husband is what a friend does to another friend? Sorry I didn't get that memo," she snapped and then walked away.

Peyton went after her, "I told you because I wanted you to know that I'm not going to try anything with him," she began, "Haley, you're friendship means so much to me and I would never do anything to ruin it."

"You already did," Haley said in a strained voice, "I know you're lonely Peyton okay…But…"

Peyton cut her off, "Yeah I am lonely," she said as she held back tears, "I just want you to not be mad at me anymore."

Haley bit her bottom lip and looked down at the ground, "I have things to do," she said and then walked off.

Peyton felt a hand on her shoulder and turned and saw Lucas standing there; she wiped her eyes quickly and moved so that his hand fell off her shoulder. "She'll be okay," he said referring to Haley, "She's just upset right now…"

"I know," Peyton said as she watched Haley and Brooke laugh and talk to each other, "I didn't mean to mess things up between her and I…I was just being honest."

Lucas nodded and noticed Peyton wouldn't make eye contact with him, "You know Peyt. You and I are close and we'll always be close; and I do love you, but as a friend. We'll always be friends I promise you that."

"I don't think I can be **just** friends with you Luke," she said tearfully, "I look at you and Haley together and I just think about what you and I could've had…"

"So you're saying we can't be friends?" Lucas asked as he narrowed his eyes and stared at her.

Peyton groaned and put her hands over her eyes, "I need to go home," she said and then walked away.

"Peyton," Lucas said as he went after her, "Peyton!" He screamed louder as he followed her outside to the parking lot.

She finally turned around, "Stop doing this to me!" She screamed loudly and then fell down to the rocky ground and sobbed.

"Stop doing what?" Lucas said as he raised his voice and kneeled down beside her.

Peyton put her head down on her knees and wept, "Just let me walk away," she said in almost a whisper.

"I'm not going to do that," Lucas said, "Please don't run away from things."

"If I don't run away then I'm just going to ruin everything," she stated, "Do you know how I feel when I see the look of disappointment in Haley's eyes? Or how I felt when Jake walked out the door and left me again?"

Lucas rubbed her back softly, "Jake's a complete idiot for leaving you. I respect the guy and he's always been a friend, but him leaving you was probably one of the dumbest things he's ever done."

"It's my fault he left," Peyton said as she breathed heavily.

"Peyton," Lucas began, "Don't blame yourself."

Peyton bit her bottom lip and wiped her eyes with her sleeve, "No Luke," she said, "It really was my fault."

"What?" Lucas said as he looked down at her and stopped rubbing her back.

"I slept with Veronica," Peyton said and then looked down at the ground, "I was so alone…And I don't know it just kind of happened."

Lucas sat back and looked at her, "Are you serious?"

"I know it's weird to think of me getting with some girl, but I just needed someone to care about. I needed somebody to **want me**," Peyton explained, "Just…Don't think any less of me because of my mistake."

"I could never think any less of you Peyton," he said and then put a comforting hand on the blonde's knee.

Peyton bit the inside of her cheek and got up slowly, "You should get back inside…"

"Where are you going to go?" Lucas asked as he started to get up.

"Anywhere but here," Peyton said teary-eyed and then looked at Lucas for a moment, "You should get back inside."

Lucas shook his head, "I'm not going to let you leave like this," he began, "You're important to me Peyton! And I could never imagine losing you…"

"You say that now," Peyton said softly, "What about when we were together? God Luke we were together for almost 6 years and never once did you want to marry me or want to have kids with me. Why? Why wasn't I good enough for that?" Lucas ran his hand off the top of his head and opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He stood there dumbfounded and looked up at the sky as if he were searching for some kind of answer. Peyton clicked her tongue and shook her head, "Well I guess that explains it all," she said cynically and then stormed away.

Lucas looked at his watch and then walked closer to Peyton so that she could hear him, "What do you want me to say?" He yelled over to her, "I'm married Peyton! I can't have these types of conversations with you!"

"Then leave me alone Luke," Peyton yelled back and then walked up to him with her hands up by her sides, "You're wife hates me so I think I can deal without you in my life. Just let me go home to my son…He's the only guy I need right now," she said sadly and then walked away. This time Lucas let her.

"So what now?" Lucas heard a voice say behind him. He turned around and saw Haley standing there with her arms crossed smoking a cigarette.

He rested his hands in the front pockets of his jeans and squinted, "I thought you quit smoking?"

"And I thought you quit that stupid shit with Peyton," she fired back, "You can't keep being her hero Lucas…She has to learn how to take care of herself."

Lucas looked at Haley, "She's been taking care of herself all her life, Hales. Give her a break."

"Give her a break?" Haley said with a sarcastic laugh, "Yeah that is just what I'll do!"

"Are you drunk?" Lucas asked as he watched his wife stumbled around and as he listened to her words begin to slur.

Haley glared at him, "I waited for you in that club for at least an hour! And then I come outside and you're fucking talking to Peyton?" Haley threw down her cigarette and then got another one out and started to light it.

Lucas grabbed the cigarette out of Haley's mouth and threw it across the parking lot, "Why don't you trust me?"

"I do trust you," Haley said, "I just don't trust you around Peyton," Lucas groaned, "You can't blame me!" Haley exclaimed, "She's in love with you…And you act like it's not big deal."

"Because it isn't!" Lucas began, "Peyton is a lonely girl and she'll reach out to anybody who's there."

Haley bit her bottom lip and looked down at the ground, "Are we ready for this?" She asked Lucas softly; Lucas walked over to Haley and put his arms around her, "Are we ready to become a family?"

"Hales…I love you, and I want to start a family with you," Lucas assured her, "Come here," he said and kissed her softly on the lips.

The kiss lingered and then Haley took a step back, "I can't keep doing this," she said and then wiped her eyes. She looked down at her fingers to see if any mascara marks had been made, "This whole…Fighting, then making up, then crying, then fighting, then making up. It's too much Lucas."

"This is what couples do," Lucas said in a desperate attempt to keep his wife from second guessing herself; he gently put his hands on her shoulders and brought her closer towards him, "Everything's going to be messed up for awhile with this whole Peyton thing, but trust me…It's going to be okay."

Haley shook her head, "Do you really believe that?"

Lucas looked down at her and didn't say a word.

"She's always going to love you," Haley began, "Don't you get it? It's never going to be okay because I think she loves you with everything she's got."

Lucas scoffed, "So you're trying to say that she loves me more than you do?"

"No," Haley said as she turned around and put her face in her hands. She wiped her nose and put her hands on her hips, "I'm exhausted Lucas…Okay? And it makes me sick to think that every time I turn my back Peyton isn't going to be there."

"What are you trying to say?" Lucas asked as he cross his arms tightly across his chest.

Haley bit her bottom lip and looked up at the sky, she sighed and looked back in Lucas's eyes, "I don't know if this is going to work out…"

"Haley," Lucas said in a short breath as his eyes began to tear, "Come on," he said pulling her into a tight hug, "We can work this out. I promise."

Haley kept her hands placed firmly to her side as she tried hardly to hold back her tears, she squirmed out of Lucas's grasp and grabbed his hand and kissed it, "I'm sorry," she said softly, "I just don't think this is going to work out right now."

"So you're asking me for a divorce?" Lucas said as a lone tear ran down his scruffy cheek.

"I don't know what I want," Haley said as she ran her fingers through her hair, "I just…I just can't do this right now," she said and then walked away.

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